The next chapter has arrived! Sorry for the long wait everyone. There was scheduling issues with one of my beta readers but life gets hectic sometimes so no big deal there. Thanks for being patient and enjoy the chapter! R&R~
Morning regained its hold over the dimming city lights after many lengthy hours awake with restless commotion ensnaring those unaware. The air was humid, dripping with a near unseen blanket of haze to coat the backdrop of the lethargic landscape. The gloom in tow of the storm's route was nurtured by dangling hope of passing to awaken the missed sunlight. The days were spreading thin, the minutes adding up and the toll reigning over the placed time limit set in motion by one individual too blind to accept the battle he was facing. Jon was consumed in worry about the state Shawn would be in when they finally discovered where he's been residing, if he was still close by or took off elsewhere.
Walking the laid out path of tragedy would only lead to ruin, which his student has been blindly wandering. He didn't have any plans when he'd find him except making sure Shawn realized he wasn't as secluded as he felt. It was sheer design the mind built in attempt to shoulder struggles when casting view of those around to unreachable heights. Mending a life confined by loss and fear of losing more was almost an aiming effort for the foolish, but he wouldn't relinquish the effort, not when it came to someone who taught him how to commit to life's thrown chances of connection and unearthed purposes. Now he had to demonstrate the same lesson. Shawn was needed in the lives he touched. Ostracizing himself and running away wasn't a design flaw in personal perspective. It was nothing more than an inaudible request for help, one that wouldn't be masked by the pursuing clatter of ignorance.
The Centre was easily located in order to surface unknown traces to why Shawn's been acting irrational; recreating and establishing his own assurance to persuade those around that he was alright. This place was connected in some manner of speaking. It was the single structure of events unspoken between them for one misdirected reason or another. After entering the building, he spotted the man in charge with little trouble. "Are you Mr. Mack?" he asked upon approach.
The man turned away from the conversation he was in, abruptly ending it with siding concern as the others didn't seem to mind. "Yes, and what can I do for you? I haven't seen you here before." The other's appearance hinted some form of recollection but nothing significant enough to wager a guess.
"I came to talk to you about Shawn Hunter. I'm one of his teachers, Jonathan Turner. He was a member here a few months ago," he explained while swiftly surveying the area. He could recognize some teenagers from school, displaying the reach the influence spread, incidentally alerting Shawn's discovery of the forenamed refuge and how it could supposedly aid him in finding security when he was unsure of who he was meant to be.
"Ah, yes, Shawn. He was only here for a short while. I generally don't go into detail about any of my former followers, but there isn't much to say concerning his time here or his departure," Mr. Mack explained while taking a moment to place where he's heard the name. "You're the one who was in the motorcycle accident. He talked about you on occasion, mentioning something about how he came here due to your judgment of the way he was living his life."
The other was unaware of the minor details attached to the situational cause of seeking a retreat from self-asserted failure in the life of a confused teen to fall prey to influence. He wouldn't delve into the topic, not wanting to start an encircling dispute. "I know why he joined and whatever it has to do with me, I already took responsibility for that with Shawn after leaving the hospital." He bordered on the perplexing front presented to him with little succession but knew he was at least heard. It was the only reason his student questioned his own motives while living here and after parting ways.
Philip offered a slight nod to the discretion of word choice. "Well, on either case, I'm glad to see you've fully recovered. Shawn was pretty panicked when he asked me to come to the hospital with him that evening. I don't blame him. Anyone would feel constricted and in need of guidance when someone they know gets hurt. I was merely helping." He eluded more detail, knowing it could raise a problem. The overprotective type usually caused unresolved issue to flourish into argumentation. "So, what can I do for you exactly?"
"He didn't need the type of guidance you were offering," Jon stated, keeping his tone level. He folded his arms, allowing a pause to simmer. "I know you have your whole mind game set up with your followers, making them think they're lost enough to find this place as some form of sanction, but he was only here a few days. And you're not dealing with an impressionable kid. I want to know what made him come to you in the first place."
