~~~Chap 8~~~
Recap!
"Oh." Was all that came out of my mouth, the anger sizzled away and was replaced by uncertainty. I didn't know what to say from here on. I looked at Gaara for help, he was looking at me waiting for my answer. I realized then that he didn't care if we were together, he wanted it, I could see the longing in his eyes. "Together." I said and looked back at the elder. "We will raise our daughter together." My voice had a more certain sound to it, I knew this was what I was going to do. I was going to live with my daughter and raise her with her father.
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All of the elders started whispering again, none of them looking at me, this time they were looking at my daughter and her father. I stared at them too, waiting for what he would say. He was looking down in to Shakana's eyes, his face blank. Shakana's little hand was patting his cheek, soft giggles coming from her lips.
Gaara gently rubber her cheek with the tip of his finger, tracing her cheekbone. "Together." He agreed, looking up at me. I smiled at him and looked down at our daughter that was still in his arms.
It took three hours to convince the elders that I was fine and was not going to dump Gaara with the child and leave, that part really pissed me off. Gaara had to hand me the child, he was afraid that he might hurt her with how short of a temper he had. I took her willingly and glared at them as hard as I could. Temari even got into the yelling, Naruto had been in it from the beginning. I was surprised that they stuck up for me, I didn't remember them that much, just small flashes.
Once we could leave, I was attacked by the girl with brown buns, she squeazed me as hard as she could, going on and on about how much she missed me. I patted her shoulder and smiled. The next three, four... six... weeks were spent with me trying to remember everything, and learning what I used to know. Gaara, Naruto, and that guy Neji were hard at work with the cabin, adding a small room to the side. I spent most of my time with the girls and my daughter, they showed me around the village and the training fields. We talked about everything and anything I could think of, favorite colors, birth dates, ages, who can tell the best stories, everything.
I remet most of the people in the town, but some stayed clear of me, keeping their children inside or with them at all times. This made me sad, but I understood. I got to talk to the girl, Anna. She was thrilled to have me back, showing me everything that she could now do, it was the happiest day sense I got back, I spent the whole day with Anna and TenTen.
At night, I stayed with Temari, Gaara's cabin wasn't done yet, and he wouldn't let me inside. Temari's place was small, smaller then Gaara's cabin, or that's what Kankuro said. It was small, really small, though, for the last 7 months or so, I've been in a palace, so I couldn't really say much. Temari and I shared the huge bed, with Shakana sleeping between us. She got bigger everyday. I was really starting to scare me. By the third week, she looked to be two and a half to three months. I could see the worry in Gaara's eyes, too, as he held her and looked down at her. Hinata said we should start measuring her, so we did. Every night before bed Gaara would come over to help me. She was growing a few inches every day.
After the six weeks were up, I moved in with Gaara. He let me set up her room, only helping when I asked. This was fun for me, I spent hours on end in there painting, moving stuff around, repainting, moving things around again. It took about a week to get everything done, then I kept changing the crib that Gaara made around. Gaara had Shakana the whole time. Sometimes when I looked up from what I was doing, he'd be standing in the doorway watching with her in his arms. He'd just smile and move away. Whenever I caught him watching me, my heart raced, thudded so loud I thought my eardrums would blow. The way he watched me is why. There was something in his eyes that made me want to go over and have him hold me. Just to be in his arms.
The baby fat was slowly leaving, I found it easier to run, easier to chase Naruto when he said something bad in front of my daughter, and easier to beat him. I still spent a lot of time with Hinata, TenTen, and Temari, but I found myself spending a lot of time thinking. Just staring at nothing while my mind wandered.
When I lived with Sasuke, after I lost my memories, he had told me about Gaara. That he was a backstabbing traitor that was nothing. That the world would be a better place once he was dead. Sasuke had talked about him with such distaste that it confused me. I never thought of asking him about it, but now it really bugged me. Had they known each other? If so, what happened? Gaara didn't seem to like him much ether, though that could be because of the whole taking me away thing. But it seemed much, much deeper then that. Like it was something they were born with. I planing on asking him about it that night.
