Hi all! Well, here is the chapter with Bella's past. And I am WARNING you now, it is not happy. So here is a Tissue Warning, Violence Warning, AND LEMON Warning :) Gotta balance out the bad with the good. As usual S.M. owns Twilight and I just play with her toys. Hope you enjoy this chapter and see ya at the bottom...
Edward drops me off at the front entrance of the condos and heads to the liquor store for 'an ocean of booze' as he put it. I rush in and jump in the shower and change into some comfortable clothes. I sleep nude so I just threw on a pair of yoga pants and an oversized, off the shoulder t-shirt foregoing any underthings that way once Edward left I could easily (and drunkenly) remove the clothes and fall where ever it was I stopped.
I run in the kitchen to make a quick chicken dinner that I always have considered one of my comfort foods and it happened to be one of Edward's favorites as well. I made it one night for everyone while I was staying with Aro and his wife. Edward made himself sick eating so much of it. Maybe if he makes himself sick again tonight I won't have to have this talk with him…
About an hour after Edward had dropped me off I hear a key in the front door.
"Lucy, I'm home!" He sings out in a bad impression of Desi Arnez and puts his keys and bags of booze down on the entry way table.
"RICKEY!" I run into the living room and fling myself into his arms, he picks me up and I wrap my legs around his waist and instantly feel him harden his hands squeezing my ass.
"Fuck Bella, you are so…"
And there is that moment. You know that moment when all you want to do is kiss the hell out of someone. There it is and…..BUZZZZZZZZ… there it goes. The kitchen timer goes off breaking the spell. Edward puts me down and grabs the vodka and follows me into the kitchen after adjusting himself in his jeans.
"Oh Bella, is that your famous chicken skillet whatever the hell it's called?"
"Yes. I remember it is one of your favorites and one of my comfort foods so I threw it together real quick."
"The entire time Tanya and I were together, she never cooked me my favorite meals."
"She cooked?" I snort.
"Ok, never told our cook Rachel to make any of my favorite meals, hell, I don't think she even knows any of my favorites."
"Well, it's no big deal, you know me I love taking care of people so I just notice the little things."
"Bella, nothing you do is little to me. I have gone years without even the smallest things from her. With Tanya it is always take, take, take. If it doesn't benefit her in any way it doesn't enter her mind."
"I know what you mean, that's how Riley was."
"How did you get the courage to walk away?"
"Wow, we are starting the hard questions now huh?" I try to laugh.
"I didn't realize it was that hard of a question. I just meant that I am going through that and it's scary as hell."
"Oh, sorry, um…well…I'll tell you what, you sit down while I will fix our plates and drinks and we will start talking, everything from the beginning."
I get both plates ready, sit down take a big gulp of my vodka cranberry and a deep breath.
"OK, so Riley and I got together our senior year of high school. He was so carefree and so easy to care about and care for, take care of. We partied, a lot. I was the good girl, head in the books working my ass off for as many scholarships to get the hell out of Forks.
"Riley and I never ran in the same circles, I was a brain he was a jock who knew how to party. We ended up lab partners in Biology and then I ended up tutoring him and eventually started dating. In our drug induced stupidity we ran off the night after graduation and got married in Vegas. We had fun and things were good for a couple of years and then he cheated on me with Bree and we broke up for a while.
"We ended up getting back together, but I never truly trusted him again. Over the years we were together he was addicted to porn and internet dating sites, so he never got my trust back, but he didn't give a shit. He also still had a drug and alcohol problem, we both did but I quit. It quickly became obvious that someone had to be the adult. I mean still drink occasionally but nothing like before when I was with him and it has been years since I did any kind of drug.
"Riley's addictions turned him violent. He…he beat me, but never where anyone would see the bruises. I didn't have the courage to walk away, I was terrified of him. The year before we got divorced we got pregnant, again. I was so excited. We had such a hard time, I had multiple miscarriages and this one seemed to be sticking around past 6 weeks."
I take another drink, then another and refill my glass with more vodka than cranberry.
"Riley had been fucking a married woman he met online, Victoria, I had no idea or maybe I just didn't give a shit anymore, but between taking care of everything at home and I mean everything, bills, cleaning, car care, yard work, repairs, shopping, cooking. And add work, school, homework, study groups…well you went to law school you know, I had no idea this was going on…in my own fucking house! In my bed!
"Well Victoria was or is married to a man named James. He is a mean bastard. He found out about Victoria and Riley and decided to get revenge. He had been watching our house and following Riley and me around and figured since the way to punish him would be something happening to Victoria so he assumed, incorrectly, that the best way to punish Riley was for something to happen…to me."
