DISCLAIMER: GAARA IS MINE.
+ GAARA +
...
Creep – Radiohead
I can see them moving from my peripheral view. They pause 3 feet away in hesitation. The one behind the shorter one gave the latter a slight push, urging her forward. It took her 30 seconds to reach my side. A notebook clenched tightly in shaking hands is thrust under my nose.
"CanIpleasehaveyourautograph?" she says in a rush.
I turn to look up at her with a frown. I don't know if she can tell that I'm frowning since I have no eyebrows. She must have, though, for she stiffens up in fright and runs off screaming. Much to my annoyance. I have half a mind to shout back at her that I was going to say yes. I didn't. I don't shout. I watch her run out the door with her friend following behind. I resume my glaring at the blackboard in front. I can feel eyes watching me but I'm rather good at ignoring stares.
When people see my face, they stare. When people hear me sing, they stare. People stare all the time. I'm used to stares.
The door opens and silence falls in the room. It lasted for about 10 seconds before the whispering starts. I didn't remove my eyes from the blackboard but I can tell that everyone's stares have shifted to the newcomer. The three girls sitting 2 rows from me are whispering to each other rather loudly.
"That's her," says the one with a funny hairstyle. "Hyuuga Hinata."
"The girl Uchiha Sasuke kissed yesterday?" asked another with a horrified voice.
"The bitch herself," confirmed the other maliciously.
I frowned when I heard the name Hyuuga Hinata and it deepened when I heard the word bitch. Hyuuga Hinata being referred to as a bitch? That is enough to stir my curiosity. Wrenching my eyes off the blackboard, I look up to see a blue-haired girl walking with her head down. She's clutching her bag as though she's hanging on for dear life. Like me, she always chooses a seat at the very last row.
How can they call her a bitch? The girl looks absolutely terrified with all the attention she's garnering. She fidgets with her fingertips as soon as she takes a seat, her head still bent. The whispers and dirty looks are still being hurled at her.
"So she was the one who punched Uchiha Sasuke in that club?"
"Yeah. Did you see his beautiful face? He still has those bruises, my poor Prince."
"Who does she think she is? Punching Uchiha Sasuke…"
"Well, duh, I heard she's the Hyuuga heiress."
I tune out all their voices and goes back to staring at the blackboard again. Petty gossips. I do not know the Hyuuga personally. However, she is in most of my classes and she seems dull. And annoyingly clumsy. If she's not stabbing my toes as she walk past she's sitting on me or lunges at me or her books would somehow end up on my head. She is definitely not the type of person who would attract superfluous attention and yet there she is, the center of everyone's extreme dislike. All this animosity appears to have something to do with a person named Uchiha Sasuke. He is quite popular. Everyone knows him. I suppose that's what happens when you get the highest score in the entrance exam.
The doors open with a bang. "All right, bitches! Those who can't play one instrument can go now before I start to get really pissed. You have no right to join the Music Club if you can't play a fucking instrument! So get out, NOW!"
Tayuya is as cheerful as always. The Music Club members must have grabbed any freshmen they can grab. I wasn't grabbed. Tayuya herself asked me to join. A lot of clubs have asked me to join them. I do not want to join any but it's a requirement.
"Senpai, what about me? I can sing," asks someone.
"Can you play an instrument?" Tayuya inquires with a frown.
"No –"
"Then get the fuck out and join the choir or something! If you can play an instrument and you can sing then stay. If you can't play an instrument and you can sing, what the fuck are you going to do with your fucking hands? Grip the fucking mic?"
Fifteen people get to their feet, murmuring as they exit the room. And then there were four.
"This is more like it," Tayuya mumbles approvingly, leaning against the blackboard. The rest of the Music Club starts filing in.
"Four… 3 guys and a cute girl."
"You're that Hyuuga everyone's talking about, right? The one who punched Uchiha Sasuke? Is it true he kissed you at the basketball gym yesterday?"
Hyuuga Hinata's face becomes red and gives a grimace.
"Of course it's true. There are pictures all over the internet. Didn't you see them?"
"Enough with that nonsense," reprimands Tayuya. She looks at the shy girl. "Hyuuga Hinata, can you play an instrument?"
"Y-yes, Senpai."
