DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN ANYTHING.
DATE: Nov 8th 2007
NOTE: I would like to apoliogize to everyone who has been reading this. Through many faults a lot of which are my own I'll make no excuses for myself, this story has halted to a dead stop for well over a year. Being a big comic book fan who gets pissed off at the delays that some books get I know how it feels. At the same time though that just makes me a even bigger jackass for not updating for so long. Anyways time for the good news. This is a brand spanking new chapter, and not only that A LOT of stuff happens in this one, its much bigger then the others, my pathetic way of saying I'm sorry I guess. Also you won't have to wait so long until your next fix, I have wanted to finish this story since I started writing it and as of right now thats exctally what I plan to do. I don't know how many more chapters will be needed to finish it, that will work itself out as I go but rest assured it will be done. Thank you to everyone out there who never abbondended this little story of mine. Hopefully I can finish it soon and start something else that will get a response half as good as the one I have received as this one has.
The Love Round-Up:
Jericho
loves Stephanie
Stephanie loves Jericho
Batista loves
Trish
Trish loves Cena
Cena loves Stacy
Stacy loves
Orton
Orton loves Orton
Romeo loves All the guys
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EVERYBODY
LOVES SOMEBODY CHAPTER 8: "Romeo just
stole my ass flower, and it REALLY
hurts!"
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Batista was awake at 7:00 just as he had planned. As usual his alarm clock didnt fail him. He was up before anyone else just like he knew he would be, no way these lazy slugs would be up yet. Batista made his way to the bathroom, he had drank an additional couple glasses of water last night just to assure that he would be up early. The alarm clock may have been realible but in this house it could of easily been unplugged by any of the seemingly endless supply of assholes that inhabbited it. The water may not of been needed but it didnt matter anyways he was up earlier then everyone by at least an hour and now it was time to drain the tank before moving on to the kitchen. After finishing up in the bathroom he did a quick hand wash and opened the door to see everyone else in the house awake and moving about.
"What the hell are you all doing awake so early!?" Batista yelled to the closest person, who just so happened to be John Cena.
"Everyone gets up at 8:00 yo, whats the big deal?" Cena said.
"8:00!?! What the hell are you talking about Cena its only 7:00!" Batista yelled grabbing Cena by the shirt and shoving him up against the wall. Cena simply looked at Batista's extremely angry face then casually removed Batista's shaking hands from his shirt, a basketball jeresy that most likely represented the city where this stupid show was being filmed.
"Its daylight savings dawg, you forgot to fix your clock didnt you?" Cena said with a smile. Batista slapped his forhead.
"DAYLIGHT SAVINGS!?! DAMNIT ALL TO HELL!!!!" Batista said scurring away to the kicthen but it was to late, the room was already in full use by the likes of Stacy, Stephanie, and Romeo. At this sight Batista sighed a mighty sigh of defeat, lowered his head and left the room, Trish's breakfast would have to wait another day.
"DAMMIT IF IT WASNT FOR ALL THAT WATER I WOULD HAVE FULL CONTROL OF THE KITCHEN!!!!" Batista yelled. Everyone in the kitchen were perplexed by this but quickly went back to there business. Romeo was enjoying the morning newspaper, Stephanie a bowl of the finest ceral that could be found in the house, Lucky Charms, no doubt a pratical joke from her newest family member, Hornswoggle. Stacy however was just staring at Romeo the man that stole her precious Randy Orton away from her the night before.
"You know what Romeo, I should really kick your ass!" Stacy said. Romeo looked her way and smiled.
"And lord knows with those beautiful legs of your you can do it from there Romeo said completely jealous of Stacys legs, He had tried everything on his own legs but they were sadly as good as they were going to get, he would attract no husband with those eyesores. Stacy however not seeing the complment that had just grown even more angry at the homewrecker and jumped over the table at him starting the first catfight of the house. Stephanie who was in prime position to stop her merely shrugged and went back to her ceral. She hated to admit it but this non-gormay stuff that the lowly commoners ate wasnt as bad as she thought it was going to be, in fact she found that she actually enjoyed the marshmellows quite a bit. If anyone asked though she would obviously lie about that fact. It was then that Chris Jericho entered the room. He took a quick look at Stacy and Romeos cat fight, which he naturally assumed was over Randy Orton and shook his head. He stepped over the both of them and sat next to Stephanie.
