Castiel slept until late afternoon. Dean checked on him periodically. He looked different wearing regular clothes and Dean couldn't help but watch him sleep again for a few minutes. After a few trips up and down the stairs, Dean finally decided to grab some books and do his research in the panic room. It was just easier to keep an eye on him that way and it seemed a lot less obvious than going back and forth.
Sam was steady-going through information on the computer and pulling books out of Bobby's vast library. He was making notes and trying to make connections but was still coming up empty. They let Bobby sleep for 6 hours and that really ticked him off.
"When I say 3 hours that is what I mean, 3 hours. Bunch of idjits." Bobby kept mumbling to himself throughout the afternoon.
Sam stared at his computer for a moment. He let out a sigh of frustration and leaned back in his chair. "Bobby? Maybe we are looking at this wrong."
"How do you mean Sam?"
"Maybe he didn't take Castiel's powers. Maybe, he just bound them. Remember Cas said he heard the phrase "bound within these walls"? Maybe he just bound his powers."
Bobby considered the idea. "So, you're saying that he still has them but they are on a kind of lock down inside his human form?"
"Yeah, something like that. Sound too farfetched?"
Bobby thought a minute. "Not really Sam. So, if that is right, we should be looking at reversal spells or spells that release powers? But, why bind his powers. Why not just kill him and finish it?"
"That's just it Bobby. Why? He could have killed Cas, you and Jules but he didn't. I'm guessing it's because he didn't want to. Cas is his brother. I think he just wanted Cas to see things his way."
"Sam, he left him on the floor, bleeding and no way to heal himself. He doesn't seem like a caring brother to me. Maybe it is just what he said. Raphael didn't want to make Cas a hero with his death. Sometimes a spade is just a spade. Either way, I think you are on to something. Let's start looking for binding spells."
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Dean took a break from the books when he saw Castiel starting to stir. He walked over and sat down by the bed. Cas' eyes opened and he saw Dean looking down on him.
"Are you watching me sleep again Dean?" He smirked at him.
"No." Dean responded sounding much like a lie.
"See, now you understand why I do it. You just can't help it." Cas smiled.
"How are you feeling Cas?" Dean changed the subject.
"Like an archangel is standing on my chest." Cas tried to change positions and was rewarded with stabs of pain.
Dean partly smiled. "Yeah, well, he kind of is."
Dean unbuttoned Cas' shirt and pulled off the bandage on his chest. Cas lay there quietly and watched as Dean cleaned around the stitches and put on a fresh bandage.
"So, Cas, this is new territory for us. If you have any questions or anything…" Dean hesitated.
"You mean, about being human? No, I've been watching you long enough to know what to do." Cas spoke confidently.
"Oh, that isn't creepy at all." Dean handed him some antibiotic pills.
"Here, Bobby said he wants you to take these."
Cas looked at the pills in his hand suspiciously. "How were these obtained?"
"Don't ask." Dean poured out a cup of water and helped Cas sit up just enough to take the pills.
Cas was exhausted. His chest hurt and was pounding with pain. He felt worried about involving Dean, Sam and Bobby in his fight against an archangel. He felt concerned for Julianna and what she might be going through. He felt angry over the situation.
He felt.
It was so new to him, these feelings. They all seemed to be rushing at him at once. It was difficult to stay focused.
Then, there were the physical aspects. He needed to shower, brush his teeth, and change his clothes. So much to think about that he never had to consider before.
Cas took a deep breath and tried to relax.
"Dean, has Sam come up with anything?" He put his head back on the pillow. He still felt so tired.
"Not yet Cas but he will. You know Sammy. He is in nerd heaven with all the research he is doing."
Cas looked at Dean for a minute, thinking. "Why do you tease your brother like you do?"
"Duh Cas, because he is my little brother. That's my job."
"You tease me a lot as well. Is that also your job?"
"Well, now that you are temporarily human, you are kind of like a little brother too. So, suck it up."
"Dean, if anything, I would be your older brother. You would have to come to me for advice and permission to do things."
Dean laughed. "Nah, I don't get that vibe from you Cas. You are little brother material. And for the record, I never ask permission to do anything."
"Oh, you would ask me for permission. If I was your big brother, I would see to it that you followed my rules." Cas spoke confidently.
"Except, I wouldn't listen because you wouldn't be my big brother. You would be my little brother." Dean taunted him.
Cas thought about that and didn't particularly like it. "So, you are saying that I am not a good big brother?"
"No, I didn't say that. I'm just saying that I see you as a little brother."
"No, you don't."
Dean rolled his eyes at him. "Um yeah, kind of sure that I do Cas."
Cas thought about it again. "No, you don't. You see, because when you need help, you call me. When you aren't sure how to proceed on a hunt, you call and ask for my advice. When you worry for Sam, you call and ask me to help you watch out for him. When you need something, you ask me to get it for you. That is big brother material, as you say."
