Thank you to all my readers for patiently waiting for answers, the next few chapters will answer many of them. Big thanks to Katnissinme, my wonderful beta, for the hard work and honest feedback. You are helping me become a better writer and I can't thank you enough for that.
Peeta's Pov
So the madness began.
I was still uncomfortable with the idea of having so many virtual strangers living so close to our home, but it was definitely too late to change that now.
I had just finished my fifth orientation and they had all gone pretty well. The first group of people who came to the community was made up of skilled workers so we were able to put them to work instantly chopping wood, tending the animals and working in the clinic. I was thankful that they came on their own before the crowds because they had been working tirelessly with us to get everyone settled in.
The community had only been open four days and already we were almost at capacity in the living quarters. The clinic was completely full. From what Katniss told me, the situation in the infirmary was worse than she could have imagined. One patient, she told me, had open lacerations on his back that became infected and healed with the infection inside. The slashes looked like they were given with a metal belt, she said, most likely from an abusive owner.
I got the feeling that the abuse of the Panem slaves was even more widespread than I had imagined, and that the American Red Cross service efforts that worked at the Displaced Persons camps had not done nearly enough to help the victims. Many people walked around here broken, holding their heads low and keeping their eyes on the ground. I wondered if they just looked at this as another camp, or if they realized that this place was intended to give them a new start. I would have asked, but most seemed wary of speaking with me.
"Hey, you. I was looking for you!" I heard my favorite voice call from behind me. I turned around to see Katniss racing towards me. I smiled at her, watching the wind pull her hair away from her face as she ran and hugged her to me when she jumped into my arms. We hadn't been getting to spend much time together recently and it felt good to hold her. I ran my hands up her back and gave her a quick kiss before I put her down. I took her hand in mine before I began to walk toward the house and brushed my thumb over her wrist as we moved.
"How was your day?" she asked me as we ducked through the trees toward the path that would lead us home.
"It was busy. I spoke to close to a hundred and fifty people today." I saw her eyebrows rise at the high number.
"And what did you think of them?"
"I think they need help. They could all stand to gain some weight. Maybe once they get settled things will pick up. How's everything in the clinic?" I asked her.
"Similar cases. Luckily, there hasn't been anyone who has needed hospitalization yet, but I did get in a few people with … suspicious injuries," she said, giving me a meaningful look.
"You mean..?" I hoped not more attempted suicides.
She nodded. "Long, deep cuts on the wrists, one or two with bruising around the neck. I can only imagine what these people have been through and I feel helpless. It hurts me to think that they preferred death at one point. They have no one to talk to about what they have been through. It doesn't look like the other refugees want to talk about their experiences either. I don't know what to do. I just keep telling myself that it will get better. It's hard to believe that I could have just have easily been in their place."
"Don't talk like that, please. I can't bare even thinking anything like that could ever have happened to you." I said close to her ear before I pulled her to me and kissed her passionately under the shadows of the tree branches.
"Did you want to come to the town hall meeting tonight or did you want to stay home with Hope?" I asked her.
Everyone in the house had been taking turns staying back with Hope and little Finn, looking over the security cameras while everyone else went and helped in the community. We all agreed that it was best to keep Hope away from the community. Things were dangerous enough as it was for Katniss and me; no one would even think to put Hope into greater risk then she needed to be.
As much as I wanted to stay home and get some private time with Katniss, that night Finnick would be running the first town hall meeting where the new community members could hear the progress and changes that would be made in the community. We had all decided Finnick would be the best choice for the job as he had been a well-known figure back in Panem. Finnick had really taken over the management of the community, and would easily be able to answer questions. I wanted to witness the first town hall meeting and see who the leaders amongst this new group were, but if Katniss wanted to stay back together I wouldn't put up a fight.
"As much as I would kill for a night to ourselves, I would really like to go to the first town hall meeting. I think Gale said he was going to stay back anyway and watch little Finn. I'm sure he wouldn't mind checking in on Hope every now and then."