"Lucky Charms again?" Jericho asked, half amused by the fact that the mighty and powerful Stephanie McMahon was reduced to this cereal.
"Yeah so what? Its all we have." Stephanie said jumping on the defence right away.
"Hey I got nothing against Lucky Charms, I have a T-shirt that promotes it in fact." Jericho stated.
"Really?" Stephanie asked, she had no idea they would put such a silly thing on a T-Shirt that wasnt on yeah in fact the Wikipedia page about me used to have a picture of me wearing it so I cant even deny owning it." Jericho said, a little sad that the website was invading his non-rock star apperal. If It were up to him he would have everyone believe that everything he owned was as shiney and flashy as that silver button up shirt that he used to wear years ago.
"Thats funny Chris, I never would of thought you would wear something so... un-flashy." Stephanie said.
"Right anyways, the reason I'm here right now is because I wanted to know if you have seen Batista anywhere." Jericho said.
"Dave? Oh yeah he was here just a few minutes ago got upset about water and not being alone in the kitchen, then he left." Stephanie said.
"You know where he went?" Jericho asked.
"No but he left in the direction of the bedroom I think. Why do you ask?" Stephanie said.
"Lets just say I have to fight for the woman I love." Jericho said, before cracking his knuckles and heading off. Stephanie watched Jericho step over the still fighting Stacy and Romeo to leave the room and then sighed.
"Well that confirms it then. I know Batista loves Trish and if hes fighting for the woman he loves then that means he still has the hots for that bimbo." Stephanie said lowly to herself before taking another spoon full of the delicious hearts, moons and clovers. Stephanie then cracked her own knuckles.
"Screw this! I'm not just gonna sit around here anymore! I'm gonna go find that bimbo Trish Stratus and fight for the man I love!" Stephanie yelled, of course the only ones who heard her was Stacy and Romeo who were to preoccupied to care. Stephanie rolled her eyes on the spectacle before her stepped over them much like Jericho did moments before and left the kitchen on her quest to find Trish Stratus and kick her ass. As she was leaving John Cena walked into the room. Once seeing Stacy and Romeo were having it out Cena decided to intervene and to what everyone seemed to be doing today and fighting for the one he loves. Cena split them up by grabbing Romeo by the shirt and pulling him up to his feet.
"Give me one reason why I shouldnt beat the crap outta you right now for hurtin' this fine young lady!" Cena said, his fist in the air ready to strike.
"Because it will hurt my pretty face!" Romeo said sheilding himself.
"Get the hell outta here!" Cena yelled turning Romeo around and litterly kicking his ass out of the kitchen. He then turned his attention to Stacy.
"You ok Stace?" Cena asked.
"Who me? Yeah that little jerk is nothing that I cant handle on my own. I am a vetern of the cat fight wars as you should know. Still thanks for the assist." Stacy said dusting herself off.
"Of course. Have a seat Stace lets talk." Cena said sitting down and then patting the seat next to him which Stacy sat on.
"About what John?" Stacy said perplexed. Granted it wasnt the first time she was perplexed but it was the first time since the cat fight incident only a few moments before.
"I wanna talk to you about Randy." Cena said.
"Why is here!?" Stacy asked, quickly fixing her hair.
"No hes not here Stace, listen that guy is no good for you. Hes a great big douchebag! He truly is the biggest jerk I have ever meet in my whole entire life. Did you know he crapped in a girls purse which made her quit?" Cena said telling her the facts.
"Really!? Who?' Stacy asked. Cena merely shrugged.
"I don't know, one of those Diva serch losers that, quite frankly, I'm glad quit cause damn those bitches were useless, all they were good for was walking around wearing berely there clothes and lookin' pretty, they didnt do anything productive in the WWE at all!" Cena said.
"You mean... like I do every week?" Stacy said, Cena did just explain her entire job in intriquite detail.
"What? Pfft! No way you do way more then that you... you... ummmm... Well hell its not important what you do! All that matters is that your not one of those dime a dozen bimbos that Vince brings into the WWE that if they disappeared off the show next week, everyone would forget." Cena said describing what would of surely happened to Stacy when she left for Dancing With the Stars if not for the weekly updates and what was almost certinally happen to her if she did indeed leave the WWE.
