Shiki: Unrequited

I wake up the next morning with a start. Parts of me are cold, other parts are hot. I'm washed in sweat. Wait...? I'm in my room, and in a pair of boxers and a tank top shirt. Did... Did I dream all of that? I try to sit up, but I'm extremely weak and I feel a pain in my neck. Wha...? I press my fingers to my neck and my eyes open wide. No... No, I didn't dream it. I can feel the puncture wounds.

I drag myself out of my room and into the bathroom. Looking closely at the mirror, I can definitely see the wounds. If I go anywhere today, I'll have to keep it hidden. I can't tell Kaori and Akira I've been bitten. I stay home for the day and don't go out. Anemia, I believe that's what they called the first symptom. I stay in bed all day.

My mind continues to replay the scene with Tohru-Chan... No, the THING that looks like Tohru-Chan over and over. It sounded like him, it looked like him. Except for the hint of grave dirt, it even smelt like him. He used that same comforting tone he always used to make me feel safe. But that was not Tohru-Chan. Tohru-Chan was never that cold, he would have never acted that way. This thing never even smiled, once.

I feel so conflicted. Part of me wants to believe it's him, that he's come back to me. The rest of me is convinced it's some sort of cruel trick these things are playing. That maybe they can take the form of those we want to see the most. But if that's the case, then why was Shimizu there?

"That wasn't my Tohru-Chan," I tell myself, rolling on my side and curling into the fetal position. My body refuses to listen to the more sensible side of me. Stupid teenaged hormones! I roll back on my back and stair up at the ceiling. A trembling hand wraps around my neck, my fingers pressing against where he bit me. I close my eyes as my other hand wanders lower. Damn it all. I scold myself for giving in, but I can't fight what I'm about to do. I knew I had it bad, but I didn't realize I had it that bad. Tatsumi was right. I did get turned on by that last night. There must be something seriously wrong with me.

I'm feeling better the next day, I'm still weak, but able to move. I've had time to think. I stay home again, but make plans to meet Kaori and Akira later in the afternoon. I arrange to meet them on the public playground. As I wait, I begin to feel tired again, so I sit on one of the swings. My mind begins to wander again. I bite my lower lip to try and stop the tears. Feelings of hurt, betrayal, and loneliness all bubble to the surface as I sit there. I feel like my heart may never heal again. I know what I'm going to have to do, and I don't like it.

Kaori and Akira arrive. Apparently, they had been worried when they didn't hear from me yesterday. Akira tells me that the entire town had gone to Kanemasa as a mob, thinking the Kirishiki were responsible for what was happening, but that the father came out in the sunlight, and Ozaki-Sensei gave him a clean bill of health. His classmates laughed at him for trying to suggest the doctor was wrong. Kaori thinks it's possible the Kirishiki aren't the ones we're after. But after last night, I know better.

I never once look up at them. "I want the both of you to leave this village quickly," I tell them. "Run away, and leave as soon as possible." If I can't save Sotoba, I can at least save these two, right?

Akira refuses, but Kaori's quick. She catches on. "Something happened, didn't it, Natsuno?" she asks. She catches my collar and pulls it to the side. She gasps as she sees the twin fang marks.

"Yeah," I nod with a sigh. I don't want to admit it. I don't want to think about it. The one person I always believed I could trust, I could count on, and he's following them. I let him soften me, and now, I'm going to have to harden my heart all over again, or it may never fully heal. I drag Kaori and her brother to the bus stop and give them enough money for the fare to get them to the city. "They want to convert the entire Village," I tell them, "and they want me out of the way. I'll hear no more arguing. Both of you, get out of here, before they target you, too. Get on that bus and go. If what I've given you isn't enough, then call me!"

"Aren't you coming too?" they ask.

No. I can't leave while Tohru-Chan is still with them. I want to talk to him. Maybe I can finally be honest with him and convince him to leave with me. He didn't seem like he wanted to do this. I'm putting my life on the line, but that's the way it is. I smile at them. "I have something to do first. When I'm through, I'll catch up with you," I promise.

I'm still weak, but at least able to move. If he'd come last night as well, I might not even manage that. I return home, stuff the makeshift cross in my pocket, grab one of my dad's mallets, and fashion a stake from a spare piece of wood in the work shop. Then, I lie in wait. Why didn't he come last night? Is he feeling guilty?