I was standing in the room Gaara had built for our daughter slowly rocking her while I sang a song that just flowed out of my mouth. I didn't know what I was singing, but I was. The melody was soft and kept moving, always changing. I listened to myself, it was beautiful. I watched as Shakana's eyes slowly drifted close. She yawned one last time before she was sleeping, her hand curled in the blanket that Gaara had given her. He said it was his when he was a kid. Temari had kept it and a small teddy bear that was in her crib. I set her down and covered her up, kissing her head lightly. I stood there watching her, her hand reached out and took hold of the bears arm, her fist tightened around it. I smiled and softly brushed my fingers over her hair.
Gaara was leaning against the door when I turned around, he was watching me. I smiled at him and glanced back at my daughter. She was still asleep. Gaara held out his hand and I put mine in his, he gently tugged it, pulling me from the room. The door closed behind us. I walked around the bed and sat down leaning against the head board. Gaara sat and laid down putting his arms behind his head, I watched him, and he watched me. Both of us just stared, I was looking for something, anything. I had to find it, I needed to see it. But, the thing is, I don't know what I was looking for, I had no idea what I needed to see, I just know I did. My fingers fiddled with the hem of Gaara's old shirt that I was wearing, I preferred it over Temari's clothes. These ones smelled better, and I just felt right in them. My eyes were searching, I could see that his were, too. And he seemed to find what he was looking for.
Gaara sat up and moved closer to me, putting his hand behind my head and slowly leaning in, he was watching my eyes making sure he wasn't going to far. He kissed me once and backed up to read my eyes, I didn't let him get far. My fingers braided in his hair as I pulled him closer. One of his hands ghosted down my leg as he pulled me so I was lying on my back. Every inch of skin that he touched tingled. His fingers gripped the back of my thigh and pulled my leg up so my knee was resting on his waist. He was over me, settled between my legs. I wrapped one of my legs around his, pulling him closer. I found what I wanted. This was what I wanted. My lips molded with his, our tongues danced together. Gaara held himself up with one arm so he didn't crush me with his full body weight, but I wanted him to. I wanted to feel him on me. I needed him.
My hand slipped under his shirt and grazed over his chest. His muscles jumped under my touch. He broke the kiss so I could breathe, his lips never left my skin though. They trailed down my neck, down to my shoulders and back up. I giggled when he sucked a small spot under my ear, I could feel his smirk against the sensitive skin. I lifted his shirt up, and he helped me pull it over his head, his lips were back at my sensitive spot as soon as it was chucked across the room. I grabbed at his shoulder blades, trying to pull him closer to me. I could feel one of his hands traveling up my leg, reaching higher and higher, it only registered in the corner of my mind. All I could think about was getting closer to him...
"I love you." I whispered
"You are my life." He whispered back, leaning his face against my hand. I fully turned to face him, slightly climbing on top of him in the proses.
I gave him a light kiss on his cheek and laid my head on his shoulder with a small sigh. His hand skimmed over my back, tracing lines with his finger tips. His other arm wound around my waist and pulled me to him tight, a small sigh coming from his lips. Both his hands held me to him as he rolled, so that he was on top of me, sucking on my neck. A small moan escaped my lips as his teeth gently bit down on my sensitive skin.
I gasped into his mouth and started pushing him away. I pushed with all I could, he sat up with a startled expression. I pushed away from him, staring with big eyes, my breathing was still labored and getting harder as the seconds passed. My eyes flew around the room, looking for some answer to what just happened. I didn't like it, it scared me. I pulled Gaara's shirt over my knees and hugged them to my chest, I could feel the tears starting to race down my cheeks.
"Sakura?" Gaara whispered reaching for me.
"No." I whispered and got off the bed. "No." I walked into the babys room and shut the door behind me, sliding down it to the floor. I wiped at the tears but they wouldn't stop coming.
