Lee was wolfing down bacon when they hurried to the Gryffindor table and slid down beside him. "Wha...you two're..seriously 'ate," he mumbled with bacon in his mouth.
"Either eat or talk, dumbshit," Fred said blithely. He was in better spirits since he was relieved that his angel of a twin has forgiven him.
"He's turned into Ron!" George added to the insult.
Lee gulped down his bacon and said, "If you go on insulting me then I'll go open Snape's office by myself and you two'll be left gawking when I walk away with a thousand galleons,"
"Oh, don't be so sure. You know you'll fail miserably without us," George said, heaping lamb chops on his plate.
"But we, generous, benevolent and refined gentlemen, always pull you out of the swamps you dive into," Fred said, his wicked grin identical to his twin's.
"Whatever," he swigged down the remainder of his pumpkin juice, and leaned closer to them with a thrilled expression, and whispered excitedly "Hey, have you guys ever heard of chloroform?"
"Coro-what?" George repeated blankly, blinking, as if Lee talked troll.
"Don't tell me you haven't heard of it! Your father is a muggle aficionado for Godric's sake!" Lee's excitement was building up.
"He's lost it," Fred said sorrowfully, shaking his head, and jabbed the roast potato into his mouth.
"So you two have no idea what it is?" Lee asked incredulously.
"You aren't making any sense, Lee," George said.
"I tell you its high time that he's carted off to St. Mungo's," Fred added.
"Shut up, bozo! Look here,"
Fred and George simultaneously turned their heads to what he covertly pulled out of his robes and held in his hand. It was a translucent vial half-filled with a clear liquid which appeared to be water.
"What? Water?" George said, looking at Lee as if he was dumb.
"Its chloroform, nutters, you must've heard of it from your dad! Its a muggle-made substance!"
"We don't hang around dad catching every word he prattles about muggles, dickhead," Fred said.
Lee continued on as if he did not hear him, brimming with excitement, "This beauty surpasses all the high level body-binding, knocking-out curses invented by the wizarding world. We'd be able to knock out the person we intend to without the slightest detection of magic or suspicion!"
At this, Fred's and George's eyes widened as one, slowly processing Lee's rambling, and a slow, sly smile stretched on their lips, "Wicked!", they both exclaimed together, and then looked at each other, smirking at their synchronized remark.
Lee explained on like a professor, "What I'm holding in my hand right now is a highly concentrated version of it, enough to knock out a person for hours, meaning we can conk Filch off and haha, filch the keys!"
"Blimey, I love you, Lee! You've proved that your skull is not filled with dung for the first time in your life!" George said.
"But how in Merlin's boxers did you get hold of this?" Fred said admiringly.
"My cousin's a muggle, nutters, remember the weirdo with silver things clipped to his lip who accompanied me to King's Cross last year? He works with all these bizarre liquids that muggles manufacture which mimics magic, like healing potions,"
"Wacky!" they exclaimed together again.
"Yeah, so when I went to his place this summer, I chanced upon this beauty lying abandoned on his cluttered desk, and read on what was written about it in the back in teeny letters, and whoa, it said that you'll conk out if you sniff it! So, I, being intelligent and gifted, pocketed it, thinking it'll be really helpful in our wild endeavours! Howzzat?!"
"The dog's bollocks!" they said, this time laughing at their matched remark.
"I tested it on his cat, and it lied comatose for hours!"
"Wild!"
"So, how about an escapade this evening?" Lee said with palpable glee.
"Totally ready!" George said with gusto, and stuffed bacon in his mouth.
Ron, flanked by Harry and Hermione who were talking with Ginny and Dean, wasn't paying attention to them, and instead, was looking at them curiously; apparently cottoning on that they were seriously planning some prank.
Fred cocked an eyebrow questioningly at him, daring him to snoop, and Ron quickly looked away, scared.
George laughed at his cheekiness, shaking his head, and once again, Fred was awestruck by his twin's beauty. He looked at him intensely, and the world around George disappeared slowly, and memories of last night came flooding in; his enthralling scent, the feel of his body under him, the way he gasped, his neck...and he felt like doing him right there on the Gryffindor table in front of everyone.
He mentally shook himself, aware of a growing boner, and concentrated hard on mashed potatoes.
"Well, hurry up you two," Lee had finished with his breakfast and was impatiently waiting for them, "Double Potions with Slytherins, fun and frolic with big bat in five minutes, bozos,"
Fred and George hurriedly stuffed their mouths with bacon, washed it down with pumpkin juice, and dashed towards the dungeons with Lee to Snape's class.
The murky class was almost filled with all the students, and they scurried to their usual place, far back, behind the geeks crowded in front of them. Minutes later, Snape whooshed in like a gloomy thunderstorm with his black robes billowing behind him.
He swept his cold gaze on them all, and said in a quiet tone, "Open your textbooks to page 483, Strengthening Potion. The theory has been explained to you in detail in the previous classes. In this class, you will read the instructions carefully, and brew it. I want clear, colourless and odourless concoction within sixty minutes."
