Disclaimer: Once again I don't own Criminal Minds, I just steal it once in a while and give the viewers what they want... that is all =)
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Since that night Derek had either been in the same bed if not same building as Penelope, he was willing to show her he meant every word he spoke. He's mom was due back in Chicago so Penelope had only really spent one night out of the past 5 away from Derek's place and been at her apartment.
Now he had her alone for the lunch he was going to make her do something that was bound to force her into the learning curve, make her let everything out, every inch of her soul was going to be laid bare like she'd once been able to do with him.
'What are we doing here?' She asked him, she knew this place, he had it to do work out, it was nice here, she liked the view from the back, occasionally while Derek worked out she'd bring her own work here to do or do a workout. She knew what this place consisted off.
'We're gonna get your blood pumping.'
'I'm not in the mood for a workout today Hot Stuff.'
'No work out of that type but it's gonna help.' She looked at him as he unlocked the door and pushed the door opened. 'Trust me.' It was as he said that that she entered the building, he followed smiling, she just proved she trusted him.
She stood in the large room looking timid by a place she hadn't been to in years, he watched her look around like it was her first time here and then he just stood and saw as she stopped at the big window that over looked the piece of green at the back. Silently her hand went to the glass and she just remained there looking out.
Derek hadn't seen that sight for years but it was identical to how it was, the only difference was that Penelope's hair was no longer golden curls but red curls and her head no longer sat up high.
He went over to her and put his arm around he shoulder, her attention didn't move from the view in front of him and after looking down at her once he looked up at it and shared the moment with her. 'You ready for this?'
'Born ready.' She said confidently and he smiled and led her into a smaller room. 'But not for this.'
'Na uh baby, I can promise you that this will help.' He said as he walked around a person like punch bag and put his arms on the shoulder. 'This man here is Sid, remember him? If not Pen this is Sid, Sid this is Pen.' Penelope couldn't help but laugh at him, she then stepped closer. 'This man has helped me with a lot aggression. I came and used like really beat into him when we broke up and I hope he has the same effect on you too.'
'Well how do we do this?' She asked with mock confidence.
'Simple...' He said and introduced her to the rules of the game he liked to play. She nodded warily but he gave her boxing gloves and she prepared, Derek stepped beside her after showing her how to do it and then he let her take over. 'Do whatever comes natural to you.'
He watched her start off with throwing weak punches but he taunted her about things, not menacingly but inspirationally and they were working and soon her punches got more accurate and harder and her breathing picked up as the truths began to pour out.
'I envied you.' She told him mid hit.
'Why's that?'
'For having the guts to move on when I didn't.' Derek remained silently. 'I resented you, almost hated you, for moving on with life, for getting someone new, for forgetting about me so easily.' She said as her punches gained in power and Derek stood with his arms folded. 'I couldn't understand how you could just get with someone and want to marry them and just act like nothing happened between us.
I hate myself for everything, it was my fought you were able to do that, all my fought that you could just walked away because I planted the seed that made you. I don't regret saying that I wished I had never met you because if I hadn't then we wouldn't be here, and we wouldn't have lost so much. I blame myself for getting pregnant, I mean I was carrying that baby and it was ill and I feel like it was my fought at the end of the day.
I guess that I proved my feelings right that we were never meant for one another, that all those other women were better than me as your other half. I mean look at Claire and then look at me. She's absolutely beautiful, tall, elegant, gorgeous then there's me, I'm not as tall and fat and I'm not where near as gorgeous as them.' He watched the tears run down her face and as much as he wanted to jump in and wrap his arms around her he knew he couldn't stop this now, she had to do that.
'I look at woman that are pregnant, the ones that have babies and children because I look at them and imagine what life would be like if we'd just been given the opportunity to spend even a day with him. Just to hear him cry.' Her punches became fewer and weaker as her break down continued. 'I wanted to see how good a dad you really would be and I just wanted to hold him in my arms and cuddle him...' She threw a punch and sucked in a deep breath. 'I wished you taken the ring and taken everything with it Derek and now I wished you'd never made me do this.' She said as she collapsed again the punch bag and Derek ran in and grabbed her, pulling her up and into his arms for support.
'It's okay, you needed this, you got everything out princess.' He said as he hugged her. 'I never moved on I just covered up that I did, I couldn't see a loop hole to you so I had to do what I had to and that meant forcing myself away from you and now looking at it I was just too fast for it all to happen.'
Penelope hit his chest with her fist. 'I can't hate you.' She whispered tearfully, her tears soaking into Derek's t-shirt. 'I never could, I just thought I did to make it simpler to pass the blame but no one's to blame.'
'That's right baby.'
'Why did it have to be so hard to stop loving you?' Penelope confessed and pulled away slightly.
'Because you were never meant to stop.' He said and pushed her against the wall and kissed her, she responded immediately, relaxing fully as she returned fully. The kiss started hard, started passionate, started with power and continued to grow with intensity, nothing about it weak or undesired. The love flowing with each movement of the kiss, the closer they tried to get one another grew and they seized with anticipation as they pulled away and searched each other for the wrong doing, but both smiled heatedly at the other. They'd both released the next chapter in their life.
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A.N: Later than I wanted it to be! BUT party animal took precedence =)
Enjoy!!!