"What kind of instrument?"
"P-piano… g-guitar, drums –"
"You play drums?" asks some Music Club member doubtfully.
"Y-yes…"
"What else?"
"V-violin, cello, flute –"
"You can't play the flute. I play the flute," Tayuya mutters, interrupting again. "So you can play a lot of instruments but which one do you think is you're good at?"
"P-piano, Senpai," Hyuuga Hinata answers timidly.
"Really?" she smirks. "Let us be the judge of that. Here's the piano. Play something for us."
Hyuuga Hinata's eyes grow huge in nervousness. The girl is pathetic. That much is obvious. Yet I still cannot fathom why she is being labelled a bitch. The logic escapes me.
The Hyuuga walks in front and sits behind the piano. A blush graces her features. "U-uhm… S-senpai, w-what should I play?"
Tayuya leans against the blackboard as she observes the other girl. "Whatever you want."
She plays 'What Are You Doing the Rest of Your Life' by M. Legrand of The Umbrellas of Cherbourg. I like it and listen to it quite often. It's a song whose slightly sorrowful melody whispers close to my ears. I catch Tayuya's eyes. She winks at me. I ignore her. The woman presumes too much.
"Not bad, Hyuuga." Tayuya exclaims over the loud clapping when the Hyuuga was done. I don't quite agree. She can play, no doubt about that however, she was far too self-conscious. I say she was 65% focused on playing the piano and 35% on her audience. Does she think we're going to throw tomatoes at her? "Kidomaru, we have a new pianist."
"Good," a guy says approvingly. "I'm tired of playing the piano."
"You're not as good as Hyuuga, anyway," another member pipes up.
"Congratulations, Hyuuga, you made it. Welcome to the Music Club."
Hyuuga Hinata bows. "T-thank you, Senpai."
Tayuya then proceeds to interrogating the other two freshmen. The other plays the violin while the other plays a guitar. Both are mediocre but they make it in anyway. When she is done with them, she makes quite a show of introducing me.
"I'm sure you know who this is!" she tells everyone excitedly as she clutches my shoulders as though I'm a present of some sort. Everyone stares at me. I do hope they are not going to ask me to sing something for them. The room may be soundproof but my songs will no doubt reverberate throughout the building. And of course, there's no band here. There's an electric guitar, though.
"Play something!" enthuses the other female member of the Music Club. I look at her and she blushes. She then acquires Hyuuga Hinata's stutter. "I-if t-that's o-ok with you…"
"Of course it's ok with him!" Tayuya answers for me. Without my consent. "I told you we're all fans of yours here, Gaa-kun," I flinch at that nickname. She is getting too familiar with me. Besides, not every one here is a fan, judging from the Hyuuga's blank stare. Tayuya leans closer. "It'll be awesome if you play something for us."
I would like to point out that I really have no other choice but I get on my feet and walk in front without a word. A guitar solo will do. If they want to hear me sing, they know where to find me. I play a piece that's been humming in my head for days now. And as always, whenever I play the guitar, I lose my self in the music. It's my escape, my perfect place. After what seem like hours I resurface from my trance as the last note fade away. Everyone's staring at me open-mouthed. Then they erupt into a cheer, led by Tayuya. Stupid. I avoid looking at everyone and take my time in putting away the Music Club's electric guitar.
"We are glad to have you with us, freshmen," Tayuya is now stating. "We have a lot of projects lined-up this year so we must work hard. We will meet here tomorrow, same time. Now get lost." Everyone scrambles for the door. I go back to the back row where Tayuya's standing guard. "Hyuuga, stay. I have something to discuss with you."
The Hyuuga squeaks in response and stands to wait awkwardly in a corner.
"Kankuro is worried about you," Tayuya murmurs, giving me a look that only Temari gives me. This woman really does presume too much. When I say nothing she continues, "You can at least call them and tell them what's going on with you."
"Nothing is going on with me. There's nothing to tell."
"They're worried. They can't help it. You're they're youngest brother." Thank you for reminding me. I resist the urge to roll my eyes. "They want to know if you're sleeping well – if you're sleeping at all – and if you're eating properly."
"Tayuya, you are not my sister," I remind her not unkindly.