"I guess I would be pretty hard to replace wouldnt I?" Stacy said with a smile.
"For sure babe. So yeah anyways Orton, the dudes not good for you at all. Plus your not his type." Cena said. He decided this round of Orton bashing would surely prove that hes the better of the two.
"Im not?" Stacy said. After last night she had some suspicions, what with the gay sex and all but still she wanted to think that maybe, just maybe it was all a bad dream.
"No Stace your not, in fact, the guy isnt even into chicks, hes a great big flaming homosexual!" Cena said, once again Stacy thought that it might be true what with seeing it all with her own eyes and all.
"Well I don't want him to be gay! I have nothing against those people but I want Randy to be stright cause if hes gay then he wont want to be with me at all." Stacy said her logic brilliant as per usual.
"Stace thats what I'm trying to tell you, the guy is gay he perfers the company of other men... Not just to hang out with them I mean I most of my best friends are guys, I mean he perfers the company of them... up his ass." Cena said.
"Oh geez John gross!!! You could of just said in company of them in bed!" Stacy said in protest of Cena's graphic description.
"Maybe so but that obviously wouldnt of worked as well as my description. Now listen why don't you just forget about Orton and move on to someone a hell of a lot more deserving of you love then that asshole." Cena said.
"You know what John? Your right!" Stacy said, Cena almost lost his balance, his knees nearly buckling from under him from the utter shock that he actually was getting through to her.
"I AM!?!?" Cena said. Not his first choice of words but the shock of the moment was truly overwhelming for him.
"Yeah and you know what I'm going to do now?" Stacy said a determined look on her face.
"What?" Cena asked. He was genuinely curious about what she was going to do and was hoping that she would do her impression of an Alien face hugger on him.
"Im going to go confront that jerk Randy Orton, I'm gonna tell him off for stringing me along like he did and I might even kick him in his happy place for doing what he did to me and then I'm going to find someone in this house to love me. I mean there are two other guys in this house that I could love!" Stacy said with a smile.
"YEAH... wait two others!?! Who!?!" Cena said, could it be that he snatched her out of the arms of Orton and threw her right into the arms of another guy in this house.
"I Don't know... Chris or Dave I suppose." Stacy said with a shrug.
"CHRIS OR DAVE!?! What about me!?!" Cena said putting his name into the race for her affections yet again.
"Oh thats cute John but your more like a older brother. What with you looking out for me and the evils of bad boyfriends and all." Stacy said. She flashed John a smile and then marched away to confront Orton.
"SHIT!!!!! SHIT, SHIT, SHIT, SHIT, SHIT!!!!!!!!!" Cena yelled after Stacy was out of earshot. How the hell could one girl be so frecking dence was far beyond him. Still there was nothing he could do about it, he loved the bimbo. Or at least loved the idea of having sex with her at least one time just to say he did.
Meanwhile on his quest to find Batista to kick his ass Chris Jericho finds instead Trish Stratus.
"Oh hi Chris fancy meeting you here." Trish said with a warm smile. Her recent viewing of Jerichos downtown area gave her a new John Cena like infaction with Jericho.
"Where in one house we see each other all the time. There is nothing fancy about it whatsoever you cant turn a corner in this freckin house without finding someone... So why the hell cant I find that jerk Batista!?!'" Jericho yelled. The logic was sound the house was only so big, he has seen everone else on his quest to find Batista at least twice so where the hell was Batista.
"Batista? Oh I saw him in the laundry room earlier." Trish said.
"Laundry room! Of corse! I should of known thats where that fancy suit obsessed loser would be!" Jericho said walking off in that direction cracking his fists again. Trish quickly gave chase.
"Hey Chris I was thinking, maybe you know me and you... well we had a lot of tension from that whole me screwing you over, but not really screwing you thing? Well I think we should just break that tension and screw... you know once." Trish said.
"Screw you!" Jericho said still marching towards the laundry room.
"Yes! Exctally!" Trish said, excited that Jericho was on board with her plan. Jericho knowing where this was going though stopped dead in his tracks and turned to Trish.