"Oooooh! He's jovial as ever!" Lee hissed.
George whispered, "Now is the time to nick the prepared regular Ageing Potion,". He was eyeing the small corked bottles cluttered together on the racks behind them. Among the endless shelves was one labelled 'Ageing Potion', the second-last from the right.
Fred took out the cauldron and was propping it over the fire." How the hell do we distract Snape?" he said.
"I'll do it," Lee said, puffing out his chest bravely.
Fred nodded furtively, and whispered, "We'll wait until there's minutes left for the class to end, and,"
"Lee will set up the distraction," George said, "By the way, what the hell will you do?"
"Leave that part to me," Lee said pompously. He took out a crumpled paper from his robes, and slipped it surreptitiously to George's hand. "Instant Darkness Powder!" he whispered.
"You three!", they heard a sharp hiss from across the room. Snape was glaring at them furiously, "Thirty points from Gryffindor for having the audacity to murmur in my class! Spread out and get on with your tasks immediately!"
The rest of the class was spent brewing Strengthening Potion, and Fred and George exchanged quiet looks in between, memories of last night jumping up at inopportune moments. At one point, he went to the store cupboard to get aconel root, and George was already there hunting for one, his fiery red hair slightly damp with sweat, sticking to the nape of his fair neck, and he suddenly turned around and banged right into him; he could hear the chuckles behind him, but all Fred wanted to do was push his twin against the cupboard and crush his mouth to his.
George simply gave a smile and strode back to his place, and Fred stood there, retrieving his senses, and took what he needed.
After about sixty minutes into the class, Fred's Strengthening Potion was bubbling, slowly turning its colour from light pink to translucent. Across him, Lee was struggling with his brew, green toxic fumes emanating from his cauldron, and Snape glided to him like a ghost, smirking, "I'm afraid you've got it all wrong, Mr. Jordan; haven't you been revising the theories?" he said in an infuriatingly quiet, mocking tone.
"Er, not really, actually, I hate potions, you see.." Lee said, smiling innocently.
Snape's features turned vicious, lips curling in antipathy, "You've got the nerve to answer me like that!" he breathed on Lee's face, and Lee scrunched up his face in nausea. George was suppressing his snickers, hands pressed to his mouth, leaning back on the desk. Fred noticed that he had brewed perfect Veritaserum. Gryffindors looked on with interest, grinning, silently cheering, while Slytherins stood scowling.
"Erm, yeah, its not that hard, you know, to say 'I hate potions'" Lee said earnestly.
"Why you insolent little-" At that moment, the whole class was engulfed in thick dark smoke, and nothing was visible, except dark brown smoke. Everyone was shrieking or murmuring, the class was in disarray.
"WHO DID THIS?!" Snape bellowed.
Fred was quick to take this as the cue to dash towards the racks. He blindly moved backwards, knowing that the racks were directly behind him. He hit the rack and heard the jangle of vials shaking. He moved his hands over the racks frantically, starting from the one at the right corner of the wall towards the left, the smoke was thinning slightly, and he could just make out 'Age-' in the sepia surroundings. He grabbed the vague form of vial sitting in the shelf, and ran forwards blindly, the path ahead of him thick with smoke, and hit against his desk hard. He jammed the vial inside his robes. His whole action was executed within a frenzied few seconds.
"I ASKED WHO DID THIS?!" Snape roared dangerously. Everyone was murmuring in bafflement.
As if we're gonna tell you, idiot! Fred thought. The darkness thinned gradually, and Snape was standing with a crazed expression on his face. It was so hilarious; he couldn't discern who the perpetrator was. He swivelled his head at every one, and Fred arranged his expression to that of mild curiosity and surprise, Lee was standing with a very surprised expression, and George was blinking his eyes confusedly.
"WHOEVER DID THIS WILL BE SERIOUSLY DEALT WITH! I WILL PERSONALLY MAKE SURE THAT THE CULPRIT IS EXPELLED!", he turned to Lee, and vented his anger on him, "You! Fifty points from Gryffindor for your impudence! You will write the theory of Strengthening Potion 50 times, and serve detention this evening brewing a perfect Strengthening Potion! Got it?!"
Lee nodded meekly.
They were laughing their heads off on their way to Defense Against Dark Arts class.
"But Lee, you'll be serving detention this evening," George said, after catching his breath, stepping on to a swivelling staircase, and Fred followed him.
"Uhuh, too bad, I know. Guess you guys'll have to deal with Filch without me," he said dejectedly.
"Lee, that was one hell of a stroke of genius," said Fred, grinning appreciatively at Lee.
"The stroke of genius, which shows itself once in a blue moon, dazzling us mortals," George said, closing his eyes for effect.
Lee facepalmed, and said, "Oh stop it you guys, I'm blushing," and they all entered DADA class laughing, taking their seats at the back row.
It was their first DADA class. They were looking forward to see how the new teacher would fare. He was well-known to be a complete nutter.
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