She blushes. "Not yet but… Kankuro worries about you all the time…"
Even when you two are having sex? If Kankuro doesn't propose to her in 10 years I might do something out of character. Like laugh out loud. Or roll on the floor laughing my ass off. I grab my bag and turn to go without saying anything. On my way to the door, I pass by the Hyuuga who is staring intently at the floor. Judging by the intense blush on her face and her guilty expression, she heard us.
"Don't forget to eat!" Tayuya calls after me.
I'm a step out of the room. I pause as I take a deep breath. Should I give her my death glare? Should I make her regret her meddling? Sighing, I shut the door behind me. I may be cold towards my siblings but I do care a great deal about them and the people they are involved with. Kankuro and Tayuya have been together for 5 years now. Quite a feat for Kankuro. That must mean he regards Tayuya as someone special. I have to tolerate her more if she's to become my future sister-in-law. Her assumption, not mine… Another sibling. I shudder.
The sun is setting down as I descend the steps of Complex A. I glance curiously at a group of girls huddled around a lone bicycle parked in front of the building.
"Are you sure this is Hyuuga's?" someone asks.
"Yeah,"
"Shouldn't there be a crest or something? She's a Hyuuga, right? Don't prominent families have those? Sasuke-kun has the Uchiha fan in all his things…"
"Do we even know what the Hyuuga crest is?"
"I don't."
"Whatever! Just do it!"
"I'm sure this belongs to Hyuuga. I saw her. Now give me the cutter!"
She then slashes the bike's tires furiously. I pass by them without calling them out for their bad behaviour. It's none of my business.
Later that night, I enter the club I work in. It's packed. But I have no trouble navigating through the crowd. People move out of my way as they see me. Some people give a shriek.
"IT'S GAARA!"
"KYAAA! Is he playing tonight?"
The club bouncer materializes beside me as a few girls start swarming around me. "Move! Out of the way!"
"GAARA! GAARA! GAARA!"
Fame is something I least expected when I started playing in Club Freakz, a haven for up-and-coming musicians like me, some 3 months ago. My music is something not a lot of people can relate to, I'm sure. All of my songs are about depression, solitude and death. It's a kind of music that will have your neighbors knocking on your doors complaining of ear-splitting noise. And yet, here are these people screaming my name. Is it because of my music? Is it… this is awkward but… is it because of my face? I glance to my left. A girl looks like she's hyperventilating as she asks me for a kiss. I consider my face to be peculiar. Definitely not good-looking.
Someone grabs my right arm and next thing I know, my face is pressed tight to a pair of well-endowed chest. The bouncer yanks me away before I suffocate. This is nothing new. It happens all the time. Girls expect me to do the nasty with them whenever they do something like that. Four months ago I've never been kissed. But when I started playing here… I don't even remember who my first kiss was. Girls would grab me after the show. It must be because of alcohol. They are always uncontrollable when under the influence. However, I'm not as disturbed with them as with the knowledge that their kissing and grabbing and groping leaves me feeling… nothing. In truth, I have never felt anything towards the opposite sex. Maybe I'm gay. But I don't know. I have never been hit on by another man. I've seen them checking me out, though.
I eventually reach Baki's office unscathed.
"Use the backdoor when you leave," the bouncer tells me respectfully. He is scared of me and I have no idea why. He is older and twice my size.
I thank him for his assistance before entering the owner's office. Baki's sitting behind his desk. A red-haired man is on the couch while an orange-haired man is pacing the room restlessly. They all looked up when I opened the door.
"Gaara!" Baki exclaims in greeting. He gestures at the chair opposite the couch. "Come take a seat."
"He already looks like a superstar," the orange-haired man mutters… checking me out. He stares as I take my seat. "I like the way you look, kid. And your style is very edgy. Do you have your demo CD?"
"No."
"The fuck? How are you gonna get signed if you don't have a fucking demo CD?"
"Calm down, Yahiko," the red-haired man says quietly. "We haven't even introduced ourselves yet."
Baki gets to his feet to do the introductions. "Gaara, these are Nagato and Yahiko. They're the CEOs of Akatsuki. You know what Akatsuki is, right?"
