8
She doesn't come back the next day.
Not that he cares.
It is already late in the afternoon.
Zuko stops wiping the counter and looks upwards, his eyes traveling towards the table where Jin usually sits.
It is empty.
He growls, slams the rag he is holding unto the table and begins wiping the counter in an angry fashion. Pao and his uncle pause from their conversation to look at him, his uncle with a bemused expression on his face and Pao with a disapproving frown on his lips.
"The pot of Jasmine tea is getting cold," Iroh remarks as he takes the teapot in his hands and opens the lid to peer at its contents. He gives his nephew a meaningful look. "Jin should've been here by now."
Zuko snorts and looks away. Pao rests his chin above his hands as he stares at Jin's usual table and confidently says, "She comes by late sometimes because of work. I'm sure that she'll be here by the evening."
Zuko tries to ignore the little surge of hope that swells from within his chest when Pao says that.
The day continues on quickly.
A group of men from the Terra Team come to the shop to order rounds and rounds of ginseng tea. Someone named Tycho comes over a few minutes later and Zuko learns that he is another friend of his uncle—apparently they met when Tycho tried to mug Iroh. Tycho tells his uncle that he has finally become a masseuse and Iroh invites him over for a celebratory cup of tea. His uncle starts flirting with a bunch of old ladies (much to Zuko's disgust) by telling his favorite tea joke.
Eventually, the hour before curfew comes. The three of them wait for the last of the customers to clear out before wiping all the tables and chairs for one last time. Pao counts the sales in the moneybox. Iroh stacks all the cups and pots back into the cabinets. Zuko makes the inventory report after he pushes all the tables and chairs to the sides. Pao quickly shuts all the windows when he finishes counting the money and Zuko and Iroh take both of their aprons off.
Finally, they step outside, lock the door and place a "closed" sign over the doorknob.
She doesn't come back at all.
She doesn't go back to the teashop the next day.
Not that she cares.
It is already late in the afternoon.
Jin is in the middle of attacking the weeds in the tomato patch with her sickle when her grandfather comes stomping into the garden, his bushy brows dipped downwards in fury. He stops in front of her and folds his arms. Jin sighs and ignores as him as she continues to focus on her task of removing all of the weeds.
"What are you doing here!?" her grandfather hisses.
Jin briefly looks up at him. "What does it look like I'm doing? I'm weeding the tomato patch."
Her grandfather stomps his foot and glares at her. "You are supposed to be in the teashop protecting Mushi and his nephew!"
"Can't make it. I have to go to Cheng's place in a few minutes." She gives him a small, kernel of a smile. "I still have to work on convincing him to convince his dad to sponsor a new teashop for Mushi."
"Oh. Good." Her grandfather relaxes. "I guess you can afford to slack off for a day. Oh, by the way, I need you to give something to Mushi for me when you go back tomorrow—''
Jin stops hacking at the weeds and looks up at him. She loudly exhales and says, "Look, can you find someone else to do it?"
"What are you yammering about!? Why would I do that when I have you!?" he demands.
"Because I'm not going there tomorrow. In fact, I'm never going back there," Jin responds.
"What!? Why not!?" He narrows his eyes in suspicion. "Did something happen between you and Yee—''
"Lee—''
"I saw you go outside during the party. Did you two have a fight or something—''
"We didn't have a fight! We're not even friends!" Her voice raises octaves higher as she throws her hands up in the air. "Spirits, just drop it will you?"
Her grandfather folds his arms and stares at her. There is confusion in his eyes and she can tell that he's trying to figure something out. His lips tighten into a line and he doesn't say anything for a long time. Jin just continues to hack at the weeds.
Finally, in an annoyed tone, he says, "Look, I have no idea why you are acting like an immature twit, but this better not be about a boy. Your mother did same thing, worrying over some boy and look where it got her. And you know how I don't want you—''
"Spirits, Gramps! I'm just sick of drinking tea every day, okay?" Jin snaps. She sighs and tiredly says, "Look, I can't do everything. You want me to convince Quon to sponsor Mushi. You want me to protect Lee and Mushi. Does everything revolve around them? I mean, what are they anyway? Royalty?"
An amused smile appears on her grandfather's face. "You'd be surprised."
"I just don't want to go, okay?" She looks at him in the eyes and gives him a firm, steely gaze. "And that's that. Deal with it."
Her grandfather glares at her and his brows furrow in contemplation. Finally, he says, "Fine."
