Between
By Ninnik Nishukan


SEVEN: The Lion Chasing Its Own Tail

There was laughter, and he turned quickly, feeling paranoid. Laughter at his expense was the last thing he wanted right then. What if it was Ranma who—

It wasn't.

"You're at it again?"

His brightened for a second as he caught sight of Ukyo's grinning face, but then his shoulders drooped again. He really wasn't in the mood for any company, and Ukyo was always so...she was just such a powerful presence...

It was different this time, Ukyo realized as soon as their eyes met, as soon as she saw his dejected posture where he sat on the park bench. That was different; his eyes, his face, his body language—everything. He wasn't just sulking or moping, he looked really...depressed. Really drained; both physically and mentally. He didn't even say hi to her, he just barely glanced at her before he kind of...sunk in on himself.

"Ryoga…?" She asked tentatively, taking a few steps toward him.

Finally he looked up, and his eyes looked so sad and vacant that she had to swallow hard, barely keeping herself from taking a step back again.

Ryoga felt a tiny, tiny spark of hope in his chest at the soft tone of her voice; was she really not going to tease him and bother him this time? Was there somebody who actually cared enough to ask him how he was doing? It fizzled out just as easily as it had turned up, however, because would it really make any difference? He'd still have all his problems and— and—

"All she wanted was for me to cheer up Ranma!" He blurted, unable to contain his hurt any longer, despite it all. "She was only concerned about him and his precious feelings!"

Ukyo stood and stared at him for a moment before she made a decision.

"Tell me the story," she said, settling down on the bench next to him, sort of excited to hear it despite feeling sorry for Ryoga. It'd be interesting to hear about an adventure that Ranma had had and she hadn't participated in. "At least you chose a better place to mope this time," she added with a small grin as she made herself comfortable.

Ryoga gave her an apprehensive look, afraid that she wasn't taking him seriously, but eventually nodded, beginning his tale. If nothing else, an opportunity to vent might do him some good even if it wouldn't solve his problems.


The boy did a technique fuelled by depression. Ukyo thought incredulously, after he'd told her everything. By depression.

"Do you have any idea how insane that is?" She asked him, leaning forward with a concerned, disbelieving look.

A small frown line appeared on Ryoga's brow. "Is it?"

She nodded vigorously. "Yes. Yes, it is. Stark, raving mad. Completely bonkers."

"No, it's not!" Ryoga objected, finally jolting to life again at her insult; or slightly crude expression of worry, whatever it was.Either way, he felt like defending himself. "You gave up your career as a chef for him! I just wanted to beat him again— for real this time--- and if I had to be a little down to do it—"

Ukyo gaped at him. Talk about an understatement! "What? 'A little down'? Try 'wallowing in your own misery'! My career was one thing— your mental health is something different! Do you like being depressed? Who are you? Eeyore?"

Ryoga blinked in confusion. "Who?"

"Oh, forget it." Ukyo sighed heavily. "Listen, you don't have to be all warm and fuzzy or anything, but at least you should be able to smile once in a while, you know? And I don't mean those strained, half-hearted therapy smiles, either!"

Again, he looked at her with incomprehension. "Therapy smiles?"

Ukyo gave an impatient grunt. "You haven't watched a lot of TV in your lifetime, have you?"

He shook his head. "No."

"Okay, just forget it, then." She waved a hand vaguely, sighing with mild irritation. "Just, you know…feel better and stuff."

"Feel better?" If the situation had been any different, Ryoga might've felt inclined to laugh at her lame attempt at playing his therapist, but as it was, he couldn't get up the energy to smile, even a half-hearted one. Even the somewhat insensitive, yet usually cheerful Ukyo didn't have anything to say to make him feel better, and now everything felt so hopeless again. "I lost. Even after all that. I put myself through the wringer emotionally, I deliberately made myself more and more depressed to win— and I lost. And now I just feel so dead, like there's nothing left in me, like I've used everything up." He sniffled quietly. "And she said we'd…we'd be friends forever…"

Her heart broke for him as he began sinking down into misery again when she thought she'd managed to pull him up from it. If Ranchan ever told her that, she didn't know what she'd do.

Ryoga wasn't crying in a loud, melodramatic way either, he was just kind of…shaking, barely making any sound at all, big, fat tears rolling down his face and dampening the front of his shirt.

And it was seriously freaking her out.

"Snap out of it!" Ukyo blurted nervously, smacking his shoulder, but it didn't even make him flinch. "Come on!" She went on, pulling at his hair, but all he did was turn his face away from her. Getting agitated, she finally got out her spatula and hit him over the head with it, hard.

This time he winced, but he still didn't stop crying, not even to yell at her.

Now she was getting to be honestly worried.

She thought for a while. "What you need, Ryoga, is a big hug!" She announced suddenly.

That made him react! Finally! His entire body froze, and he snapped for air. "Wh-wh-what? A-a-a h-huh…huh…h-hug?"

