VIII. In which Tauriel sleeps in her bed again
It was evening when she finally entered her bedroom and sat down at Kili's side.
He was still sleeping, his chest rose and fell with his breathing. Very gently she pulled his sticky hair out of his face and laid her hand on his forehead and cheek. His fever seemed to run lower. Her thumb stroke his dark brow, his cheekbone, her fingers touched his stubbly jaw. He stirred, and she withdraw her hand just as his eyes fluttered open. He blinked. Stared at her. Blinked again.
"Tauriel?"
"Yes."
His brows knitted together in confusion as he looked around.
"Where…? How…?"
His voice was still raspy and strained. He tried to sit up and groaned.
"Head aches. Badly. Throat hurts, too. What happened? Was I drunk?"
He shifted uncomfortably, obviously noticing his lack of trousers.
"Did we…? I don't remember anything."
She grinned. "You would if we had. Trust me."
"I bet." He returned her grin and blushed ever so lightly.
Damn. Why did he have to be so cute?
"What happened?" He finally succeeded in sitting up, leaning on his elbows.
"Your wound was infected. Fili and Bofur brought you here."
He frowned.
"Yeah. Right. I remember that now. Never been in so much pain before. I couldn't breathe. I was terrified." His hand took hers. "And then you were there. You have a habit of saving me."
He kissed her knuckles. And made a face. "My tongue feels like an old rug. Tastes same. I really need to brush my teeth."
He pushed back the blanket.
"No. You stay in bed. I can get you a toothbrush if you like."
"Nah. I have to pee like a horse. Help me get up."
She put his arm round her shoulder, and together they staggered to the bathroom. Kili waved her hands off as she tried to accompany him.
"I can manage. It is embarrassing enough as it is."
He succeeded to wash his face and brush his teeth and even managed to change into his clean shirt on his own, but leaned heavily on Tauriel and limped badly when she helped him back to bed. She removed the bandage, cleaned his wound, put some left over salve on it and dressed it again. He dozed off as soon as she had finished and slept soundly until the following morning.
When she checked on him at morning, the fever was down even more and his wound looked much better. The inflammation obviously abated. When Tauriel treated the wound with the antiseptic once more, Kili was only gritting his teeth now and clawing into the sheets instead of moaning with suppressed pain as he had still done the day before. After dressing the wound again, she made some light breakfast, and he fell asleep with his head nearly dropping into the bowl of cereals.
When she called on him again in the evening she found him sitting up and examining his i-phone with a worried look.
"What is it?"
"I've texted but Fili is not answering. Where did he go?"
"He didn't say. He was speaking with your uncle on the phone and mentioned a date?"
"Damn. I nearly forgot. They have an important appointment. I was supposed to go too. Only… I couldn't." He cursed. "That stupid orc. I hate to let Fili and uncle down. I would feel a lot better if I could be at their side right now. I feel as if I've slept for weeks now. What day is it anyway? Do you think that tomorrow I will be well enough to join them?"
"No. I don't. Especially not when you are about to engage in something dangerous. What are Fili and your uncle up to?"
"Oh. Nothing really. They are just going to fight the dragon."
"I can see that this is nothing to worry about. How on earth are they going to do that?"
"When Smaug invaded Erebor, she destroyed everything my family had built up. She sacked or bribed everybody who was working for us. She got rid of every evidence and installed her own men. But we still have allies. And there still are some members of the board loyal to Thorin. Over the years they've gathered a lot of information. Now we are well equipped enough to confront her and force her out of Erebor Industries so that Thorin can take over again."
"That is a dangerous quest."
"What would life be without a little bit of danger?" He winked.
"A lot healthier".
He put his hand on hers, his eyes suddenly serious. "Everything is well-prepared. Fili and I have been brought up and trained to this day. But I guess with that bloody leg it's just Fili now. But there is always Bilbo to aid him."
"Are your brother and your uncle really relying on that funny little man?"
He grinned.
"Do not underestimate Bilbo Baggins. You have no idea how often he appeared out of the blue and saved my uncle's neck. He may look like a grocer but whenever he files a lawsuit, it stings."