I nod my head. Of course I know. Akatsuki is a Tokyo based record label specializing in gothic and visual kei artists in genres such as electro-industrial, darkwave, gothic rock, EBM, and industrial metal. Compared to the other agents who have come to seek me, Akatsuki is the only one that I might consider signing to. And that's a big might.
"Good, you're not stupid," Yahiko mutters, plopping down beside Nagato. He glares at me. "Where are your drinks, Baki? Nagato and I will have whiskey. What about you, kid?"
"Gaara doesn't drink," Baki answers as he goes to get whiskey from his little bar in a corner.
Yahiko smirks. "What's the matter, kid? Can't handle alcohol?"
Baki answers for me again. "He can handle alcohol. He just doesn't want to drink. Stop trying to provoke Gaara. It's hard to convince him to come here on weekdays to talk with people like you."
"Are you his manager?" Yahiko counters, glancing from me to Baki. "Let the kid answer."
"I told you not to ask him a lot of questions, either," Baki growls as he place the glasses of whiskey on the center table. He's quite formidable when angry, especially since he's built like a bouncer.
"Sit down."
But for some reason, he's really scared of me. He scrambles back to his chair in haste. "I'm just… looking after you, Gaara."
I glance at him sideways. "I know."
Yahiko snorts in laughter but refrains from commenting. The person named Nagato clears his throat. "I'll go straight to the point. I've seen your performance last week and I was blown away. You have so much originality and pure talent. I want you with us. You have a huge potential to hit it big. What do you say?"
"My priority at the moment is studying."
"Bullshit," Yahiko scoffs. "I'm a high school dropout. When we were your age, Nagato and I already had an album, performed in arenas, made appearances on TV –"
"I don't care about that."
"Why do you play music then?" Nagato asks curiously.
"It's none of your business."
Yahiko jumps to his feet. "You – You have some serious attitude problem! Who do you think you are?"
"I told you not to ask him a lot of questions," Baki says smugly.
"Shut up!"
"Yahiko, sit down."
"But I am interested with what you have to offer," I mutter. Everyone stares at me. "Why else did I show up tonight?"
Yahiko shouts something obscene and downs his whiskey in one gulp. "This kid… If his fucking talent is as rare as his fucking attitude then sign him up, Nagato. What a fucktard." I wish he'd stop cursing. "Fucking bastard doesn't have a fucking demo CD. Have you ever recorded a song, kid?"
"No."
"Baki told us you're free on weekends," Nagato says pleasantly while Yahiko sits back down with more curses. "You can come by on our studio with your band –"
"I do not have a band. They're Baki's." Nagato looks at Baki. Baki looks at me. "They can play with me if they wish."
"Never mind," Yahiko exclaims gruffly. "We have a band available. Is everyone scared of you, kid?"
"You're not," I point out.
"Damn right, I'm not!" he gives a bark of laughter.
"Are you free this Saturday?" Nagato asks, checking something on his phone. "No homework?"
"The fuck with the homework."
"I am free this Saturday and I do my homework in advance." I have a lot of time at night.
Yahiko looks at me as though I'm from another planet. "Nerd."
"That's awesome," Nagato holds out his hand for me to shake. He smiles as we shake hands. I notice how Yahiko's scowling at our hands. "You will not regret this. The contract will be ready on Saturday so bring your manager with you."
I nod. "I'll go then."
Nagato bids me goodbye but Yahiko suddenly becomes quiet. What a moody guy. Baki follows me to the door. "See you. Take the backdoor."
"Yeah."
The way to the backdoor is almost empty. Only the employees are allowed here and they pay me no mind as I walk past. I step out into the dark alleyway. The sight that greets me gives me a pause. A middle-aged man is pushed against the wall by two juveniles.
"Give me your money, old man!"
"P-please! It's my daughter's tuition!"
I'm not unfamiliar with scenes like this. Last month there was a couple having sex here. They noticed me but I pretended that I did not notice them and walked past. Much like what I'm doing now. It's none of my business. I'm no superman, either. But I might ask the security guard for help. I'm a few feet away when I hear the old man calling me.
"Please, help!"
