I fell asleep in the truck before we ever even reached the pharmacy. I figured Darry would want to lecture me and continue the conversation we were having in the waiting room, but he must have realized I was practically running on fumes at that point because he directed me to take a nap and left me alone. I was eternally grateful, because my nap may have been short, but it was also the best part of my fucked up day.
I didn't wake up until Darry opened my door that I was leaning on, causing me to almost topple out of the car with a very embarrassing squeal. Darry caught me before I could fall, though, gently placing me back into the truck so I could wake up some. "You okay?" He asked gently, resting a hand on my shoulder.
Yawning, I nodded. I felt incredibly groggy and I was still sleepy as hell, but I was okay. I wiped some of the sleep out of my eyes before I took Darry's offered hand and hopped out of the truck. He kept his hand on my back as we walked up the porch.
"Go on to your room," Darry directed gently as he unlocked the door and pushed it open, "I'm gonna take a shower and then I'll be in there to deal with you."
I groaned as I walked through the door he was holding open. I really didn't want to be dealt with, but I was too tired to argue about it, so I grumbled a complaint before I headed towards my room, moping.
Darry chuckled from behind me, closing the door. "Go back to sleep!" He called after me once I'd disappeared into my bedroom.
"Don't have to tell me twice," I muttered even though Darry couldn't hear me anymore. I flopped down onto my bed with a sigh, pressing my cheek against my pillow. Part of me hoped that somebody, anybody, would show up before Darry got out of the shower so he couldn't spank me, but it was barely two o'clock, and Sodapop and Steve didn't get off until 4:30. Darry had plenty of time to light my ass up before anybody showed up, and there wasn't much I could do to get out of it. Jesus, why did I have to go and get into a fight?
I sighed, squeezing my eyes shut and trying not to think about my impending doom. If he used that damn strap, I was sure I'd die. What I did was bad, sure, but it wasn't that bad! I figured his belt would come off, at least, though. He was overreacting if you ask me, but I sure as hell wasn't going to say that to his face. That would just get me into more trouble.
Keeping my eyes closed and trying to sleep wasn't getting me anywhere, despite the fact that I was absolutely exhausted. I was way too nervous to sleep. It didn't help that I was starting to get hungry, either.
I ended up lying on my back and staring at the ceiling while I waited to hear the shower shut off. Hopefully, Darry would remember that I was sensitive and did not need a whoopin'. It wouldn't be the first time I'd pulled some pity out of him and got myself out of trouble, it definitely wouldn't be the last. Really, all I needed to do was make myself look and sound pitiful enough for him to get all big brother-ish like he tends to.
Of course, Darry doesn't like it when I'm manipulative like that, but it wasn't like I'd have to do much faking to look like a kicked puppy. I was beyond exhausted and I'm sure it was clear by my face, and my bottom lip was jutted out the way it always is when I'm in trouble. Really, all I needed was some tears to really finish the look, but it never takes those long to come during a 'talk' with Darry.
I groaned quietly when I heard the water from the shower cut off abruptly. Part of me wanted to act like I was asleep, but Darry would probably just wake me up anyway. Even if he didn't, it would just be prolonging the inevitable. I just hoped to God he'd let me take a nap when he was done with me. At that point, I felt like I could fall asleep during my spanking.
I stared up at the ceiling for awhile longer while I waited for Darry, and it felt like I was yawning every ten seconds. I hate that my body kicks my ass so hard for not getting any sleep but then keeps me up (or wakes me up, more often than not) when I try to sleep. It's not fair, and I really wished that Darry would realize he doesn't always have to get so spank-happy when I get a little bitchy because it's not my fault I'm so tired and the wise part of me starts to malfunction. Lord knows that if I could actually sleep and be in a better mood all day then I would, but I can never get any decent sleep and unfortunately, it's a well-known fact that I'm not such a joy to be around when I'm tired.
"Pony," Darry said my name and pulled me out my head, popping his head in the room, "I figured you'd be asleep."
