Chapter Eight: All That You Can't Leave Behind
The shooters were dead and Bobby's car was totaled. I didn't move from my place behind the computer monitor, knowing that Angel, Jack, and Bobby would assume we were all asleep. When the house once again fell silent I sat back in my seat. The people who had hit me and shot Ma was dead but that didn't make me feel any better. Ma was still dead and the people that ordered the hit was still alive.
It was only around four in the morning but I couldn't stay still, I was far too agitated to do anything but move around. I could feel exhaustion being to creep up on me, so I snuck into my room to take another pill or two.
"What are you doing?" Ben snapped.
I thought he had been sleeping but his hand was wrapped tightly around my wrist as hazel eyes narrowed angrily.
"Get off me," I growled, ripping my wrist from his hand. "And what the hell do you think I'm doing?"
"Are those the tampons you got?" Ben demanded, his lip curling in disgust.
"I need them," I snarled. "I thought you understand."
"Don't play that victim card on me," Ben hissed. "This doesn't get you sympathy. You're a fucking addict, Lux. And you need to sleep."
"I don't need anything," I snapped.
"Then you won't be needing these anymore, huh?" Ben sneered grabbing the bottle out of my hand and moving to throw them out of the open window.
"Ben, don't," I warned.
"Why?" Ben demanded rounding on me, sending me sprawling in the face of his anger. "I thought you said you don't need anything."
"I don't want to sleep," I whispered. "Just give them back."
"No!" Ben yelled. "You don't need these! Don't you get it, Lux? You'll kill yourself."
"I won't," I retorted.
"Jesus Christ, open your eyes," Ben barked. "I can see your fuckin ribs. And what did you do to get these? Lie? Steal?"
"Shut up, Ben," I snapped. "You don't understand."
"I don't want to fucking understand!" Ben snarled, shoving me into one of the walls. "I'm done turning the other cheek, hoping that you'll show me why people think you're the smart one."
"Fuck you," I growled. "And give 'em back!"
"No!" Ben snarled.
Before I could move, Ben had spun on his heel and threw the bottle out of the open window.
"I'll kill ya, you son of a bitch!" I seethed.
I ran at him, moving to tackle him when Ben grabbed hold of my arms using my momentum to toss me to the ground. I kicked his legs out from under him as I fought to get my breath back. When I got a lungful of air the fight began in earnest, quickly turning this into one of the most violent that Ben and I had ever had. Our door was thrown open and we were pulled from one another seconds later. Jack was struggling to hold me back while Bobby was having trouble immobilizing Ben.
"What the fuck are you two doing?" Bobby demanded, finally getting a good enough hold on Ben and shaking him roughly. "It's four thirty in the fuckin morning."
"Yeah, Lux, why don't you tell Bobby," Ben grinned his eyes shifting from Bobby's to mine. "I'm sure he'll be very interested."
"Shut the fuck up, Benny boy," I warned, fighting Jack's hold.
"What the hell is going on?" Bobby growled.
"Ask the little pill popper," Ben muttered
"Whoa," Bobby snapped. "The hell do you mean pill popper?"
"Lux has been taking Adderall," Ben said. "You don't believe me look out the window. She also hasn't slept since her nightmare a couple nights ago."
"Ben," Bobby growled. "Jack. Get outta here."
"Bobby," Jack whispered.
"I said go, Jackie," Bobby growled.
I glared at Ben, who smirked at me before going down stairs. Jack followed only a moment after looking a bit more reluctance.
"You're popping pills," Bobby growled, shutting the door to eye me angrily. "Are you kidding me?"
"No, Bobby," I mumbled.
"Look at me, little girl," Bobby ordered lifting my chin with his forefinger, forcing me to look into furious hazel eyes. "What the fuck were you thinking?"
"I was thinking about not failing outta school," I growled. "I'm the first one attending. Ma was so proud…"
"Yeah, Dorothea, she'd be real proud to know that her daughter is abusing prescription meds to stay awake to do more work. I know I'm thrilled."
"You don't understand!" I muttered. "It isn't high school, Bobby. Things are different the pressure is worse. The workload is twice as much. I was in the top of my class at Cass Tech and without Adderall I was at the bottom. They'll kick me out."
"They're going to kick you out," Bobby retorted sharply. "Do you have any idea how much trouble you'd get into. It's dangerous, Lux. You haven't slept in a week?"
"I feel fine," I rolled my eyes.
My eyes widened as Bobby slapped my cheek. It wasn't anywhere near as hard as I've ever been hit. Hell, Bobby has slapped me a hell of a lot harder upside the head. Still I was shocked but Bobby didn't let my hesitation throw him.
"You are not fine," Bobby growled stepping closer to glare down at me. "You haven't been eating. You haven't been sleeping. All you've been doing is cleaning and avoiding the issue. Ma is dead, Lux. And you know what I'm glad she is because if she were alive you'd be breaking her fucking heart!"
"And you wouldn't be?" I retorted shoving him backwards. "You killed two people. Damn it, Bobby you solved violence with fucking violence. You know how much she always hated that. But you did it anyway. To make yourself feel better."
"Shut your mouth," Bobby warned. "You're sleep deprived and not thinking straight. We'll talk about this after you've slept."