"Did he send you to me?"
"Huh?"
"Your brother and Bofur brought you to my flat the day before yesterday when you were sick. How did they know where I live if not for Baggins?" She frowned. "And thinking about it, I am sure I didn't give him my contact details. Where did he get my address from? It is classified."
Kili's cheeks coloured.
"That… um… I found out your address a while ago."
"How did you do that?"
He scratched his neck, avoiding her eye.
"I… hacked into the computer at the police-station."
"You did what?"
"Hacked the computer?"
"You retrieved my personal file?"
"I'm sorry. I just wanted to know where you live so I could come and meet you."
"You were stalking me."
"No!"
He tried to take her hand but she jerked away.
"Is that your idea of flirting? Tracking someone, invading their privacy? Are you one of those creeps who stare at women undress from behind bushes or text dirty messages?"
He rolled his eyes. "Oh, come on. You know I am not."
"How? How do I know?"
"You know me."
"I don't. All I know about you is that you have a criminal record. I know you own a gun, and I know your uncle is a dangerous man. You think that eases my mind?"
"He is not dangerous." He rolled his eyes again. "Well, yes, he is. But not like you think. Not like Thranduil wants you to believe. I have never met a person more honourable than my uncle."
"That doesn't speak for the company you're keeping."
"Funny."
He tried to take her hand again. She jerked away again.
"Tauriel. Please. It was stupid to hack into the computer. I should not have done it. But I desperately wanted to get to know you."
"And by reading my personal file you think you do?"
"I didn't read it. I just got your address. I didn't look up anything else, although your firewall is a joke. Your database welcomes exploit, it is somewhat of a self-service, really. I needed less than five minutes with my i-phone when they handed over our things. I could have got everything out of your computers. I could have deleted all our records. But I didn't do it. All I wanted was your address to get a chance to ask you out on a date."
"You didn't have to hack my private address. You could have come to the police station and ask me out."
"And embarrass you in front of all your colleagues? You would have turned me down cold. In fact, you already had. I asked you out numerous times. I figured if I managed to meet you near your home as if by coincidence I would stand more of a chance. When none of your colleagues would keep you from saying yes. Especially that pretty blond not-your-brother who watches over you like a harpy."
"You still hacked a police computer."
"And I apologise from all my heart. It was stupid and childish and totally overstepping boundaries and makes me look like a love-stricken geek. Which I am."
He tried his sweet irresistible smile but lost it when Tauriel frowned at him. After a moment's silence he spoke up again, serious this time.
"What is it you are guarding? What would I have found out if I had read your file? How you ended up with Thranduil? You told me your parents died when you were a child, is that it? What happened?"
"I… My parents…"
She fell silent. And changed the subject.
"Is that what you do? Hacking other people's computers?"
"You make it sound so bad. I am not harming anybody."
"Computer crime is a serious offence."
He sighed.
"I have heard that line before. But what I do is different."
"Steal from the rich, give to the poor?" She harrumphed.
"Nah. I like to mess with the bad guys. Make the world a little less ugly. Remember when Sauron turned the Sea of Rhûn into a wildlife area? That was me." He smiled. "Although I sometimes do steal from the rich and give to the poor. The poor being my family and their friends mostly."
"I could arrest you for that."
"Yes, you could. But I don't think you will."
She arched an eyebrow. "Why not?"
"Because you dedicated your life not to law but to justice. Which in some cases is not the same." He paused. "And because you like me."
"Yes", Tauriel said. "And yes."
This time she allowed him to take her hand. They sat in silence for a while, Kili's fingertips stroked her palm ever so delicately. She knew his gaze was upon her but she didn't look up. He was pursuing her with might and she couldn't fathom what she was feeling. Did it unsettle her? Yes. Was she angry with him? Yes. Was she flattered? Dammit, yes. She even was impressed with that Sea-of-Rhûn-thing. It had been quite the sensation when Mordor Inc. had turned the beautiful lake into an ecological reserve all of a sudden when they had already started to plant oil-well derricks and had never before given a damn about the endangered species they were killing.
