Author's Note: Okay, so, yeah, um, I know. I remember what I said. I'm sorry. I really am. Too much roleplay, and a certain jerk keeps distracting me and killing all my time... Oh, there was the part where I got grounded, too.
Maple's alarm clock went off and she slammed her hand down on the snooze button, as she did three more times afterward before finally getting up as seven o'clock. Seemed the young Romanian was up already, and that he had been up for a good while before Maple.
The Prussian picked up her notebook and pencil. Before she ever started getting ready for school, she always wrote a journal entry since she was around five or six.
Dear Diary,
That Romanian boy stayed over last night. Apparently his name is Horia. I would write out his last name as well, but to be honest, I have absolutely no clue what to even put as the first letter. Romanian names are weird.
Anyway it turns out I really can't speak Romanian very well because half the time I had no clue what the heck he was saying. He was talking too fast and the Romanians put their words in a retarded order. The German language does sometimes, but not the whole time. Screw the stupid language anyway. I'm awesome with or without knowing it.
Heh. Whatever. No one cares.
~Maple, soon-to-be proven strongest and possibly most arrogant jerk in the school (because I've drawn a blank as to what other crappy title to give myself)
Maple tossed her pencil and notebook in her backpack. She pushed Horia out of her room and locked the door before going over to her closet.
She put on a red shirt with a horizontal white stripe across the middle, a long denim skirt, and her combat boots. She put in Austrian flag earrings and a necklace with a charm of the Austrian flag. She quickly changed the laces of her boots from black to red and white before pushing her glasses up the bridge of her nose.
She had a specific theme for each day of the week. Monday through Friday, she wore something patriotic for each of the ethnicities that were mixed in her blood from the most to the least - German/Prussian, Austrian, Liechtensteiner, Swiss, and Hungarian. Not knowing what should be her outfit theme on on Saturday, she just chose to wear a Cancer-themed outfit. On Sunday, she wore something Protestant-related.
Maple opened her door and ran into the bathroom to brush her teeth and hair before running downstairs and out the front door, not even really caring where Horia decided to go. She half-hoped she'd run into Zim and Dib were there.
Sure enough, when she arrived Zim and Dib were arguing.
"Hallo, idioten." Maple glared and put a hand on her hip.
The two looked over at her and were immediately silent.
Maple scowled and pushed up her glasses, tossing her ponytail over her shoulder. She sat down on the bench and pulled out her Haruhi Suzumiya novel. She could vaguely hear the two trying to get her attention, but she just blocked them out. Her book was more important.
Eventually the bus pulled up to the bus stop, and Maple pushed past the two morons and sat down in the back. As anyone could have easily guessed, Zim and Dib were arguing.
Why? No one was forcing them to sit together. Standing, actually. They were standing and arguing on a moving bus. Because that is not hazardous.
But that wasn't the point Maple was trying to silently prove.
Either one of them could just get up and go sit elsewhere. It's like...absolutely hating chocolate ice cream, then buying chocolate ice cream, eating it knowing you absolutely hated it, and still complaining because you absolutely hated it. The two boys' bickering was nowhere above anything other than purely stupid. Actually, in Maple's opinion, it fell far lower.
A loud "SCREW YOU!" from Zim jerked Maple out of her thoughts about the true level of stupidity that the morons' arguing reached. Not that trying to find the exact level of stupidity of something like that is any less stupid. Whatever.
Dirty thoughts crossing the Prussian's mind, she stood up and called to Zim, "Careful what you say! He might actually think you're serious and try to, or just take advantage of the fact you said that in the first place!"
They both looked at her. Dib flushed bright red, Zim looked entirely clueless, and everyone else on the bus burst out laughing.
Three points for Maple D'harcey, zero for Dib Membrane.
Maple silently cursed herself for giving herself points in the first place. She never had been the one to do things like that. She preferred to think of herself more as a chaotic neutral. She never was the type to single out one person like she was, unless they had directly attacked her first. It was her against everyone. That's how it had always worked. Oh well, whatever.