I wait in the bushes, where Shimizu use to hide. I look over to my bedroom and suddenly understand why she took this spot, it's not only a great hiding spot, but a decent field of vision. Great, now I feel like some sort of weird pervert, staring at my own room. Why did I have to suddenly think of HER?

Ah...? There! The creature slips up to my window and leans against the wall. It raises its hand as though it's about to knock, then pauses. Even now, my heart and eyes betray my mind and body. I'm sensible enough to know this is not MY Tohru-Chan, no matter how much it looks like him. And yet...

It doesn't knock. It slumps and starts to walk away. I recall, I never actually felt I was looking at Tohru-Chan in that coffin, just an empty shell without a soul. But this thing appearing before me, not only looks like him, it's having second doubts about attacking me. Is it really...?

I stand up. "Are you looking for me?" I ask. It pauses, a look of surprise on it's face. "Tohru-Chan, I'm right here." I step out of the bushes.

"W... What are you...? You shouldn't be out here! You're safer inside," it exclaims.

"Am I? My parents have already invited you in, haven't they? How else did I wake up in my night clothes yesterday morning?" I inquire. "How did that feel, getting to change my clothes, by the way?" I'm fishing with that comment, I know that. If this is really the Tohru-Chan I know, his heart's set on Ritsu-Chan, not me.

He, no, IT turns its head. "You sound like you expected me to try something dirty. I did what I was told, to change you into your night clothes, so that your parents don't get suspicious finding you in the bed in the same clothes you had on during the day. There's nothing more to it than that. You're fifteen, Natsuno, and I'm kind of dead, there's all kinds of issues with that, you know."

I raise an irritated eyebrow. I'm two years over the legal age of consent according to the Japanese Constitution, what the hell does my age have to do with anything? "Tell me something?" I reach into my pocket and pull out a cross. "Does this thing really work?" The creature staggers backwards, a look of fear sweeping it's face. He digs his nails into the wall behind him, realizing I have him cornered. "Are you really afraid of something so simple as two pieces of wood in the shape of a giant 't', or were you afraid of such a symbol while you were alive, too? Can it be any charm? One of your comrades was afraid of a simple good luck charm Kaori had bought for Shimizu to wish her luck on her entrance exams. So I'm curious, just how effective is it?"

I watch as this simple item, make shift from two pieces of wood and some twine truly frightens him. I almost feel guilty waving it in his face. "Na-tsu-no..." it sobs.

I frown. It looks like him. It sounds like him, and NOW it's acting like him. "I TOLD YOU NOT TO CALL ME THAT!" I throw the cross at him, just barely missing his head. It hits the wall and breaks. Damn, I've really got to stop throwing stuff at these guys. I turn and run. No, if it were just a creature that was working for them in the form of Tohru-Chan, it would have called me Yuuki. Very few people call me Natsuno, and none ever say it like THAT, no one, but him.

"Natsuno!" I hear his voice call after me. I look back to find that even though I had a good minute's start, he's caught up.

"Why are you doing this!?" I ask, not bothering to stop. "Why are you with them? Why are you coming after me?"

"Natsuno, I'm sorry! It's not what you think," he calls, "I don't want to hurt you. But if I don't, they'll send someone else instead."

"I could have lived with that!" I reply, "They could have sent anyone but you."

"Tatsumi chose me on purpose!" he explains, "He said if I didn't, they'd go after Aoi-Chan and Tamotsu next!" My eyes widen and look back over my shoulder.

"Why? Why can't you guys coexist with humans? Why not just stop attacking humans?" I ask.

"It's impossible!"

"Why? If you came out and explained things clearly, there's bound to be someone willing to give fresh blood, without being killed or turned! Won't the amount of blood return to normal after a few days? Why just humans, what about animals?"

"It doesn't work that way! Animal blood, we can do it, but it doesn't give us what we need as well as human blood does. You wouldn't understand." I look back to see it grabbing its stomach as it runs. "Just like humans killing animals is approved in society, we too approve of killing humans. At first, everyone is disgusted, afraid to bear the sin of killing people, afraid to receive punishment for replenishing themselves with the life of another. But once you realize there's no punishment, you get use to the guilt pretty soon." Guilt? Then he does wish there was a better way. "Aren't humans the same? They butcher pigs and cows and eat their meat bit by bit. It's changed, but basically the same thing."