With a dramatic billow of his robes, he stomps away, loudly muttering, "Great! Now I'll have to get Huang's son but that idiot is a complete dolt…or maybe Shih's daughter is available…"
Jin looks at her grandfather's retreating figure before re-focusing her attention back to the weeds.
The day continues on quickly. She finishes weeding the tomato patch. She waters all of the flower beds and helps Lady Fai load all of the fertilizer she ordered into her carriage. She picks her little brother up from earthbending school before going to Cheng's house. She tries (and fails) to convince his dad to enter into the tea business.
Eventually, Jin comes home. After eating a quick dinner, she takes a bath, checks her brother's homework, tells him a story and tucks him in bed, says goodnight to her grandfather and goes to sleep.
She doesn't go back to the teashop at all.
The shop is in a lull today. Pao falls asleep by the counter, his head lolling against his shoulders, his mouth wide open and a fine dribble of saliva slowly trickling from his lips. Iroh and Zuko are in the back room; Zuko is busily washing all the teacups and pots while Iroh is restocking all the tea leaves.
Every once in a while Zuko would pause from his washing to go outside and peer at the tables. He would come back, every time, with a disappointed look on his face.
"Waiting for someone, nephew?" Iroh genially says as Zuko returns to the back room for the hundredth time, his face screwed in an upset and despondent expression.
"No," Zuko snaps as he stomps towards the sink, forcefully retrieves a newly cleaned teacup and grabs a rag. His hand is gripping the teacup too tightly and his other hand is wiping it in a forceful, livid fashion.
Iroh continues restocking the jar of rosehips as Zuko cleans all of the cups and pots. The two of them don't say anything for the longest of time.
It is his uncle who speaks first.
"Did something happen between you and Jin?" Iroh gently asks. His voice isn't prying and there is not a hint of his usual humor in his eyes. He sounds concerned and his face is serious as he looks at his nephew.
Zuko stiffens.
Jin hasn't come back for three days now. Why should he be the one to make the first move? She lied to him about living in the Upper Ring and she told him a lot of nasty things as well. And hypothetically, if he does want to make the first move, what should he say anyway? If he apologizes, it will be an admission that he was, in fact, really jealous (and he most certainly wasn't.) If he acts as if the argument never happened then it will only make things all the more awkward. Not going back and not being friends is the easier option.
Zuko slams the teacup against the table, nearly breaking it. His fingers clench and his eyes flash with remorse. He says in a tight voice, "Mind your own business."
He steps outside again before his uncle can say anything else.
Jin sits on the bench outside her brother's eartbending school as she waits for him to come out. Picking her brother up from school is something that rarely happens because she is so busy with her job and the University. But during Spring break, she never misses a chance to come and walk with him home. On their way to the house, Jin usually buys him an ice cream cone and they spend a great deal of time window shopping in the bazaars before getting home.
"Jin!"
She nearly staggers backwards as her little brother springs forward and envelops her in a warm hug.
"Hey," Jin says as she ruffles his hair. Dirt is streaked across his shirt and there is a bruise on his cheek. She frowns at him. "What happened?"
"I got into a fight with Pin! He was being a jerk. He called grandpa a stupid, old loser when my team won again in earth soccer. So, I told him, 'My grandpa's a war hero so don't you talk about him that way.' And then, he laughed at me so I started earthbending and then boom…pow…wham…and he was history. The headmaster called me up but I just got off on a warning."
He flashes her a triumphant smile which quickly forms into a frown when he catches his sister's distracted expression. "Hey, what's wrong with you?"
"Huh?"
"You've been acting weird lately."
"What do you mean?"
"You've been kinda sad these past few days."
"What? What are you talking about?"
"Like just now, I can tell that you aren't really paying attention."
"I'm paying attention."
"No, you're not. What were me and Pin fighting about?"
"Oh…er…um…he shoved you and—''
"Nu-uh! That isn't it! You weren't listening!" He pokes her on the arm. "What's up with you? What's bothering you?"
"Nothing's bothering me."
"You're lying. You're doing that twitchy thing with your nose." Jin glares at him and he flashes her a toothy, innocent smile. He gives her a sly look and says in a sing-song voice, "Did you and your boyfriend break up? Is that why you're so sad?"
"What? I don't have a boyfriend," Jin denies, her cheeks coloring.
Ro ignores her. "Yes, you do. The tea server guy."
He taps his chin and says in mock contemplation, "What's his name again? Yee? Jee? Oh….right…Lee!"
Jin's face turns redder. She scowls at him and attempts to swat him on the arm. He ducks to avoid her hand and runs off, gleefully laughing, "Ooohh…Jin and Lee, kissing on a tree…."