I shrugged, pushing myself up into a sitting position as I watched my big brother walk into the room. He was out of his work clothes and now in a tight t-shirt and a pair of blue jeans. His hair was damp and sticking to his forehead.
"I couldn't sleep," I grumbled, scrubbing at my eyes with the back of my hand, "Just gonna take a nap later."
"We'll see," Darry said, taking a seat on the bed so he was right in front of me, "We don't need you messin' up your sleep schedule any more than it already is."
"Who cares," I muttered, leaning back against the headboard and crossing my arms over my chest, "It's not like I sleep anyway."
I'd officially started pouting by then, and I was glaring at the floor beside Darry's feet. I was definitely aiming for Darry's soft spot by then, but I was also very frustrated with my own mind. I wanted to sleep, goddamnit, and I didn't want to have to take pills to do it, either.
Darry sighed, resting his hand on my leg, "I know you're tired, Ponyboy. I know it's why you've been acting up, but you know we're gonna figure it out."
He'd barely said anything and I was already trying not to cry. I cursed my stupid, sleep deprived brain for making me such a baby.
"You can sleep here in a little bit," Darry relented after a minute of studying my face, patting my leg a little bit, "But we've got some stuff to talk about."
I gave Darry my puppy dog eyes, a pout prominent on my face. It was quite evident that I wanted nothing to do with whatever he wanted to talk about.
"That look don't work on me, Ponyboy," Darry lied, rolling his eyes. We both know that it does work on him, he's just gotten better at ignoring it,"You started a fight today, Ponyboy! You know better!"
"I didn't start it," I disagreed quietly, picking at my comforter. I didn't want to look at Darry.
"You did, too," Darry countered, "Just because you didn't hit him first does not mean that you didn't start it, so I don't want to hear all that."
I figured that's what he'd say, which is why I didn't put up too much of a fight. At least I can say I tried, though.
"And you say it was your idea?" Darry asked skeptically, giving me a look that said I should definitely tell the truth if I knew what was good for me.
I sighed quietly and shrugged, pulling my knees up to my chest. I knew I was gonna have to admit that Curly may or may not have been the reason I even got into the fight. I also knew that Darry wasn't gonna let me hang out with him all summer, and that made me want to cry even more.
"You don't know?" Darry inquired, crossing his arms back over his chest. "How can you not know if it was your idea?"
My eyes watered. He was being harsh and my brain was too sleep deprived to handle that.
"It was my idea," I muttered, "Kinda."
"Kind of?" Darry asked again, not lightening up any. "It's a yes or no question, Ponyboy. Pick one, and you better not lie to me."
I sighed into my knees, pulling them tighter to my chest. My vision blurred after a second and a fat tear rolled down my cheek. "I dunno," I whimpered, still not wanting to give him an answer. Lying wasn't a very good idea, but if I told the truth, then Darry wasn't gonna let me see Curly anymore and he'd whoop me for lying to him. Either way, the outcome wasn't looking good in my favor. It was a lot easier to just curl in on myself and cry than it was to actually talk to Darry.
He must have realized his original approach wasn't going to get him anywhere because he took a deep breath and uncrossed his arms. I buried my head into my knees, hoping maybe he'd realize that I was too tired to get punished and let me take a nap. Of course, he didn't, but instead scooted a little closer to me, grabbing both of my ankles and pulling. My legs were back out in front of me, despite the fact that I tried to keep them up against my chest. Darry's a lot stronger than me, unfortunately.
He grabbed both of my hands before I could use them to cover up my face instead and pulled me closer to him. I tried to pull my hands away from him, but he just tightened his grip.
"Quit that," he ordered quietly, "I understand that you're tired and upset, but you don't get to just shut down when I'm talkin' to you. You understand?"
His voice was gentle but he was still in discipline mode. Sniffling, I made another futile attempt at pulling my hands out of his grip, but he leveled me with a warning glare so I just sighed and nodded.
