Title: Lady in Waiting

Chapter 8: You Could Be Happy


"You'll look after her, won't you?"

Naruto's desperate words echoed in Gaara's head. After last night, he hardly felt as though he was doing that anymore. Standing under the hot spray of the shower, Gaara still remembered how warm her skin felt against his, and more troubling, the way she trembled, crying in his arms.

Looking after her? It seemed more like he was breaking her, bit by bit.

"Did I hurt you?"

The words seemed to shift something in her, and what were once soft whimpers turned into desperate cries. He could feel it – her small hands clutching at his chest, the way she buried her face into his neck.

"Yes," she'd sobbed. "You hurt me, you hurt me, you hurt me…"

He remembered the feeling of panic – so afraid that he'd done something irreversibly terrible. So afraid that someone might hear her, enter and catch them together. Gaara wanted to do something – get some kind of help, but Sakura held him close, as if begging him not to go. So he kept her cradled to him, and though her crying eventually quieted, it took nearly an hour for her to calm down completely.

She stayed quiet after that, and Gaara was left unsure of how to press further. Before he knew it, it was sunrise and he had to force himself to slip out of the room and prepare for his own day. Temari would probably say he was an emotional moron, but Gaara truly didn't know how to deal with most people in sensitive situations, let alone women.

He leaned forward and pressed his forehead against the cool shower tiles, letting hot water beat down against his back.

'Maybe this was a sign,' he thought. 'Maybe I should stay away from her."

Gaara rinsed his face and turned off the water. Just as he started to brush his teeth, however, there was a soft knock at the bedroom door. Usually Temari would stop by every morning with a cup of coffee and some fruit for him, but she was at least 20 minutes early, and he was a stickler for schedules.

Frowning, Gaara rubbed his hair with a towel, wrapped it around his waist, and then pulled open the door. Instead of Temari, however, he was greeted with a very timid looking Sakura.

"Um…"

Her pale cheeks warmed with blush, and Gaara yanked the toothbrush from his mouth. The last thing he wanted was to be seen in a state of disarray. Especially by her. Sakura, on the other hand, barely registered anything but bare skin and hard, lean muscle. Just the sight brought her back to the night before, and how good it had felt to be on top of him.

Sex with Sasuke was sometimes good, sometimes bad, sometimes unwanted, but never… anything like that. It wasn't just the feeling of Gaara inside her, but everything surrounding it. The calm and the peace – the way Gaara sometimes seemed so sweet and purposeful with his touches and gentle with the things he said.

She hadn't meant to cry. Her entire plan for Suna and Gaara was to use them for her benefit. Seduce and find his weaknesses. Blackmail him and be able to run. But suddenly it had become so overwhelming, and she was the one who felt weak in the knees. Kankuro was right - he wasn't what she'd thought he was.

He wasn't Sasuke.

It wasn't until Gaara reached forward and grabbed her hand that Sakura was brought back to reality. The door clicked shut behind them as he pulled her through the doorway, and Sakura had to look away from his bare chest in order to think straight.

"I'm sorry, I should have…" she trailed off, enjoying the feel of his hand still in hers.

"No, I'm sorry." Gaara let go reluctantly and tossed his toothbrush on the dresser. "Kankuro sometimes passes by in the morning and I didn't want him to see…"

He stopped himself, hearing how bad the words sounded, but it was too late. Sakura lowered her gaze to the floor and nodded. The few moments of silence between them felt like hours, until she finally found the courage to speak.

"About last night…" She said softly, and Gaara remembered the moment in his office days ago when she'd first arrived in Konoha. Her apology and the flirtatious invitation out. Before they'd ever gone any farther than a simple touch.

"Those words…I mean, what I said…." Sakura clenched her fists, determined to get it out. "It wasn't meant for you," she said firmly. "You never hurt me. I just…I wanted you to know that."

"Then who did?" Gaara wanted to ask, but already knew the answer. The one who'd left her behind.

Uchiha.

It didn't make sense to him. Just being around Sakura calmed him. Electrified him. If he were Sasuke, he'd never want to let her go.

"I'm just…sorry." She bowed low. "The last thing I wanted was to...I mean I really…enjoyed…"

Sakura struggled to get the right words out. She'd practiced the speech in her room for an hour since she woke up alone, but being in Gaara's bedroom… with him half naked and dripping… it was far too real.

She felt his hand on her shoulder and froze. Calloused, but gentle fingertips trailed their way up her sleeve, to her shoulder, to her neck. He let his palm rest there for a moment, and then leaned down, close enough to smell the gin on her breath. He was becoming used to the way she took the scent of alcohol with her now instead of strawberries, and it troubled him. Gaara didn't care about the apology or anything from before. He just wanted to touch her again. Make her feel better.