"Well then, Mrs. Mellark, I believe we have a date."
Katniss's pov
The hall was filled with people. Every seat was taken and every window was blocked with bodies. Peeta and I moved unnoticed toward a back corner of the room, keeping our hands connected so we wouldn't lose each other in the crowd.
"What a crowd!" I shouted at him from a close range. It was so loud that you had to shout so the person next to you could hear your words. Peeta just nodded at me and pulled me against him when he found an empty spot against the back wall to lean against.
Finnick let out a loud whistle to gain the attention of everyone in the room, and slowly the rows of young adults went quiet. "Thank you, that's more like it," he commented after the room quieted down.
"As many of you know, I'm Finnick O'dair. In a previous life I was, for lack of a better word, involuntarily a public figure in a barbaric society that considered itself to be sophisticated and humane. I am no longer that person. If I were to guess, I would say most of you don't feel like the people you were when you lived in Panem, either. I have never known what it is like to be a slave, but I do know what it's like to suffer abuse, to not know what tomorrow may bring, and to stop fearing for your own life because you are too busy protecting the lives of those you love."
"I'm sure many of you are wondering what life here will be like for you. I can't tell you exactly what your experience here will be, but I can assure you it will be nothing like the lives you were forced to live before now. Here you are free. Here you can live and start a new life." He paused to stress the importance of the words he had spoken before he continued.
"Most of you have not been here for more than a couple of days but have already met the backbone of this operation, Peeta and Katniss Mellark. You all heard Katniss and Peeta's names before you came here, and have all listened to Peeta welcome you to the property and tell you about its features. Some of you may even have been lucky enough to have had Katniss give you your physical." He winked at me and I let out a little scowl. Peeta chuckled lightly beside me and gave my side a little squeeze.
"What most of you do not know, however, is that Katniss and Peeta voluntarily gave up the location of their hiding place in order to give all of you a chance at a new life. They spent their time, energy and resources on building this community for all of you. They have compromised their security in order to give all of you a place to go, a place you can call your own. I owe them my thanks, because everything they have done here for you they first did for me and my family. These are good people who have taken a chance on all of us when no one else would let us in."
He caught our eyes at the back of the room, telling us wordlessly that he meant every word he spoke. I had no idea he would be speaking about us and it was very humbling to here all the nice things he said about us. I didn't deserve the credit, the true power behind this was Peeta. I looked up at my husband and caught his eye. He kissed the top of my head in a quick sign of affection before he turned his attention back to Finnick.
"In return for their generosity they have asked something of all of you. They have asked for harmony and peace. They call this land home, and hope you will treat it as your home as well. Like in any American city, any major crimes will result in being turned over to the federal authorities. Acts of vandalism, theft, and other minor crimes will result in expulsion from the community. Gang affiliation of any kind will not be tolerated. If you are a member of a gang or are in the process of being inducted into a gang we strongly ask you to reconsider your allegiance. If we are not able to sway your decision, you may go in peace and we will be saddened to see you go. On these matters we have a strict no tolerance policy." Finnick cast his eyes over the crowd, stressing his point as he continued.
"We are aware that many of you may wish to join with the Panem Rebellion. While we understand your desires, we request that all rebel activity be conducted in Washington County. One of the Rebel organizers in America, Haymitch Abernathy, can be contacted easily once in Washington County. Should you decide to join with them you may still call this land your safe haven, however we are by no means a sponsor of the rebellion."
Just hearing Finnick mention the rebellion had my breathing coming harder and my chest constricting. Since Rory's death, whenever I thought of the rebellion, I just thought of how pointless death was for those too young to die. I also thought about the stabbing guilt of my untreated mother institutionalized in Panem. Had she been here in America, they could have treated her and brought her back to the woman I once knew. It was too late now, but at least I could comfort myself knowing she was safe.
