A/N: Hullo~! Idk how long it's been since the last update, but here~!
Enjoy this chapter. I think you all will. Except for some skeptics. But rest assured. I will explain some things later.
Please enjoy. I dare you to try to read this whole chapter with smiling!
It Had to be You © Motion City Soundtrack
Do you feel a certain sense of synergy
Between yourself and me
A kind of macabre
And somber
Wonder twin type of harmony?
Light gave L a disbelieving look. "Sexual frustration? Are you kidding me?" He grinned. "Sorry Ryuuzaki, but if I ever wanted some action, all I'd have to do is say the word. I have plenty of women drooling at my feet who would do whatever I asked." He stated simply. Light looked up at L, chuckling. "When was the last time you got laid?"
"Says the guy who had a wet dream about me… Anyways, this conversation is very inappropriate. In any case, it doesn't matter when the last time I've had sexual intercourse is. I have it regularly, I will say, but I'd prefer it if we changed the subject," L lied smoothly. He'd maybe had sex once?- or was it twice? He didn't know. He'd been younger and hornier at the time. "If you continue on the subject, I may tell your father."
Light rolled his eyes, but didn't continue on the subject. It was obviously a touchy matter, considering Ryuuzaki's haste to change the subject. "Mhm. So… how come you eat so much sugar?" He asked, hoping to get the answer to the question that'd been pressing at him since he'd seen the array of sickening delicacies.
"Sugar keeps my brain functioning. It is the vital item the brain needs. If I were to stop eating sweets, my deductive abilities would drop, indubitably," L answered, glad to change the subject. "Anyways, let's talk about your discovery of me being Ryuuzaki. Is there a reason you decided to simply admit that you knew everything?"
Light shrugged. "I wanted to." He answered simply. Personally, L's explanation made some sense, though Light didn't see how sugar was very vital. Light didn't stuff himself with sugar and artificial flavors all day, but he was still pretty damn smart.
L continued devouring his multiple desserts in record time before answering Light. "Surely you must've known there'd be repercussions for that? Especially for saying I'm not smart enough to solve the case. I should have you stoned. Or, better yet, I should spank you with a cricket bat."
Light looked over at Ryuuzaki. "Of course I knew! Why else would I have said what I'd said?" he asked, laughing slightly. "And if you get near my butt, I think I just might have to kill you," he added.
"You really hurt my ego, you know… Peoples' thoughts really get to me. That is exactly why I have the mannerisms that I do." L said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. Then, on a lighter note, he asked, "Anyways, I'm not quite sure what to do with you. Do you have any suggestions?"
Light shrugged. "You could let me go." He suggested, though he knew that L wouldn't take that into serious consideration. "What do you think you should do with me?" He asked.
"I was asking you. The question was 'what should I do with you' not, 'what could I do with you," L clarified, not liking Light's attitude. "I want you to think of a logical, serious reprimand I should decide upon. Put yourself in my shoes."
Something didn't make sense to L. Soichiro had said that Light thought L was his idol. Light's dream further proved his respect for L. Surely that couldn't have been faked? Light was asleep after all, and he had an erection when he woke up. "If I'm your idol, why aren't you showing me much respect?"
Light sighed. Why was Ryuuzaki so insistent on making Light believe that he was L? "Because I don't believe you, that's why," he answered honestly. "Why should I take your word for something as serious as that?"
L thought over Light's response. It was very logical. There wasn't much proof to the fact that L was… L. And anyways, it made sense to think that L wouldn't look or act the way he did. A lot of people thought L was refined and aristocratic when they hadn't met him personally, which L understood.
"What would it take to prove my identity?" L asked. He truly wanted to prove that he was L, which was strange for him. He was usually covering up that fact. Maybe Light would respect him more if only he believed L was L… It shouldn't have mattered to L whether Light respected him or not, but it did, and L didn't like it. He couldn't help his desires, though. He was a very spoiled person and got everything he wanted.
Light pondered over that for a moment. What would it take to know if Ryuuzaki was indeed L? He rather hoped that Ryuuzaki was just a lying bastard, but he had to be sure. "You could always take me to your headquarters." He responded simply. It was the easiest, though probably the most flawed way to find out. He could always check with his father as well, if he wanted to. Though, if Ryuuzaki was L, he had a feeling that the identity of his boss wouldn't be quite so easily given away.
"Or maybe some old case files under your name, or maybe some information on the Clocker case that only a high-class detective would be able to achieve. Perhaps some letters addressed to L… Of course, those things were probably confidential, but that made Light all the more eager to see just how long Ryuuzaki would be able to pull this off.