"If there's anything you ever want to tell me…" He trailed off, unsure. But Sakura understood. It was bizarre how much she understood. It was freaking her out, the way she found herself affected by his cool charm. Gaara wasn't the same Gaara she knew as a kid. The one who'd almost killed her – the one they called a monster.

He was warm inside, like sunshine, and she didn't deserve that.

"I want you," Sakura spoke with her eyes closed. "That's all."

The sound of longing in her voice had become a trigger for Gaara, and he couldn't restrain himself. Without warning, he grabbed her by the waist and spun her in his arms to face the bed. Sakura gasped when he dropped her down on the plush mattress. She stared up at him curiously, pink hair fanned out around her face.

"Gaara?"

"Say it again." His voice was strong and husky.

When she looked down, Sakura could see the hard outline of his erection straining against the cotton towel. Without thinking, she touched her tongue to her top lip. Gaara smirked and leaned over her body, bracing his weight with both hands.

There was something electric between them, and though she knew it was poison, she couldn't stop.

"I like to hear you say it." He kissed her nose, chin, and then the hollow of her throat. His fingertips skimmed over her bare legs, tickling.

"I want you." She murmured. "I want you." She reached for him with closed eyes, but Gaara caught her hand at the last moment and turned her back around, onto her tummy.

Before she could crane her neck to peek back at what he was doing, the edge of her dress was flipped up, and then her panties pulled down around her ankles. When he was sure she wasn't looking, Gaara tugged them off completely and held them to his face to capture her scent.

In the daylight, he had time to study her. The perfect curve of her ass, the way her vulva glistened wet with arousal and stained the cotton candy hairs there a deep raspberry. She was lovely. Even the tiny, barely-there stretch marks around her hips aroused him.

"Don't stare…" Sakura crossed her legs at the ankles in an attempt to hide herself, but it brought her rear end up higher, and only revealed more.

Gaara chuckled and spread her legs with both hands. Sakura struggled playfully at first, but the moment she felt his mouth between her thighs, gasped. Last night it was sweet, but this time, from behind, it felt more sinful. The way he suckled and kissed – how his tongue made long, hot trails over her flesh. It drove her crazy.

"Gaara…" She clutched one of his pillows to her chest as she moaned. It smelled just like him – like sweat and spice and heat. She couldn't help but press her face into the fabric, inhaling deep.

Lying there in his bed, face down, half in his mouth, it felt as if she were living in some sort of parallel universe. One where she was happy and this was normal.

With his mouth still pressed against her center, Gaara tugged his towel free and wrapped a hand around his length to stroke. He probably could have gotten off just like that – tasting her, feeling her push back against his face – but it would have been an opportunity wasted. Just as Sakura began to squirm with urgency, Gaara pulled away and quickly sheathed himself inside her. The warm, wet, almost velvety feel was overwhelming, and he forced himself to hold still for a moment to adjust.

He could really get used to that feeling.

"Gaara please…" Sakura's hand reached back to trail up his thigh. The way he filled her was wonderful, but she needed him to move.

Answering her plea, Gaara rocked his hips back, pulling almost all the way out before thrusting in hard. It was different than the night before – fiercer, more intense, but still so exciting. Sakura shifted up onto her knees to give Gaara a better range of movement, and he slid an arm under her body again, making sure to stroke her with his fingertips. A few minutes in and Sakura was so close she could taste it.

"Tell me," Gaara panted against her neck, right beside her ear. "Tell. Me. You. Love. It." His sharp thrusts punctuated each word.

"I love it!" Sakura couldn't resist. "I love your—

All of a sudden, there was a firm knock at the door. Gaara eyed the wall clock from the corner of his eye, and remembered who he'd been expecting in the first place.

'Temari…'

"Shit."

"Kazekage-sama…don't stop." Sakura covered his hand with hers and pushed back with urgency, seemingly uncaring of the disturbance. The pink haired girl was writhing desperately beneath him, and all he could think about was feeling more and more. Gaara picked up his pace and the knock came again, this time with a jiggle of the doorknob. He could only thank God it was locked.

For a second, Gaara thought of calling out and telling her to leave it in his office, but knew his voice would betray him. Instead, he leaned forward and pressed hot kisses against Sakura's neck as she came, squeezing his own finish out of him.


Sakura watched Gaara from bed as he dressed. She hadn't touched a drop of liquor since the day before, but just lying there, surrounded by his scent, she felt drunk. She'd wanted to curl her body into his and just sleep the day away, but Gaara was already running late, and she figured scheduling was a much higher priority than cuddling.

