24 hours.

It was exactly 24 hours since Luke died.

Those past hours were a blur to Reid. The last coherent memory he had was watching Luke being wheeled away to the OR, where greedy doctors were waiting to get their hands on Luke's organs. His liver, his lungs, his eyes –god his eyes- and of course, his heart. Reid remembers Holden helping him back into his own hospital bed. He remembers Lily coming to him, crying hysterically, thanking him for loving her son. He remembers Katie, sitting next to his bed, saying nothing, just clutching his hand as she waited for Chris. He remembers Bob coming into his room hours later, telling him that there were no complications, that Chris hadn't rejected Luke's heart. He remembers a single tear rolling down Bob's cheek. He remembers the night nurse, stopping in to check his vitals, insisting he go to sleep. He remembers laying, alone in his hospital bed, feeling nothing but numbness.

In the span of 24 hours, Luke's liver went to a 32 year-old woman in Ann Arbor; his eyes to a 15 year old boy in Sacramento; his lungs to a 28 year old woman in Albany; his skin to a 18 year woman in Minneapolis. Luke's kidneys were the only thing they weren't able to harvest, given his medical history. Reid knows he should be grateful parts of Luke were living on in other people; that Luke literally saved numerous lives. But it didn't matter because Luke was gone. His Luke was gone.

Lily had stopped by in the morning but Reid had told the nurse he didn't want to see her. He wasn't sure if he would ever be able to look Lily in the eye again. He presented her with a possibility to save Luke and she said no. He would never ever forgive her for that. Hell, he wasn't sure he ever wanted to see Holden again either. This whole thing was their fault. They did this.

-
26 hours.

It was exactly 26 hours since Luke died.

Reid was staring at the TV, barely processing what was on the screen. The nurse had turned it on, saying he needed to lose himself in something other than his own thoughts. Reid proceeded to call the nurse manager into his room and told him that under no circumstance, was that nurse allowed back in his room. Despite the huff he had made, he made no effort to turn it off.

His doctor had been in about an hour ago, checking his staples for infection. According to him, they were healing nicely and if it kept, he would be able to leave in a couple of days. He took this news with mixed feelings. On one hand, he couldn't wait to get out of here, to take a shower and sleep in his own bed. But on the other, the hospital was where Luke had died, where they had said their final good-byes. He didn't want to break that tether. But he would have to. He would have to leave and go on with life because that's what you were supposed to do. Reid wasn't sure how he would but he knew he would try. For Luke.

He had already made the decision to leave Oakdale. There was no way he could stay now, with reminders of Luke at every turn. The neuro wing would go on without him. He would help Bob or Chris or whoever the new chief of staff would be with hiring his replacement. And as soon as they were hired, he would get the hell out of here. He wasn't sure where he'd go. Maybe back to Dallas. Or to the Mayo Clinic. Maybe he'd take a page out of the Hughes book and go to Africa. He didn't know nor care. Just as long as it was far away from this place of memories.

A gentle knock on the door broke Reid's trance. He turned his head quickly, praying that it wasn't Lily. Even though he gave strict orders to the nurses to keep her away, he wouldn't be surprised if she found away around them.

Instead of Lily who stepped in, it was someone Reid never thought he'd see again. Noah.

Noah looked...well, horrible. As he stepped in, Reid surveyed his appearance. He was wearing the same clothes as yesterday, his eyes were bloodshot, and he clearly hadn't shaved in awhile. Reid said nothing as Noah stepped in. He hesitantly took a couple steps towards the bed, but stopped short of sitting in what Katie was calling, "her chair." Noah was looking at the ground, biting his bottom lip. He clearly had something to say to Reid, but Reid stayed quiet. He had nothing to say him, but clearly Noah had something to say to Reid.

Noah finally looked up with tears in his eyes. "I'm...god, Reid. I'm so sorry." His voice was thick and he had tears in his eyes.

"For what?" Reid asked, his voice showing no signs of emotion.

"For not getting out of your way where Luke was concerned." Noah took another small step towards the bed, still out of reach for Reid, which he appreciated. "I refused to see how much you meant to him. How much he had fallen for you. Watching you last night...changed all that for me."

Reid snorted. "Wow, how kind of you, Mr. Mayer. I'm so glad my hysterics over Luke was what got you there." He wanted Noah to leave. He couldn't do this with him, not now –maybe never.

"I deserve that," Noah replied quietly.

"Actually no. You deserve nothing. To be frank, Noah, you mean absolutely nothing to me. You are just another reminder in this god-forsaken town -another reminder of what I lost."

"If it helps, I'm leaving. To California," he offered helpfully. "I have nothing keeping me here anymore. Luke was it. And now that he's gone..."

"Now that he's gone you can go on and live the pathetic little dream of yours. The dream that fucked up your relationship. Good." Reid's side hurt all of a sudden. He grabbed the medicine handle, mercifully pushing it, and internally sighing as he felt the rush of morphine shoot through his body.

"What are you going to do next?" Noah asked.

"The first thing I'm going to do when I get out of this hospital is take a long, hot shower and take a long nap. Then, I'm getting the hell out of dodge."

Noah shook his head, clearly confused. "The neuro wing-"

"The neuro wing will be fine without me."

"You can't leave! The neuro wing is your baby! Luke's baby! How do you think he'd feel if he knew you were giving up?" Noah was angry, Reid noticed. Normally Noah's rants agitated Reid but right now, he simply was annoyed. He wanted Noah to leave. He wanted to surrender to the bliss the morphine was giving him.

"I'm not having this discussion with you, Mr. Mayer. It's none of your business what I do or do not do. And it's not your place to presume how Luke would feel." Reid's head started to swim, the surrender starting to take place. "Now, if you don't mind, I'd like you to leave."

Noah, with a pained look on his face, started, "But you-"

"Don't make me call security! Get. Out." He sank back into his pillow, closing his eyes. He heard Noah shuffling towards the door, heard Noah tell him not to let Luke down, and happily slipped into unconsciousness the second the door closed behind Noah Mayer.

-
Reid woke up hours later, his room dark. At some point, a nurse had come in and turned off the TV and shut the blinds. The only light on was from the machines he was currently hooked up to. He stared at the darken ceiling, letting his mind fall back to the past 48 hours. He felt hot tears stream down his cheeks but did nothing to wipe them away. The reality of everything that had happened was sinking in. How he had told Luke he loved him. How Luke insisted on coming with him to Bay City. How Luke insisted that he get out of the car to save himself. How he held Luke in his arms as they waited for the train. How Luke looked, broken, in the hospital bed. How Luke looked as he was wheeled away, brain dead. The tears streamed faster and his body started to shake as the tears turned into sobs. He let out a gasp as his body was racked with tears. "God, Luke, why. Why. Luke please come back to me, please." He sobbed loudly now, not caring if anyone outside could hear him.

Someone apparently had heard him as his door was flung open, blinding his tear-filled eyes with the bright light of the hallway.

"Reid? Reid?! What's wrong, I'm here, Reid. I'm here."

The next thing Reid knew, Luke was enveloping him into his arms.