"NO IT'S NOT!" I exclaim, whirling around to look at him. "There's no way to take just a single piece of meat from a pig without letting it suffer if you don't kill it! But humans give blood at blood banks and blood drives everyday. They have to eat to replenish after that, but it's proof it can be done!" I insist. "THEY are the ones telling you all of this." I stop and look at him, I feel the threat of tears sting my eyes, but at the moment, I could care less if he sees them flow or not. "Do you really think that way?"

He stops, placing his hands on his knees. "Yes," he says. I can hear hesitation in his voice, see the look in his eyes. He doesn't believe that way. He agrees with me, but he's too afraid to admit it.

I click my tongue and reach behind my back. "It can't be helped then. Even an animal struggles before it's death." I pull out my ace in the hole. I'd hoped so much I wouldn't have to turn to this. "If a cross works, then a wooden stake should, too!" I hold the stake, ready to drive it into his heart. My hands are trembling. Make your move, prove to me you're not the person you look like! "What are you waiting for? You want to kill me? Want to feast on my blood? You of all people should know I won't go down without a fight! You honestly believe there's no other way? Well, here I am, come at me!"

Fear sweeps his face again, and I feel my heart wrench and my stomach lurch. The guy I always turned to for comfort, the person I let pass through so many personal barriers, the love of my life, and I'm standing here, threatening to run a stake through his heart in exchange for the dagger that's destroyed my own.

He backs away, frightened as hell, and rightfully so, I suppose. "N...Natsuno..." he whimpers.

"STOP CALLING ME THAT!" I exclaim, tossing the stake and mallet onto the ground at my feet. "This is disgusting! Act more like a Vampire, not the guy I use to know, the guy you were when you were alive!"

"But I AM the guy you knew when I was alive," he argues. "Natsuno, I swear, I'm not doing this because I want too."

I tug at my collar, where his bite marks reside on my neck. "After what you did, you still dare to call me by my name?"

"I did what I did the other night to try and save you. Tatsumi would have killed you on the spot, and I know how you feel about Megumi-Chan."

"I would have fought either of them on their own," I say, sinking to my knees. I close my eyes, shake my head, and bury my face into my palms. "I wouldn't have hesitated if Shimizu came. She's put me through so much, and I'd never met Tatsumi before, I would have put all my strength into getting away from him." I peek over my finger tips. "It's not fair they chose you. I can't fight you. I l..." I stop. No, not like this. I can't tell him like this.

My eyes widen, as I see him wrap his arms around his stomach, as though he's starving. T-Tohru-Chan? "N-Natsuno..." he calls my name.

My eyes widen. He didn't come for me yesterday. "You're really hungry, aren't you?" I ask, rolling up my sleeve. He frowns at me and gives a quiet nod, taking a step back. "You didn't eat last night, did you?" I deduce as I stand up. He shakes his head.

"No," he admits. "I didn't come for you last night, and I refused to feed from anyone else. Natsuno, I understand if you hate me, but please believe I never wanted to hurt you. I did what I did the other night, to make sure they wouldn't attack. As long as you bare my fang marks, they see you as my prey and will only attack with my permission, or if something happens to me. But, I haven't eaten since, and Tatsumi-Kun realized I only took enough blood to knock you out, so he bled me as punishment. That's why I said you're safer inside."

My poor Tohru-Chan. "Fine," I say holding up my arm. "Then let this be my olive branch. If you're hungry, then come to me. I'll give it to you willingly, but to you and you alone! You and I know how to work things out together, Tohru-Chan. We can do anything together, we both know that! Drink now, and we'll figure out a plan. There's got to be another way." Tohru-Chan looks at me in shock. "We can leave this village together and find a place where Tatsumi and the others can't find us. We may even find someone who can help us."

Rather than coming toward me, he backs away. I notice a change slowly taking over, but I don't know what it is. "No, it can't be done!" he whimpers, turning away and covering his face. "No, Natsuno, don't ask this of me now... Stay back."

What's wrong with him? "Don't be like this. I'm trying to help you."