L scarfed down the last of his desserts. He washed them all down with the rest of the sickly-sweet coffee and slammed the mug down on the table. He wouldn't show Light cases under his name. Those were classified, after all. The urge to show Light proof was intense, though. Taking Light to the headquarters wasn't a good idea either because L would have a headquarters whether he was L or just a guy named Ryuuzaki.
"Ah, here's a thought: We could fornicate, and if I perform to the standards you dream L has, then you can only conclude that I am L," L offered, though it wasn't a serious offer. If he kept throwing out wildly ridiculous ideas, then maybe Light would agree to a smaller one; one that L could actually do.
Light coughed rather loudly, giving Ryuuzaki a disbelieving look. What was he thinking?! "… Sorry to disappoint you, but I think I'll have to pass." He declined.
"Then perhaps you could choose some other form that I could prove my identity to you."
Light laughed. "Alright then… Then in that case… I would like you to stand on this table on one foot, rub your stomach with one hand, pat your head with the other, and yodel like a goatherd," he suggested.
L stared blankly at Light. There were several things wrong with Light's request. Firstly, it was too easy. Second, it wouldn't prove L was L. Third, L would look like a fool. However, if this would help even a little bit, that was fine with L.
So, without much hesitation, he cleared a space on the table for him to stand on. Then he hopped from the chair to the table top, landing on one foot. He put his hands in place, then, and began their motions. Lastly, to top it all off, L began yodeling as if he were a Swede.
Light fought to hold back his laughter as he observed this sight that he would probably never see again in his entire life. Here and there, he would release a snicker or two, but he managed to keep himself under a decent amount of control.
Once L had completed Light's request, Light grinned, still chuckling. "Alright then Ryuuzaki, thank you. Now, how about a tennis match? If you win, I'll agree to you being L, and if you lose, I never want to see you again. Agreed?"
L stopped what he was doing immediately after hearing Light's new offer. This one was more serious, and something L could definitely do. "Agreed. However, I should warn you that can't win against me no matter how hard you try. I'm exceptional at tennis."
Light raised an eyebrow. "Oh? I'm afraid I have to say the same about myself." He countered. Oh yes, he was looking forward to this match.
--
The pair left the café and headed straight towards the community park, which was fairly large. Light flashed his membership card, and he told L to pick out a tennis court while he rented the rackets and tennis balls. After handing the cashier the required yen, Light headed over to the courts and met L, handing him a racket and setting the container of tennis balls down while taking one out.
"And so it begins." Light muttered, gripping the ball a bit harder than necessary and taking in a silent breath. Exhaling, Light tossed the ball up in the air, and sent the ball whizzing towards Ryuuzaki.
--
Light couldn't help but stare at Ryuuzaki while the tennis ball rolled up to meet the fence. For a while, Light simply stood there, shocked and rather confused. Nobody ever beat him. Ever.
… Did this mean that Ryuuzaki really was L? He certainly hoped not, and though Light hated to admit it, he'd lost, and now he'd have to suffer the consequences. But… If Ryuuzaki really was L, then Light's opinion of L was starting to waver. Of course, he'd still greatly admire L for his work, services, and major accomplishments, but Ryuuzaki… was not quite what he'd expected L to be like. He'd imagined L with a bit more taste, knowledge for what he should and should not eat, and just down often he should take a shower. Light did note the slight gleam to Ryuuzaki's hair, but he shrugged it off as being sweat. After all, the game was fairly rigorous. But the L in Light's mind and the man claiming to be L in real life clashed, and while some parts, including the fact that Ryuuzaki did have brains, seemed to somewhat match his imaginary 'L picture', there were just some parts that just didn't fit quite right.
L was supposed to be cool, calculating, and working any situation to his advantage. While Ryuuzaki did do this as well, Light wasn't expecting it to be done in such a childish, trivial manner, and a bit of security other than some old man would've been a bit more convincing. Some sort of heavy debate would've been a much more preferred method of choosing if Ryuuzaki was L, and he was mentally shooting himself in the head for not thinking of it earlier. Now he was stuck in a hole; he'd made the conditions himself, and he'd been beaten at his own game, which was, in a word, unperceived and most certainly displeasing.
Some sort of heavy debate would've been a much more preferred method of choosing if Ryuuzaki was L, and he was mentally shooting himself in the head for not thinking of it earlier. Now he was stuck in a hole; he'd made the conditions himself, and he'd been beaten at his own game, which was, in a word, unperceived and most certainly displeasing.
"Okay, L, now what?" Light asked, daring to stare at Ryuuzaki. He refused to address him as L in his mind quite yet, but he would have to suffer verbally.
L was silent. He fingered at his tennis racket a little bit, not quite sure how to act in this situation. Then, without trying to sound as if he were smacking Light over the head with the words, he spoke.
