Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of the characters pertaining to Twilight. If I did, that would be awesome, but sadly I don't.
Beauty and the Geek
Chapter 8- Nothing To Lose
"Jasper, I can't do this, I can't I can't I can't. I'm sorry, but I can't go through with it."
"You know, Edward, you're my best friend and all, but sometimes you can be a real stubborn-ass." Jasper's comment surprised me, for it was rare that he cursed, and especially at me; I knew I irritated him on occasion, and that this was one of those times. Though I had previously agreed to his absurd idea, I was having second thoughts. It would be embarrassing enough to ask my best friend's mom to make us over, but it would be far more humiliating to have to actually be poked and prodded with various tools of beauty.
Nearly pushing me up the steps, my captor gave me a gentle, yet firm push on my back into the small house that had lured me away from the library that had previously occupied all of my time. My rusted piece of tin lay on its side on the small patch of lawn that made a green, fuzzy spot next to the cement driveway. Stepping through the wooden door frame, my heart began to pound relentlessly in my chest sending more blood to my healing face.
My nose had healed with the best possible result; it remained straight and did not appear to have any bumps on it. The bruising had faded almost in its entirety, leaving only a light yellow hue to my cheek and eyelid. Unfortunately, after two weeks of ice and lowering my blood pressure, my wounds did not heal enough to inspire me to attend the day when the class photo was being taken. Due to the fact that I would refuse to appear, Jasper had refused as well, saying the head wound he had suffered made his head swollen, including the front and was embarrassed by it. He later told me the truth, saying that he did not feel right taking the picture without me.
Entering the living room, Mrs. Whitlock greeted us with a wide smile on her face.
"Hi guys! How was your last day of school? Was it exciting?" She ran up to us and hugged us both, and then began fixing Jasper's shirt which apparently was not hanging right.
"Well, you know. Same old, same old." My friend answered for us as I stood awkwardly with trembles moving up and down my spine. My face was already reddening from the proposition Jazz and I were about to make.
"Oh, I don't believe that! My baby boy is a junior! Seems like it was only yesterday that you were in diapers!"
"Mom, pleeeease. Not in front of Edward..." Jasper pleaded.
"That's because it was." I added, teasing Jasper who glared at me and sat me down at the kitchen counter where his mom was scribbling on a notepad by the refrigerator. In front of us, Mrs. Whitlock placed two soda cans which we immediately accepted. Our thirsts were quenched, and my nerves were shot from nervousness.
"Calm down, dude. It will be fine, I mean, it's my mom for god's sake." I looked at him with evil eyes.
"How would you feel if you were asking Esme for a makeover?"
"I see your point." I sipped my soda with the confidence that he now understood my predicament."So, how do we go about doing this?"
"Just let me do all the talking." I did not protest his plan. His mother hung up the phone and walked toward us.
"So, Jasper. What's all this about?" Jazz had probably told her to get home early that day because he needed to talk to her about something. Great.
"Well, mom. You know how you keep saying I need a haircut and new clothes and stuff? Um, Edward's mom has been saying the same thing too, and we were wondering if..."
"Oh my god, you want me to make you over? I have never been so excited! I have wanted to do this for so long! And Edward, you too! Oh, there are so many things to arrange! First, the hair has got to go..." she said as she looked over my appearance that was no better than shabby. "And your glasses, well, you're not opposed to contacts, right? And the clothes, well, we can fix that. Are you sure your parents won't mind?" She said after her analysis.
What would Esme and Carlisle think of it? I had already told them about our endevour, and about the amount it may cost, and with their excitement and surprise, were happy to oblige. How would they react when I returned home? How would Ireact to my future reflection? Suddenly, I thought about something my Chemistry teacher had told me months before Jasper had even moved to Forks. I did not recall what his exact words were, but I did figure out what they meant, and it was then that I had no regrets about what Jasper and I were about to do.
"I already asked them, and they are very greatful to you, you have no idea." I replied, thinking about how my lengthy hair bothered my mother as well.
"It was about time we took a trip to Seattle...is this weekend okay? You could get your stuff from your house and spend the night here if you want Edward." I accepted the offer and Jazz and I began the trip back to the white mansion by the river.
Striding side by side, I found myself confessing to Jasper the more threatening, the terrifying reason that I was truly afraid of the horror we were about to endure. We were quiet for a long moment; a comfortable silence, not out of awkwardness, but I knew that any second now, my trembles would be exposed to my friend no matter what I did to restraining them. Inhaling deeply, I knew that he was aware that my troubles were suddenly about to be laid out to him as he did the same.