Sakura fingered the pillowcase, the smooth, expensive silk, and pressed it against her cheek. He laid his head there every night – thinking, most likely, not sleeping—and she got to share in a piece of that. Something secret and private that she was sure girls like Matsuri would have killed for.

Gaara's gaze met hers in the mirror and she felt her heart race. He had no idea how good he looked in the morning.

Why her? She wondered, watching his mouth quirk into a little smile before he pulled his shirt on over his head. He had so much power and so many girls willing to throw themselves at him 24/7. Something like this… it couldn't last. Sakura was beginning to feel a familiar sadness settle into her bones. Caring for someone and knowing it would soon slip away. She needed to detach – and fast.

The redhead ran his fingers through his hair a few times, attempting to slick it down, before finally shaking it into place. He frowned. It was getting a little out of control lately. In the mirror, he could see Sakura sprawled out on his bed, staring out into space. Her dress was pulled back down now, but the top hung open beneath her breasts.

Everything had happened so quickly between them, and he'd been more… intense than the night before – he could only hope she didn't regret it.

"I don't want to cause any trouble for you," She said suddenly. Gaara paused, but then continued to fasten his cuffs together if she hadn't said anything.

She sat up. "With your siblings, I mean. I know Kankuro just wants to protect you."

"We all have things we want to protect," Gaara pretended to check his hair in the mirror again, but let his gaze settle on her exposed breasts. "There's a right and a wrong way to go about it, that's all."

"I guess." Sakura couldn't help but notice that his tone had gone back to businesslike.

When he'd finally straightened himself out appropriately, Gaara walked back to the bed and took a seat next to Sakura.

"You're no trouble at all." He was firm. "I promise."

Sakura bit back the urge to scoff. He didn't know her enough to realize she was very big trouble. Meanwhile, Gaara felt uneasy about the sudden silence between them. One moment he thought they were approaching something wonderful, and the next it seemed like things were taking another wrong turn.

"You've added a pleasant brightness to my life." he started to put a hand on Sakura's knee, but could practically feel her bristling already.

Sakura snorted, but redness filled her cheeks. "You don't have to say things like that." She suddenly felt conscious of her half naked state, and buttoned her dress the rest of the way up.

"It's just sex," she mumbled, but the words burned her throat.

Gaara felt angry, but didn't know what to say. He didn't understand much about the intricacies behind things like dating and hook-ups – he'd never had the time or desire. But he knew he wasn't like Kankuro, or even Temari before Shikamaru. He couldn't sleep with one person one day and another the next. To him, it could never be "just sex."

Even when Shukaku was with him and he used to pay for it, Gaara only ever saw two women. Older, mother-like figures who would talk with him well into the night. It wasn't until Naruto that he realized how much other people meant to him. How important human connections were.

"We're two incredibly different people," she continued. "You have so many people who love you, and somewhere down the line I became a monster."

Gaara flinched. He hated that word. And even more, he hated that she felt that way.

"You're no monster," Gaara insisted. "Why would you ever say…"

Sakura stood up from the bed suddenly and leaned into the space between Gaara's legs. She ran her fingers through his hair, smoothing and then mussing the strands, over and over.

"It's okay. You like that, don't you?" she squeezed her eyes shut to keep from thinking too hard on the words. "How fucked up I am? It's why Kankuro wouldn't touch me, and why Sasuke ran off God knows where. They knew. But you…"

"Sakura." He grabbed her wrist in warning, not liking the way he conversation was starting to turn.

"You must really love a project. Dumb, troubled girls you can fuck into submission…" she used her free hand to a finger over the kanji strokes of his tattoo. "Especially after a while of not getting any. It must be heavenly, that power. To have everything at your fingertips."

"Stop it!" Gaara hissed. He grabbed her other wrist and yanked her down so she would have to look at him, but Sakura turned her face in the other direction. She knew if she saw his face… those piercing blue-green eyes…she'd never be able to leave.

"I'm right, aren't I?" She chuckled to herself, but Gaara saw the wetness building in the corner of her eyes. "Must be why your dick gets so hard whenever I say your title like a drunk little bimbo. Huh, Kazekage-sama?"

Gaara dropped her arms completely, stunned.

"Don't worry - I'll let you get to work." Sakura stepped away from him and out of the room without another word.

As soon as the door shut, Sakura felt sick. Like the world was spinning, and she couldn't right herself. She wanted to vomit, but nothing would come up.

"Sakura?" A female voice startled her, and she looked up to see Temari coming down the hall, holding a tray.

"M-morning," Sakura tried to look normal – tried to smile, but she could feel herself sweating from head to toe. Temari put the tray down on a table in the hallway and used one hand to steady the girl.