"Our last request is one you may find odd. Katniss and Peeta Mellark are a couple who were unhappily thrust into the public eye as a repercussion of simply trying to do the right thing. They have been through many trials and tribulations in getting to this point, and on their behalf I am requesting privacy. Once Peeta and Katniss leave the community, please do not follow them home or request an invitation to their home. This is a security issue in addition to one of privacy. Also, please do not speak to the media about Katniss, Peeta or the community. If you are approached, we ask that you give broad, general comments or simply reply no comment. Now I will open the floor to questions."
"Yes, you sir in the front?"
"What do you mean no guns and no gangs? They're all over your fucking camp!"
That one line was all it took for shouts to start ringing out from around the room.
Prim's Pov
I listened to Finnick's speech from the shadows of the town hall porch. It was good. He was almost as charismatic as Peeta was, although he still lacked the gravitational pull of attention that Peeta elicited from crowds when he spoke. I ran my fingers along the edge of the porch rail as I thought about the past four days. Four days and over four hundred identity cards made. I only remembered a few of their names. Alright, I only remembered one, the one that left me dizzy with questions.
"Good morning, Primrose," Zeyer said as he met my eyes.
"How do you know my name?" I asked, shocked and a little nervous.
A look of disappointment crossed over his face briefly before he responded, "I saw you on the news the day of the train station press conference."
Oh right, the train station press conference, or better seared into my memory as the first day I had to wake up knowing I would never see Rory again. The day I killed his baby because I wasn't strong enough to save it. I visibly winced, and he thankfully dropped any further mention of that day.
"So, have you lived in the community long?" he asked me as I began to take down the information for his identity card.
"I don't live in the community," I replied back dismissively. My hands were shaking a little as I tapped in the information. I wish he wouldn't ask me questions because any I answered would only raise more.
"Alright," he said on a half smile. That's when I noticed he had a dimple in his right cheek. The fact that someone so tough and masculine-looking would have a childish dimple was an unexpected feature. Even more unexpected was that I had noticed it in the first place. That thought disconcerted me.
"Here you go," I said, practically shoving the identity card toward him like a weapon.
"Thank you, Primrose," he said, looking into my eyes again. His fingers brushed mine as he took the card from my hand and I saw the unmistakable edge of a tattoo sleeve under his shirt.
"Hopefully I'll see you around some time."
I hadn't responded.
A hand on my shoulder jolted me out of my memory. I turned around thinking it was Rue or Thresh coming to check on me, only to be confronted by uneven black hair, twinkling purple-grey eyes, and a right arm full of tattoos now mostly exposed by his short sleeve shirt. Zeyer, the boy I had been thinking about stood close and looked down at me. Although I suppose boy isn't the right word. His facial features held the innocence of a boy, but his eyes shown with the hardness of someone who hadn't been a boy for a very long time.
It was in the set of his face and his eyes; they were so different from Rory's boyish good looks. I shook my head trying to dislodge that spontaneous thought from my mind. How dare my subconscious even attempt to compare the two of them, even if it was on a purely physical level.
"Good evening, Primrose," he said.
Zeyer stood quietly, awaiting my reply. One of his eyebrows was raised ever so slightly as he waited. "Um… sorry… I was lost in my thoughts, I guess. Please, remind me of your name again?" His face broke out into a smirk as his black eyebrow rose even higher.
Did he know that I knew his name? Did he see my tactic for what it was? Which was just a way of keeping the situation impersonal, so I could keep my distance from him intact.
"It's Zeyer," he said with a low, smooth voice, like a strong wind brushing through the tall grass. "Why are you out here when you could be listening inside where it's warmer?" he asked. He had on a worn, white tee shirt and denim pants. A faded brown leather jacket was thrown casually over his left arm. It was pretty dark on the porch with only a small gas lamp by the door illuminating the area; I wished I was able to see the tattoos better in the darkness but my eyes just registered the markings as unidentifiable dark contrasts against his skin.