"I understand," I mumbled tearfully, staring down at the comforter instead of up at him.
"Now," he started after a moment of silence, releasing one of my hands and keeping the other in his, "Why'd you lie to me about Curly having nothing to do with the fight?"
My eyes shot up from the comforter. I stared at him in disbelief, furrowing my eyebrows. He knew?!
He waved off my confusion with an eye roll. "Oh, I'm not stupid, Ponyboy. You ain't confrontational. You wouldn't have started an argument with some Soc, no matter what he was sayin' about you. Not on your own, at least."
I whined a little because he should have just fucking told me he knew instead of putting me through all of that. I know he wasn't intentionally being a jerk; It's always a big deal to him to actually hear things come out of my mouth, even if he knows, but it still sucked.
Sniffling, I tried to pull my knees back up against me so I could bury my face in them, but Darry grabbed my ankles to stop me again.
"Stop, Ponyboy," he ordered again, swatting my leg, "I don't care about seein' you cry. What I do care about is not staring at the top of your head while I'm trying to talk to you."
Darry didn't seem to realize that I cared about him seeing me cry. He already spanks me on my bare ass and lets me cry into his chest every night after I have a nightmare, does he really need to watch me cry while he scolds me, too?
Darry sighed after I didn't respond, taking one of my hands again, "Why did you lie about it, Ponyboy?"
No matter how many times he got sidetracked, I was going to have to talk. As much as I didn't want to, I knew I would have to do it sooner or later either way. I figured it would be easier on the both of us if I didn't stall. Besides, the quicker he finished with me the quicker I could go to sleep.
I sighed, reaching up to wipe my face off some, "Because I knew if I told you that it was kinda Curly's idea you wouldn't let me hang out with him anymore," I mumbled, voice thick with tears, "And he's my friend and I don't want you to do that."
I sounded all of four years old. It was pathetic.
"I understand that, Ponyboy," Darry said quietly, squeezing my hand, "But that's exactly what I'm going to do. I'm sorry, but Curly gets you into trouble."
I whined, instantly snatching my hand back out of Darry's hold, "That's not fair! Curly doesn't make me do anything!"
"Yeah, I know," Darry said, frowning, "That's what makes me even more disappointed in you. You always know better but you always still go along with him."
My face fell at the dreaded d-word. Darry knows how just how much I hate when he tells me that, which is why he doesn't say it a whole lot. It only makes me feel worse when he actually does say it, though, because that means he genuinely is disappointed in me. I cried a little harder, desperately wishing I could cover my face again. I was going to apologize, but Darry started talking again before I could.
"As long as you wanna act like a child and follow your friend around doing whatever he does, then you're not gonna see that friend," Darry stated firmly, ignoring my tears completely, "And the lying to me so you don't have to face consequences? That shit stops now. I'm not gonna punish you for it this time, but if I catch you lying to my face like that again, we're going to have a serious problem. Do I make myself clear?"
His tone had me nodding without a second thought. I really, really didn't like that he'd just called me a child and forbade me from seeing my best friend, but there was pretty much nothing I could do about it. Arguing with him would be pointless, and it would probably just land me into more trouble. I was just glad he wasn't gonna punish me for lying about who's idea it was. The fewer things he had to spank me for, the better.
"Good," Darry praised gently, his voice softer now, "Now do you wanna talk about what you said while we were in the waiting room?"
I groaned. Darry knew damn well I didn't want to talk about it. Especially since I still wasn't going to back down.
"You're gonna tell me his name, Ponyboy," Darry said, crossing his arms over his chest. It was just a statement. He said it the same way a person would say the sky was blue – like a fact.
"No," I disagreed quietly, not wanting to make him any more upset but also wanting him to know that he wasn't going to win, "I'm not telling you unless you promise me that you won't do nothin' dumb."
"Ponyboy," Darry started, and the warning tone was back, "I understand that you worry about your brother and me but I'm not asking. You're gonna tell me, one way or another."
