Who's to know my world
Who's to share my worry
Mountains rise and fall all the time
And it doesn't mean a damn thing to God
So make believe in miracles instead
Make Believe-The Burned
Chapter 8
Blair and Chuck steeped out of the apartment. They had decided that today they would head out, do a little shopping, try to live a regular life while Chuck was feeling better.
As soon as the exited the penthouse the bright flashing lights accosted them. Blair frowned angrily and placed her hand on his shoulder. He didn't even seem to notice as the paparazzi swarmed them.
Chuck (who had been walking slightly ahead of Blair), froze for a moment as questions from screaming reporters were being thrust at him.
He sighed loudly ran his hand through his hair and then he turned quickly and leaned into to Blair. He was starting to feel really weak suddenly and the reports were making his dull headache worse.
"Mr. Bass, how are you holding up?" One reporter asked
"Mr. Bass you look good, considering!" Another yelled through the crowd and then all of the voices started meshing together and Chuck could feel himself becoming overwhelmed.
His breathing was becoming labored and he could feel panic taking over. "Why" he whispered softly to himself. He moved to step around Blair and head back into their home. He refused to have to deal with this today. He licked his lips and moved his hand in front of his eyes to hide his face.
And then suddenly their hired security was there, pushing back the photographers and leading the couple to their Limo. "This is crazy" Blair seethed "We can't even leave the house" she stated as she stepped into the Limo. Chuck was silent as he looked out the window and the Limo took off bridging its way through the crowd of spectators.
Blair pulled out her phone and started dialing "I want something done. I don't want them there when we get back" she all but screamed into the phone before angrily pressing the end button.
She turned to face her husband and that when she had noticed that he looked withdrawn. She slid across the leather seats to move closer to him. "Are you okay baby?" she asked her voice laced with concern.
Chuck never took his eyes off the window as he nodded his head. Blair leaned into him and kissed his neck and she snuggled closer in an attempt to comfort him as the car rode through the city.
"Don't worry, they won't be there when we get back" she said. And still she got no verbal response.
GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG
Blair had spent hours shopping. Buying things always made her feel better although, this time she had to admit that the feeling wasn't as pleasing as it normally would have been.
She had spent the entire time worrying about Chuck. She'd called the house several times to check on him and she had only been gone for a few hours.
When she arrived back home, the first thing she did was head to his bedroom to check on him. She always felt guilty when she left.
Sometimes she would wonder if that would be the last time she would ever see him before she'd exit the door, and the though alone would propel her back into the house and she would find herself just sprawled out on the sofa at the foot of his bed watching him sleep.
That's where she was now, laying on the sofa watching him sleep and she could feel the tears build in her eyes as she took in the sight of him seemingly working o hard to take a breath. She held back a muffled cry and held her hand over her mouth as to not wake him.
She broke down sometimes but she never did it in his presence she felt that the last thing he would need would be to feel that he had to support her.
So she often left her tears for a time when she was alone in their old room in the middle of the night or early morning and the loneliness was too much to bear.
It was funny how she could feel so alone these days, (even when he was sitting right there beside her). She would just find herself feeling as if there was no one in the world who could understand what she was going through.
Those times were the worst. Yea, those were the worst because she had a dreadful fear that that feeling would be never ending if he actually left this world, leaving her in this dreadful state all alone. That she couldn't bear.
She leaned closer onto the bed and stared into his face. And, the anger that she felt earlier in the night was now totally gone. She just wanted to be close to him.
She looked up momentarily startled when Lily peeked into the room. She sat up and ran a hand through her hair. "How is he doing?" Lily asked her voice a whisper.
Blair smiled and turned her full attention back to her husband. "He's holding up" she responded her eyes never leaving him.
"He has a chemotherapy treatment scheduled for tomorrow" she said then she turned her eyes to Lily
Lily blinked her eyes and she remained silent she knew that.
"I will be so glad when this is over" Blair said "The treatments make him really sick I hate them" she told his adoptive mother
"I just want him to be better" Blair said as she moved to hold his hand. It felt warm and that was a reassuringly good sign. It made her smile if only for a second.
"He will be" Lily said and Blair marveled at her ability to sound so sure especially when she (his wife) wasn't sure about anything anymore.
Blair nodded once again fighting the tears that were threatening to spill from her eyes.
"He better be" she said "I don't know what I'd…" she paused and her gaze held onto Lily's and those sad brown eyes of hers were almost enough to make Lily lose her forced composure.
"Get some sleep" Lily whispered. "You have a long day tomorrow" Lily responded and she closed the door leaving the sad couple together.