But what really unsettled her was what he had said earlier. That she knew him. And although it couldn't be; although they had met only briefly, that was exactly how she felt. As if she knew him. It wasn't strange at all to have him around, to sit at his side, to have him sleep in her bed. As if he belonged with her.
She pushed that disturbing thought out of her mind and was glad when his stomach growled and allowed her to change topic.
"Are you hungry?"
"Could eat a bear."
"I am afraid bear is not on the menu. But I can order a pizza at Beorn's?"
"Great. I pay. I promised to buy you dinner, didn't I?"
They had the pizza on the couch, and some Blue Mountain Draft, although Tauriel wasn't sure whether it would agree with the drugs Kili was still taking to keep his fever in check. He suggested to quit the medicine, and ducked his head when she glowered at him. They argued over anchovies and the right choice of movie before they finally settled for some black-and-white classic of which Kili could – and would – recite each dialogue in a low whisper until she switched off the TV.
"Hey! Why did you do that?"
"You know that movie by heart."
"It's one of my favourites. The story of Beren and Luthien is beautiful. Sad, yes. But beautiful."
She sneered. "Love conquers all. Do you really think life is that simple?"
"I know life can be an asshole. That's why I like movies like that. Who knows? Maybe there is even some truth in it. I like to think so anyway."
"You are a romantic."
"Guilty."
"Well, I'm not. The love of a lifetime? That was invented by the Valentin's Day industry. I don't know anyone who has ever experienced it."
"I do. My mother. She loved my father more than anything. More than Fili, more than me. And she loves us fiercely. But every time I look at her something is missing. She is not whole. She will never be again."
"Doesn't make the idea of the one, big love sound too appealing, does it?"
He shrugged. "You never know. You can be in love for the rest of your life, or it can all end in tears. Guess it's the risk you have to take. I don't think mum ever regretted falling in love with my father."
"Your father died in a car-crash?"
He nodded. "Someone tempered with the brakes of uncle Frerin's Ford Mustang."
"My parents were murdered too." She said quietly. "Some orcs killed them in a raid. I was but a little girl then. I didn't have any relatives. My mother and Thranduil's late wife had been close friends. He took me in and raised me as his daughter."
"You remember them? Miss them?"
"Yes, I do."
"Must be hard."
"Yes. And no." She smiled. "Sometimes I have nightmares. I dream of the day they were killed. But mostly it is nice to remember them. How my mother would brush my hair and my father would sing to me."
"Sounds nice. All I know of my father are photographs, and stories, and the gap he left behind. How much everybody misses him."
"I am very sorry.
"Don't be. I never knew him. There was always Fili who cared for me. And mum and Thorin. My uncle did his best to be like a father to us." He smiled and looked at her. "I think he will like you."
"I am the police Captain who arrested him. And I am Thranduil's step-daughter."
"You are right. He will have my head. On a spike and with pickles."
She laughed, and it turned into a yawn.
"You are tired. You should go to sleep."
"Yes, I really should. But you need to get off the couch first."
"Oh no, you are not sleeping on that thing again. You sleep in your own bed. I can roll up here."
"You are still recovering. You belong in a decent bed."
"Agreed. It is a big bed. I think we will both fit in."
"The two of us in one bed?"
"I wouldn't try anything on a sleeping beauty even if I could. Which I can't. My leg is hurting like hell, my head is aching and I am dead tired. You are safe with me." He smiled reassuringly, rose with some difficulty and held out his hand. "Let's bond some more and brush our teeth together, shall we? To be honest, I need your help to get to the bathroom."
When Tauriel eventually settled under the blanket, dressed in sweatpants and a tee, she quickly murmured a good-night and turned her back on him. Her heart was beating absurdly quick. Christ. She was making a fuzz like some old spinster. She buried her face deep into the pillow and forced herself to breathe deep and steady. And then she felt his lips brush her hair and heard his soft voice in her ear.
"Thank you for telling me. Have a good night."
She drifted off to sleep as soon as her fingers had found his.