I grimaced a little at the vague threat. If I told him about Christopher, he'd kill him as soon as he was given the chance. I couldn't have that.
I sighed, gathering up the little bit of courage I had and raising my chin defiantly. "I'm not telling you unless you promise, Dar. It doesn't matter what you do."
"Oh, really?" Darry's asked, eyebrows raising in what I would have called amusement if I didn't know any better, "So if I go get the strap right now and start using it on your ass you still wouldn't be willing?"
My face fell again, and I felt my resolve slipping. My bottom lip started to wobble and I felt a fresh set of tears well up in my eyes.
"That's not fair!" I countered through my tears, balling my fists up. He shouldn't be threatening to punish me when I'm trying to do the right thing.
"You yell at me for doin' stupid stuff and putting myself in danger then you turn around and threaten to whip me for trying to keep you from doin' something that can put you in jail!" I practically yelled, still crying but too angry to care.
Darry's stern face fell some, but I kept going before he had a chance to start.
"Y'all are always telling me that it's just the three of us and we gotta stick together and that's why you're so tough on me, but if that's the case then the rules can't only apply to me!" I said loudly, wiping some of my tears in annoyance, "That's not fair! You're in charge and all and you make the rules but it don't matter! You've gotta stay alive and out of jail, too, and so does Sodapop, so you two can't do stupid shit either, or else being so overprotective with me is pointless."
I wasn't quite sure where my sudden burst of confidence came from, but it disappeared just as quickly as it came. I'd actually yelled at him and swore at him, which were both big no-no's in his book. He really doesn't allow me to be disrespectful in general, especially while I'm already in trouble.
I held my breath for a moment, staring at the bed while I waited for Darry to say something. It was hard to be scared of getting popped in the mouth, but I still stood by everything I said. He can't expect me to try to stay alive and out of jail if he won't do the same thing.
He must have realized how hypocritical he was being because he sighed and dropped his head. "You're right," He said quietly, nodding to himself, "I'm being stupid."
Well, that definitely wasn't what I expected. I looked up at him again, obviously confused.
"I can't expect you and Soda to not do dumb shit if I can't do the same," He admitted, meeting my gaze again, "I'm sorry I yelled at you, Pony. It's just…Part of me really wants to hurt that son of a bitch, but the part of me that has to take care of you and your brother knows better."
I sighed, crawling forward so I was on his lap. He pulled me against his chest, and I happily cuddled against him with a content sigh. I was still crying, but the new position was much better.
"It's okay, Dar," I said quietly, lying my head over his heart, "I get why you wanna kill him. It's probably for the best you don't know who it is, though."
Darry chuckled, his chest rumbling under my head, "Yeah, kiddo, you're probably right."
My following giggle turned into a yawn before I could help it and I nuzzled my head against Darry's chest. I was about two seconds away from closing my eyes when Darry pushed me back some.
"Not yet, Pony," Darry said quietly, looking down at me, "Last time I checked, you still earned a trip over my knee."
I disagreed, but I knew that wouldn't really matter to him. Besides, I was too tired to argue with him, anyways.
Wanting to get it over with, I dragged myself off of the bed and stood in front of him. Pouting and sniffling, I picked at the carpet with my toes and waited for his directions.
He adjusted himself so he was sitting in his usual position on the edge of the bed before he reached out to grab one of my wrists. He pulled me a bit closer to him, but I used my feet to stop myself before he could get me over his knee.
"Wait," I whined, giving him a wary look through my tears, "You ain't taking your belt off?"
I expected him to whoop me at the very least, but he just chuckled and shook his head, "You're too tired for all that right now. C'mon."
I only had a split second to be relieved before Darry pulled me over his knee. I whined again, but I didn't fight him. Just as expected, my boxers and my jeans went down to my knees.