"As in me instead of you?" he questioned airily. It appeared many were against his efforts when they didn't fully understand that he was directing the lost souls of those abandoned by false connections to aid only he could offer. "This place served as a shelter for someone like Shawn, who felt unsure of his life. He was welcomed, wanted, when compared to life he previously lived outside these walls. He found what he needed to believe in. I was glad to assist him but it looks as if he didn't fully see what I was showing him in the end."
"No, you told him what to think, what to feel and played it off as some form of correction. You mapped out his life before he had the chance to start living it." He shook his head, running his fingers across his chin before taking a breath. This man was obviously experienced in manipulation to stand with many behind his actions and thoughts. Jon never imagined Shawn would wind up in such a place, but there was no denying the painted reality of the past. "If he didn't leave when he did, I would have taken him out of here myself. This wasn't where he belonged and a part of him knew that or he wouldn't have left."
Mr. Mack offered an insignificant smile, aware of the trivial amount of irritation slipping in the other's tenor. It was a common incident with those outside his perceptional insights and leadership. "Jonathan, it seems you have misplaced anger with me. It was Shawn who chose to stay of his own free will. And for now, he's still electing to wander around his life aimlessly."
"My anger isn't towards him or you." It was directed towards himself for not knowing what was bothering his student in the first place. Jon tilted his head a degree. The atmosphere presented a hospitable front. He could see why some would seek housing in its appealing effects. He wondered what caused the devoted members to stay but remembered it was pointless to set inquiry to this type of situation. "What do you mean by saying for now?" he asked, picking up on the detail.
"Shawn has endured a lot in his life, hasn't he? There's plenty of pressure from all of the negativity swarming his mindset with unattainable expectation and forced goals he's not sure he can handle. He's still lost like the rest of the children who haven't found a belief system. He's felt what it's like to be centered," he clarified, folding his hands, his voice left calm as usual. "No one truly leaves this place behind. Shawn's always been off balance with himself. I could see that the moment he walked in."
"Look, I get what you're trying to do with this place and whether I like it or not, I can't do anything about it." He learned that George had tried to shut the Centre down on many failed instances. It roped in a lot of determination, only to be turned down since nothing was illegal about the cult's process. "But understand that Shawn is never coming back here. He won't have to feel like he ever has to again."
"Now who's making a path for him? It's in his best interest to return, but it's not always a persuadable topic of discussion." Philip took a few steps back, meaning to bring this debate to a close. He had many others to speak with. "Shawn will do what he wants. You think you know him well enough so I'm sure you have some ability to imagine what might bring him back. It's not a huge loss if he does or not. There's plenty more out there just like him."
"I can't believe you still think you have a hold on him," Jon replied cuttingly. It was almost unbelievable to consider, but overlooked for lack of wanted continuation. "When he says he's done with someone… he's done…" His sentence trailed, remembering when those words were last spoken by the teen. They were furiously said to his father and in a roundabout way to him before this search had begun.
"I know I can't change your mind. It's already been molded, set to the world you live in. Society really holds no impact to those who have lost their way too long. I won't bother trying to help you see that you're wrong. You're free to think as you wish, as am I." He turned slightly before glancing back. "Is there anything else you'd like to ask?"
"You hardly answered my original question," he sighed lowly. It was a longshot but he needed to see what this place was about. Now he had a better idea and could find at least some underlying standing point of communication to start on. He shifted his gaze up after reconciling his objective. "What happened when he left?" Cory had explained most of the details but it wasn't a major topic of conversation amongst them.
He paused, recollecting the memory. "Nothing in particular. Not many adolescences leave this place by choice, but I could tell he left with enough forced conviction. I reminded him that he could always return whenever he needs to and his reply was simply acknowledging it. I'm surprised Shawn hadn't come here sooner though. When he was centered, he explained his conflicts with his wavering parental issues, his few friends, and teachers. He was and probably still is unstable, but we helped him detach from those internal disputes. There is a grade of serenity to find in leaving ties behind and embracing what it truly means to find happiness in those around." Mr. Mack gradually strode a few paces. "So, why come to me when you can ask him yourself?"