"It's impossible to run from Tatsumi-Kun," he whimpers, running his fingers through his hair.

"It's worth a try, isn't it?" I come closer. "Tohru-Chan, are you really that afraid? Sure, we may have to fight a few people to get out of here, and we'll have to hide you from the sunlight, but, it's worth the effort if we can find a way to prove them wrong, isn't it?" Tohru-Chan, please? I don't want to leave you to them. I don't want to leave without you. Can't you see I'm trying to help?

He shakes his head. "No!" he sobs, "It can't be done, Tatsumi-Kun is sadistic! He'll hunt us down and kill us for sure."

"Tohru-Chan, would you look at me, please?" I plead. "I can't believe you're so scared you won't try." I reach out and put my hand on his shoulder. "You've always been there for me. It's my turn to be there for you."

Tohru-Chan sniffles and shakes his head. "No, Natsuno," he whimpers again, "Get back. I'm not afraid of what they'll do to me. I'm afraid of what'll happen to you."

"T-Tohru-Chan...? But didn't you just say...?" I stagger back a moment at those words, my face flushing red. Something's wrong, really wrong. I could hear it in his voice just now.

Hey lets out a blood curdling cry and turns to face me. My eyes widen and I stagger in fright. The tears streaming down his cheeks, the red orbs glowing in his eyes, the way his face is twisted, the way his fangs are bared. THEY bled him and then he didn't feed, his hunger's gone unsatiated too long. I won't fight him, but I will run if given the chance. I take a step back, only to slip on an uneaten patch of grass. I look up, wide eyed as Tohru-Chan pounces on me.

I cry out as his fangs sink into my neck, slipping perfectly into place through the preexisting puncture wounds there from the other night. He's no where near as gentle this time. I squirm, and scream in pain. "T-oh-ru-Ch-an!" I force myself to call his name.

Tears fill my eyes as he drinks from me. I ball my hand into a fist and strike him as hard as I can on the back, hoping to bring him back to his senses. Between the preexisting anemia from the other night, and the new loss of blood, however, the blow isn't as strong as it needs to be. If he doesn't stop soon, he'll drink too much, and really will kill me. "Tohru-Chan...? St-ah-p," I gasp out in pain, trying to hit him again.

The red orbs in his eyes stop glowing and though he doesn't stop drinking, he becomes gentler as he realizes what he's doing. His icy cold tears begin to run down his face again, splashing onto my shirt. My fingers twist into the back of his shirt. I'm too weak to struggle any more. If he needs to drink more, I'll submit willingly.

"I'm sorry, Natsuno," he sobs as he pulls away. "I'm so sorry."

I try to wrap my arms around him tighter. "It's ok, Tohru-Chan," I tell him. "It's ok, it's not your fault." I try not to let him hear the sobs in my voice. "THEY did this to you. It's ok... I lo..." My vision blurs and I blink, once, twice, I can't will myself to finish that sentence, I don't have the strength to do so. I close my eyes once more and everything goes dark.

I don't know what time it is when I finally wake up. I vaguely remember opening my eyes long enough to tell Dad I was staying home from school again, before falling unconscious once more. Now that I'm more wide awake, I hear him arguing with someone at the door.

"Is Natsuno-Niichan in?"

Bloody hell! I force myself out of bed.

"Who are you?" Dad asks.

"I'm Tanaka Akira, and this is my sister Tanaka Kaori."

"We're friends of Natsuno-Kun's," Kaori's voice chimes in.

"I'm afraid Natsuno's not feeling well," Dad says, "And I never heard of you."

"We know he's not feeling well," Kaori says, "That's why we came to visit him. We were worried about his illness."

"It's not an illness," my father argues, "He's been having trouble sleeping ever since summer, I think he's just over tired."

I roll my eyes as I drag myself into the hallway. Always got to have an explanation for everything, don't you, Dad? "It's ok, Dad, you can let them in," I call, peeking around the corner.

"N-Natsuno?"

"Excuse us!" they exclaim, zipping into the house.

"Hey!?"

"It's alright," I explain, "I called and asked Kaori-Chan to get my assignments from my teachers. They won't be here long." It's a lie, but at least it's one he'll accept... I hope.

