Five days from the day of Saint Nicholas the boys were standing in the room as she worked diligently wrapping gifts for her family, shiny paper crinkling and tape snapping as she slid the presents into packing boxes with seventeen years' worth of practiced precision. The UPS packaging was plain, concealing the colorful packages within as they were taped up and put in a pile to the side, a pile that almost reached Sasori's head.
"How fucking big is your family?" Hidan asked, giving the pile a dubious look. The brown haired girl hid a grin, folding the corners down and pressing tape on her sisters new X-Box controller.
"Sorry," she apologized, "I don't think I was very clear. When I said family I meant everyone I love. So my parents, and sister, as well as my friends and their families. Which gives me this," she gestured to the mounting pile of small and large presents. "I also have my older sister, brother in law, nieces, cousins, second cousins, and first cousins once removed. And my grandparents, aunts, uncles, boss, co-workers, and professors."
They were staring at her and she shrugged. She had a large family, one that she loved dearly. She also had a horde of gifts for the boys in front of her stocked up in the attic that only Itachi knew about. And he didn't know about what she had for him, she had made sure of that.
"Okay," she stood up, finally finished, "Who wants to help me get this shit to the post office?" the post office was on the other side of town, and hse was using her grandfather's truck to get everything there. Suddenly the room was empty and she was cursing every ninja bone in their bodies.
Four days from the big one Sophie had sent out what few presents she planned to give her still-speaking-with-her family members as well as her college friends. She had waited up until then to go look for presents for her house mates. What they would want she was only just beginning to think of. So she grabbed her lanyard and walked into the living room, looking around until she found the person she needed.
"Konan," the bluenette looked over at the younger woman from where she was folding a flower out of paper, amber eyes slightly more expressive than they had been upon their first meeting, "I'm going shopping, you wanna come?"
The two made their way to her car, down the pass, and spent the rest of the day picking out what they would need.
"You don't need to do this," Konan said, watching Sophie paw through shirts until she found a white one with a skull like pattern on it, for Hidan of course.
"Of course I do," she replied, checking the price a grinning at the tag, "You guys are my friends, and like Shells says, the blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb."
The older woman shook her head and went back to the rack, pulling off a dark blue shirt she thought felt soft. Sophie took note of the attention she paid and set it under the rest of the presents once the other wasn't looking.
Three days from the twenty fifth Ginny appeared again. She came by now and again to play with the dogs, and this time it was just a quick visit before she and her husband took off to see her dad in Cripple Creek. Her cousin opened the door, looking surprised as she let her in.
"Gin," the other brown haired girl let the elder in, glancing behind her at the living room and giving a shout that 'Ginny's here'. There was movement and then Sophie came out, followed by the nearly full grown Shiloh at her heals.
"Hey there," she crooned, crouching down by the puppy and scratching him behind the ears. The excitable canine barked and started running around, circling her rapidly before tripping over his own paws and skidding across the wood floor. The older cousin, forty years old but still acting young, laughed and picked him up, tossing his ears around. Shelly looked on, focusing on keeping her face smooth.
"Aren't you just adorable?" Ginny continued, and Shelly watched in horror as she lifted the dog up and planted a kiss on his muzzle. There was a crack like gunshot and smoke filled the air. A blur of black and grey shot into the room and when the smoke cleared Tobi was on the ground, curled out of view and Itachi was crouched in front of Ginny, eyes glowing red. Her cousin sat still, eyes far away and lost as the room filled with ninja. Zetsu had thought ahead and brought in a blanket to toss over Obito, who ducked his head under it.
"What's wrong with her?" she was pretty sure she knew, but Shelly wanted to make sure no damage was being done to her favorite cousin.
"She's under a Genjutsu," Nagato replied, and the girl sent him a strange look and he sighed, "an illusion. She won't be hurt."
Shelly nodded and straightened up, looking over at the flailing, Japanese talking man in the corner. His arm hit the antique ice box and he yelped, yanking his arm back.
"Can' you see from there?" Shelly asked, and the covered man looked at her, or she assumed he did at least.
"Tobi needs a mask!" he shouted, and the girl cringed at the volume, shrinking away. Sophie walked closer, slipping past the ninja to poke Ginny on the cheek. She stayed still.
"If that's it I've got a bunch," Shelly stated, and the other looked at her in surprise. She shrugged. "I collect them," she explained, and tapped Obito's shoulder to get his attention before pointing him to the laundry room and telling him that there was labeled box in the crawl space. Once he was gone she went to get one of Itachi's outfits, wondering what this was going to change.
That night they watched old Disney movies; the Lion King, the Fox and the Hound, Finding Nemo, and Lilo and Stitch. The ninja humored them, though some of them actually paid attention. When they asked what the older adults thought the only one to respond was Kakuzu.
"Lilo's doll was the only character worth the money."
Two days before Christmas Ginny had been tricked into thinking nothing had happened, that there had been a small kitchen fire but everything was under control. The girls were reliving their childhoods, laying in pajama's and watching Christmas specials that outdated them from under thick blankets. Obito watched them from behind the mask that he had found in one of Shelly's boxes, a silver and orange, slightly feathered one she called Mardi Gras that covered everything but his mouth, which had been covered by a lower face cloth that she had had for reasons he didn't know.
The two were chattering and laughing over old Christmas stories, most of them Shelly's and all of them embarrassing. The tree winked in the corner, gifts stacked around and under it as the ninja milled around the house, some watching the show ("Why the fuck is that deer flying?" "who designed these things, hmm?") and others talking in the corner, some were reading and he was left acting hyper and chattering with the girls, bugging Deidara and bouncing around. The two didn't seem to know anything more than that vague 'I've heard stories about you' that neither one of them specified. It had apparently been years since they had heard them. All they had gotten was that supposedly Sasori got beat up by a pink haired lady and Itachi's brother was incredibly foolish. They also admitted that the Akatsuki were the antagonists.