"No Trish. I mean SCREW YOU, GO TO HELL, I DON'T EVER CARE TO SEE YOUR STUPID FACE AROUND HERE AGAIN!!! You had your chance to hop aboard Chris Jerichos shaggin waggon and you passed it up so GO SCREW YOURSELF!!!!!" Jericho yelled, then turned around and left on his way to the laundry room again leaving a shocked Trish right where she was. Meanwhile Stacy had finally caught up with a distrought Randy Orton sitting in the corner of the living room rocking back and forth, this back to the wall, no one would be sneaking up on him ever again.
"There you are!" Stacy yelled at Orton intent on letting him have it but good. Orton didnt even glace up at her.
"You know what buddy? You have used me for the very last time! I'm not just some stupid little play thing that whose feelings you can mess with whenever you want! I'm a person! A person with lavish long legs that are incredibly breath taking and and I'm not going to just throw myself at your whenever you say so just so when I turn my back to you you can go have gay sex with someone! I mean for God sakes Randy if you want to cheat on me there ARE other women in this house!" Stacy screamed, she was now red in the face and quite pleased with herself. Finally Orton looked up at her. He got up to his feet and took a deep breath.
"Stacy, Stacy, Stacy. Do you honestly think I give a crap about you now or at any point in my whole entire life?! Espically now! For the love of God I was just raped!!! That fruit Romeo just stole my ass flower and it REALLY hurts!!!! And another thing, how the hell can I cheat on you when we are not now nor have ever been dating! Serious Stacy me and you? I mean no offence but I pefer prettier girls... and boobs wouldnt hurt either! Now get the hell out of me, I got myself out of this house of losers and gay rapists but good!!!" Orton yelled then shoved Stacy out of his way and made his way over to the phone. Stacy being a typical woman instantly tuned Orton out as soon as she was finished with her own rant was happy that her mission was accomplished and walked out of the room overjoyed that she had toss Orton like a bad habbit not even knowing what he said but assuming it was something to the extint of not being able to go on living without her. With Stacy now out of the room, Orton was free to use the phone in peace and not have to worry about any distractions which was good since he was calling the shows producers.
"Yeah this is Randy Orton, I want out of this house and this stupid show! ...What do you mean "no"!? ...I Don't care about any stupid contracts! Do you know what happened to me!? I got raped!!! ...Well yeah maybe I would like it if I was raped by a woman but I was raped by ROMEO!!! ...Yeah thats right. ...What do you mean you still have no intentions of letting me out of this house!? I demand something be done about this I want out! ...NO I DON'T MEAN OUT OF THE CLOSET YOU ASSHOLE!!!! ...Comprimise? Well no one could ever accuse the ever honest Randy Orton about not being fair, whats the comprimise? ...You kick Romeo out instead of me for illeagl butt rape and throw him in prison while I stay in the house for the duration of the show far away from Romeo? YES!!!!! That would be awesome! You do that!" Orton squealed in joy hanging up the phone after reciting the entire dialouge of the person on the other end as if he was in a story and it was the only way the author could think of to let his audience know that the person on the other end of the phone was saying. Orton jumped up off the couch only to fall to his knees again afterwards due to forgetting about the incredible amount of pain that his butt was in from the raping. It was at this point that Romeo walked into the room to see Orton on his knees. Romeo couldnt help but smile at the sight of it.
"Well it looks like someone is ready for round eleven!" Romeo said continuing to smile as he walked ever closer to Orton. At this point all the ass pain in the would couldnt stop Orton from leaping over the couch like a champion leap-frogger to get as far away from Romeo as possible.
"YOU GET THE HELL AWAY FROM ME!!!" Orton yelled getting his butt back against the nearest wall as quick as he could. Romeo slighty bored with Orton now that he had already had his way with him simply rolled his eyes.
"Like you didnt like it." Romeo said quite sure of himself.
"Listen you Little Debbie Fruit Cup, I called the producers about you and they said that they are going to throw you out of this house and into prision for wrongful raping!" Orton yelled
"Wrongful raping is a oxymoron, all raping is wrong you idiot" Said John Cena as he walked through the room hearing only that part of the conversation.
