While waiting for Elizabeth to return he turned his attention to the baby he had come to love as his own child and sat in a chair next to her, humming softly to her, letting her catch his hands then pull a finger into her mouth to work it on her swollen gums where a new tooth would be trying to push through soon. He felt the sharp little bite of her teeth and wondered how any of this could not be real. This illusion was amazing, how it gave them most everything they needed or wanted, a loving family, a wonderful home. Some people would be awfully tempted to just accept what had happened and stay. John thought if that would be such a bad idea, if he and Elizabeth gave in to it all, try and live with the kids with what they had here. He could do that if it meant they could be together.
This was his line of thought as Elizabeth led the boys down the stairs and out into the strange room and now, looking over his family he didn't know if he would be able to leave them.
"Wow dad, did you really find that room upstairs?" Derrel inquired as he came over to stand near John.
John nodded, seeing the impressed look in the boy's eyes. "Yes."
"Wow," he said again. "Even we didn't find something that good."
Elizabeth doubted that for some reason. She pulled out a chair for Derrel while Tobis climbed up into John's lap. John held on to him tight, the younger boy hugging him back. Elizabeth crouched down holding onto Derrel's chair to steady herself as she came down to his level. "Boys, we have to have a little talk with you about something really important, and we'd like you to be honest with us if you know anything."
"Are we in trouble?" Derrel asked her, signs of worry on his face.
"Yeah, because we didn't mean to break the big flower pot outside, it was an accident when we were playing football, and it wasn't really our fault--"
"No, its all right, nobody is in trouble." Elizabeth couldn't help but smile at Tobis' confession, she already knew about the big crack in the ceramic pot. The day before she had heard the boy's playful chatter abruptly go quiet and had discovered them as they tried to repair the damage with their Play-Doh, then drag the pot to face the wall, hiding their crime. Their actions had made her laugh and she was very impressed with their efforts to fix it, so she let them think they had gotten away with it. "We'd like to talk about why we're all here. Okay?"
There were nods from both of them. Where was she supposed to start this conversation? She sighed, taking a look at John. He still had a secure grip on Tobis but his eyes were glassy, staring out into nothingness. He looked so sad right then, holding on to the young boy like he was the last connection to the happiness they had all shared for such a short time.
"Do you mean why you wanted to leave our new house mom?" Tobis asked suddenly.
"They still want to leave." Derrel told his brother.
"Why? Don't you like it here?"
Okay, she would have approached the subject a little more gently but this was as good a place as any to start. "We like the house fine, it's just, we like where we lived before."
"But we weren't together before," Tobis said sadly.
"If we go back there you won't be our mom and dad anymore. We like it here. Going back means we won't see each other anymore."
"Well of course we'll see each other." Elizabeth reached out to both boys to rub their arms, she was starting to get the picture here. "If we can go back to the other place, we can all be together if that's what you want."
They didn't look at all convinced, so she tried something else. "You two seem to know a lot about this place, do you know how we got here?"
"We're here because something bad happened in the other place." Derrel tried to explain. "I remember being in the cave..."
"Then it was dark, but we could see shapes..." Tobis continued.
"We could touch the shapes and make things from them," Derrel went on again. "When it started to get lighter again we could see what we had made."
"You mean the house?" Elizabeth asked.
The boys nodded.
It was what she had expected to hear, but to have it confirmed was truly amazing. The boys were responsible for them all being here, the house was something they had created from their minds and had made them all a family. She supposed it made sense really, the boys were orphaned and if there was anything they could have wanted in their lives it would have been loving parents and somewhere safe to call home. That explained what they were doing here, and why they couldn't seem to leave. The boys had said as much themselves, they didn't want to. "What about the room upstairs? What's it's purpose?"
Both boys seem reluctant to give her an explanation. Tobis was looking up at his big brother now, a pleading look in his eyes that Elizabeth or John would have found impossible to resist. Derrel held his gaze though until the younger boy blinked then gave the tiniest of nods. Apparently in their private communication they had come to some kind of agreement.
Derrel finally looked back to Elizabeth. "You promise we can still be together if we go back to the other place?"
She had hoped to confer with John first before she made any promises that would involve the two of them, but nothing short of physically shaking him out of the trance he was in would provoke a response. "If we can get back the other place and its still something you both want, we will speak with your people and ask their permission for you to stay with us." Spoken like a true diplomat. Always leave an out clause.
The boys seemed to hold a silent conversation between themselves again, then came to their feet. Tobis got down from John's knee "The room upstairs is a warning, it lets you know if you get too close, so you don't leave by accident," He began to explain."When you first arrive here, there is time to decide if you wish to remain, but once that time expires, you wouldn't be able to find a way out."