Another couple of drinks and a refill.
"Oh, Bella, please no."
I hold my hand up to him and shake my head because I know if I stop now I will never get all of it out.
"I left work that Friday afternoon, Aro had left early and I was to close up and then I was headed to class, which was nothing unusual. James was waiting for me when I was walking to my car. He was nice at first, seemed sincere told me who he was and that his wife was having an affair with my husband that they had met online and been fucking for months. He asked if we could go somewhere for coffee and talk. I told him that I couldn't, I was late for class but I would look into what he told me. He looked so fucking destroyed, I apologized to him. I apologized to that sick motherfucker. He shook my hand, smiled and turned to walk away. I turned to get into my car and that's when he stuck the rag over my mouth. He had tortured me for a week and a half. It was Aro that reported me missing when I didn't show up for work on Monday morning and my car was still in the lot. Riley spent the whole weekend assuming I was busy with school and stayed in bed, my bed, with Victoria."
"Bella," Edward whispers as he leans over to wipe the tears from my face. I look at him and there are tears streaming down his face as well. I take another big drink and start again before I completely chicken out.
"For that week and a half, I was starved, beaten, raped and I…I miscarried. I was four and a half months pregnant. I delivered the baby alone in some abandoned garage. It was the fucking most painful thing I had ever done. I found some old rags and wrapped Bayleigh up and kept her hidden so James wouldn't find her. She was perfect even though she was so tiny she was perfectly formed and beautiful, so precious."
I completely lose it now, sobbing uncontrollably. Edward picks me up bridal style and carries me into my bedroom and goes back and get our glasses and both bottles of vodka and rushes back and holds me and kisses my head and until I calm down.
"Fuck Baby, I had no idea! You don't have to go on," he mumbles into my hair.
"No, I want to. It hurts like hell but it honestly helps finally talking to someone about it."
"OK, but only if you want to and you stop anytime you need to I don't need to hear everything."
I give him a small smile, take a huge drink straight from our bottle and snuggle into his embrace.
"Aro was going absolutely crazy, he shut the office down and spent all his time at the police station and out looking. He wouldn't let them give up. He beat the shit out of Riley too. Damn near put him in the hospital right alongside of me. It was Aro that the police called when they found me and he met the ambulance at the hospital."
Drink.
"James would go to work every day and go about his life like nothing was amiss, but he would spend his lunch hour and then all night until the next morning with me. He was at work when I was found. I would spend those hours he was at work just cradling Bayleigh, singing to her, talking to her, apologizing to her for not being able to protect her."
Drink.
"When they found me I was delirious from a fever because an infection had set in from the miscarriage, James never stopped raping me even though I was bleeding. He loved it, said it got him off more with all the blood than it did before."
Several more drinks. I am so going to pay for this in the morning.
"I was so scared that between Riley and James I would have gotten some weird STD, but I have been religious in getting tested every six months for the last two and a half years. Thankfully, I am clean. I was so scared.
"It was Aro who took Bayleigh from me at the emergency room, promised me he would make sure she was taken care of like the little princess she was. He was sobbing so hard you would think she was his child. He personally carried her down to the morgue, he didn't trust anyone else with her. I know you don't care for Sulpicia but she was a godsend to me, she planned Bayleigh's funeral she even hand sewed the little gown she was buried in."
I get up and walk over to my dresser and pull out a box from the bottom drawer then hand it to Edward. It is my memory box that Sulpicia put together for me. He sobs with me as he looks through everything and then we drink some more. We are well into the second bottle by now.
Sulpicia took pictures of Bayleigh in her dress and little casket. It is only the last few months that I have been able to open the envelope she put the pictures in and actually look at them.
"Bella, she is perfect. Beautiful just like her mom," Edward whispers as he gently runs his finger down a picture of her face like he was caressing her little cheek.
Another drink.
"They didn't know if I would survive or not the damage and infection was so severe. While I was in the hospital Aro hired movers to pack and move all my things into storage except my clothes and personal stuff which he moved to his house. Riley came home to an empty house, his clothing destroyed in the bedroom and the movers even took the toilet paper, light bulbs and all the food was donated to a local battered women's shelter. That was the reason I was at your Uncle's house that first Christmas when everyone was there. I had been there for several months by then and Aro and Sulpicia wouldn't hear of me leaving and frankly it was nice being taken care of for once. But I wasn't Aro's new lover or Sulpicia's either. I wasn't the third in their kinky threesome like so many were accusing me of, I mean of course I know you knew that, but still. And the rest from there you know," I shrug my shoulders and refuse to look at him.