I stop. I hear the unmistakable sounds of violence behind me. I'm not a Good Samaritan. I'm not good, period. I walk away from situations like this. I do not want to get involved at all. And yet, when I heard him pleading for help, I find myself flinging my school bag on the dirty ground and move towards the old man getting beaten up. There are two of them and there's me. As Yahiko observed, I am a nerd. I am not physically fit but I can throw a punch. I can fight as well as Kankuro, if not better.
I don't know how many minutes have passed but the two guys backed out in the end. They are both sporting bloody lips and swollen eyes and the other guy's clutching his stomach. They're not that good in fighting at all but they did manage to hit me with a bottle on the side of my head. Still, I'm a little disappointed. They barely injured me. The old man is cowering in a corner.
"They're gone," I tell him, turning around to retrieve my bag. I pick it up in dismay. It's now dripping. It seems that I dropped it in a puddle. Awesome. Everything inside is probably drenched.
"Excuse me, son…"
I stiffen. "I'm not your son."
"I just want to say thank you."
Without looking back, I walk away. On the street, people stare. I can feel something dripping down my face. It must be blood. No wonder people are staring. In the Metro, people avoid me like a plague. When I get off from the subway I'm still conscious. I see a convenience store on the way to my apartment. Do I have a first-aid kit? I don't have soda, though. I should buy some. And onigiri too… When was the last time I ate?
I drop the items – 1 pack of onigiri and 1.5 litres of Coca-Cola – on the counter. The cashier looks at me and his eyes grow huge in fear. I must look hideous.
"I'll pay for them," someone behind me offers. It's the old man. Did he follow me all the way here? He looks terrified of me as well that he won't meet my eyes. "I owe you. For helping me."
I let him pay. After which he bows at me respectfully. I didn't bow back. I'm not really used to bowing even though I'm Japanese. I watch him exit the store and glance at the purchase he paid for. I do not understand. Is it because I helped him?
"Ga-Gaara-kun?" a familiar voice gasps. Hyuuga Hinata's just entered the store. "W-what happened to your face? Y-you're bleeding!" Without answering, I walk past her. She follows. "W-wait! S-stop!"
I stop.
"L-let me help you with that."
"With what?"
"Y-your injuries. I live j-just across the street," she peers up at me. "You have a h-huge gash on your right eyebrow."
I look at her suspiciously. Does she even know first-aid?
"C-come on. You're losing blood."
I suppose she's right. I'm starting to feel a little light-headed. And so I follow her. I do not know if I'm finally losing consciousness or that I just lost so much blood but after a few turns I'm quite convinced that Hyuuga Hinata's house is not just 'across the street'.
"Where exactly do you live?" I ask as we make another turn.
"W-we're almost there," she answers a little apologetically. "Are you okay?"
I'm losing more blood and on the verge of passing out. I did not answer, though.
"S-see that red building over there?" she points at the apartment building ahead of us. "T-that's where I live."
This is not 'across the street'. This is two blocks away from the convenience store. As we near her building, I see two men in black suits standing next to a dark Mercedes watching us. Both of them have the Hyuuga eyes. Hyuuga Hinata says nothing, as though they're not there. Am I hallucinating? Why am I with her in the first place? Why did I even agree to this? We're about to enter the building when the two men block the path.
"Hinata-sama, who is this?" the taller man asks. He's staring at me distrustfully.
"H-he's a classmate of mine. He needs help with his injuries."
"I will take him to a hospital," the other offers.
"It's okay. I'm a Red Cross v-volunteer, remember?"
"He is not trustworthy, Hinata-sama."
I wonder how long they're going to have this conversation outside. "I should go."
"I'm sorry, Gaara-kun… but you're already here so… P-please, he's my classmate. He's covered in blood!"
The taller man studies her and finally gives a nod. "Ko will stay with you."
The younger man follows us inside. Hyuuga Hinata must be someone important to have bodyguards. I immediately know which door her apartment is. Her wrecked bicycle is placed forlornly beside it.
"C-come in," Hyuuga Hinata mumbles in invitation, stepping inside.
It's small. As small as my own apartment. But that's normal in this part of Tokyo. I take off my shoes, put my damp bag beside it and walk into the tiny living room. The Hyuuga girl is rummaging something in the kitchen while the Hyuuga man is standing rigidly at the entrance.
Hyuuga Hinata thrusts a damp cloth in my hand. "S-sit down, please and wash your face. We need to disinfect your wound. How did you get that?"