"I'm gonna tan your hide, and then you're gonna get some sleep," Darry said, adjusting me over his knees and wrapping an arm around my waist, "And if you wake up with the same attitude you've had all day, then you'll get my belt on top of what I'm about to give you. That understood?"
My cheeks heated up in embarrassment, but I quickly nodded.
Darry patted my back a couple times in acknowledgment before resting his hand on my bottom. I squirmed, whining out a pitiful and useless protest.
"What happens if you don't keep still?" Darry asked gently, tightening his hold on me.
I groaned internally. I hated when he asked me questions, but I knew from experience that it's always easier to just cooperate.
"I get extra," I mumbled, gripping his thigh.
"That's right," Darry replied, patting my butt, "So what are you gonna do?"
"I'm gonna sit still!" I cried impatiently, wishing he'd stop talking and just spank me already. I was already crying, the only thing I was waiting on was the sting.
I got my wish, because he brought his heavy hand down sharply, making me flinch.
"Ow!" I whined, burying my face in the bed.
"Watch your tone, Ponyboy," Darry warned, rubbing the spot he'd swatted to alleviate the sting some.
"Sorry," I whined, squirming in anticipation. I was nervous and he was dragging it out at that point.
"Mhm," Darry hummed, lifting one of his legs up some so my ass was an easier target, "You ready?"
"Not really," I grumbled, tightening my grip on Darry's leg and bracing myself. I tried not to tense up, but it was hard not to when I knew what was coming.
Both fortunately and unfortunately, Darry didn't make me wait any longer before he began a steady rhythm of swats. I was bawling from the very beginning, kicking my feet and trying not to squirm too much so I didn't get into any more trouble.
It was pretty obvious he was going easy on me, even though it still hurt like hell. It was mostly just surface sting, though, and I knew by the time I woke up after my nap, I'd barely even feel it. At the time though, I was so tired and upset it didn't take very much to have me crying and apologizing.
Darry must have known that because the spanking probably wasn't even half of what I deserved. It didn't really matter, though, because it still made me plenty sorry.
The worst of it was when I kicked a little too hard and he took it out on my thighs. He was well aware how sensitive my thighs were, and he knew just how to use that in his favor.
I pushed myself up onto my elbows and wailed, but Darry didn't stop until I finally got the sense to at least try and sit still instead of flailing all around. I didn't really succeed, but Darry must have noticed my efforts because he finally stopped and gave me a break.
I dropped my head back down, crying in earnest into my arms. He rubbed my back, waiting for me to calm down some before he spoke.
"Pony," Darry started after I'd stopped crying so hard, removing his hand from my back, "Do you know why you're being punished?"
Ugh. My least favorite part is when he makes me answer questions, but it always indicates that we're almost done, so I behave.
"Uh, not specifically," I admitted, dragging the back of my hand under my nose, "But I've got a general idea?"
Darry chuckled, patting my side with the hand he was using to keep me in place, "Give me the general idea, then, Pony."
"Uh, well, I technically started a f-fight at school, even though I didn't actually hit him first, but apparently that doesn't matter anymore," I found myself bratting out of habit, but Darry didn't take long to shut it down.
He cut me off with two sharp slaps to my sit spots. I let out a high pitched whine, drumming my toes against the floor to try and deal with the sting. A fresh set of tears welled up in my eyes and started rolling down my already wet cheeks.
"You're not in a good position to be being mouthy, Pony," Darry scolded. I could practically hear the frown he was undoubtedly wearing.
I bawled out another apology, even though it probably wasn't too clear. Those two swats hurt. I really need to stop smarting off.
"You're right, though," Darry said after another minute or so of him rubbing my back so I'd stop crying as hard, "You started that fight, Ponyboy, and if you weren't as stubborn as a mule then you wouldn't be trying to deny it."
I sighed. Part of me knew he was right in every aspect, but the other part of me still wanted tooth and nail against it.
At the end of the day, Darry would win anyway, so I nodded slightly. "I know," I whispered, "Sorry, Dar."