"Ro! Come back here!" Jin screeches as she attempts to catch him. Her brother continues running away, his laugh growing louder when he catches Jin resting by a tree, out of breath.
Jin hates it whenever her brother outruns her.
She hates it even more when he's right.
"Where are you going, uncle?" Zuko asks when he sees his uncle removing his apron. The shop is experiencing a particularly slow day and Zuko is bored out of his mind with nothing to do. There are no customers to be served and he has already finished clearing away the spills and washing the used cups and pots.
Usually, during slow days, he spends his time having much longer conversations with Jin. Now, he is sitting by the counter, drawing circle patterns on the wood while Pao sits next to him, eating a sandwich.
"Getting some leaves for the Jasmine tea. We ran out so I'm planning to brew some more for Jin," Iroh says. Jin never came back, not once, not since that night. But Pao and his uncle still act as if Jin is going to come, as if they haven't lost one of their favorite regulars.
Zuko exhales loudly and looks up to give his uncle a disapproving look. Iroh raises a brow at him and says, "What?"
"You shouldn't even bother," Zuko waspishly says.
"Um—''
"She's is never coming back, okay Uncle?!" The words are laced with regret when they tumble from his mouth.
"Oh."
"She hasn't been back for nearly a week," Zuko grumbles as he looks down and continues drawing circle patterns on the countertop. "Preparing more Jasmine tea than necessary is useless. She's the only one who drinks it…"
He trails off.
Iroh sagely smiles and puts his apron back on. "It's good then because now I don't have to make the extra effort of walking to the market."
"Yeah," Zuko mutters without looking up. His uncle sits next to him and starts whistling an unrecognizable tune. An awkward wave of silence suddenly passes through the room.
"Did you and Jin break up?" Pao suddenly says.
"What?!" Zuko nearly stumbles over as he looks up.
Pao nonchalantly shrugs and says, "She hasn't come back in a long time. Did you two have a fight or something?"
"We didn't have a fight. And we didn't break up. We aren't even friends," Zuko growls as he sends Pao a murderous look.
"I wish you two would work it out already. I'd hate to lose her as customer," Pao continues, completely oblivious of Zuko's wrath. "I wouldn't be surprised if she was the one who broke up with you."
"She didn't break up with me," Zuko says through gritted teeth. Iroh places a hand on Zuko's shoulder and attempts to calm him down.
"Sure, she didn't," Pao disbelievingly says. He takes a bite out of his sandwich and says, "If you want to talk about it, then I don't mind. I'm all ears. You must be really upset about losing your girlfriend."
"She is not my girlfriend!" Zuko explodes before stomping off to the back room.
The library is quiet and Jin struggles to stay awake as she grasps the scroll in her hands. The words blur together and she finds herself reading the same sentence for the past five minutes. She doesn't know why she feels so distracted, even more so than she usually is when she reads or studies boring scrolls, and it frustrates her.
"Um…Jin."
Jin jumps, startled. She turns to the side and sees Cheng.
Cheng is the son of Quon but he isn't half as obnoxious or creepy as him. When she was in secondary school, he always made it a point to sit next to her. Her grandfather says that he thinks that Cheng likes her, but she can't be too sure because he really hasn't done anything to support her grandfather's assumption.
"Hi." Jin smiles. She has forgotten that he is sitting next to her, diligently poring over a book for his paper. Jin is supposed to be helping him with his research about organic underwater plant forms but she hasn't really contributed much. She just mostly spent her time with him talking about the tea industry and subtly (or not so subtly) dropping hints that it would be a good business venture.
She doesn't even want to be here. She likes the library well enough but it's always too hot and the air always smells too musty. She'd rather be back in the greenhouse or at the teashop. But she needs to convince Cheng so he can convince his father to sponsor Mushi.
He looks nervous and he starts drumming his fingers against the table.
"How's the reading?" He tries to make it sound casual but it comes off as a nervous splutter.
"Almost done. It's pretty boring," Jin says. She hasn't understood a single word actually.
"Yes, the author of that book is rather dull. He uses far too many words for my liking," he says in agreement. He keeps looking at everywhere but her.
"How about you?"
"I just finished actually."
"Oh." Jin is guilty because she is still halfway through her first book and Cheng has already finished his third. "So, can we use anything in there for your paper?"
"Yes, there are quite a few things that I could use." He sits up a bit straighter and continues on in a more confident voice, "I finished it quickly enough."