"I didn't realize it was cold," I replied, evading his question. I didn't want anyone to know that I had a fear of crowds ever since the train station day.
He nodded as if I had spoken my thoughts out loud and he understood my fear of crowds. I hated the feeling that this guy understood me and felt a slight shiver go through me as I tried to shake the uneasiness his presence created.
"I knew you were cold." He said mistaking my shiver as a sign of the chill in the air. He took his jacket off his arm and swung it over my shoulders. "Just wear it." He said as he saw me about to protest. I would have taken it off but it was warm and I liked the smell of him on it.
"I'm sorry for scaring you the other day, calling you by your name and all," he said conversationally still standing close.
"Oh, you didn't scare me," I replied a little too quickly.
He let out a low chuckle and said, "Oh yea? Then why have you run in the other direction whenever you see anyone who looks remotely like me since then?"
My eyes went wide. Oh my god, had he really noticed that? I wanted to lie and say that I haven't avoided him. I wanted to ask him why he was so self-absorbed to think that I thought about him and would go out of my way to steer clear of someone I didn't think about, but he would see through it.
Instead I shrugged and laughed softly. I guess I was caught. He laughed a little, too.
"Well, you gave off the creeper vibe. I couldn't help myself," I responded defensively. He smiled, amused at me, and I watched him scrape his cut and bruised fingers through his uneven hair.
"Well, you gave off the back off vibe, so I rose to the challenge."
"What challenge?"
"To make you smile, obviously. Your face wasn't made to look angry and pinched the way you had it when we met. I knew I'd prefer it when you smiled."
He hadn't given me a compliment per-se, but I found that I smiled a little anyway before averting my eyes. The noise level from inside the town hall rose in what sounded like an argument, but I couldn't really make out the words before Zeyer spoke again.
"Listen, I have to get going, I have an early day tomorrow. I just wanted to say hello again. I hope to see you around sometime, Primrose."
I watched him walk down the steps towards the men's dormitory. "Oh, and Primrose?" he said, turning around and looking up at me. The tips of his hair shone silver in the moonlight as he smiled at me.
"Yea?" I said amused.
"You have a killer smile," he said, turning around quickly.
I had tensed at the compliment but he was gone too quickly for me to rebuff it. I smiled in the darkness, thinking about how good it felt to smile before a voice had me turning around quickly again. I saw Johanna leaning against the far railing in the shadows. I hoped she hadn't seen Zeyer or heard our conversation. I didn't want anyone to look too closely into whatever THAT was, because it was definitely nothing.
"Well, well, well. My eyes must be deceiving me was that the Primrose Mellark actually flirting with a man not named Rory Hawthorne? It's a good thing Gale isn't here – he would have ripped your new friend to shreds."
"Shut up, Johanna, you know that was nothing. I just met him," I replied a little too protectively. The truth is her words shot straight to my heart and I felt guilt take over me. I hadn't been thinking about Rory nearly as much these past few days, and her words made that realization all the more clear.
"I know you just met him, but I also know that THAT" She tilted her head in the direction Zeyer had gone, "was definitely not nothing."
I felt shame run through me because she was right it wasn't nothing it was something. I didn't know what the something was but it had no right to continue. I was Rory's regardless of whether or not he was here with me.
"I'm surprised you noticed someone new, it's so…normal… of you.. I'm actually happy to see that you didn't have a relapse of depression after the stunt you pulled, kind of a miracle if you ask me. Do we have the flirtation with that boy to thank for that?" Johanna replied back.
"I'm not flirting with him and I haven't gone back into depression because of the medication." I responded back indignantly.
She gave me an incredulous look before she said, "Oh please, you tore off the patch." It was a statement not a question. I stiffened involuntarily and cursed myself for reacting to her words. How the hell did she know that?
"I don't know what you're talking about Johanna."
"Oh, cut the crap, Everdeen. You can fool every one else in the house, but don't insult my intelligence. Just admit it. You took yourself off the drugs."
