Fanny arrived at Netherfield hall in the morning with just enough time to receive a quick tour with the housekeeper of the beautiful decorations and rooms. The Bingleys had greatly improved many portions of the house before they arrived and everything was done in the first stare of fashion. There were even some rather too fashionable and less useful pieces with claw feet and ornate carvings. Fanny thought, were she wealthy she would certainly not fill her house with furniture that served no actual purpose. She hinted towards that modestly to the housekeeper who answered tactfully and dutifully, "I often enjoy looking at these pieces as I do my work. Miss Bingley is particularly enchanted with this style." Fanny smiled and read between the lines. The housekeeper probably thought they were purposeless and as she had already observed Miss Bingley in her shop, she knew that that lady had more money than taste.
They concluded the tour in the kitchen where Fanny had left her things to finish one last delicate piece in Netherfield's ovens. She had provided a beautiful spread from her bakery and from the smells surrounding her the rest of the food would be lovely as well. She worked with single minded diligence not noticing staff come and go until a hand on her waist interrupted her ministrations. She turned and saw James and said, "If you would have caused me to ruin this cake I would have sent you straight to Mr. Bingley to have yourself reported to a magistrate!"
He laughed over her shoulder and said, "Indeed I believe you would have but I am here to make your cake yet better my dearest one. The children have been busy picking blackberries and I have come with this delicious looking offering. Are you making your signature work?"
"What else? I nearly thought I did not have enough eggs! It is not right yet, I am still working on this recipe. I want it to be lighter still. It shall probably be the death of me! Nearly ten years I have worked to make this cake exactly what I want and it is still not there." She looked at her batter and sighed and James saw the look of intense concentration cross her face and she said absently, "I need a better composition of ingredients and I need a different instrument to beat the whites."
He turned her around and looked into her eyes and said, "You are the smartest woman I have ever met, if it can be done you will do it and I think your cake as it is is heavenly. Yes, indeed, so heavenly the angels could eat it! Angel food."
"If ever they name a cake by that name I shall quit the art!"
James smiled and moved so that they were as close as was proper for an unmarried couple and said, "If you could quit the art of solving your problems with that wit I have come to adore then I could as soon quit loving you and since I know one of those is not possible in this life then the other follows as a falsehood."
Fanny felt the tug of his nearness and his love and once again cursed the time remaining until the wedding. She said, "You sir are merely enamored with me because I refused to like you or to have you!"
"That may be, but I believe it was because I could never again abide living with a woman with cases of the nerves, fear of the vapors or a proclivity to lay about in silliness and boredom." He held her hand and said, "To me you are the woman I never thought existed."
She squeezed his hand back and said, "To me you are the man I never thought existed. Now, if you do not go and the housekeeper comes in here and sees me not at work you really might not exist anymore. She is very firm you know."
With a wink he said, "Then I shall go but you will not get rid of me that easy in two weeks!"
Fanny finished the cake and put it in the oven willing herself not to stand there watching it to make sure it rose properly. She instead occupied herself in helping the newly arrived additional cook staff to prepare some of the other dishes for the evening. She was very excited for the ball even though she was not a true participant. It was a pleasure to her to see her work enjoyed and relished. There was merriment in their work and they were in the midst of some friendly banter when Miss Penny Tillar came into the kitchen. Fanny recognized the slight, blonde woman who had come into her shop with a little girl in tow and asked first for a job and then for the old bread at discount. It seemed she was looking for her because when Penny saw her she grabbed a potato next to her and proceeded to start to peel. She waited until the din in the kitchen got loud again and she said in a low voice, "Miss Abright. I know it is quite forward of me given your generosity to my little family but I wondered if I could have a word with you?"
"Yes of course dear, and you know that is nothing. You pay for your bread the same as everyone else."
Penny blushed, "But I pay half and your goodness is not lost on me. I thank you. Do you think we could slip off where we might not be overheard?"
"I suppose." They both finished the work they had in hand and then they excused themselves. In the small servant dining area behind the kitchen they were alone and as soon as Fanny closed the door behind her Miss Tillar burst into tears. Fanny comforted her as best as she could but she had no idea how to stem the tide. Finally Penny was just softly sobbing and Fanny asked, "My dear, what can be so bad?"
It took some seconds for her to answer but eventually Fanny regained enough control of her emotions to say, "Miss Albright, I have received a letter from Mrs. Annesley. I believe that you are connected with that lady as well?"
Fanny gasped, "Yes! Did you attend her school?"
She answered, "I did but you were near graduation when I began and I have always been quiet and reserved."
"I do not remember you but it is likely my fault. My, what a small, small kingdom. What were the contents of this letter?"
"The kingdom is small indeed but I am actually intentionally in Meryton because of Mrs. Annesley." She stopped and wrung her hands and looked at Fanny with the largest and sweetest eyes and said, "If I tell you something please promise not the think poorly of me or Mrs. Annesley."
Fanny smiled a slight smile at this, "What little I know of you and the vast the deal I know of Mrs. Annesley would seem to indicate that it is not possible for me to think poorly of you or her, but please continue. I shall be fair."