"Jazz..." I started with hesitance. "Jazz, what if this doesn't work?" He looked at me with confusion in his eyes, though he comprehended every word spoken by me.
"What do you mean? What could go wrong? It's not as if my mother will take us to the wrong people or anything." Suspicion was readable in his voice.
"I mean, what if this doesn't make a difference? What if everything returns to be the way we left them, or even worse with our--er, my stupidity?" Jasper contemplated this, and his serene, ocean eyes were searching for answers in the far away place they found themselves in.
"I don't know, Edward. But what other choice did we have?" Thinking he had finished his sentence, I had opened my mouth to speak when he silenced my thought. "When you've got nothing, you've got nothing to lose." The doubt that had stifled my every breath had shed itself; weight peeled from the exterior of my skin freeing me at last of the cynicism and negative thoughts that kept me shackled to my current existence.
"Thanks, Jasper."
"For what?" He replied dully; it was if he always somehow knew how people felt.
"For everything." Silence rang through the forest, but as the snaking river made its existence known, we were warped back to the purpose that drew us here.
Entering through the back door, we found my parents sitting on the couch. My mother's hand was clasped tightly in Carlisle's while their tangled fingers rested on his knee. Esme's caramel hair draped over the shoulder she laid her head on. The two stared blankly at the TV with love in their sparkling eyes- clearly unrelated to the mindless program that shifted the colors on the monitor. As I watched this scene when time seemed at a standstill, the stifling tightness that I thought I had shed in the forest earlier had returned, only this time not in the right place. My previously wrenching stomach was calm, while my chest belt as if it had been punched from within, as if my own heart had slammed its side into my chest plate.
The voice of my father restarted my heart and erased the pang in my chest, even if only temporary, which I desperately hoped was not the case.
"Hello, Edward, Jasper." He twisted his head around to look at us, as did my mother. "What can I do for you?" What could he do for me? Could he make the future weekend even a fraction less terrifying or humiliating? I doubted it.
"Um, Mom, Dad. Remember that uh- thing- I told you about earlier? Well, Mrs. Whitlock wants to know if it's alright if I spend the night at Jasper's house..." this was the part that was hard enough for me to swallow, no less having to tell my parents my friend's mom was taking me for an entire weekend to Seattle to do god only knows what to me. "...and then she wants to take us to Seattle for the weekend to um, well, yeah." I still could not force out the words. Luckily, my parents were intelligent people and would get the hint.
Esme and Carlilse stared into each other's eyes for a moment, having a wordless debate among themselves. Surrendering, they put my racing heart at ease when they spoke their answer.
"If that is what you want, son." It wasn't what I wanted, but it was the answer I wanted. Even if Jasper had to use physical force to drag me into whatever salon or store-and he probably would- I did not want them to say no. Strange, even for a freak like me.
After ascending the stairs, Jazz sat on my bed while I gathered up my things.
"How many days are we talking about, here?" I asked as I dug through my drawers that were overflowing with unfolded clothes and unmatched socks. The entire room that I occupied was a mess. My curtains were tacked crookedly above my window, my comforter more on the floor than the bed. Pillows were strewn around the mattress due to my sleepless nights spent tossing and turning. The computer on my desk was bulky and old, and the monitor served better as a second table than an actual electronic. The parts of the chaotic space that were not flooded with clutter were utterly pale and lifeless.
I could not help but think that this room suited me; a mess on the outside, that when cleaned up, would only prove to be dreary and plain.
"Uh, I guess including tonight...we'll probably come home on Monday." Great. Since when were weekends extended to Mondays? I growled under my breath and tossed a few pairs of clothing in my duffel bag. Not that I would need those clothes by Monday, anyway, but it made me feel better that I had them, at least.
Packed and ready to be whisked away to who knows where in Seattle, I said my goodbyes and was out the door once more to Jasper's house.
Jazz fell asleep long before I did. Between my four hours sleep, I tried with all my might to steer my thoughts from the certainly horrendous weekend ahead of me. Tossing and turning, I distracted myself with the peaceful breathing of my friend in the sleeping bag beside me. He was always so peaceful, so serene. Rarely was expression changed, and when it was, it was shyness tilting his head down and diverting his eyes to any other. The only time I had seen him frightened in any way was that fateful day that sent us to the hospital, when Emmett was staring him down. He had often told me he was scared, and while I saw it in his face, I did not see fear in his face. I saw the peace that came when speaking the truth.
I had seen it when he had suggested this idea in the first place. More importantly, I had seen it when he had said we had nothing to lose. Inhaling deeply, I drifted off to sleep with this last thought. Nothing to lose. Nothing to lose. Nothing...