Getting instructions on the afterlife from a five year old boy would probably have been a little more disturbing, that is, if they had not been in the afterlife at the time. "So, you're saying we must still be alive if we've got the chance to leave here?" Elizabeth asked.
Both the boys shrugged when she looked at them. She would have liked a bit more reassurance on the probability of them coming away from unscathed, but it didn't appear she would get it.
Tobis started to make his way round to the locked kitchen door, "We have to go out this way." He reached out, took hold of the knob in his small hand and doing what all of John's strength couldn't, opened the kitchen door.
Elizabeth shielded her eyes as daylight came flooding in through the open door, outside the windows the world was still the same dark night it had been a moment ago. Before she could say a word, Tobis crossed the threshold his small form swallowed by the light and she staggered forward crying out his name, the sudden loss of his presence in this little world was like having the oxygen sucked out of the room.
Derrel had picked up Aleena out of her high chair and held her at an awkward angle against his side, his arms still too small to hold her comfortably, as he too started towards the door. Stopping before he followed his brother, he turned back to Elizabeth and John, "You must both step through the doorway. I don't think you two will be allowed to stay here much longer now we have started our journey back to the other place."
Looking at the small boy who had made them believe he was their son, Elizabeth recognised a change in his young features, she could see a wisdom there that was beyond anything she could hope to comprehend in her lifetime. Derrel inclined his head slightly to the room behind them then stepped through the door, Aleena still in his arms.
The pressure on her lungs increased again making it harder still to draw a good breath. She turned then to see where Derrel had indicated and to her horror discovered the far end of the room had started to disappear. A darkness, something so much more than just the absence of light had poured in from the pantry and was slowly inching its way closer and closer to them. If it were true and the children were responsible for building the world they were living in, she had no doubt that now they had gone this place would no longer support her and John's existence.
"John!" Elizabeth reached out and grabbed his shoulder shaking him back to awareness. He was beginning to worry her, he hadn't moved since she had brought the boys down here. "John, come on, we have to leave now," she told him as calmly as she could.
Finally stirring from wherever his mind had taken him, he looked at her. "Why?"
"John please, there isn't a lot of time right now." She took his hand and he let her pull him reluctantly to his feet. The room was loosing space faster now as she led him to the door.
With just a precious few feet to go John stopped withdrawing his hand from Elizabeth's grasp. "Wait." While she had been talking to the boys, trying to convince them to take them back to the real world, he had been thinking. Thinking about them, the life they had been living, the children and about how all of that would be gone again if they ever made it back to Atlantis. In his time alone in here during the afternoon, he had managed to piece together what was happening to them and the part of him that was Colonel Sheppard demanded they find a solution and get back to the place they belonged. Though now the moment of truth had arrived he wasn't sure he really wanted to leave at all. What more could he want from life than this little family and all it gave him?
"Wait?" She asked, and incredulous expression on her face, "John we have to go now!"
"I don't know if I want to go back to that life Elizabeth. What we have here, why would we want to leave?"
"John, this isn't living. It may have seemed like it for a while, but we can't stay here." She nervously eyed the void engulfing the room behind him. There wasn't much time left now. "There is nothing to stay for anymore." She gently turned him back to face the room so he could see for himself what was left of their world.
John didn't want to believe her but his eyes widened at what he saw, there was no more than six feet between them and whatever it was. Okay, he was convinced, it was definitely time to go. He started them towards the door again but at the last second stopped again, "Wait!"
"John!"
"Just a second, I have to ask you something."
"Can't it wait?"
"No, it has to be now. We might not even remember any of what's happened to us. We might not survive at all." His hands came up and cupped her face. "You told the boys if we make it back we could still be together. What about us? If we somehow get back to our old lives, can we still be together?"
Elizabeth laid a hand against his cheek as her other arm snuck around his waist pulling him close. "Remember this," she breathed. Bringing her lips up to his, her kisses told him her answer. Just like the first night they were together here, she backed him through the door taking the last couple of steps together, guiding them back to the life that was waiting for them in the other place.
A/N: Okay, that's it. Thank you everyone for reading my fic! I know this probably isn't the ending some were expecting, but I didn't want to give a definite answer to what would happen to them. After all it is the afterlife and personally I haven't quite made up my mind on it either. This idea that, once you've stumbled and struggled through this life, you finally reach a place where you can control all the things you couldn't before just sounds very appealing. Hopefully though you've enjoyed reading it and for those of you who haven't decided what happens to us either, it's given you something to think about. Or maybe I'm asking for too much there! So, any feedback would of course be wonderful and if anyone wishes, I'd be happy to discuss their personal afterlife theories at my livejournal. Thanks.