It was Dean's turn to think about it. "Well, that is when you have all your big, bad, angel mojo going on." Dean regretted the comment the second it came out of his mouth. Castiel's reaction confirmed it.
"Ah, I see, we are back to the, "baby in a trench coat" comment." Cas looked away, annoyed.
"What? Oh man Cas, you still think of that one comment I made? Did I hurt your feelings?"
"I don't know why we are talking about this. I don't feel well. I want to go to sleep again." Cas turned his head and closed his eyes, shutting out the light and Dean.
Dean sat there for a minute trying to figure out what had just happened.
"Cas? Seriously? You are going to get all moody with me? This whole situation is unreal."
Cas didn't respond.
"Do you want more pain medication?"
"Did I ask for it?"
"No."
"Duh Dean, then I guess I don't want it."
Cas imitated Dean's earlier comment and his voice and wording took on the tone of an angry human.
"Fine. I will be upstairs if you need me."
Dean rolled his eyes at him, stood up and went upstairs, leaving Cas to navigate through the rush of human emotions.
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Cas slept the rest of the day and into the night. Dean slept on the cot near him again, just in case he needed anything. He did ask for pain medication once during the night.
When Dean handed him the pill, Cas grabbed his arm.
"Dean?"
"Yeah Cas?"
"Do you think I'm weak?"
"Weak? No Cas, I don't think you're weak. Why would you ask that?"
Cas didn't answer. He took the pill and settled back to sleep. Dean's opinion of him meant everything. He couldn't tell Dean that. He didn't know how.
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The next morning, Dean went upstairs as Cas was still sleeping. He stepped outside into the cool air and stretched. He didn't see Sam sitting out there.
"How is Cas?"
Dean jumped at the sound of his voice. "Dammit Sam. I didn't see you there."
"I know. Is playing nurse maid messing with your hunter instincts?" Sam laughed at him.
"Well, someone has to take care of him and you and Bobby abandoned the job. You know, you are Mr. care bear, why aren't you taking care of Cas?"
"Cause, he is your angel Dean."
Dean's voice got louder "He is not my angel."
Sam changed the subject, seeing his brother's discomfort. "How is he doing?"
"I don't know Sam. He is starting to act like a human, even his voice is sounding different. He is all emotional and crap. It's going to take some getting used to. Pinocchio is learning to be a real boy."
"Dean?"
Dean sat down next to Sam. "Yeah?"
"When I was fixing up Cas, what were you whispering to him that made him calm down?"
"Um, I don't know. I don't remember. I was just trying to keep him focused on me and not what you were doing." Dean lied.
Sam nodded, knowing that Dean was lying.
"So, why are you lying to me about it?"
Dean rolled his eyes. "It was nothing Sammy. I just told him what I thought he needed to hear to stay strong until you were finished."
"Like?"
"Geesh, you gonna let this go?"
"No." Sam wanted an answer. He wanted more insight into the relationship between his brother and his angel.
Dean sighed at him, frustrated because he knew Sam wasn't going to give up until he got an answer.
"I just told him that he had to stay tough. I told him that he was part of this family and we needed him and Jules needed him. Just junk like that. Are you happy?"
Sam nodded and then started smiling.
Dean saw the smile break out on his face. "What are you smiling about?"
"Cas is kind of like a brother to us huh? I wonder how things will be if we can't change him back."
"I don't know Sam but if he were a brother, would you think of him as an older brother or a younger brother?"
"What? Why?"
"Just humor me."
"Older definitely." Sam shook his head, agreeing with his own evaluation of it.
Dean just sat there and thought about it again.
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Later that afternoon, Dean walked into the panic room to find Castiel awake and laying quietly in the bed.
"Well, look who is finally awake."
"I feel stronger Dean. I think I am getting better." Cas seemed to be over his anger. He looked under his blankets. "Did you change my pants, or did I? I can't remember."
"Does it matter?" Dean did not want to dwell on it. "Let me check your bandages."
Dean unbuttoned Cas' shirt part of the way and saw only a small amount of blood through the bandage. That was a good sign. He gently lifted the bandage off of Cas and threw it away.
"Dean, I can clean this myself now. You don't have to." Cas said feeling confident that he was healing.
Dean sat down with the fresh bandages and laid them out on the blanket as he did the other 10 times he had done this. He started to clean around the wound. When Cas tried to do it, Dean smacked his hand.
"I can do it Dean." Cas said impatiently.
"I heard you" Dean replied but he continued to clean around the stitches.
"Stop babying me Dean. I can do it myself."