I decided it wasn't worth it to fight with her. All she'd have to do was check the back of my neck to prove I was lying. "How did you know?"
"It's written all over your face, you're smiling for god's sake. You're expressing emotion- you're out of the numb – I can see it in your eyes, saw it a few days ago, actually. I'm impressed, you lasted a full week longer on it than I did," she said.
Wait, what? Johanna was on the anti-depressant patch? Why?
"Wait, you..?"
"Only Gale and Annie know. It was right after they shipped me back to America, I thought they were going to sell me back to... never mind. The point is yes, I chose your route, and they found me and slapped a patch against my neck and sent me on my merry way." Johanna attempted suicide? But she's so strong, I couldn't imagine her ever having given into the pain.
"Why would you?.."
"Try to kill myself?" she finished for me.
"See, this is why I wanted Gale to talk to you, he knows you, knows what you can handle." When I didn't comment she continued. "Here's the short of it. You, your sister, her cute blonde husband, and beautiful little baby, you guys don't know half of the shit that has been going on in this country. You think the government was bad? They were just puppets to the real players. Do you know why all the slaves were really released? Simple. The people who actually run this country wanted them to be. Underground factions, gangs, mobsters, whatever you want to call them, they are the ones who actually run this country."
I looked at her with wide eyes, still not really understanding. The closest things we had to gangs in Panem were the thieving street thugs, and I guess the rebellion, although I never thought of them as a gang.
"But what does that have to do with you?" I asked her.
"Who do you think bought me? Before they realized they could free the slaves and turn them into unpaid cronies one of the gangs bought me to serve them and their associates. They had.. eclectic tastes, shall we say… Anyways, after a few weeks of being chained standing to a wall I had finally managed to run. I went home and it was the worst decision I ever made."
"What happened, Jo?" I asked her quietly. She looked uncomfortable and close to tears. I had never seen Johanna cry and I wondered if she would let herself in front of me.
"They killed everyone, my whole family, right in front of my eyes. They were going to ship me back to the men that had bought me, but then the rebellion kidnapped me and stuck me on a train. They didn't tell me what was going on, they just threw me into the cold stock car. I thought when I got to the train station the men were going to pick me up. If my family wasn't safe anymore I didn't feel the need to suffer like that again, so I pried off a piece of metal from the side of the train car.."
She took a shuddering breath inwards, clearly reliving the ugly memory. I hurt for her.
"I was almost dead when Gale found me on the floor of the train car. He was supposed to bring me to Annie and Finnick's for safekeeping, but rushed me to the hospital instead. They slapped the patch on me and I went numb for a full week before Gale kissed me and... I had wanted to feel it." She shrugged as if she had no words left to tell.
Before I could say anything else, there was the sound of a bottle shattering against the wall. I flinched and Johanna quickly pulled me further into the dark of the porch. The town hall doors slammed open and three guys strode out of the doors. They didn't see Johanna and I standing in the shadows and walked past us obliviously.
"What a crock of shit. Like I'm just going to throw out my guns. Wait until the falcon hears about this one. What's worse, there are fucking unions here. I knew we should have gone to Jefferson to recruit, now we definitely have to fucking stay."
We listened silently as the three walked toward the woods, in the opposite direction of the men's dorms. Behind us the town hall was ringing in pandemonium from the constant shouting of questions. What was going on? And what were those guys talking about? What the hell was that, some kind of code? Who was the falcon? What were unions? What were these guys recruiting for? It was Johanna who spoke first in a low whisper.
"We need to get back to the house, Prim. Right now."
"But shouldn't we wait for Peeta and Katniss at least?" I questioned her. I didn't understand a thing those guys said, but whatever it meant it definitely scared Johanna.
"Do what you want. I'm getting out of here," Johanna said, swinging herself under the railing and jumping off the porch. Before I could tell her to wait she had already disappeared into the darkness.
Without really thinking about what I was doing, I ran after her, straight into the darkness.
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