She rolled her eyes in a good-natured but overbearing way. "Yeah. Exactly."

"Um…Ukyo?" Ryoga swallowed hard. Was she…?

"Excuse me! Granny!" Ukyo exclaimed abruptly, running across the street towards a cozy-looking, rounded grandma-type lady who was obviously out doing her shopping. Skidding to a halt, she smiled at the older woman and bowed slightly to her. "I don't mean to sound rude, but if I gave you five hundred yen, would you please hug that nice but sad young man over there? He's feeling a little down, you see."

Ryoga almost swallowed his own tongue from the shock value. What the hell…?

The old lady looked horrified for a moment, but then burst out laughing as she caught sight the bright red face of the young man across the street. "Oh, you almost had me there, Miss! That's a good one! You shouldn't embarrass your friends like that, you know." She added in a mildly reprimanding but mostly amused voice.

"Actually, I wasn't kiddi—"Ukyo began, but the woman didn't notice.

"Wait 'till I tell my husband," The old woman grinned, winking at Ukyo before walking away, still chuckling to herself.

Ukyo looked puzzled when she crossed the street again. When she met his eyes, she saw that he was already staring at her. "What's wrong?"

"What wrong? That's my line!" He snapped. "What the hell was that for?"

Ukyo shrugged, the very picture of innocence. "Well, I just thought it'd make you feel better."

"And I just thought that you— forget it." Ryoga's mouth snapped shut as he cut himself off, shaking his head as he looked down, thoroughly discomfited and still slightly pissed off.

"What?" Ukyo asked, tilting her head curiously at him.

"Nothing." He mumbled in a tight voice.

"Wait, you thought I was gonna hug you?" She asked incredulously, a mirthful tone creeping into her voice.

Slowly, Ryoga's cheeks reddened as his downcast gaze travelled up to her face. "Um…"

Ukyo laughed out loud. "What, and have you bleeding all over my shirt? Don't be silly!"

Ryoga took a step back, feeling the insult like a twist of his heart. "Well, thanks a lot," he said bitterly, scowling at her.

Her eyes widened. "Wait…did you actually want me to…?"

"N-no!" He stuttered. "Now you're being silly!"

Ukyo shook her head, looking exasperated. "You need a mother-type hug right now, Ryoga, not from me!"

Shaken, he paused at her words with a wistful look in his eyes, staring at her for a second before he hung his head, looking crestfallen. "I…I haven't seen my mom in a year…"

That stopped her; she'd never thought of that before. Probably no one ever did. "I'm sorry."

"Yeah, well…" He mumbled evasively.

Ukyo swallowed. "Here I was trying to cheer you up and everything, too…"

He frowned. "It's not always that easy."

"I guess…" She sighed.

He shook his head. "And it's not your problem, anyway."

She looked up, puzzled. "Not my problem?"

"No…" He mumbled, still shaking his head.

"Ryoga…I know I'm not your mother or your girlfriend or your fiancée or your sister or even your best friend…" She said tryingly. "But I can still care a little, can't I?"

Ryoga looked mystified as he sought her eyes, trying to figure out what she was thinking. "Y-you can?"

She shrugged. "All I know is that I don't want to see you like this. It's like you're worse every time I find you moping around Nerima, you know?"

He looked down again, slightly ashamed. "Sorry…"

Ukyo rolled her eyes. "Oh, what the hell…" She muttered before stepping forward to draw him into a hug. She held him like that for a while, arms around him until she felt him tentatively reach around her as well, his arms trembling, and she allowed herself to rest her face against his warm, solid shoulder for a moment. Then she gave him one last, good squeeze, patting him gently on the back before she let him go.

She flashed him a smile when they parted. "How was that? A little human contact always does the trick, huh?"

"Y-yes…" He agreed in a small voice, and she could see that the whole thing had struck him to the core; he was still trembling.

"Feel any better?" She went on when he didn't say anything, only looked at her, or maybe at something behind her; she wasn't sure.

He nodded slowly, feeling as if he'd just fallen overboard a supposedly empty ship...yet someone had just thrown him a safety ring. It didn't make any sense to him. "Why are you doing this?" He demanded softly, searching her face nervously. There had to be an angle. There always was. People always had an angle; he always got hurt whenever he assumed or at least hoped they didn't.

She shrugged. "You're all I've got, right? Can't have you falling apart. Who else would help me with Ranma and Akane?" There was a brief, crooked grin. "Who else would I banter with?"

"Can't you just banter with your beloved Ranchan?" He asked sarcastically.

She shook her head as if the thought was inconceivable. "Oh, no, Ranchan and I never fight! I don't want to banter with him, I just want to be nice to him! He's got such a tough life, you know?" She gave a somewhat dramatic sigh. "And he always fights so much with Akane, so I want to show him that I'm different! I don't want to give him a bad impression!"