He takes a big drink and puts his hand under my chin to pull my face up to look at him.
"You just made my need to protect you that much stronger, Baby. I can't let anything ever upset you again. You are just too precious to me."
"You're drunk Edward," I slurred.
"Very and so are you Puss, now onto sexy stuff," he wiggles his eyebrows, "How the fuck do you know Jasper?"
"Well, I wasn't getting laid at home, obviously," I had started really slurring by now, "So Angel…or Ang as you know her, told me about this website that had dirty erotic stories, YUM! Her and Jessi was addicted and they know my love for writing so they shared their little secret.
"Ang and Jess were trying to get me focused on something else since I refused to talk to them about what had happened…I…I just couldn't. It was the only way they could think of to help me. So, I signed up for a free membership, I even started writing as well, that's another secret you don't know, I am a bad writer." I am giggling now.
"Anyway, I got a random email from another author on the site telling me he was doing research for a new story and put in the criteria of the type of women he wanted to ask questions for research, and I came up first so he emailed wanting to know if I was willing to answer some questions for him. I thought what the hell. Damn the questions he asked. But simple answers yes or no answers weren't good enough, he wanted to know why I answered the way I did. That started our relationship.
"It evolved from there and I fell in love with the sorry motherfucker. FELL IN LOVE with someone I never met. Someone I knew nothing about, except all that mattered. I didn't know his last name, what he did for a living, I knew he was rich and I knew what he wanted in a woman and I know his girlfriend wasn't that. He told me I was. Me!
"Once he told me to move Arizona to Washington DC I told him I would get right on it and asked him what he would do if I was that good. He told me he would marry me because I made him want to settle down. I'm here now, I did it, I moved Arizona to DC and he is settling down, but with some whore not with me! Shit, did I say that out loud?"
"Yes Belly you did, quite loud actually."
"He didn't know everything about me though, he doesn't know that I am a writer, wait, yes he does. He knew I had a bad marriage but didn't know Riley was abusing me. He knew that Riley acted more like a child than an adult and that I was really tired of being unappreciated and treated like a random hole for him to dip his dick in with no consideration as to my pleasure.
"Jasper and I broke up or whatever the fuck we did way before James. We sent pictures and texts and emails and phone calls every day. Every fucking day! I would wake up to his texts and go to sleep with them, then one day, poof, nothing. Then another and another and another and then three years later still nothing. So fuck him! And now he keeps calling me his and he is my cowboy, he says stuff that makes me want to run right back to him, who cares if he is engaged. But if I can re…re…resist you, I can resist anyone because you are seriously fuck hawt."
My hand may have possibly been running up underneath his shirt enjoying those tight abs…FUCK I am screwed!
"What if I can't resist you Bella? The shit you do to me. You are so fucking playful and so expressive with your emotions and physical, God I love having you in my arms. When you jump into my arms and wrap yourself around me. Do you know how long it's been since I have had sex? Going on YEARS! That Christmas at Aro's was the last time I fucked."
"HA! I beat you! It's been over 3 for me. I am so fucking horny it's not even funny. Vibrators and dildos just don't cut it anymore. I need a big hard cock to be deep inside me, pounding…."
Edward cuts me off with a demanding kiss. He runs his hands up my thighs. His hands cupped my ass before sliding down inside the waistband of my yoga pants and he finds I am not wearing any panties. I lean into him and straddle his lap and his fingers move down my ass and the tip of one of them enters me, circling slowly as he groans. My hands are fisted in his hair while he kisses my neck and uses his thumb to spread moisture over my clit. My hips start to move, and I am riding his fingers as I whimper. I throw my head back and close my eyes enjoying the touch of a man for the first time in several years.
"God Edward, I am gonna cum!"
"NO, not yet, I want to taste you when you cum."
He pushes me down so I am lying on the bed and before I realize it he has my pants thrown across the room and his head buried between my thighs.
"FUCK!" I scream and grab onto his hair pulling him closer to me. Damn the way he uses his tongue. It's no time before I am on the brink again.
"Cum now, baby. I need to you cum in my mouth. Cum Bella!"
He latches back on my clit and bites down and it's all over.
"EDDDDDDWARD FUUUUUUCK!"
He crawls back up my body and takes my t-shirt with him.
"Damn, baby. I can't even remember the last time I ate pussy. Fuck yours is so amazing, I will never get enough."
He kisses me and I can taste myself on his tongue and I start sucking his tongue then licking his lips and face.
"Fuck baby, that's so fucking hot. You like the taste of yourself on me then?"
"I like the taste of you I am just a little added bonus."
"Damn I could fall in love with you."
