Dear Writers of Fanfic
I, Thranduil, King of Mirkwood, do not know at which point I established myself as a homophobic yet incestuous, abusive, maniac of a father, but I am nonetheless disgusted. I am not a practitioner, nor do I care about whatever filth "Pimp" means, but I have ways of...persuading you to stop writing such vile rubbish.
I hate each and everyone of you, and I hope that some day I may be able to free your head from your wretched shoulders.