"Do you truly believe I am L, now? If this isn't convincing enough, then perhaps you could tell me what is."
L hoped Light wouldn't take the words the wrong way. The detective truly wanted Light to believe that he was L. He wanted Light to respect him, and look up to him. He wanted Light's acceptance. L's reasoning was that if he got Light to accept him as such an impressive being, that the teenager would take a liking to him.
It was superficial to like someone just because of their reputation, but L didn't know how else he could get Light to like him. After all, the teenager didn't have much interest in anything or anyone. The only people he truly liked were his family. L didn't really fit in with the Yagami family, so the next best thing was to impress Light with his reputation. It was a long shot, but it would be worth it if it worked.
"…" Light was silent for a moment, thinking over what Ryuuzaki had said. Was he saying this to make fun of Light? If Ryuuzaki really was L, then he'd probably have an ego rivaling Light's own, and the remark would make some sense. On the other hand, he could be asking that question honestly, though Light was a bit unsure why it was so important that Ryuuzaki was L, unless he was just hunting after some of Light's ass, which he really hoped wasn't the case.
But then again, who else could possibly beat the famous Light Yagami? He was undoubtedly the best in Japan, and perhaps the world. Nobody had ever beaten him, and even those who put up a fight paled in comparison to Light's skill. L was a perfect being, just as Light was, so wouldn't that be reason enough to make Ryuuzaki L?
Now that Light had put it into perspective, he deemed that it was.
"…Yes…" He muttered quietly, but loud enough to where Ryuuzaki- L- would be able to hear it. Color lightly spread over his cheeks, from the workout and from the frustration that he'd been beaten at his own game.
"Good. I'm glad you believe me." L didn't listen to a word he had said. He was too focused on Light's hair. It shined a bronze in the sun, and no substance on Earth looked to be as soft. L felt the unbearable urge to tousle Light's hair. If he did that, though, Light would probably throw a fit and tell him not to touch his hair.
Light frowned when L refused to make eye contact with Light. Why couldn't he look Light in the eye? Was there something wrong with him? Light certainly hoped not, because if Ryuuzaki really was L, then being anything below perfect was not an option.
"What, is there something in my hair?" Light asked, fighting back the urge to smooth it out. While Light was conscious about his appearance, he was not self-conscious.
"Of course not," L responded, "It's perfect as usual." The detective decided that it would be best to look Light in the eye, which wasn't a step down in any way at all. Light's eyes were gorgeous, now that L could see them closely. Of course, what else could be expected from Light Yagami? So L gazed into Light's eyes dreamily, barely able to keep himself from walking up to Light and just staring at his eyes.
Good lord, what was wrong with L? Even with a teensy, tiny crush, L shouldn't be all gaga over a pretty face. It wasn't L! But Light was just so perfect… The side of L that wanted to ogle Light won and the other part of him was glazed over in the splendor of Light Yagami.
Light almost smiled when L complimented him, but after years of being complimented it, the leap of joy wasn't quite as dramatic as it would've been a few years back. He was glad that L was looking him in the eye, but the rather dazed look in those large, black eyes was a bit unsettling. What was the deal now?
"… Hello?" He asked, wondering if he should wave a hand in front of L's face.
L didn't mind being interrupted in his gazing. Light's voice was as perfect as the rest of him, after all. The detective shook his head lightly, showing Light that he was "awake," kind of. L's eyes traveled over the rest of Light's face. There wasn't a flaw or disproportional mark or shape anywhere. It was as if God himself had crafted Light. One thing about Light's face did stick out to L, though.
Light's lips seemed to be calling out to L without movement or sound. They looked so soft and perfect in shape and color. The urge to answer the call of Light's lips grew tremendously. However, L's many years of amazing self-control kicked in. So, instead of going directly for a kiss, L had a different plan.
"What's the percentage chance of you letting me kiss you?" he asked politely. If anyone had seen L at that moment, they would've thought he was a panda begging for bamboo.
Light almost took a step back in his surprise, but it was shown clearly on his face.
"Uh…" He wasn't exactly expecting to hear a comment like that, especially from L. While he was flattered, and his dream certainly made it seem rather… pleasurable… having L, another man, one he'd only met once before, kissing him, in public, where anyone who walked by could see, wasn't really all that appealing.
"Not very high." He answered truthfully. Ryuuzaki wasn't terribly ugly, but he wasn't godly in appearance, and on top of that, the risk of being seen kissing another man in public was much too high to risk.
L narrowed his eyes at Light, his fuzzy feelings of the teen's glamour gone. Light was supposed to accept and then kiss L until he went into a coma from so much excitement. However, Light had rejected him and denied L the pleasure of a kiss. L was having none of this. L always got his way. No ands, ifs or buts.