"I can't seem to do that if I don't know where he is," he ambiguously responded. "I should head out anyway. I don't want to waste too much of your time." The other was unmoving in his position to disclose any information involving a former member. It was all in his right to do so but wasn't an anticipated block.
"It's a shame," Philip unexpectedly said, projecting his view forward. "He switched his trust back and only wound up hurt. I told him to be wary of that happening. Since you were the one responsible for him finding this place, I wonder if you have the same involvement this time around. It seems he's rather attentive to your options, even more so than to mine."
"You're right," he agreed before he had the chance to leave. "Maybe I did have something to do with him joining, but I'm also the reason he left and that's fine. I know he's better off without people like you to control his life."
"How are you any different? Aren't you trying to bring Shawn over to your way of thinking?" He allowed the questioned to remain rhetorical as he went on. "You're judging him as much as ever. If you know anything about him, you'd know he doesn't respond well to that tactic."
Jon took a step back, leveling his gaze. "There's one major difference between me and you. I actually care about Shawn. You only see him as another mindless soldier. I won't need to come back here and neither will he, despite your way of thinking. Thanks for taking the time to talk out of your busy schedule. You were surprisingly more help than I thought you'd be." He left without sticking around to hear a reply.
A few weeks ago he couldn't distinguish what caused the disconnection he had with Shawn over the last few months. He'd notice how distant his student was becoming, having always backed away a few inches upon his approach if caught in conversation or how he would flee the scene without an uttered syllable between them. He should have known something more than minor routine issues were bothering him, an unseen detail deeply imprinted on his psyche that flourished from an appointed source. It wasn't simply the accident that caused this revelation, but the aftershock of an aspect he never even considered. Shawn felt abandoned by him once the news hit his ears. In the hospital room, beyond the requests and the mistake, Shawn was afraid to reconnect after witnessing the feel of almost losing a person he needed. It mirrored Chet's neglecting nature in a new light. Instead of moving on, he withdrew, thinking he instigated the mishap by getting close to someone. However, there was still a possible way to repair the damage done.
A single shaky breath was taken before alertness struck him, a jolt of awareness finding its way to his drowsy mind. Shawn opened his stinging eyes, blinking a few times to let his surroundings tie together to create focus. His head was pounding, a strong buzz reverberating throughout his skull the second he attempted to move an inch. He turned over on the couch, his damp clothes crafting an immediate chill. The exuberantly bright light was avoided instantly as his hand shielded his sight. The roaming sounds bounced back intensified. Catching a distancing view of the clock, he let out a prolonged exhale. He wanted to fall back asleep before his reality decided to cuff his desire of simply returning home, realizing that place no longer existed.
"Finally waking up?" Eddie asked off to the side, walking over. He'd been up for some time now after his friend had left a few hours prior.
"No," he muttered, placing his head back down in the cushion. His body mentally retaliated any form of movement. The rigorous pelting of oncoming rain could still be heard thrashing against the side of the building when dragged along by the wind. The noise was virtually masked by his absent grasp of concentration.
He leaned back against the opposite wall, crossing his arms. "First hangovers are always the worst. I told you to take it easy, should've stopped after the first two. But I let you do what you want."
"I don't really care," he mumbled into the couch. Noon was on the rise, but no indication from the lacking sun could distinguish the fact. He vaguely recalled stirring awake earlier in the morning, feeling sick to his stomach. The nausea persistently occurred as well as the daze trailing over him. The limit of sleep he had due to those symptoms was minimal at best. He was aware of the small amount he's received lately, knowing how much he craved for the simplicity. The sense of hunger came along but the idea of eating made him want to throw up again. At the moment, he only wanted to shut the world off.
The elder sighed, kicking the couch lightly to get the teen's vanished attention. "I'm going to head out and I'm just reminding you that this was a one night deal. That's how it works around here."