"Oh, you are too kind. Mrs. Annesley said that you would be. I shall endeavor to tell all." She looked at Fanny with guilt and said, "It is not by mistake that I am here in Meryton and that you are here. When I came to Mrs. Annesley looking for another job she told me she knew of a previous student who worked independently in the small village of Meryton and from whom I was likely to receive work or kindness or both. We used you without your knowledge while relying on your charity."
"My dear you are all sweetness but you need not worry. Knowing or not knowing you have Mrs. Annesley's recommendation did not form my opinion of you. Your character did. From the first moment I met you and your little Emma I was convinced that you were well intentioned and sought only to provide for your little one."
"Oh dear. You are making this quite difficult. Do not think me an angel. I have not just imposed on your charity. I have imposed on your connections and your position in this small town though you may not realize it."
Fanny looked at her with a knowing look and said, "Certainly I realize that my connections were instrumental in getting you the job you have here but do not feel imposed on. Why exist as neighbors and humanity if we are unwilling to help our neighbors and live in community? And honestly, Penny, you must know that I selfishly take pleasures in being involved in peoples foibles. Especially the humorous ones."
Penny shook her head, "No, you do not yet understand. Yes, your position amongst these people provided me with an honest living but you also afforded me protection from their judgment, opened doors for me around town and provided relationships that would not have otherwise existed."
"Silly girl, I only achieved in a shorter amount of time what you would have achieved by the strength of your person. People would not have shunned you long here. Come, let us have no more talk of this." She smiled and chuckled a bit as she put one arm around Penny and continued, "Really, I must send a letter to Mrs. Annesley and tell her what a good joke this all is."
Abruptly, Penny grabbed hand draped over her shoulder and turned to Fanny and said, "No. This is not a joke. I am in great danger and as you have been the instrument of my salvation before I need you to be my escape from that danger."
"What? What can you mean danger? What are the contents of this letter?"
"If you wish to understand that we must go back to another time. A time when, to me, the world was brighter and more gay. I was young and naive as all young women tend to be but perhaps more trusting in the goodness of humanity and my fellow man than I am now."
Penny Mills was Mrs. Annesley's most enchanting and beautiful student. She was a natural study in all areas and excelled particularly in music and literature and she was to be Mrs. Annesley's star pupil in her annual ball. It was tradition at the school for the girls to plan and organize a school and family funded ball during their eighteenth year. Usually only two or three girls were of that age a year so that it was quite an undertaking. It was perhaps, beyond the social calling of her pupils but she figured if they could throw a fine public ball then they could throw any private, small party with ample success. It served also as a sort of coming out for the reduced social stature of her students. They would never enjoy a true season in London as a debutante, but she provided a lovely option for them to see and be seen by men and women of similar standing.
Harriet Annesley had it from a good source that Miss Penny Mills was descended from better stock then her ordinary pupil. She was the second cousin, twice removed of a current Viscount but there had been two unfavorable matches in her line, a grandmother and her father, too many children and then a living found in trade that caused the family to break official ties with the Mills. Penny did not seem to feel the loss and her father's marriage, though disappointing to the family, was a constant source of happiness to their children. They were a close knit family with the usual troubles mitigated by a lot of love, patience and humor.
On the night of the ball Penny was lovely and demure and the center of attention. Her mother marveled at her grace and her father felt that his money had been well spent at Mrs. Annesley's school. Harriet received many compliments on her finishing and there was a steady flow of young men who sought introductions. One such young man was Mr. George Wickham and though not all of the young men were permitted introductions he seemed to be one of the few who managed to meet Penny and engage her for a dance.
At the time, Mr. Wickham was still moderately flush with the settlement that Mr. Darcy gave him and he was carefree and incredibly magnetic. He was charming and open with her. He talked honestly and truthfully of his shortcomings and history to her in a way that he had not spoken of them in years. Penny had that effect on him and many others. People felt secure in her goodness and fairness. She never judged harsh a penitent soul. He begged her for a second dance and in the course of two dances Mr. Wickham knew he was in love for the first time. She was so fine a lady that even Mr. Darcy would not have found fault with her and on top of that she was of a similar station in life. It would have been too uncharacteristically altruistic of him not to also take into consideration her handsome dowry. She would come into some four thousand pounds upon her marriage.
After several weeks of acquaintance with Penny and her family, Mr. Wickham begged her father for Penny's hand in marriage. Mr. Mills was not pleased with the impulsive decision making displayed by such a declaration but he judged Mr. Wickham as a decent sort of young man and he had pleasing and seemingly open manners. Later that week Penny and George went on a seaside walk with her siblings leading or lagging them but generally playing enough to let the couple truly talk. Mr. Wickham was infatuated with the sweet English rose next to him. He poured out his heart to her. He confessed his feelings of inferiority as a boy and a steward the ancient Darcy family, he reminisced about his favored childhood and his lost friendship with Mr. Darcy and was even eminently fair about how their friendship dissolved saying, "The truth of it is, Miss Mills, I hated him because I was not him and all of my actions manifested that." He even went into great detail, with her permission, about his mistakes and bad decisions at Oxford and thereafter.