"How funny," L dryly said, "because that wasn't a friendly request. I always get what I want." Then, without another word, L dropped his tennis racket, quickly cupped Light's cheeks so he couldn't look away, and then planted a kiss directly on Light's lips.
Light's eyes widened as his lips were met by L's. They were warm, rather soft, and relatively pleasant-feeling. His hand froze, his racket clattering to the floor.
Oh god oh god oh god.
L was kissing him. In public.
"W-what do you think you're doing?!" he hissed, trying not to draw attention to himself as he shoved L away from him. He staggered back, hastily wiping his lips and staring at L in disbelief. His heart rate must've tripled, and he was seriously considering running away at that moment. While he held L in a high place in his mind, Light was his own person and he would choose who got to do what to it.
L couldn't keep the grin that formed on his face. Even if it was a one-sided kiss, the feeling of Light's lips against L's was just amazing. L's euphoria at this point could be compared to a high off of illegal drugs. The detective could barely form a sentence of three words.
"I kissed you." L's grin broadened.
Light stared at L as though he was insane.
"What the hell?!" he demanded, "are you fucking crazy?! This is a PUBLIC AREA! With PEOPLE!"
L snapped out of his stupor as Light yelled at him. "So you're saying that if we weren't in public, you'd kiss me willingly?" The discovery of this was like the discovery of the cure for cancer for L.
Light mentally face palmed. "That's not what I meant!" He fought not to stammer over his word, as he was still a bid dazed in the aftermath of that rather unexpected kiss. "I wouldn't let you kiss me no matter where we are! You'd be lucky if I didn't tell my father about this, or you'd be a dead man walking!" He jabbed L in the chest with a finger.
L removed Light's finger from his chest as he went back to his normal L state. "Your father could do nothing to me. Anyways, it was one kiss, so get over it." Thinking over his actions now, L hoped his reckless, thoughtless actions wouldn't affect Light's opinion of him. He hoped there was still a slim chance that Light would like him.
"I apologize for the kiss if it really upset you so much," L said nonchalantly.
Light wasn't quite ready to just leave it at that. "Yes! It did upset me! I said no and you didn't listen to me! What makes you think that apologizing will do any difference?! You can't just go around kissing guys in public because you want to!" He fought to keep his voice at a normal level. To be quite honest, he was getting quite fed up with L, and he was more than eager to leave and hopefully never make contact with L ever again.
A frown made its way on L's face. "Apologizing is something people do when they regret something, not to fix something. I regret upsetting Yagami-kun. And, no, I don't go around kissing guys in public. In fact, that was my first kiss. Thank you for making it special for me." L rolled his eyes. He already knew that he'd made a dumb mistake, so Light didn't have to rub it in. Then again, Light would do anything to protect his pride, and if belittling L got the job done, Light would probably do it.
"Yagami-kun, I was hoping to meet you to see if the percentage of you being behind the Clockers Case would decrease at all, but I would have to say it might have increased a little bit." L just wanted to leave. If Light already disliked him, there was no point in even trying. It may have been quitter talk, but L had never been good with getting people to like him.
Light crossed his arms, rolling his eyes. "Well then, you aren't forgiven." He sighed, turning around. "Thank you for the wonderful chat." With that, he began to walk away. If only he'd just gotten to see that stupid movie with his date…
L watched Light go. He didn't try to stop the teenager; he didn't feel like it. He'd already made enough of a fool out of himself today. So, completely ignoring the rackets on the floor and the tennis balls he'd borrowed, L left the park. The ride back to headquarters was silent and pathetic.
The other members of the task force greeted L warmly and asked about the meeting with Light, but L pretended not to hear them.
In reality, most of the meeting wasn't about the Clocker's Case at all, which was like double jeopardy for L. He'd acted solely on whim, though he knew that what he was doing wasn't risky; it just wasn't the best thing to do at the time. L had acted extremely far out of his element and had gotten bad results.
L learned something that day as he tried and failed to focus on the case. He learned that Light was an asshole. An asshole that L loved.
What if it was you?
You that I needed all along
I felt like a fool
Kicking and screaming
And pretending we were wrong
A/N: Yay! Okay, so, yeah o.o Anyways. I know the fangirl/boy sides of you are all smiley inside, and then the skeptic parts are like NOOOOOOO. I know that L got very OOC, but it will fit and flow with the following chapters without being OOC quite nicely. I swear.
Anyways, happy Halloween to all and happy birthday to L~! Without him, this fic wouldn't be possible. So let us all take a moment of silence to honor L and his old man-ish-ness.
…
Moment over! Reviews are amazingly awesome to us and inspire us to continue! Faves and alerts are also amazing. Hope you all had a nice Halloween!