"Yeah, ok Cas." Dean replied again. Yet, he didn't stop what he was doing. He started to put on the new bandages and Cas gave in, sat back and let him. Dean knew Cas was trying to be more independent but he didn't care. He wanted to do it and that was that. He wasn't even sure why. He just didn't mind caring for the angel.
Cas watched him quietly. He was enjoying the nurturing attention he was getting from Dean but he knew he could never let him know that.
"There, all done."
"Thank you," Cas said with an annoyed tone to his voice.
"You know what Cas. You are a grumpy and moody human." Dean stated as he put the left over bandages back in their place.
"I am not. I'm just…well…I'm hungry." Cas said in his defense.
"You are hungry?!" Sam was standing in the doorway. "Wow Cas, never expected to hear that from you."
"Well, I am. And, I want to get out of this room." Cas demanded.
Dean and Sam looked at each other. "He is a bossy little human too, isn't he Sammy?" Dean smirked.
"Yeah. He must be feeling better."
"Stop calling me human!" Cas was getting more annoyed at his situation by the minute.
Cas' attitude amused Dean. He knew that Cas couldn't get upstairs without help and Cas knew it too. Dean directed his conversation to Sam.
"I don't know Sam. It has only been two days. Healing takes time and patience. I don't think he is ready. And, this attitude of his, well that is just no way to behave."
Sam grinned, understanding what Dean was doing. "I agree Dean. I don't think he is ready."
Seeing that he was getting nowhere, Cas took a deep breath and tried to ask again nicely.
"Please Dean? Can I please go upstairs and eat something?"
Dean and Sam laughed at his attempt. Sam wondered when Castiel was going to finally realize that Dean was in charge.
"Now Cas that sounded so sweet. I can't resist." Dean gave him a sarcastic smile. He walked over and helped him to sit up. He waited a few minutes for him to get used to the position.
"Are you ok?"
"Yes, I'm good Dean. I want to try to stand up on my own."
Dean sighed at his stubborn friend. "Ok, I am staying right here though. The last thing I need is you falling."
"Ok" Cas pulled his legs off the bed and slowly worked to a standing position. He started to sway and grabbed on to Dean to steady himself. Dean and Sam said nothing and let him attempt to walk.
Cas didn't find walking difficult. It was the pain and heaviness in his chest that made it difficult for him to exert himself. He moved slowly but made it to the stairs. Sam walked up the stairs in front of him and Dean walked behind him. He made it up the stairs easily.
"Well, look here. It's the walking dead." Bobby stated sarcastically as Cas walked into the kitchen.
"As you can see, I am not dead Bobby. However, I am hungry." Cas said feeling an emptiness in his stomach. He smelled something coming from the stove and it smelled wonderful to him. It caused his stomach to make a grumbling sound.
"Bobby, what are you cooking?" Cas inquired as he sat at the table and rested.
"I'm cooking cheeseburgers for your friend over there." Bobby said, gesturing to Dean.
"Can I have one?" Cas asked politely.
"No." Dean responded automatically.
"Why Dean? There is enough for all of us."
"You are still recovering. The first thing you eat shouldn't be a greasy burger. Sam, tell him please? He doesn't listen to me. He reminds me of you when you entered your teen years. It was pure hell." Dean was realizing that a human Cas was going to be a handful.
"He's right Cas. You should have some soup." Sam offered.
"I don't want soup." Cas mumbled to himself but didn't argue further.
Bobby started laughing at him.
"What is so funny Bobby?" Dean asked.
"Nothing. He just sounded like a little kid. I bet Julianna would enjoy 'human Cas'."
Castiel rolled his eyes. He had his fill of being called human.
Bobby pulled a can of soup from the cabinet. "Ok, one can of soup going in the microwave. Hope you like chicken and vegetables Cas."
"I'm not hungry anymore." Cas felt a little sick to his stomach all of a sudden.
"I don't want to hear it Cas. You are eating." Dean pointed his finger at him for emphasis and got crackers out of the cabinet.
Everyone was fairly quiet during lunch. Cas enjoyed the new sensation of eating food. He liked the taste of the soup and the heat as it went down his throat. But, it didn't smell nearly as enticing as the cheeseburger did. He eyed Dean's cheeseburger and waited patiently. When Dean got up to get himself another beer, Cas reached over and took a big bite out of his cheeseburger. He rolled his eyes up to heaven as if it was the best thing he had ever tasted. He chewed it up quickly as Dean approached.
Bobby and Sam saw it but said nothing. They both tried desperately not to laugh. Cas was kind of funny as a human. When Dean sat down, Cas looked the other way nonchalantly. Dean looked at his burger and looked up suspiciously at the rest of them. He thought that he hadn't really eaten that much of it. After a moment, he let it go. He figured that he must have eaten it without realizing it, and he continued on with no comment.
Sam smiled at the mischievous face on Castiel and started laughing.
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