As an idea came to mind, she stood up. Of course, by now there was an existent idea that Dib might be gay. So why not act on the idea she created?
"Zim und Dib in einem Baum sitzt, K-U-S-S-E-N! Zuerst kommt die Liebe, nächstes kommt Ehe, dann kommt der Baby und der ständig Kinderwagen!" she chanted, repeating it a few times before sitting back down. Several of the student didn't stop chanting, but instead kept it going, not even bothering to change it over to English instead of German.
Mission accomplished! Maple thought triumphantly. She reached into her backpack and pulled out her notebook and a pencil.
Dear Diary,
I officially think I've found the two stupidest beings to ever live.
Zim is an obvious alien, and his disguise...it's just awful. I don't know if he's stupider for choosing something like that, or if everyone else is for not being able to tell what he is.
Dib just seems to be really slow, and his reaction time could use a LOT of work. There's not really anything else to that.
I think maybe my IQ is dropping from their mere presence. It is, I'm going to honestly say, worse than when I read My Immortal. Nd al duh spelin was lik dis nd da mane crakter wuz a goffic stanist mray soo alos evry1 wuz ut off crarctre. Does that help paint a good picture of what I'm going through?
...Looks like it's "skool" time now. I'll write later, if I feel like it.
~Maple, soon-to-be the newest member at the closest mental institute if two certain retards don't SHUT UP
Maple tossed her things back into her bag and slung it over her shoulder as she got off the bus.
As she walked through the door of the classroom, she noticed a clipboard on Ms. Bitters's desk with a head that said in big, bold text "DEAR CLASS." When all the students were seated, Maple tossed herself down in the teacher's chair and picked it up. She cleared her throat and starting reading it out loud.
"Dear class, I'm going to be absent for the next few days because there's no way I could survive another consecutive school day teaching you. The lot of you are filthy, pathetic mongrels who will lead unimaginably sad lives, and just looking at you makes me sick. I had the decency to leave you all on your own with a list of work and assignments and spare the mentality, sanity, and whatever hope for this generation of whichever substitute would have otherwise filled in for me may have left."
Zim, whose chin was rested on the palm of one of his hands, rolled his eyes. "The teacher unit is the filthy, pathetic mongrel," he grumbled.
Maple smacked a ruled against the desk as hard as she could without breaking it, and jumped to her feet. "It looks as if we need someone to fill in as the teacher for a few days. All in favor of someone who isn't me?"
Most hands were raised, as Maple had expected. She just shrugged and turned on the computer that was sitting under the desk. It's not like it mattered if they wanted her to be the substitute teacher or not.
"Uh-huh, ja, excellent," she said, paying more attention to the monitor than to anything else. "Funny, I nearly forgot that only the teacher's say in this even matters at all. If you want some other fill-in, you're gonna have to take it up with her. Now, class, open your History. textbooks to page two hundred eighty-four and read the three final chapters in that book. If you slack off, you have detention, and if you ignore me, I'll snap your neck."
Maple logged onto Grooveshark, then played the playlist that consisted of Bleach character songs and a few Vocaloid songs. She reached out into her backpack and pulled out her History notebook and a pen to doodle whatever came to mind. She was the teacher, after all, so she could do whatever she wanted.
Author's note: The next chapter is here! Yay~ I'm sorry I abandoned all my lovely readers. I'm so sorry! :'( I'll try to get the next chapter up soon, and I'll be getting around to the actual plot of the story within the next few chapters.
Hallo, idioten. - Hey, idiots.
Zim und Dib in einem Baum sitzt, K-U-S-S-E-N! Zuerst kommt die Liebe, nächstes kommt Ehe, dann kommt der Baby und der ständig Kinderwagen! - Zim and Dib sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G! First comes love, next comes marriage, then comes the baby and the baby carriage!
