A/N: This chapter has been bugging me for months and I've written a whole bunch of other chapters to follow after this one,so now I'm just going to post it like this. To make up for it I can promise a fast(er) update:)
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"So, how long are you going to lay around like this?"
Hidan was sitting next to Itachi on the edge of Deidara's bed. The silver-head had found him standing outside the door to Deidara's room, not quite daring to enter, and resolutely pulled him inside. Itachi suspected he was trying to hide from Kakuzu.
Deidara shrugged as best he could with half his body paralysed.
"Sasori-san said he gave me a long-lasting poison so I'd have a lot of time to 'contemplate my stupidity'. But he reckons it will wear off in a week or two."
Hidan snorted.
"Idiot."
"I guess I'm lucky he didn't turn me into a puppet, yeah?"
"He turns people into puppets?" Hidan frowned. "Fucking gross."
"It is not gross!" Deidara protested indignantly. "It's art."
"Freak."
"They are kind of beautiful," the blonde said defensively, adding after a moment's thought: "But they did look so much better when they exploded." He sighed wistfully. "I wish he'd let me do that more often. He could be like my danna."
"Danna?" Hidan looked sceptical, while Itachi made a small sound that might have been laughter.
"Yeah, you know how a geisha can have a danna who supports them and provides them with means to pursue their arts?"
"So you're comparing yourself to a geisha?"
"Off course," Deidara tried to sit up straighter, an enthusiastic gleam in his eye, "they're all devoted artists and spend their whole lives-"
"You're a girl," Hidan grinned and Deidara stopped mid-sentence to glare at him.
"You're a philistine."
"You're still a girl."
"You're lucky I'm paralysed. And you too," He turned angrily to Itachi, "or I'd have bombed you a long time ago for hanging around outside my door every day just to mock me."
Itachi's eyes narrowed slightly.
"Oh, you're going to use your almighty Sharingan on me now, yeah?" Deidara fired up, "well, just you try, because when this poison wears off I'm going to-"
"Jeeze, cool it, Deidara-chan," Hidan looked amused, "the guy hasn't even done anything. Because you don't hang around outside his room every day, do you?" He added sceptically to Itachi.
The Uchiha gave him a dark glare, which made Hidan's eyes widen in amazement.
"You do?" A broad grin spread across his face. "Oh, isn't that cute? He's looking out for his little sister."
Deidara opened his mouth to yell at him, but closed it again in fear as Itachi's eyes suddenly turned bright red. He gave the terrified-looking Hidan a warning glare before standing up and abruptly leaving the room.
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A/N: Everything I know about geisha and dannas comes from this article: .org/wiki/Geisha#Personal_relationships_and_danna
So if I'm wrong, just blame wiki.