"You fighting and doing other disruptive shit like that at school will have Child Protective Services back on our asses in a heartbeat, Ponybaby," Darry said quietly, reaching up so he could play with my hair, "None of us want that, right?"
I had my head buried in Darry's leg, but I still attempted to shake my head no. I'd die if they took me away from Darry and Soda, even if one of them is an overprotective, spank-happy, jackass.
"Yeah, that's what I thought," Darry said easily, "That's why you can't do stuff like that. It was already hell getting them to let me keep you and your brother the first time, we don't need nothin' increasing our chances of me losing you now. You understand?"
I cried a little harder at the thought of being taken away from my brothers. It scared me like hell how easily it could happen, and Darry knew that. I've had enough nightmares about it, he better know.
"Yes, sir," I whimpered out, lifting my head up some so he could hear me, "I understand."
"And you understand that if this happens again I ain't gonna be so nice about it, don't you?" Darry asked, and I knew he had an eyebrow arched. I could hear it in his voice.
I peeked over my shoulder and seen that I was right, but his face softened a little when he saw mine.
Tears were still steadily streaming down my face and I was ready to be up in his lap, so I nodded and gave him my best woebegone expression.
His lips kicked up at the ends at the sight of my pouting, but he didn't relent, "I asked you a question, Ponyboy," he stated, his eyebrows raising in warning.
I sighed before nodding, "I understand, Dar. I'm sorry."
He probably deserved a better apology, but I was mentally, physically, and emotionally drained and my brain was short circuiting. We both knew that I was repentant, so he didn't press.
"Alright, then," Darry said quietly, finally releasing his hold on my waist, "Good boy."
I squirmed a little at the praise before beginning to try and push myself up. We were finally finished and I wanted a hug.
"Want up with you," I whined, trying to push myself back into a standing position.
Darry halted me for a moment so he could return my boxers to their original position and remove my jeans completely, tossing them towards the hamper across the room. Darry held me by my torso to help me into a standing position, and then pulled me back down into his lap. He adjusted me so my burning bottom dipped in between his parted legs and gently guided my head into his chest.
"There you go, Pony," Darry said over my cries, rubbing my back, "You're okay. You did good, honey."
He gets better at comforting me every time I get punished, and I'm beyond grateful he doesn't push me away after he lights a fire in my ass. Being able to shamelessly cuddle with my big brother when we were done made getting spanked bearable.
I bawled into Darry's chest until I was too tired to move. He held me the whole time, quietly urging me to fall asleep as I calmed down.
I never have any issues falling asleep after Darry spanks me – getting whooped is hard work. Between that and the fact that I was running on three hours of sleep and had already had a very long day, I'd never been more ready to let my brain rest.
Once I'd finally stopped crying and was just blinking sleepily at the wall, Darry stood up and gently placed me in my bed.
"Here you go, kiddo," He said softly as he pulled the blanket up over me, "You get some sleep."
I nodded, nuzzling my face against my pillow, "Okay," I replied softly.
"I'll be in the living room," He informed me quietly, perching himself on the edge of the bed, "Your brother gets off soon. I'll make sure he's quiet when he comes through here, okay?"
I hummed, nodding again. I was barely awake, but I was used to the routine. Darry talks me to sleep a lot.
"Okay," he said quietly, leaning down to kiss my forehead, "You know I love you, right?"
"Mhm," I hummed sleepily, opening one eye so I could look up at my big brother, "Love you, too."
He smiled a little, kissing my forehead again before standing up to leave. I closed my eyes again, and I was out before he ever turned off the light.
Author's Note (Please Read!)
Since the storyline from this point on is different from the original story and the revised chapters could no longer be read with the originals, I've decided to delete the last of the originals and only upload new ones from here on out. So, no more revises, only new chapters! I may dabble with some of the scenarios from the original chapters, but overall they'll be completely different.
As usual, please leave comments, I always really appreciate reading feeback!