Shawn dared to look beyond the pillow his head was buried in, squinting to block the light. "I know… I can only stay if I help you or I'm out on the street again." It was typical enough. Wherever he went there was a price to uphold. Leaving the others was unquestionably the worst decision he's made, but he couldn't face anymore of the deafening panic he had when it came to relying on them. He could distinguish the sensation coursing through him, but he'd freeze up the moment his mind linked any form of commitment, no matter how minor, to his own reliance.
"Yeah, that was the one rule," he stated, digging his hand into his pocket. "And here's the cash I owe you for the help." He tossed the money to his brother.
"That's not thirty percent," the younger said, sluggishly convincing himself to sit up when he'd prefer to still be laying down. The action was regretted immensely as the room began to spin, his vision distorting shortly after. He placed his hand against his head, still feeling the smallest hint of warmth remaining. The headache added to the pressure he felt forming. "This is more like twenty or something."
"You tripped the alarm. That's a cut in your pay and you ran a little late when taking the cameras. Apparently, you're not as skilled as you thought. I saw it on the news this morning." He strolled over to the television and turned on the local channel. "They caught a glimpse of you, but luckily they didn't get your face. So, you're off the hook for now. I'd stay clear of the place for a while. And on top of that, I don't know who might be able to recognize you from the clip."
"Great," he breathed out, tilting his head back. His body felt numb to the tidbit of given information even though the significant fact was the last thing he needed to hear after recently waking up. This entire gamble rapidly glided beyond his control before he had the chance to realize what happened. The risk felt desirable, needed to fill the empty space he could never satisfy, but a part of him questioned how he let it happen at all. "I don't know if I want to hear the answer to this or not, but I'm going to ask anyway. What are you planning on doing next?"
Eddie grabbed his jacket on his way to the door. "I'm taking a little trip back to the trailer park to negotiate a deal. You can tag along if you want, but only if you can physically keep up. You look like someone beat you down."
"I'm fine," he replied, coercing himself to stand, fighting the striking vertigo. The words were an apparent lie, the sensation another poisonous trait he inherited when telling himself the evident falsehood. He felt the surge of rekindling the statement as a way to bargain with his own doubts about his current situation. "If I can't stay here, I don't have anything better to do. Besides, I wanted to head back there anyway." He followed his half-brother out, grabbing one of the beers left on the table. His thirst was incomprehensible, his judgment not caring that the drink would hinder his already pulsating indicators of being ill.
"Alright, but when we get there, I'm going to need you to remain out of the way. The guy only talks to me to ensure the safety of the information he's given," he explained when leaving the room. The cold wrapped itself around the two, swallowing them in an icy embrace once stepping outside. "You can do whatever else you want and I'll find you when I'm done, unless you change your mind before knowing the details."
His free hand ran over his arm in a failed attempt to find heat. His leather jacket was drenched, not able to serve its purpose. He dreaded going back out into the unpredictable weather. It felt endless when assuming he'd be stuck enduring it. "He seems pretty cautious about the whole transaction..." A part of him didn't want to chance figuring out why through plain inquiry. It seemed safer to leave out the particulars.
"Trust isn't necessarily given because it can be," he loosely simplified when reaching the sidewalk. Their destination was in walking distance, making driving unnecessary. He noticed how Shawn looked almost feverish, but he needed him for one more transaction. Afterwards, his brother was better off going back or roaming around. "You gotta work your way to the top around here. No one's going to do it for you."
"I know that feeling all too well," the younger replied. "I'd rather know what you're doing before agreeing to anything." As tired as he was, he needed to wake up and find something to do before his nerves overpowered his sense of logic. The risk was known but overlooked. If this was the life he was going to live, he might as well get used to it. His brain screamed that he was falling in too deep when reaching the ledge, that it was against everything he was taught by the handful of people who cared for him, but the warning signal was blocked, his navigation left free.
"You're either in or out no matter what it is," he said, opposite the other. He didn't need doubt getting in the way or else this couldn't be accomplished. "There's no second guessing. Take the risk or back out. Like I said before, it's all up to you."
Shawn rubbed his eyes after a few coughs left him. "Okay, fine. I'm in on whatever it is..."