I lead them back to my room. I'm so weak I can't pull myself away from the wall to even walk. "Niichan!" Akira grabs hold of me. "Were you attacked again?" I hear his sister gasp.

No. It really was Tohru-Chan, and he was trying not to attack. If I admit I was bitten, they might try to... I heave a sigh as my vision goes black for a moment. "Why the hell did you two come back?"

They each link one of my arms around their shoulders and help me back to my bed. "We can't run away on our own," Akira argues.

"We're your friends, Natsuno, we were worried about you," Kaori said.

"You forced us on the bus, and after a few stops, we reached a relatives house within five hours, but we couldn't just let you face this on your own. Besides, we still had Mom and Dad to think about. They're not aware of these evil spirits come back to life!" Akira exposits. "We're the only ones who can save them."

"Add to that the fact that we've all lost someone important to us because of these monsters," Kaori throws in, "We can't just let you handle this alone." She reaches into a bag and pulls out a handful of charms. "Look, Natsuno, I used the money you gave us to buy these exorcism amulets and talismans at the shrine in Mizobechou. I'm not sure if they'll work on these evil spirits, but I think they might. Let me hang them in your room."

I slump back on the bed with an exhausted sigh. "I do not plan on waiting to die. I intend to escape this village." For a moment, I feel my strength recovering and my breathing returning to normal as they hang the charms.

"That's right, Niichan, leave this place!" Akira pleads.

"I've always thought about it," I admit to them, "Going back to the city. That's why I've been studying so hard for university entrance exams."

But, I can't leave him with them. If I run and he stays, who knows what they may do to him? Will they really go after Aoi-Chan and Tamo-Chan if he doesn't kill me? Will they really spare them if he does? I almost don't want them to put these wards up in my room. He can't come to me if they do.

"We'll all find a way out sooner or later," Aoi-Chan says, with a smile. They finish hanging the wards and leave.

Dad comes to the door a few moments later. At this point, I've tucked Tohru-Chan's bear under the covers so he can't see her. "Natsuno, how are you feeling?" He opens the door and freezes in what could almost be considered horror. "WHAT ARE THESE!?" Akira and Kaori went a bit over board, plastering even more charms across the room than I had done in my first attempt. I'm lying in the bed, too weak to prevent him from taking them down, like I know he will. My room looks like a damned shrine as the wards, charms, and crosses cover the bed, the drapes, the wall, the floor, the desk, nearly any free surface has been covered. It's a little creepy in a way, yet, I already feel some of my strength coming back. Maybe I should have just kept a clove of garlic hidden under the bed where he can't find it? "This is absurd. The villagers' superstitions are too much, Epidemic, Revival, Evil Spirits? I've had enough!" As expected, Dad rips every one of them down, and forbids me to ever see either of them again.

Tohru-Chan doesn't come. Maybe he's feeling guilty again? Maybe he's trying to give me a chance to recover. But, my heart has been broken too many times. I've put too much stress on myself fretting over the exams to get away from this village and out from under my parents' guardianship. These walking corpses that feed on humans have only added to the damage I was already doing to myself. I'm so weak I can barely open my eyes the next day.

Kaori and Akira return to check on me. I can't open my eyes to speak to them, but I can hear them. "Where are all the charms we put up yesterday?" Akira asks.

"Oh no, look at him!" Kaori gasps.

"He's gotten worse," Akira says.

"Just like Megumi-Chan," Kaori sobs, "becoming more and more weak, and upon reaching this state... The next day he will..."

"No! He can't!" Akira exclaims. "Niichan won't die that easily!"

"You're right about two things," my father's voice interjects. "He won't die that easily, and he's getting worse. So you can both leave, now."

"But, we really wanted to speak with him," Kaori protests.

"How can you talk with him when he's in that condition?" Dad argues, "He can't even open his eyes. And take this back! If you wish to ever come here again, don't bring such weird things into this house."

I can hear the fear in Kaori's voice as she asks it, "Please... Please let us look after him!"

"What?" my father asks in surprise.

"Tonight, can you let us sit at his bedside and watch over him, please? We promise not to cause any trouble for the family," Kaori pleads.

"PLEASE!" they both exclaim.

Dad orders them out, insisting he and Mother can look after me on their own. Yeah? Good job so far, Dad. You don't even know what you're dealing with! Akira refuses, and begins arguing with him. I've got to admit, I've always admired the kid's courage.