"That's good," Jin says as she flashes him a wide smile.
"Yeah. It is." He pauses. "So, um…."
Cheng clears his throat and says, "Do you wanna maybe hang out together sometime?"
"Hang out?" Jin says, a little confused.
"You know. Hang out. We can go check out the bazaars or watch a play or have dinner together. You know, whatever you want. My treat," he says as he finally meets her eyes.
"Oh," Jin says in realization.
He does like her.
Jin stares at him. Cheng is handsome, in a boyish kind of way, and he always has a gentle smile on his face. He is kind and sweet, if not a little too talkative, from the numerous conversations they have had together. He always talks about his mother, something that immediately endears him to her. He is well-spoken and very polite, just a little shy.
He is cute and he seems like someone who would be fun to go out on a date with. But there is something about him that seems lacking, although she can't quite point it out.
Jin avoids his gaze and fiddles with the hem of her sleeve. "I don't know…I mean I'm really busy—''
"We can get tea together. You really like tea, don't you?" he says in desperation.
She suddenly thinks of Lee and the way his hands would grip the teacup too tightly.
She is thinking of saying yes to him but when she opens her mouth, what she says is, "Maybe some other time. I don't think I have the free time. I'll take a rain check."
"Oh. Okay." He looks down in disappointment for a moment. Then he brightens up again and gives her a lopsided smile. "I'll hold you to that rain check. Some other time, then."
He gives her a hopeful look.
Jin nervously shifts in her place as she lies, "Some other time."
He feels restless.
Zuko stares up at the ceiling and broods as he attempts to fall asleep. The teashop had a busy day today. She still hadn't come back. Not that he cared. He was way too busy to care. He had spent the whole day racing back and forth in the shop, collecting money and making sure that everyone got the tea they wanted. His uncle had prepared a pot of Jasmine tea that was left unfinished and Pao incessantly pestered him for details about his and Jin's completely non-existent break-up.
The least she could've done was come back, at least once, to tell them that she won't be going to the teashop anymore. She can't just leave his uncle and Pao (and him) like this without any explanation, without any closure. Yeah, he knew that she was probably angry and hurt over a couple of things he said to her that night but she should've given him—no, not him, Pao and his uncle—a proper goodbye.
He can't believe her.
She is so inconsiderate.
He starts wondering if Jin misses him. He imagines her lying in her bed, staring at the ceiling, thinking about him. What could she be doing right now? Maybe she is training. Maybe she is hanging out with her little brother. Maybe she is studying. Maybe she is going over books for Cheng's research paper. The research paper which she is helping him with. In his room. Alone.
He scowls and sits up. This is impossible. He can't sleep. And it's all her fault.
He stands up and starts pacing back and forth. He doesn't know why he feels so annoyed and frustrated.
He suddenly, irrationally has the urge to go outside, despite it being curfew, to go to her house and to apologize. Even though he despises apologizing; he is going to anyway, because he misses her. He misses talking to her. He misses walking around the Lower Ring with her and watching street theatre plays. He misses serving Jasmine tea to her. He misses her disarming smile and her bright green eyes, always wide and lively with delight.
He misses her being the only thing in this stupid city that makes him happy.
He takes a step towards the door, but stops just as his hands touch the doorknob. His whole existence here in Ba Sing Se is a lie. Being friends with Jin will only be allowing the lie to flourish.
Why is here?
What is he doing?
He asks himself for the thousandth time. He doesn't really have an answer but what he does have is a decision. He can't do it. He can't apologize and patch things up with her. If he does, he is sure that he will inevitably hurt her (more than he already has).
(A part of him is aware that he's only making up excuses but an even bigger part of him decides that he really doesn't care.)
Sweat drips off Jin's face as she does the movements of the drill. Today's training session is focused on upper body strength. The drill is easy enough, but it is still strenuous and exacting and the training session is lasting an hour longer than usual. Her grandfather watches her as she goes through the movements again and again.
"Stop," her grandfather loudly says.
Jin abruptly stops, her hands hanging in mid-air and her feet stretched into a rigid stance. She looks up to meet her grandfather's eyes. He is standing in front of her, his arms folded and his gaze, critical and precise.
"What was that?" he demands.
"Um…earthbending?"
"Are you kidding me!?" Jin winces at the harsh tone of his voice. "That was the most atrocious display of earthbending I have ever been subjected to!"
"I'm sorry," she sincerely says. His eyes glare at her with a probing glance.
"What is wrong with you!? You aren't focused. You're distracted."
