Skyskater's Daily Note: So, today I was bombed with a bunch of reviews. But let me tell you something, there's nothing like getting a bunch of positive reviews and then getting the one that says something like, "Yeah, I didn't like this story, it's too underdeveloped."

COME ON! DON'T LIKE, DON'T READ! Good God! After I specifically said no flames!

Daily Advice: Never flame Skyskater. I'll get revenge.


Monday again. I didn't bother to write about yesterday, because, simply, there was nothing to write about yesterday. Well, alright, let's just say that, in lieu of not wanting to write this here for the whole world's prying eyes to see, I may or may not owe Urahara a new tail fin for his black Honda Accord. That all depends on whether or not he notices it. Knowing him, he wouldn't notice it. If he was stuck in a cardboard box, he would not notice a bear standing at the entrance. That guy is virtually blind, and let me tell you, I blame his hat. If he took it off every once in a while, he wouldn't be as blind as he is now.

I'm in detention. AGAIN. I can't believe it. I know you're probably fainting, foaming at the mouth, keeling over in your chair, and all that other shit that people who are in shock do. Anyways, I really don't understand why I have to be in this hellhole again. I mean, it was free period. Okay, let me tell you what happened.

So it's free period. Basically, this means we can do whatever the hell we want within reason while the teacher does Sudokus and crosswords while sipping a nonfat soy latte from Starbucks. So, naturally, I want to have some fun. That seems okay, right? I guess that's wrong. According to Mr. Lee, our math teacher, that is.

I stand up now, right. Of course, Mr. Lee doesn't look up, because free period is normally weird. I brought a marionette doll to school for this very purpose, one that looks almost exactly like me. It can't look exactly like me, because then it would be voodoo and I ain't gonna go sticking around pins in a doll that I made of myself. That seems far too conceited and...painful.

Right. So I start playing with the puppet, making its mouth move, and I make these noises:

"Humphlurg! Humphlurg! Humphlurg!" And let me tell ya, I think Miss Chan, one of the biology teachers, would be proud. She showed us this video the other day, and these deer, they were making these sounds that sounded exactly like what I was doing. Well, of course, for much different reasons. The deer were in heat; I was just goofing around. Yes, I know, biology teachers have no shame. I think they like to taunt us with these videos because it's illegal for us young ones to have the three-letter word that begins with an S and ends with an X and no I am not talking about the number SIX.

So Uryuu, whose head is, of course, buried in a book, now stands up and says, "Please, you're making these random noises again. Can you stop it? Can you not see I am trying to read? You must be considerate of other people's feelings -"

And then he goes on this long rant about how I'm being loud, noisy, and extremely rude. So of course I interrupt him.

"I am?"

He says, "Yes, you are." If anything, when it comes to simple little social conversations, which does not include the rant mentioned above, he is a man of many words. If you didn't understand that, please go back and read it again because I will not take the time to explain it to you.

So I say, "And you tell me this WHY?...Seriously, what're you gonna do to me? You can't hurt me, it would be child abuse. And honestly, my zanpakutoh would completely demolish your sad little bow and sticks."

And then he goes on this rant about how I'm BOTHERING him, and about how he's trying to read a good book here and so I look at the book, which is now open on his desk while he continues to rant and rave about this whole thing and blah blah blah and I realize, after reading a few lines, that he's into this one sex scene in that really popular American vampire book Eclipse.

And so, being me, you know what I scream: "OH EMM GEE! URYUU'S A CLOSET PERVERT!"

And so, being him, Mr. Lee stands up, looks at me, and says, "Hitsugaya-san, why are you shouting such immoralities?"

I looked at him, and, of course, being the devious captain that I am...oh dear, did I say devious? I fully meant intelligent and cunning. Although isn't cunning a negative disposition? Well, alright, if it is, which I don't know for sure, I'm going to leave it out and just say I am intelligent. ANYWAY, being the intelligent little boy that I am, I look at my marionette doll and say, "Dear, dear, have you been talking indecently again? I think it's time for you to go back into the backpack."

To add effect, I move the mouth of the doll to say, "Oh lord! Not the backpack! Anything but the backpack! Please, I beg of you -"

And, of course, go into a long rant about how he doesn't like the backpack because it's so small and confining and blah blah blah blah blah, and out of the corner of my eye I see Mr. Lee writing on a suspicious looking slip of paper. Then in the middle of my rant, which was just getting good, too, he stands up, walks over to my desk with the slip and a roll of tape, and tapes the paper over my mouth.

I mean, good God, do you not have respect for me?! If you had done that to Byakuya, Mr. Lee, you would be diced, cubed, and served up in stew so Byakuya could eat you for breakfast! (Please, I know the normal person does not have stew for breakfast, but Byakuya is far from what you would call a normal person. Also, Aruguealot, are you happy now? You'd better be. I don't know how else to appease you short of doing an awkward and degrading dance that would make my reputation here on Earth bad...and you wouldn't want that, now, would you?)

So now I'm here in detention. Again. You know, I may be setting a record here. But honestly, people, I don't think I deserve to be in detention for this. I was simply minding my own business, playing with myself...Oh Lord, that sounds wrong. For all you perverts out there, please, don't take that seriously. I don't actually play with myself. I meant, I just meant that I was playing with myself in terms of the doll that I made...but of course you won't believe me, so let's just move on from here. Nobody believes that I am actually just a sweet little innocent boy for some reason. Nobody. Come on, I am like, the poster child for innocence! Like I said, that doodle of Rangiku that I drew on the test was very ungraphical.

But yes, if stupid Uryuu hadn't bothered me like that, I would not be in here in the first place. Also, I think it's his fault that he had to be reading THAT one book, THAT one scene. If he had been reading any other page, I would not have shouted out like that and it would never have happened.

But maybe it's a good thing that I'm in detention. As far as I know, he's still ranting on in there, trying to justify how he's not a closet pervert.

But really, you and me both know he is, now don't we? This will make for good blackmail soon...(feel free to insert evil little demonic chuckle here)

August 30
Detention/The Mini Hell Inside Hell
Monday
Hitsugaya


How did you like it? This chapter was actually written more for Aruguealot than for anyone else really, but that's not the point. I know you want to click that lil button under these words, so go ahead! Do it! I dare you!

Also, NO FLAMES! IF YOU FLAME, ME AND SHIRO-CHAN WILL DICE YOU UP AND SERVE YOU IN A STEW TO BYAKUYA FOR BREAKFAST!

Catch ya later (giggles)
Skyskater
And Shiro-chan