"FINE, I WON'T BEG ANYMORE!" Akira exclaims, "BUT YOU KEEP THIS IN MIND, WE'RE THE ONLY ONES WHO KNOW HOW TO SAVE HIM! IF YOU KEEP PUSHING THINGS AWAY, TONIGHT, NIICHAN WILL BE ATTACKED AGAIN AND DIE!"

"AKIRA! Don't say that!" Kaori scolds him.

"I'm telling you, it's the evil spirits that have revived. Something that looks like someone who was close to Niichan has done this to him!" Akira sobs. I flinch, but still can't react. How the hell does he know that? I never told them who it was. "But you're a hindrance! You're killing Niichan with your own hands!"

"Akira, that's enough!" Kaori exclaims, "Come on, we're leaving!" My door slams shut.

Dad stands in my room dumbfounded. Got to give points to Akira on that one, I don't think anyone's ever managed that before. Finally, I hear him thinking out loud, "Those two kids might have over heard about that crazy mystic Itou Ikumi who caused the mob to run to Kanemasa accusing the Kirishiki of being 'Evil Spirits Revived'. Those poor superstitious village kids naively that it's real. How silly of me to handle things like a child."

Dad, you're an idiot! I hear the door to my room creak open, then click shut. I'm doomed.

It's later on into the afternoon. The dark settles in and I can sense the movement in the trees. Tohru-Chan's come back. A cold sweat rushes over my body as I force my eyes open. This damned anemia, I can't even force myself to sit up. I hear the door open and turn my head. "Dad...?" I call to him in a weak, tired voice.

"I'm sorry, did I wake you?" he asks, entering the room.

I shake my head. "I'm feeling a bit stuffy. Could you... open the window so I can get a bit of a breeze?"

"Sure," he agrees, unlocking and opening the window. "How are you feeling?"

"Just fine," I lie with a smile.

"It might just be a mental issue," Dad sighs, walking over and placing a hand on my forehead. "Do you want me to take you to the hospital?" No! This is my last chance to talk to Tohru-Chan. I can't... "They might give you some medication or something."

"It'd be the same as drinking some of your White Horse Whiskey, right?" a ask with a bit of a laugh.

"Well, I see you're feeling well enough to make jokes," Dad says, putting his hands on his hips. "Don't get so full of yourself! I'll come in to check on you from time to time, ok?" I nod and he leaves.

I turn my eyes back to the window. I can see him there now. I wish I could force my body to move. I may never make it out of Sotoba, but tonight, if I could just reach the National Highway, I'd run south without a second thought, and go as far as I could.

Tohru-Chan comes to the window, a frown on his face, the tears already streaming down his face. "You'd better do it quick, or my father may come in and catch you. I would come to you if I could. But, every inch of my body feels weak and powerless. It feels as though I've lost all of my limbs. I can't even sit up on my own."

Tohru-Chan quietly slips through the window. Even now, I still find myself hoping Tohru-Chan will change his mind and join us. If I can't leave with him, then there's no point in leaving at all.

"Oh, Natsuno," he sobs my name as he sits on my bedside. He ruffles his hand through my hair. "I'm so sorry. Can you ever forgive me for doing this to you?"

"I can't... talk you into leaving with me... Can I?" I ask. My voice is weak and strained.

Tohru-Chan shakes his head. "No. Oh, I wish it were possible, Natsuno, but it can't be done." He strokes a hand down my cheek. "The results would be the same."

I close my eyes and force back the sob that wants to escape my throat. "T-Toh-Tohru-Chan," I gasp, "H-Help me sit up, please?" Tohru-Chan nods and helps me sit upright.

"I'm so sorry," he whispers.

I look at him for a moment. "It's fine," I say, my fingers twisting into the long sleeves of the button up he's wearing. I can barely feel him within my grasp. "To-hru-Chan. W-what did you mean, when you said you were a-fraid of what would ha-happen to me, if you ran?" Damn it, I'm so weak at this point, I'm struggling to just get out full sentences! "D-idn't you say they wouldn't touch me, as long as I h-ad your mark?" I force my left hand to the puncture wounds on my neck.