Penny, green in the ways of the world, needed an explanation on some of the finer points but as he continued to talk, her heart became softer and softer towards him and she felt that he was a man deserving of her pity. In a way he had spoken her language of love. She had found someone who was deeply broken and needed mending. Her heart felt a tug to be his balm. When he asked her if she would consent to be his wife and allow him to court her she felt herself honor bound to be the instrument of heaven in this man's life and consented. He stayed for dinner and after dinner they talked into the evening of their plans for the future. Plans to make amends to the Darcy family, pursue the law, visit the continent and even one day, purchase a small piece of land to call their own.
When Penny looked back at this bittersweet memory she believed even then- if she could have divorced her pity and love from her intellect- that George Wickham would never change. She wanted him to change and he was perhaps even in love with her enough that he wanted to change but like so many other resolves in that vacillating young man's life his discipline was short lived. On a night two months later when they were engaged to take a twilight stroll in the city gardens, George did not show. She waited hours for him and finally went to her mother's room and cried into her arms her concern that he was hurt or injured. The next morning, he appeared at her door looking as if he had not shaven and smelling as if he had been in the streets near the fish market over night. He begged for her forgiveness for his appearance and his absence and, for the first time of many times, he lied to her about his whereabouts and his actions. Penny, unused to deception, did not doubt his story about helping a family in distress at the docks and was so pleased with his chivalry that she allowed him the liberty of a kiss.
This cycle became more and more frequent and, though she was back in school and busy until she wed, she frequently wondered where her affianced was and the seed of doubt began to creep into her mind. One afternoon as they walked about the school grounds with one of the teachers in loose attendance, Penny swore that she saw one of her classmates glance sideways at him and wink as she walked by. She called Mr. Wickham to task immediately. He denied any such shared look and Penny, rather than persisting, looked so downcast and then began to blame herself for being jealous with such vigor that Mr. Wickham cried out for her to cease and confessed all of his misdeeds in the last three months. Her innocence and openness was irresistible. He had gambled, drank to excess and had even flirted with several of her classmates. She was angry but it was not in her nature to withhold forgiveness and as their time was short, he talked her into a secret rendezvous that night to further smooth over their difficulties and make amends.
George showed up in the small copse on the school grounds precisely on time, looking as fresh as ever with flowers and all the penitence of someone whose heart is truly breaking over his decisions. She believed, and it is possible that he believed, that his actions were a relapse into his previous behavior that would never happen again since they had brought her such pain. They were all set to part with a chaste kiss when George's passion got the best of him and he gently encircled her with his arms and began his slow seduction in a whisper with the breeze. All thoughts of his reformation were apparently lost to him and Penny was the innocent victim in a game that George had played many times with more hard willed women. He used the typical arguments about a man needing a woman and how their love naturally meant that they ought to be intimate and then he began to compliment her for her virtues while he distracted her virgin body with a type of heat and bliss she had never felt. At first she was very uncomfortable but her innocence and his argument about love and his need held her there and then when her hormones and her natural femininity began to take over she forgot to feel uncomfortable and allowed him to talk her into each loving act. In his defense he was an unnaturally attentive lover and he did still feel very much in love with Penny so he brought her to heights of pleasure that she never thought possible. When he finally claimed her maidenhood she never felt any pain, only more mounting pleasure as she looked with intense love in George's eyes. As they both came down from their physical high however, the soft glow of adoration that was previously there was replaced momentarily with something more sterile and more flinty than she had ever seen there and she asked on the verge of a sob, "Did I do something wrong?"
He looked at her and smiled and softened again and said, "No, no. We should just get you in before any one finds you are missing." As he walked to the bar from the copse he thought, "Every wench, even the ones you think you love, are all the same. I had to know. I thought it would be different with her but it was not. D- it to hell that I am committed to her. The slut."
From that night, George became more scarce to her than ever before. When they were together in public he was still warm in her company but his warmth lacked the same depth. He did not blow off commitments to her but neither did he make many. Penny considered, because of their actions on that fateful night, that they were already married so it was out of the question to think of breaking the engagement and when a month had passed without her menses she began to be frantic to find a moment alone with George to tell him. After another week she got him alone in the drawing room in her home and told him her situation. He almost visibly became green and said hurtfully, "From one time you dumb chit? It cannot possibly be mine." She ran crying from the room. He did not chase. When next she saw him he avoided her company in a public assembly for as long as he could before people would notice and then he danced with her and she merely said, "It is not true. It is yours. What shall we do?" He did not answer and bowed at the conclusion of the dance and then proceeded to dance the next three reels with the most buxom flirts in the room while she watched on in pain.
Penny decided that the only thing she could do was to turn to her family for help as much as it would hurt them. Her mother and her father could not believe their ears and when she described George's recent attitude towards her they were first agog and then livid. This was not to be borne. They would marry and avert the scandal. They would move up the wedding and could marry next week and settle afterwards they told Penny. Later that night, Mr. Mills pistol on the table in front of Mr. Wickham was enough to convince that gentlemen that those terms were acceptable.
Thank you so much for reading. Please comment. I hope I wasn't too hard on Mr. Wickham. Perhaps if Penny had come around before his Oxford days.