Past that they didn't seem to know anything, or if they did they saw no need to share it. Obito stayed still, watching the two. They were at ease, completely and utterly. It was ridiculous. They knew that they weren't good people, but here they were laughing and sharing childhood stories with them. Were they that naive?
No, he doubted it. He had been there when the wars had aired on the history channel, listened to Shelly described the events. Neither of them had so much as flinched when death danced across the screen, when the total count of the atrocity was brought up. They even added in commentary and 'fun facts'. They knew war, this whole war seemed more aware than the one they had come from, and according to Sophie they had been studying wars and revolutions for the past nine years. It was very different from civilians in their world.
So why were they so comfortable? At last he decided that they were just not as smart as they acted.
The day came at last, snow piled high on the ground and presents stacked up around the tree. It glowed in light of the early morning and Shelly, who had somehow managed to slip out of her room without any of the ninja noticing, was already up, in the kitchen, with breakfast ready. It was the first time she was the first one up.
Sophie was the one that changed them back, no longer objecting to contact as she had only months earlier. They changed into their clothes and descended to the middle floor, staring stunned at the sudden increase in wrapped gifts under the tree. Shelly had plates of biscuits and gravy ready for all of them and it was hard for some to focus on breakfast.
"Why are there so many?" Sasori asked at last, eying the piles. The girls looked at him strangely, as if it should be obvious, but it was Konan who spoke up.
"They're for us," stunned looks were directed at the girls and they shrugged without saying anything. What was there to be said?
The more rowdy of the group were fidgeting and grilling the college students obsessively for what they were getting but the girls, who each had their own experience with younger sibling, were immune to the pestering when they put their minds to it.
Shelly tossed the dishes in the dish washer while Sophie lead the way to the living room, passing out presents. Everyone got at least two, one from each girl, with Shelly and Sophie getting more from their friends and family. When the amount of wrapped presents for the brunette was several times smaller than what she sent out she didn't seem to notice, or acted like she didn't care.
The two opened their gifts one by one, Shelly snapping pictures while Sophie objected, claiming she wasn't photogenic. It was regular, stereotypical presents. Gift cars, pajama's, shirts, and bits of jewelry, which revealed that Shelly collected rings and Sophie played the viola, and had somehow broken her bow at some point. Then they shoved presents at their new friends and demanded they be opened.
Obito made a show of opening his, ripping through paper and finding a regular mask that seemed to be based off of the description he had given them of his old one. He pretended to cheer and switched them faster than anyone could properly see. Then he had flung himself around the girls and knocked them both to the ground, listening to them laugh and try to push him off.
Then Hidan yanked them off and demanded his own gifts. The two rolled their eyes and each handed over a box. Sophie gave him the skeletal T-shirt and Shelly handed him a small key chain replica of his scythe. He didn't even thank them but hook the chain onto his jeans, changing his shirt without bothering with modesty. They took that as their thanks.
"Deidara," Shelly called, tossing him a box of medium sized box. He caught it, tearing it open and pulling out a small lighter. He looked at it in confusion before Sophie kicked him a large box and he opened that as well, laughing when he started pulling out an assortment of fireworks.
"I can make true art now un!" he was grinning widely at both civilian women. Before Sasori could start an argument he found two boxed shove in his face as well. He looked surprised before he opened one, from Sophie, and pulled out a small marionette no larger than a pencil.
"A puppet?" he asked, picking up the small thing and tugging at the cross control, tugging it around expertly.
"I thought you might like it," she said simply. Shelly's was a small book of poisonous animals and plants as well as a bottle of cyanide. Less personal but Sasori thanked them both anyway.
For Yahiko they gave him a small frog figurine from Sophie, an idea she got from Konan, and a white dove key chain from Shelly, inspired from when he mentioned his desire for peace. He grinned and thanked them, tucking the gifts away.
When it was Konan's turn Sophie handed over the shirt she had picked out and Shelly gave her a leather jacket.
Nagato looked dubiously at his wrapped boxes before tearing them open with more care than his reckless subordinates displayed. One was a small book without a label, Shelly's present, and the other was a familiar mug. He looked at Sophie, surprised, but she was already handing Kakuzu his.
The old man looked down and pulled open the plain boxes, arching a brow when he found a replica of Lilo's doll and a collection of ancient looking coins.
"You said she was the only character worth the money," Shelly reminded him, grinning like mad when he pulled the doll out. Sophie was in the corner cracking up with Hidan and Deidara, Tobi running around with his new mask on.
From they moved onto the ever stoic Uchiha who opened his presents with little fanfare. It was book on peace and poetry, one Shelly had seen him check out at least four times, and a crow feather on key chain.
"You didn't have to," he reminded them, but the girls smiled.
"If we didn't want to," Shelly told him, "we wouldn't have."
Zetsu was given a small potted cactus, courtesy of Shelly, and a pot of forget-me-nots from Sophie. White Zetsu thanked them while his other half asked if they could something to eat.
Kisame was the last to open his, finding a blanket that would cover even him with the words 'fish are friends, not food' embroidered on it. A snow globe from the Denver Aquarium, a shark floating inside of it.
"We couldn't really think of anything better," Shelly told him.
"Sorry," Sophie added, but his cheerful, albeit sharp grin alleviated their worries.
The day wound on lazily, snow drifting from the sky and down to earth while a mismatched family sat in a three story house, warm and safe.
