Disclaimer: I do not own dgrayman.

Road smiled at the recent memories. Who knew that the exorcist she kidnapped would be so mentally unstable. She could see that he had abandonment issues. Linking back all the way to parents he didn't even know. And to when he was abused by everyone who called him a demon. Then to him killing his father who seemed slightly familiar but she just shook her head and continued browsing. Next came the abusive master who kept abandoning him with debts. Probably not the best thing to do to a child that needed a father figure.

The next memories were slightly happier. It included him arriving at the Order and making friends and meeting a certain samurai. But while they seemed happy, Road could see that he was just simply learning to mask how he felt better. Sure he had a terrific poker face before but he was not watched constantly by Cross. At the Order he was observed through out the day. Road chuckled at the fact that it couldn't have been healthy for the young teen to bottle up his emotions every day.

This was where the samurai came into play. Their arguements seemed to be the one thing he looked forward to in the day other than eating. It seemed like he was able to release steam when they fought. Then when he confessed to him it simply added another way for them to release steam.

To Road it seemed rather obvious that almost all of his friends had been in love with him at some point. When he first showed up it was Lenalee. And then it was Kanda who recently started becoming more distant. And just as Kanda became more distant Lavi became interested. Road was almosted tempted to get some popcorn and a drink before she continued because all of this information was proving to be most interesting. It was almost like someone created the teen to be loved by all but have his entire life be a sob story.

Which brought her to his most recent memory that occurred before she kidnapped him. The betrayal of the one he loved. She was having a hard time deciding which memory she wanted him to relive over and over again. There were so many to chose from. So she finally decided she would just mesh all the bad memories together with her own added twist. Afterall she didn't want him to remember all the semi-good things that had happened to him. And so with that she started.

Allen's pov

Where am I? Last I remember I was in that room with the crazy kidnapper girl. She stabbed me with the candles she brought and I passed out. And now I am here. Am I dead finally. He looked around at the dark room. It was unusually hot in the room and he could hear people moving around him. He reached to grab someone when it all turned bright.

He squinted as the light entered his eyes so he did not notice all the familiar faces surrounding him. But when he did he recognized where he was right away. It was back when he was little and someone had noticed his arm. He had been carted to the nearest church where they tried to exorcise the 'demon' from his arm. And when that didn't work they called him Satan's son and tried to burn him at a stake.

He was slowly trying to wrap his head around the fact he was on the past when he noticed a difference. Instead of the church leaders he was surrounded by his friends from the Order. They all had cruel smiles on their faces as they came closed and closer. And when he looked at the head leader he saw Mana urging everyone on.

What is going on? Why are they trying to hurt me? I thought we were friends. Mana! Please help me! I need you! Please Mana! I'm sorry I killed you! I didn't mean to, I tried to stop. Please! Please! But he could only uselessly flap his mouth open and shut since the words were not coming out.

The scenery changed into him laying in a coffin. He sat up to see that everyone was still there. They were talking about him. He could only watch as everyone took some time to say a few words.

"Hello everyone. Unfortunately, we were this monster's parents until we abandoned him on the streets. Glad to see that he is finally dead." Said the two people who vaguely resembled him.

Next was Mana. "Well I adopted that freak of nature out of pity. When I died and was able to get away from him, he brought me back to life only to try and kill me. Luckily he didn't and I got in a scar on his eye." He sat back down to let the next person come up.

"Hi, I'm Jerry. I am the cook at the Order. Man you should have seen him eat. I always had to work hard to make sure the food was in front of him before he tried to eat me. Everyday I put as much poison as I could to try and kill him. But the monster refused to die. I'm just glad he is finally gone." He slowly walked off the stage. More people he met came up. Even if is was just for an instant. Until it reached the last three people.

"Hey, I'm Lavi if you didn't know already. This pathetic excuse for a human being seemed to believe he was my friend. Like that could ever happen. I am a bookman, I don't have many friends and it certainly wouldn't have been him. So I welcome the last two people who saw him alive." He skipped off into the crowed while two people with long, dark hair came to the stage.

"I'm just glad that thing is dead. He thought he had my boyfriend in love with him. Gosh he is such a loser. Like that could ever happen. I must say it was a pleasure to see him slit his wrists when he realized that me and Kanda were actually together. He finally realized in his last moments that no one ever loved him." She started laughing before trying to tug Kanda off the stage. He stopped right in front of the casket where Allen sat crying. He leaned closer as if he could really see him alive and alert.

"I hate you." He said in a strong voice before finally following Lenalee out of the room.

Allen hunched over his knees that he had pulled up to his chest. He sobbed as he heard everyone laughing and talking about an afterparty. And he stayed there contemplating what memories were true and what was false when Road came to get him.

Lenalee's pov

Damn it! Why Allen? Kanda hasn't stopped looking for him since he left. Why can't he just acknowledge the fact that he is gone? Soon he is going to remember that he can report this to Komui. I can't let that happen.

She looked up at the dark mansion they were passing at the moment. She almost that she could hear Allen screaming.

No, I couldn't be that lucky.

A/N: Hello everyone. A nice long chapter for you all. I just love you all so much that I had to keep writing. I find it funny that throughout this chapter I was listening to Safe and Sound by Taylor Swift. I am one seriously messed up person. Why do I feel the need to torture Allen I don't know. Hope you like the chapter though. It should get better for him. I would like your thoughts on what you would like next. I will try and incorporate all of your ideas. Somehow. Bye until next time which could be tomorrow if I get enough reviews. Well I don't want to force you to review but if you could it would be awesome. Bye and review please.