"Same here, now fuck me. Hard Edward, I need you to fuck me like you need to. Don't hold back, don't make love to me. I need you rough Edward."
He was shaking so bad he couldn't get his pants undone. All the years I was with Riley in high school and the first few years of our marriagew, I don't think we once fucked sober so I am practically an expert at drunk undressing. I rolled him over so he was on his back and undid his belt and jeans. FUCK no underwear! I started licking and sucking his cock before I even got his pants all the way unzipped. I grab the waistband of his jeans and start yanking. He lifts his hips so I can pull them down to his knees. I have my mouth attached to his cock and use my feet to push his jeans all the way off.
"Fuck Bella!"
He lifts his hips and grabs my head and pushes me all the way down. Thank God I don't have a gag reflex because he is HUGE! And he is having no reservations about fucking my throat, hard. Damn I love it.
"Get off baby, I am going to cum. I want to cum in your pussy," he growls. Growls! FUCK ME…well apparently that's exactly what he is going to do!
He pulls my up by my hair and flips me over on my back and slams his cock deep inside of me.
"FUCK!" We both yell at the same time.
He attacks my breasts and sucks and bites the left one while squeezing and pinching the nipple on my right then licks his way across to the right one. I wrap my legs around his waist and meet him thrust for thrust. He moves his hands down my sides and grabs my ass and squeezes as he lifts me up and fuck if he isn't hitting a spot I didn't even know I had!
"OH God, Baby. Harder, fuck me harder I am so close! You are hitting the spot just hit it harder!"
He had sweat dripping off his body onto mine and my sweat was mixing with his and running down onto the bed.
"I fucking hope you are close baby because I can't hold off much longer. I need you to cum Bella."
He was going to let me cum first?! What? That has never happened to me before and that apparently along with a very hard thrust had me exploding all over his cock. I could do nothing but scream. No words, no thoughts just utter pleasure.
"FUCK BELLA!" Edward made a few more thrusts then stilled inside me when he finally lets himself go. I can feel myself still quivering and squeezing him as he holds onto my hips, his fingers digging into my flesh but he isn't breathing. Just…just enjoying. I lay here looking up at him.
"Fuck you are beautiful, Edward," I whisper. At least I think it's a whisper.
He opens his eyes and gives me that crooked grin of his and leans over and kisses the shit out of me.
"No one could be a breathtaking as you, especially are right this moment, Puss. You are gorgeous."
We lay here kissing for a long time and I can feel him get hard inside me again and I realize he never pulled out. I push him off of me and we both groan at the loss, but I push him onto his back and lick all the way down to his cock and take it into my mouth once again. This time I won't stop until I make him cum down my throat.
WELL...whatcha think? Good? Bad? Should I run for cover?
Thanks to everyone who added me and/or DC to their favorites and followed me/it. I so appreciate it!
inge80 - Jasper does need to drop Alice and the sooner he does the better! Bella and Jasper will have a face to face conversation soon but it won't get everything out in the open, but maybe just enough for a little more drama :)
VioletDream13 - I am so glad I can make you laugh! I have to admit I giggle while writing this too. I am so excited you enjoyed Jasper's POV and oh so sorry it wasn't long enough (I agree), hopefully this one made up for it. I also have another chapter in JPOV coming up that I had to split into 2 chapters.
Mickeyluver33 - Have at it, crawl around but I can't be held responsible for what you find! HAHA!
lmb1 - Jasper does have a lot to prove but the poor guy got the shit shocked out of him having Bella show up out of the blue but he will start to figure it out and prove his worth :)
The-Majors-Keeper - I love Charlotte also! Thank you, Sam. RL is still crazy. My son broke his hand 2 weeks ago, graduated HS last week and just this last Monday passed out at work and ended up with a concussion & chipped collar bone. Needless to say I have visited my 'happy place' (my stories) quite often this week! I hope you enjoyed this chapter!
ellaryne - Poor Jasper is so confused, he doesn't know what to expect! He will figure it out but it will take a few kicks in the ass :)
RosalieMcKay - Thank you, I am so excited you love it so much! I believe having Jasper walk in on some PDA would be hilarious, I will work that in some where :)
Wastedpain - Haha! I think I want to humiliate Alice before I blow her up ;) And Jasper will be getting several kicks to the ego. I think we can see about you having Edward, he will be looking soon!
kathymoonestone - Yep, Bella doesn't know exactly what she wants but she doesn't want to jump back into Jasper's life. Well...she does but he is engaged and she is going to 'try' to be good. Although she wasn't being too good in this chapter with Edward so...
See ya Wednesday :)
~Shasta