Gaara was at the door, I could hear his soft whispers, I could hear the pain in his voice. I didn't want to hear it, I covered my ears and muffled my sobs with my knees. I was so scared. I didn't know what to do. I didn't want to remember right now, I wanted things to stay like they were now. Everything was coming back when I didn't want it to, it always did. I hated it.
I stood off the floor and walked over to the crib, picking up the sleeping baby. I held her close to my chest as I walked to the window and opened it. The cool air blew against my cheeks, it was turning to fall and the leaves were starting to change color. I stared up at the big moon, it was full tonight and so bright.
– – –
"Sakura?" The door slowly opened, but I didn't look away from the raising sun. I was sitting on the wooden window cil looking out. I didn't look up as he came in. He had left last night when I wouldn't answer him, he left and had just got back. He still had his boots on, I could hear them against the floor as he walked over to where I was sitting. Shakana was looking up at me, but I didn't even look at her. "Let me take her so she can eat." He whispered softly. I reached out my arms and he took her without touching me.
He left the room. I stayed where I was. I didn't move for hours, Gaara didn't come back, though I saw him watching me from the doorway once in awhile. I never looked away from the window. I didn't want to, I was still thinking about what I remembered. That was the night of the fight. The night I lost my memory, the night I went to live with Sasuke. I needed answers, and I needed them now.
I stood from the window and walked out of the room. Gaara was talking with Naruto, Shakana was asleep on the big bed. I walked over to her and kissed her head, whispering a soft I love you. I walked over to the dresser and grabbed a pair of pants out of it, pulling them on. I could feel the guys eyes on me, they stopped talking when I entered the room. Once the pants were on and the strings pulled tight, I slipped my feet into some boots and grabbed a random jacket off the rack. I tossed the door open and walked out, I heard Gaara swear under his breath and jump up from the bed, telling Naruto to stay with Shakana.
I walked quickly, not wanting Gaara to find where I was going. It hurt just to leave my daughter like I did, but I needed those answers, and there was only three people I could ask them from, only one I could talk to at the moment. I could hear Gaara's heavy steps getting closer, I knew he wouldn't grab me, there was to many people around. I quickened my pace.
"Sakura." He grabbed my hand, forcing me to stop. I tore my hand from his grasp and turned to face him, a angry scowl creasing my forehead. "Where are you going?" He asked, standing a little to close. His warm breath flowed over my cheeks.
"You are my life.."
I shook my head and turned away. He was by my side, never slowing or making any movement to leave me alone. I didn't stop, I had to have answers. After a few seconds of my quick pace, Temari's cabin came into view, Gaara's feet slowed once he knew where I was going. He slowed to a stop, I didn't. I walked right up to her door and knocked, my hands were shaking, I could feel his eyes boring into my back.
"Sakura?" Temari's voice was surprised when she opened the door. "What's going-" She stopped speaking, I looked up at her, she was looking over my shoulder, most likely at Gaara.
"I need to talk with you." I whispered. "I hope this isn't a bad time."
"No... not at all." She glanced at me and looked back up. "Come on in, uh, theres some warm milk if you want some." She looked down at me with a small smile.
"Thank you." I whispered and followed her in, roughly shutting the door behind me to let him now to go away. "I'm sorry for just showing up like this, and this early."
"It's no problem." She smiled and poured some milk into a mug for me. "I was up anyway, going over some paper work and stuff. Now, tell me what's on your mind."
I took the mug from her and sat down on the end of her bed. I sipped it for a few seconds, thinking over what I was about to ask. I didn't want to offend her, and I didn't want to bring up anything painful, but I needed to know. I finally looked up at her after a few minutes. She was waiting with a confused look, I wonder what my face looked like, I couldn't feel it.
"What happened between Sasuke and Gaara?" I finally whispered. Temari tensed and instantly looked away with a angered expression.
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