Tohru-Chan nods. "Unless invited... Or something happens to me. That's why you were safer to stay in here and revoke the invitation that allowed me inside," he explained, "However, if they see me a traitor, should they send some one after me, then my mark won't protect you. You'd be fair game. I didn't want someone else to do this to you. I thought it'd be easier for you if it were someone you know." He closes his eyes and sobs. "I had hoped I could prolong it, drink a little at a time, and convince them you were gone. But, Tatsumi-Kun bled me out that first night. The next time I saw you, I was starved. I couldn't help myself."

I force my left hand to his cheek and gently caress it. I know he's cold as ice to the touch, but at the moment, I'm so numb it doesn't phase me. "Tohru-Chan," I call his name gently. "My offer still stands. Leave with me, Kaori, and Akira. I'll even talk to Aoi-Chan and Tamo-Chan if you like, the six of us can leave and fight any that come after us."

"No!" he exclaims, "I don't want them to see me like this!" He shakes his head and wraps his arms around himself. "I don't like what I've become, Natsuno. If you rise up as one of us, you'll hate me for doing this to you. If I can protect Aoi-Chan and Tamotsu from the shadows, that's one thing, but I don't want them to know me like this."

I give an exasperated sigh. "FINE!" I snip, looking away from him. "I always had the feeling I'd never get out of this place."

"N-Natsuno...?" Tohru-Chan gasps. The tears start flowing down his cheeks again.

This is my last chance. I force myself to move. Tohru-Chan blinks as I throw my arms around him. I nuzzle my face into his shoulder. "Tohru-Chan, you idiot!" I sob. "I won't run without you." I tighten my hold on him. "I don't want anyone else to do this."

"Natsuno..." he hesitates, but wraps his arms around me, a gentle hand strokes through my hair. I feel his icy cold tears splashing onto my face and shoulders. He trembles a little and I hear a slight moan come from him.

"You're hungry, aren't you?" I ask. "It's ok, Tohru-Chan. Do it, if you must. But... I have a favor to ask you. A dying request."

"What is it, Natsuno?"

"I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared. I've always known I was safe with you, but even with you, right now, I'm scared." My hold on him tightens. "Promise me...? Promise you'll stay with me until I take my last breath? That I won't die here alone."

I feel him tighten his hold around me. "I promise," he whispers.

I close my eyes and tilt my head. "Just one more thing...? Don't let me fall unconscious before you pull away?" A curious look sweeps his face, but he nods. Gently he leans in toward my neck. I gasp and twitch as he bites down on my neck for what would be the final time. His fangs slip back in through the preexisting puncture wounds and I feel him begin to suck my blood. I turn my eyes to look at him. I no longer find this scene as terrifying as I had the first time. But if he keeps his word and pulls away in time, I won't die with any regrets. I always believed in living my life where I won't die with any regrets. I did everything I could to try and save Kaori and Akira. I only have one thing left to do before I die.

I feel myself growing weaker, my hold on Tohru-Chan begins to slip. I can no longer hold back the tears that I've been fighting all summer. "T-Tohru-Chan," I call his name. We both know he's drank enough there's no way I'll survive the night. I understand not wanting to make me suffer, but there's one last thing I have to do before I die. It's unfair to him to do it now, but it has to be done.

"N-Natsu-no..." he whines as he pulls away from my neck.

I force my trembling hands up to his face and caress his cheeks. Pulling him close, I force my lips against his for my first and last kiss. Tohru-Chan freezes in place in shock, but doesn't fight me as my tongue enters his mouth. I can taste my blood on him, but I don't care. This taste, and Tohru-Chan's icy cold tears are all I have to prove this isn't some lucid fever dream. I have to do this, not for him, but for myself. I stay as long as I can until the need to breath forces me to pull away.

"N-Natsuno, why did you...?" he asks, placing a hand to his lips.

"Idiot," I sigh. "I've done everything to try and save you." I press my head against his chest, as I'm too weak to hold myself upright any more. "I'm sorry, I know it's unfair to you to do this now," I sob. "But... I can already feel myself dying." My breathing's becoming labored, my heart beat slower. My body aches. I close my eyes, my tears rolling down my cheeks and onto his shirt. "I'm sorry, Tohru-Chan. Forgive me. I love you." With that, I close my eyes and take my final breath.