Beyond the entrancing rainfall, the trailer park was immersed in a thick layer of unsolicited silence. It contained a flash of missing serenity to those drifting. Shawn decided to walk around after splitting ways with his brother for the time being. He was preoccupied with a hefty unneeded calamity of thoughts overshadowing his mind. He was mentally gripping onto the small strands of remorse to keep him slightly grounded, but it was a loose hold. It's only been a day and a half since the phone call but the hurting reminder was nothing new, only a childish desire to want what has already fled. Even the idea of leaving with the money he had acquired didn't sound appealing. He had nowhere else to go and the part of him that recognized the sensation would only deepen the frown etched onto his features. He needed to figure out his chaotic plan, but the sluggish feel of care to the predicament he placed himself in was fading.
He sighed when walked through a shallow puddle, the water overflowing and seeping further onto the dirt. His head was practically left spinning due to his need of sleep. It wouldn't come no matter the efforts he made. He assumed it was caused by the mounting stress he was saddled with. A part of him wanted to quit and head back the way he came, but he wasn't worth the trouble anymore.
The traveling sound of familiar voices sharply reached his ears, causing him to slow when the quality of their tenor was instantly recognized. He darted behind one of the trees within the property. The last thing he needed was to run into them now, especially when he was left unsure of his actions.
"Why did we come back out here?" Topanga asked with a tired expression. They were supposed to stay back and start discussing the best way to discover where Shawn's parents could potentially be. The task was proving difficult, tampered with the sporadic behaviors of the two they were to locate. Their unpredictability was uncanny when it came to their departing. "Mr. Turner told us to wait until he came back before leaving again. We're supposed to stay in groups."
"What? You don't call the two of us a group?" Cory asked, glancing back. "Turner went down to the Centre and who knows how long he's going to take to talk to that guy. I don't want to lose any time or miss passing Shawn if he's out here. And he has to be out here somewhere. I know he is…" After asking around the previous day, someone mildly mentioned that they witnessed Shawn disappearing from the trailer park an hour before they arrived. He had no doubt his friend would return. His instincts were well intact, only off the least bit.
"I know… I'm worried about him too, but I don't feel safe around here. With all the stories Shawn shared over the years, I think I have reason to be." It wasn't only tales that kept her guard up; it was the known facts weighing down her indecision. She wanted to find their friend as much as the others. However, she doubted he'd stay if he knew where to avoid. In spite of the falter, her verdict didn't waver.
Cory lowered his umbrella as the wind brashly blew past them. "I get what you're saying, but you got me here. I won't let anything happen to you," he promised, presenting the gesture to the best of his abilities when aware of her fears. "Besides, I've been here dozens of times, ever since Shawn and I became friends. So, I generally know where to avoid."
Topanga slowly nodded. "Generally isn't very specific… But like we said, whatever it takes." She had hoped they'd find him before the weekend had finished. Their luck was running out and it was all she had to keep in high spirits when the situation limited in disheartening hours. Shawn knew this section of Philadelphia, naming the streets his improvised backyard. He was well accustomed to being on his own travel when wanting to avoid any form of communication. The area was vast when taken into consideration. The chances were slimming down, cut at the hems of time as the minutes multiplied.
"Hey, look at this, outsiders traveling around like they live here," a guy said, walking over to them. He was exceptionally taller than Cory when standing near him and appeared to live within the area. "This isn't really the weather for sightseeing and not to mention, your kind doesn't really belong. What's a few middle class kids doing hanging around a trailer park?"
"We were just leaving," Cory replied quickly, taking a step back. He wanted to evade any form of trouble when none had to be mistakenly stirred. It wasn't in his nature to cause conflict and he rarely would place himself in a situation where he was sucked into it. Only by the company of his best friend, who commonly prompted the deceiving idea, he found it unavoidable at times. They were downtown, making eluding confrontation a challenging endeavor to start with. He then turned back towards Topanga, speaking in a low voice. "See, this is an example of a place to avoid."
"Whispering to your lovely lady friend? You mind if I get a word in?" he asked, pushing Cory aside. He had noticed her from the sidewalk when passing by and didn't know them from any previous meeting, deciding to intrude on their conversation.