Jin looks down as he continues to frown at her.
"You've lost control over your breathing again," he snaps.
"Yeah, I figured," she wheezes as she tries to force as much air as she can into her lungs.
"You need to work on your stamina and endurance," he sternly tells her as he moves closer towards her. "And your technique has a long way to go. At times, your form is also a little sloppy."
Jin seriously nods her head and tries to not be too upset over the criticisms. She understands that if she wants to succeed in becoming proficient in earthbending, she must constantly practice and polish the areas that she needs working on. And she can only do that, if she pays attention to her grandfather's comments, even if they really hurt most of the time.
Her grandfather used to be a general and he's one of the greatest earthbenders in the city so he must know what he's talking about when he's training her. He used to be the head of the Council of Five and he led the Earth Kingdom forces against the Fire Nation when they tried to conquer Ba Sing Se, a few years back. He doesn't like talking about the Siege though. Jin doesn't really understand why. Yes, she knows that he almost lost to the Dragon of the West but in the end, he still won. She figures that it may be because he got into a huge fight with Long Feng. He's still sore over getting fired from the Council of Five and being replaced with the much younger General How.
"You're a girl," he says shortly.
Jin doesn't know how to respond without sounding disrespectful. So she says, "Oh."
"You aren't as muscular as men," he says, matter-of-factly. "You aren't as strong."
He grabs her elbow and lightly taps it, as if to prove a point. "Put more emphasis on your elbows. And knees, when we are focusing on lower body strength. You can put more power and strength behind them and use them to your advantage."
Jin nods and holds her hand up to her forehead in mock salute, unable to keep her serious demeanor. "Yes, sir."
Her grandfather glares at her and frowns. "Be serious! You think learning how to defend yourself is a joke?"
"No, of course not!"
"Pah!" he growls disbelievingly. He gestures at her stomach. "Your centre is also off and therefore, your root can easily be disrupted. Never forget to keep tension and pressure here."
He furrows his brows and looks at the distance in contemplation. Finally, he looks at her and says, "I want you to stay in this position for the next hour."
He spreads his feet apart and shows her the position.
"What!? Are you serious!?" Jin says, her eyes widening in surprise.
"Your form is too fluid. You need to be rigid and rooted. And you are distracted." He gives an exasperated sigh. "What is wrong with you!? Focus. When you're in the middle of a fight, your enemy won't be as gracious as me to point out all your mistakes!"
"Gramps…" Jin tiredly sighs as she wipes the sweat from her brows. "What am I going to need this for anyway? We're in Ba Sing Se. The most dangerous thing I will ever face is you at six in the morning."
He glares at her and sternly says, "Do not take earthbending training lightly. Someday you will need it."
"For what? What are you talking—''
"Silly girl, stop talking so much! Just go on and do as I say!" he irately snaps. He then looks at her flushed face and tired expression. Sighing, he gruffly says, "Fine. You can take a break. Take some ginger tea. It will soothe your muscles."
"Yes, gramps," Jin says as she forces a smile out.
She momentarily feels a slight spasm of sadness when she is reminded of Lee.
Zuko storms out of the teashop as soon as he finishes slamming his tray against the table. His shift did not start out well. One of the guys from Dr. Shu's party came by with his other rich friends and offered his uncle a chance at a new life in the Upper Ring, running his very own teashop. It's a great opportunity and all but the first thing he thought about when he heard the news was that avoiding Jin will be a lot harder if they live in the same Ring.
He shakes his head and scowls. Why is he even thinking about this? Why does he even care?
He shouldn't.
Because caring implies that he actually wants to see her again (and he really doesn't). Caring implies that he wants to patch things up with her (and he really doesn't). Caring implies that he wants to apologize (and he really doesn't). Caring implies that he actually cares about her (and he really doesn't).
The sound of fluttering paper interrupts his line of thought. He looks up and sees a shower of papers falling down on everything—the heads of passers-by, the streets, the rooftops. He reaches out and grabs one.
His eyes widen as everything comes into focus.
His life, which has become a jumbled mess, is now clear again—all the pieces are falling back into place. The Avatar has lost his bison. The Avatar is here, in Ba Sing Se. First, he will have to find the bison and capture it. And from there, he can figure something out.
He fists the paper in his hands as he starts scaling a nearby building. Home, which had been so far away before, now seems just a breath away. His honour, his throne, his life; they are within reach once again.
He lifts his face to the sky, his eyes searching for a glimpse of the Avatar, for a glimpse of his ticket back home.