"Beer bottle."
She nods. It seems that she really knows what she's doing, judging from the determined glint in her eyes. I can… smell her. She smells nice… pleasant. She shifts closer to me as she dabs something on my forehead. I feel even more light-headed.
"D-does it hurt?" she asks worriedly. She's looking at me with concern in her clear eyes. Suddenly I can't breathe. I can't pass out here. I lean away.
"Are you done?"
She visibly flinches. That came out more rudely than I intended. "A-almost…"
She continues with her work but this time she keeps her distance. I stare at her. Perhaps I've been staring too blatantly because her face is so red it would put the apples into shame. "Why are you doing this?"
"W-what?"
"Why are you helping me?"
"Y-you're my classmate," she answers, smiling. "And you're hurt… But e-even if you're not my classmate I would've helped you still."
"Are you saying you're an inherently good person? That you helped me out of the pureness of your heart?"
She looks down so I can't see her eyes. "I'm not a good person… Why is it important to know the reason I'm helping you, anyway?"
"You puzzle me." I reply honestly. I understand now why the old man paid the food I bought earlier: to repay me for helping him. Because he felt indebted. Hyuuga Hinata, though… I did nothing for her. I didn't help her bike from those girls.
"I o-overheard your conversation with Tayuya-senpai…" she confesses. "A-and… well… this is my apology… for stepping on your toes all the time… for running into you the other day…"
So that's it. "I accept your apology."
She beams at me. I feel light-headed again. I watch her as she puts gauze on the wound. I feel odd. I have been this close physically with a woman these past weeks and yet… I have never felt dizzy. "Did I lose a lot of blood?" I ask her.
"T-the gash is about an inch long but shallow… N-no, I don't think you've lost a lot…" she shifts closer again, her full attention on dressing my wound.
I catch my breath as I sense her hand push aside a lock of hair. I stop breathing altogether as I notice that we're practically nose-to-nose. I look away. Anywhere but the face in front of me. My eyes found the Hyuuga man leaning against the wall with his arms crossed, glaring at me. If looks could kill, I'd be on the early stages of decomposition by now.
"T-there! Done!" Hyuuga Hinata cries proudly. She tries to get up but being clumsy; she stumbles and steps into my purchase.
My food.
The onigiri is crushed helplessly under her foot. I have managed to save the soda just in time.
"O-oh m-my!" she gasps in shock. "I'm so s-sorry! I didn't m-mean to!"
The soda is more important. "It's fine."
She picks up the plastic bag with the poor onigiri in it. "Is this… y-your dinner?"
"It was supposed to be my dinner, yes."
"Oh."
"I am grateful for your help. I'll go now."
"W-wait!" she rushes to the refrigerator. "I h-have food here better than that onigiri from the vending machine… I made this Korean dish called kimchi. Tenten didn't like it. She said it's too spicy. She doesn't like the smell, either. There's a lot so… here, take it."
She thrusts a big container in my hands. She's giving me food? Maybe it tasted bad. Why do women like experimenting in the kitchen and force other people to eat their dreadful cooking? Temari always tries to make me eat one of her rock-hard brownies. Is that an ailment females have in common?
I thank the Hyuuga girl anyway. I'll just throw this. The bodyguard follows me outside.
"Do not misinterpret Hinata-sama's kindness," he mutters quietly. "It is no more than that."
I have no idea what he's talking about. I ignore him and keep walking. Once I reach the street, I look around in surprise. My apartment is right in front of me. Just across the street.
May 31, 2012 – I obviously had fun writing Gaara's POV. This is the longest chapter I've ever written so far, lol!
I know nothing about music. I can't even understand notes. But I do watch a lot of musicals and TV shows about the music industry. That piece that Hinata played on the piano, I got that from a manga. So if there are mistakes I apologize.
You all are probably thinking GaaHina now, eh? *insert evil laugh* Kukukukuku~ GaaHina will definitely make a cute couple. But that's another fanfic. I will warn you now that Sasuke will win the race... I don't know if I will write from Gaara's POV often. He's too... complex? It's fun, though.
THANK YOU AS ALWAYS TO THOSE REVIEWS! You guys are amazing~ ^^