"Actually, I'd rather you didn't," Topanga replied, her arms crossed, one hand stiffening against the handle of the slanted umbrella. The soft splashing of rain trickled off of the sloping side, past her calm expression and onto the damp earth. She'd prefer to avoid a problem as much as her boyfriend, but didn't like where this meeting was being directed. It made her apparently uncomfortable as she locked eyes with the other. "Come on, Cory, let's get out of here. We still have other places to check."
The guy placed his hand on her shoulder, stopping her from taking another step, running his palm down her arm. "I'm not crossing any lines here, now am I? I just want to talk. You can't take a second to let me get to know you? It's all innocent so you can ask your friend over there to stop shooting me that dagger look. He seems kind of harmless though."
Topanga pulled back a little, remaining in place, not intimidated to follow through with the action. "Really, we were just leaving," she repeated roundly, offering a composed voice. "We don't want to cause any problems. We're only looking for a friend of ours, but he's obviously not here, which means we shouldn't be either." Her foot slid back when he reached for her again.
Cory instantly had enough of the other imposing himself. He shoved the guy away from her, aware of the closing proximity he caused, but it was a minor detail promptly left ignored. "You touch my girlfriend again and I'll break your hand," he threatened. "Back off."
"So, the kid wants to play hero. Isn't that something new? You look more like the type to hightail it out of here the second you sniff out danger. That's not much to say when trying to protect your girl from me," he said, folding his arms over his chest. "But there's one thing privileged people like you don't understand around here. You find something you like, you take it no matter who it belongs to, and I just found myself a girl worth keeping for a night or two."
"I said back off," Cory defended angrily, shoving him again. The stranger was correct in assuming his habit of dodging any form of hostility, but this was a different situation altogether. In the past, when a similar predicament had occurred, Shawn helped him when Eddie threatened to beat him senseless for catching him on film stealing. He wasn't a fighter in any given definition of the word, but didn't back down from the pressured urge to start one. "You have to go through me to get to her and that's never going to happen."
"You don't know who you're messing with, kid," the guy said, punching Cory in the stomach and knocking him to the ground. "I don't take orders from some outsider, waltzing around like he owns the place. And on top of that, there are repercussions for such actions." He stood over him, a haughty expression on his face. "And surprisingly enough, I'm not in a generous mood right now."
"Cory, are you okay?" Topanga asked, rushing over to him. This event ultimately contributed to the sensed vulnerability the two left themselves in when arriving alone. The idea wasn't considered thoroughly. "Can you get up?" Her voice had dropped an octave when near his side. Before she had the chance to hear his reply, her wrist was grabbed, causing her motions to slow before turning to face him.
"How about you and I get out of here?" he asked, dragging her up. "I didn't hit him hard enough to break anything, so forget it." He began pulling her arm before she tried tearing away, weakening his grasp enough to gain some distance.
"Let go of me," she said sternly, his hand only gripping tighter around her arm. "Any guy who parades around treating women like a piece of property is the sorriest excuse of a human being I've ever seen. And another thing, if you think intimidation is supposed to scare him off or weaken me then you're mistaken." Her umbrella had been dropped in the brief struggle. The wind was becoming stronger, swiping her hair back alongside the gusts.
Cory stood up, his pants now covered in mud as he became drenched within the shower. The water running down his face went unnoticed. "You heard what she said. Let her go, or you deal with me. And I'm known to be pretty violent in the karate environment," he embellished, hoping it would buy him some needed time to think of some strategy to get the other away from Topanga without her getting hurt. He didn't care how injured he became as long as she was safe in the outcome.
He abruptly released her and knocked Cory back a few steps. "Why don't you stay down instead of playing the guard dog?" he asked tersely, taking a few paces towards him. "If you keep pushing it, the next hit will send you to the emergency room."