Ryoga rolled his eyes at her dreamy ramblings; it was beyond him how she could view Ranma that way. "But if I get a bad impression of you, it doesn't matter, right?"

Ukyo gave a wide grin. "Exactly!"

"Gee, thanks," he muttered.

"Oh, come on," Ukyo rolled her eyes. "So what if I try to act cute around Ranma? As if you act like this around Akane? You're all 'oh, hiiiii, Akane', pouring on the sugar like there's no tomorrow! I swear your voice goes up at least a pitch or two! You're a total dork around her!"

"Wh-what? Hey! I'm not!" He objected, reddening as he snapped for air.

"You even tell her that her cooking is great." She said with a sense of finality, as if that was the only evidence she needed, sending him a rather meaningful look.

"Come on! It's not that bad!"He began half-heartedly, knowing that she was right, but not willing to admit to it. Besides, Akane could probably get better if she only tried harder, anyway. She had such will power and spirit, after all…

Ukyo rolled her eyes. "See? Total dork."

Ryoga reddened further. "Oh, yeah? And what happened to 'oh, Ryoga, why would I be wasting any time on trying to get you to date Akane if I didn't think you were good enough for her'?" He said irritably, doing a high-pitched, silly impression of her voice.

Ukyo blinked. "What are you talking about?"

"You said that at Atami—"He began, but interrupted himself with a dry: "Oh, except you were probably to drunk to remember, right?"

Ukyo gritted her teeth. "I was not drunk!"

Ryoga scoffed. "Sure."

Folding her arms over her chest, Ukyo scowled at him. "I was just a little tipsy, that's all. "

A smirk tugged at the side of his mouth. "You just keep telling yourself that."

Ukyo stomped her foot in annoyance. They both knew she hadn't actually been drunk; now he was obviously just trying to wind her up. "Look! I was just saying that, well…in the beginning when you're trying to date someone, you don't burst out about all your bad sides at once, right? Or you'll scare the date away. So what's wrong with me trying to show Ranchan that I can be sweet and caring, huh?"

Ryoga sent her a reproachful look. "It wouldn't hurt if you tried to be a little nicer to me, too."

Ukyo sighed. "It's a little too late for that now, isn't it?" She shrugged. "Besides, everybody needs someone they can let loose a little with, right? Someone they can be crabby around without it having any consequences? It's like your family, right? You can be yourself around your family, however annoying, and they'll still love you."

His eyes shot wide open at her shocking words. "Wh-what?"

She got a strange look on her face, then, as if she'd just realized what she'd said and what it must've sounded like to him. "No! No, listen, I didn't mean…oh, come on! I just meant that I don't have to be all cute around you since I'm not trying to marry you or anything, okay? You get that, right? There's no pressure, that's the thing. I don't have to impress you, is what I'm saying."

His shoulders slumped with reprieve as he heard her explanation. "Okay, yeah. I guess I can understand that."

"And that's a good thing, right?" She smiled just a little. "I mean, it's nice to have someone you can just talk to, huh? Because we couldn't exactly talk to Ranma and Akane about breaking them up, now could we?"

Ryoga smirked slightly, despite himself. "Yeah, that would be one weird conversation."


As Ukyo walked home after saying goodbye to Ryoga, she pondered the embrace she'd shared with him.

A little human contact really was nice, she thought, surprised at how sad she suddenly felt. That was the only reciprocated hug she'd had in two months, she'd realized now, the last one being when she'd visited her father in Osaka. It wasn't only sad— it was pathetic, wasn't it?

Well, at least she'd made somebody feel better; at least she'd actually made a difference. And that made her able to overlook her lack of regular physical contact for the time being.

Because today, for just a moment, she'd felt needed.

As he wandered in search of a camp site for the evening, Ryoga had to admit to himself that he felt better. He still felt a bit drained and unsteady after everything that had happened, but there was still something different now. He felt just a little less cold and numb, and he wasn't dragging his steps as he walked anymore. It was as if Ukyo's show of compassion had thawed him a little; it had been like a crutch to a man with a limp. He still wasn't fully recovered, but it had helped.

It had really helped.

For the rest of the night, he had the reassuring feeling that maybe he wasn't as utterly alone in the world as what he usually felt like.


TBC.

Author's note: Hah! I bet NOBODY expected me to update again this soon! Muhahahah!

Unless you don't know, Eeyore is a gloomy, negative character from Winnie-The-Pooh, which is huge in Japan. 'Therapy smiles' are from Ally McBeal. Did it run in Japan? I have no idea, but I'm thinking it did considering how big it was.

I'm not really doing the Cursed Tunnel of Lost Love this time around since I've already handled the subject in The Exit. Besides, I don't know, there didn't really seem to be that many missing scenes in it. It will be referred to heavily in the next chapter, though.

Next up: Ryoga VS Ukyo.