"You don't look so good," Temari took hold of her wrist. "Jeeze—your pulse is racing!"

"No, it…I just came back from a run." Sakura smiled, but knew she didn't sound very convincing. Especially in a dress.

"Did you just see Gaara?" Temari ignored the lame excuse and gestured to Gaara's bedroom door.

"Me? No," Sakura lied. "I just came up to ask him something, but it sounded like he was probably busy so I…I thought I'd try his office instead."

The older girl stared at Sakura for a moment before picking up the tray again. It was clear she didn't believe a word out of her mouth, but obviously she had more important things to do with her time than start an interrogation.

"You should get some rest," she suggested, and Sakura nodded, although what she really needed was a drink.

Frantic, she rushed to her room and went digging through her bags for a bottle of something – anything – but came up empty-handed. Even her friendly thermos was bone dry.

"Fuck." Sakura dropped to her knees on the floor, clutching the edges of her dress in her palms as she cried. "Fuck, fuck, fuck."

"Sakura-chan?" A small voice interrupted her struggle, and Sakura whipped her head towards the door. She'd been in such a frenzy she hadn't even realized she left it open.

"Matsuri…" Sakura wiped her eyes and forced a smile at the brown haired girl. "Sorry I…I was looking for something really important."

"Mn." The girl approached with her hands behind her back. When she reached the bed, she took a seat and pulled them out, holding a large bottle of sake. "Something like this?"

Sakura didn't know how to react, so said nothing. Matsuri was young, but she wasn't stupid.

"I noticed you like to drink a lot," she said softly, playing with the label on the bottle. "And so I thought I'd get you this."

Matsuri held out the large bottle, but as Sakura reached for it, pulled back. For a moment, she stared at the pink haired kunoichi, taking in the dark circles under her eyes and what looked like hickeys on her pale neck.

"Why him?" She pressed. Sakura tensed up.

"I don't know what you—

"You know exactly what I mean." Matsuri squeezed both hands around the neck of the bottle. "He hasn't been the same since you came here. It's a problem."

In her head, Sakura couldn't believe what was happening, but on the outside, fought to keep a neutral expression on her face. All she had to do was play it straight long enough for Matsuri to give her the sake and piss off completely.

"Is it, now?" She smiled warmly.

"I just think maybe you should spend less time trying to…seduce him. Gaara-sama is a strong, pure man."

'Pure?' Sakura thought back to their morning romp and had to bite her lip to keep from smirking.

"You're really devoted to him, aren't you?" She smiled bitterly instead, easily pulling the bottle from Matsuri's weak grip.

"I'd do anything for Gaara-sama," she said, adamant.

Sakura took the bottle, twisted open the cap, and titled it up to her lips. Matsuri watched with a deep frown as she took a large swig.

Sakura winced. It was cheap, and burned hard going down.

"It'll never be enough, you know," she smirked. "Never."

Matsuri looked pissed, but she raised her chin, defiant. "It's enough just to be by his side. Waiting. But I suppose you don't know anything about that, do you?"

"What?" Sakura white-knuckled he bottle, and the color seemed to drain from Matsuri's face.

"I mean… It's just that…"

"That your love for your precious Gaara-sama is stronger than my devotion to Sasuke?" Sakura's eyes went dark with anger, but at the same time she felt like laughing. It was bizarre how much the annoying little bitch was like her as a kid.

She needed to learn now. Now before her entire life was wasted.

"N-no…" Matsuri stammered, trying to think of something to say to smooth it over.

"Listen to me." Sakura grabbed her thin wrist and yanked the girl close. Matsuri toppled over and let out a shriek as her knees hit the hardwood floor.

"You can spend the rest of your life chasing him, but I'm telling you now… he will fuck you over." She squeezed Matsuri's wrist hard, until it began to purple under her grip. "He will fuck you until there's nothing left."

"Shut up!"

Sakura dropped her completely and Matsuri cradled her bruised wrist to her chest, sniffling.

"You just want everyone else to be as miserable as you!" She pulled herself up from the floor as Sakura took another large swallow. "You don't even care your own boyfriend's coming back!"

"What?" Sakura felt choked of breath.

"You mean you don't know?" Matsuri's lips twisted up into a self-important smirk, but Sakura was too stunned to say anything.

"Our intelligence has it that Sasuke's been spotted 150 miles outside the north gates." She headed to the doorway and shot back a dirty look.

"He can be the one to deal with you now."


AN: Fairly quick update, I'd say. :p Sorry, I know it's short. This was originally a much longer chapter like the last one, but I felt too much shit went down in the second part for me to include it all at once. Since I already have the second half ready, you can expect that one soon as well! Just trying to draw out some suspense. ;D