"Are we having a problem here?" Jon rushed over after catching the end of the small dispute's escalation. He had called the Matthews' house and found out that both the two had already gone out to begin searching. He turned his route back here, knowing this is where they'd return. "To me, and this is just from a distance, but it looks like some punk is messing with two of my students," he said, getting between the three of them. "And I don't think some random guy wants to do that. You see, I'm an adult who happens to have a problem with you now. So, if you don't want the police involved, I'd get out of here."
"Fine," he forcibly breathed out, not needing the cops drawn in over the minor quarrel. "If we happen to meet again, you're dead." He indicated towards Cory and proceeded to look to Topanga. "And you'll be single, which leaves just the two of us. Feel free to come back without the human shield anytime." He strode off, leaving the property. For lack of good timing, he had other places to be besides hanging around in any empty lot
"Yeah, you better run," Cory loudly called out. "I would've taken you down." The guy glanced back, causing him to sidestep behind Turner. "Or not. Whichever makes you happy." He brought his hands together, entwining his fingers before glancing back up at his teacher's disapproving look, offering a sheepish glance in return. "How ya doing?"
"I told you guys to wait for me," Jon sighed, shaking his head. "What happened to that?" His question went unanswered as none of them attempted to clarify their reason for taking on the task without him. "I get it. I'm just as worried as you, but you have to watch where you're going around here, Matthews. It's not safe. You of all people should know that." He wasn't angry at the decision, knowing where the cause came from.
Cory lowered his gaze, a patch of silence passing. "Yeah, I probably would have been pulverized if you didn't show up. And that wouldn't help when we're trying to find Shawn, if he's even going to make that possible at this rate," he said regretfully.
"You were very brave," Topanga replied, handing him his discarded umbrella. A chill was running over her skin after being exposed to the cold weather. She wouldn't deny her desire to go home to a warm house, but then remembered Shawn was still out here with nowhere to go. He's been in the turmoil of foul rain and a burdened conscience "But next time, don't try to start a fight. What were you thinking? He could have really hurt you."
He raised his head, taking hold of her free hand. "I'd apologize but I can't help it when the girl I love more than anything in the world gets treated like that by some jerk who doesn't have a clue."
She gave a soft smile. "Thank you," she said, giving him a quick kiss. He didn't need to physically fight for her to know he'd do anything to protect her since she would do the same for him in return, no matter the sacrifice. "Now, let's find Shawn. There's only a few more hours before it gets too dark."
"We're sticking together," Jon mentioned as they started walking. He had a feeling his student was also around someplace but the idea mattered little when he was still beyond reach. "Your parents haven't heard anything yet. They're still out while Eric's waiting by the phone again. Wandering around isn't doing us much good though."
"We'll find him," Cory proclaimed. "I don't care where he thinks he can hide from us, but it won't last forever. Shawn knows when he's gone too far even if he doesn't act like it. He'll come back home. He always does."
Shawn withdrew once he saw Jon arrive. If his teacher hadn't come when he did, he wouldn't have ignored his instinct to help a second longer. The moment the guy showed up his senses should've alerted him, but for some reason he couldn't force himself to take the initiative. His feet felt cemented to the waterlogged ground, his mind barely holding onto the image ahead of him. He wouldn't serve much help in his state. Once Turner arrived, he felt relieved to know they were going to be alright. He pressed his lips together when taking a step back. Seeing how much effort they were displaying only made the guilt fester. He shook his head. This wasn't an ideal time to mentally go astray.
His eyes locked in the direction the guy took off in. Shawn followed behind, deciding to do something after all. "Hey, Russell, can I talk to you for a second?" he asked after catching up. The two have met on occasion, seeing each other from one place to another since they both lived relatively in close vicinity of the two separate trailers. They never got along for more than one purpose behind the winded story of crossing paths.
"I didn't know you were still living here after your dad ditched you," he said when spinning around, recognizing the near unclear voice. "Looks like you've been hitting the alcohol pretty hard." He noticed the look right away. "That's not like you from what I hear, but a nice change. The good kid turning bad, I guess it makes sense, considering everything falling apart around you." He crossed his arms, his glare off to the side, seeing his comment being forcibly ignored. "What do you want?"