"GO TO HELL CENA!!!!" Orton yelled but it was to late Cena had already finished walking through the room and was already gone.
"Wait a second here... are you saying that the shows producers are coming to throw me out of the house and into prision?" Romeo said seemingly excited.
"Yeah thats right! Your gonna get it now!" Orton yelled.
"Your darn tootin' I'm going to get it now! Prison is what I have been dreaming of ever since I was a small child!" Romeo said running to the bedroom, packing his belongings and running out the doors into the waiting producers arms before Orton could even get another sentence out. As soon as the door closed though Orton instantly transformed into a huge cocky prick, moreso then ever before.
"I DID IT!!!! I HAVE DEFEATED ROMEO!!! I AM UNBEATABLE!!!!" Orton screamed he jumped in the air in excitement only to grab his ass in pain.
"Oww... Ok... So no jumping yet..." Orton said to himself sitting back down on the couch again. Meanwhile Jericho had finally made it to the laundry room and busted in to see a content Batista ironing one of his fancy suits.
"Oh, hi Chris." The unsuspecting Batista said.
"Alright you big jerk lets go!!" Jericho yelled putting his fists up in fighting position.
"Go where?" Batista said still bewildered about the situation.
"Go fight! Right here! Right now! C'mon baby I'm gonna take you all the way down town to China town!" Jericho yelled.
"Wait you want to go right here but down to China town as well?" Batista said now completely confused.
"Oh stop playing stupid!" Jericho yelled throwing a random pair of socks next to him at Batista.
"Hey c'mon that was uncalled for." Batista said.
"You think that was uncalled for!?! What about you trying to get with my woman!" Jericho said now proclaiming Stephanie as his woman even though it wasnt quite true.
"Your woman!? Alright pal thats it no one calls my woman my woman whos not me!" Batista said, instantly thinking that Jericho still had a thing for Trish and momentarly confusing Jericho with his statement.
"Your... oh forget it! Lets just go!" Jericho said.
"Fine by me!" Batista said as both men colided in the middle of the room and started to fight.
"WAIT!!! WAIT!!!!" Jericho said, Batista himself kindly stopped.
"What?" Batista said wanting an explnation for the quick stop.
"We need to establish some rules here first. Just because were going to beat the holy living bageebers out of each other dosent mean that we cant do it like the couple of civilized gentlemen that we are." Jericho said, Batista nodded in agreement.
"Ok thats fair what rules?" Batista asked.
"Ok rule number one, no touching the face. Rule number two, no touching the hair. Rule three, no punching or kicking below the waist-"
"Whoa, whoa, whoa, Hold on I have a problem with that one." Batista said cutting of Jericho.
"What problem could you have with that!?" Jericho said in disbelief.
"Well I have no problem with no punching or kicking my small sensitive balls but what if I want to kick you in the legs?" Batista asked, Jericho nodded.
"Ok thats a fair complaint. Right then rule number three, no kicking or punching of the others boys, but the kicking or punching of legs or stomping of feet are allowed. Rule number four, no touching the face or hair! AND THATS IT!" Jericho screamed.
"Alright I can agree with that! Now lets get it on!" Batista said putting up his fists, Jericho put up his fists in similar fasion and both mean collided... Meanwhile elsewhere in the house Stephanie had finally found Trish walking down the hallway and in a completely non civilized way tackled her from behind to the ground.
"You bitch I'm gonna kill you!" Stephanie yelled. Trish not waiting for an explanation threw Stephanie off of her and viciously climbed on top of her scracthing at Stephanies face.
"Not if I kill you first you whore!" Trish yelled
TO BE CONTINUED...
Another chapther FINALLY finished. Once again I apologized about the wait but I can assure you it wont take so long for the next chapter to pop up. You may of noticed some things have changed... by which I mean Romeo will no longer in the story anymore. The reason for it being number one when was the last time anyone has ever seen him? He hasnt been around for a long ass time and second I thought that his part in the story really was finished, and it only helps the story more that hes gone now. Plus wait until you see how big of an asshole Orton is now that he has "won" the battle with Romeo. Good stuff. Anyways thats it for now please leave a review and tell me what you think and until next time see you later.
-Theodore