He seized the essential need to take on the argument, guiding his reply to his original objective. "Okay, you just made two big mistakes," he began, taking a stride forward, his tone riddled in irritation. "If you go near those two again, I swear, I'll knock your head off." Russell gave him a disbelieving look, the given caution silently shrugged off. "I'm not kidding. If you ever hurt Cory or even look at Topanga again, I'll make sure it's the last thing you do. Now get lost."
He scoffed, momentarily spreading his arms back, displaying the lack of intimidation. "You don't own the trailer park, Hunter. Better yet, why don't you get lost?" he replied, poking Shawn in the chest. "No one needs you. I can do whatever I want. You've got nothing but dead threats, just like always."
"You're probably right," Shawn agreed, giving a slight nod, his annoyance being pricked. "I don't have a single reason to still be here. But I keep my word, especially when you go after the people I care about. I don't think you understand the lengths I'd go for them. You touch them again, you're dead."
"Oh, yeah? You probably keep your promises as well as your dad does to you. Right, I forgot, he doesn't, and neither does your mom." Russell gave a small laugh as he started walking away, only slanting his head back to finish the statement. "You seem to keep making them run away, don't you? They never stick around for you and who could blame them. It's only a matter of time before those three realize the same thing. You're not worth it."
"Degrade me all you want, I've done it my whole life. But bringing in my parents, that was your final mistake," Shawn said, throwing the first punch, hitting the guy in the jaw. "I'm in a really bad mood, so if I were you, I'd go. You've never beaten me in a fight before and that's not going to change now."
"If you want to fight, Hunter, that's fine. I have some steam to blow off anyway," he challenged back.
Shawn leaned his head back against a wooden fence, the rain ignored as he closed his eyes. He raised his arm, taking another sip of the drink he had brought with him, after temporarily placing it aside before the conflict arose. Getting into a fight wasn't planned but he convinced Russell to leave with a bloody nose and a promise not to bother his friends. The bruise he received on his face in return, below his eye, was pulsating but a negligible detail in the results. He wished they'd stop in their pursuit to find him, but obviously they intended to keep going and he didn't want to chance them getting injured. He was left at another crossroad. What bothered him more was overhearing that Turner went down to the Centre. There was nothing to know about the time he spent there. It was a wasted effort on his and Jon's account.
He sighed heavily. There was a beast worse than anger gnawing at his chest. He was tired of not knowing what was going to happen or what he did to deserve this unpredictable, disconnected life. He couldn't get close to others, wouldn't accept a drop of happiness in his vast unknown submerging world. He could act the part of a carefree teenager for days on end, but there were times when everyone else would keep going and forget he was suffering.
Water was swiped from his face, smeared with the rest. "I'm doing it again… watching myself drown and not doing a single thing to stop it…" he said lowly, dropping the empty bottle aside. He glanced off, the sound of rain soothing to his ears for only a measly moment before the storm set in. "I don't even know why I'm still here. I should have left by now… But this is what you always do to me." He forced himself up unsteadily. "Why does a part of me still think you're coming back? Do I really need to feel disappointed to feel anything at all? This is why I never expect anything from you." He picked up the glass, anger rising in his voice. "You always lie. You always break your promises. And I'm always dumb enough to fall for them. Even when I say I'm done with you, I can't be and I don't understand why." The bottle was roughly thrown against the fence, shattering into pieces. "I hate myself for caring when you never do. I don't want to go back with the others to keep pretending I'm fine… when I can't be. It's not fair to them no matter what I do…"
He leaned forward, his fingers catching the rim of the railing. His energy was draining, leaving him exhausted. Shawn turned himself around. He was letting himself fall in too far and found he didn't have the strength to get out on his own anymore. Everyone knew he didn't handle being alone well and he wasn't proving anyone wrong.
Hope I kept Mr. Mack in character XD People that are only there for one episode can be a challenge. I also got a few requested scenes in this chapter, always a good thing. But Shawn isn't doing well! I've already started the next chapter so it shouldn't take as long to get that one posted. And thanks for all the wonderful reviews and your interest in this story! Keeps me going :)