"I'm thinking fine, Bobby," I growled
"Bullshit," Bobby retorted. "This isn't the girl I know. My little sister would never take drugs, just to do well in school."
"Jesus fucking Christ, Bobby, I'm not in fucking school," I snarled. "I don't give a shit about school anymore. I don't want to sleep and you wanna know why? Because every fucking time I close my eyes I see Ma die. Over and over. I see it when I'm awake and the nightmares are worse. It's tainting every memory I ever had. Maybe I belong at Meadow Brook."
"Don't say that," Bobby whispered, all the anger suddenly gone from his voice. Leaving only concern is his gaze. "You belong here with your family."
I averted my gaze only to have Bobby place my face in his hands as his face became stern. "You're going to get some sleep. When you wake up we'll talk about this more. It's five in the morning, we could all use some sleep."
"I'm not sleeping," I shook my head at Bobby's warning look I continued. "Please, don't make me sleep, Bobby. Please."
"Luxie, you need your rest," Bobby said, firmly. "You also need to eat. Sleep first."
"Bobby…"
"Do you remember when you first came to live here and you had nightmares?" Bobby asked. "Nothing in the world could get you out of them or calm you down. Until Ma realized that all we had to do was let you and Ben sleep together or let you sleep with her or me or any of the others. When she realized that the regularity of which you had nightmares decreased dramatically."
Without letting me say a word, he grabbed me by the wrist. He let me go when he reached my bed pushing the covers back. He got in shuffling until his back was against the wall, leaving plenty of room for me. With an expectant look, I sighed climbing under the covers myself. Despite my protests I fell asleep rather quickly. Then again not wanting to sleep and having to sleep were two very different things.
I was still very much asleep when the house began to wake up. I didn't stay that way when a door was slammed shut with a sharp warning of, "Police in the house!" After being deprived of sleep for so long, I realized how much I needed it. The few hours I got was almost teasing, but still hearing that the police had come was enough to have me throwing on my sweatshirt and walking down the stairs just in time to see Angel and Fowler square off. I squeezed my way between Jack and Sofi in the doorway.
"Hey, stop!" Green snapped shoving Fowler back. "Look, Bobby, if you got something, you give it to me and if it's vital we'll run with this. But don't try and take on Detroit by your damn self. You keep knocking on the devil's door long enough, and sooner or later, somebody's gonna answer you."
"You!" Fowler growled as he walked up to me. "You still have to give me your statement."
"I'll give you a statement," I sneered. "Try this one: my mother's fucking dead and you're too fuckin' incompetent to find the people who murdered her. How's that for a statement?"
"Another Mercer with a smart mouth," Fowler rolled his eyes. "I'm shocked. Evelyn certainly did a fine job raising you all."
"Fowler!" Green reproached.
"Don't fucking talk about our mother," I growled pushing by Sofi to get in Fowler's face. Something that was made rather difficult by the fact that I was significantly shorter.
"Lux," Green warned, grabbing Fowler and shoving him out of the door. "He doesn't know what the fuck he's talking about."
"He should transfer out of Detroit," I rolled my eyes. "There's people worse than us who would've shot him on the spot for disrespect like that. Cop or no cop."
"You should be sleeping," Bobby announced when Green and Fowler had left, leaving an uneasy tension in their wake.
"You shouldn't be wearin' my robe," I smirked.
Just like that the uneasy feeling lifted as we all shared a laugh at Bobby's expense. After we had finished laughing, Bobby had stood up and led me back upstairs. He leaned against the wall as I climbed under the covers, giving me further evidence that Bobby would do whatever he thought was needed for us. Murder, assault, watching us while slept, keeping the nightmares at bay.
When I woke up again, it was the middle of the afternoon. Bobby wasn't in the room but Ben was. Sitting on his bed, he was watching me. Yawning I scooted up on my bed before glancing over at Ben. Neither he nor I said a word as I got up and moved over to the closet, quickly changing clothes. It was only until that I moved to go out of the door that Ben spoke up.
"Bobby told us to wait up here," Ben announced.
"Why?" I questioned.
"He said that he and Jerry had some things to discuss."
"That we're not privy too?" I rolled my eyes.
It was obvious that no matter what, our brothers would be avenging our mother without our help. It was bullshit.
"No, no, no!" Jerry screamed. You don't know who you're fucking with?"
"What are you hidin', Jerry?" Bobby demanded.
We heard a crash and a curse before Jerry retorted in equal volume. "What? What the fuck is wrong with you?"
"If you had something to do with what happened…" Bobby growled. "I swear to God, Jerry, I'll kill you right here and now."
I didn't have to look backwards to know that Ben and I were once again thinking on the same wave-length as I slowly pushed open our door and stormed down the stairs, pausing long enough to grab the gun that Bobby had left on the top stair. Angel and Bobby were facing off against Jerry and Jack was sitting awkwardly on the couch. His spine was rigid as his teeth gnawed at his lip.
"No, Bobby, no!" Sofi gasped.
"Angel's gonna answer you some questions," Bobby continued as if Sofi hadn't spoken." And, brother, I shit you not, the time for lyin' is over."
"We know you're lying about your business," Angel stated. "And we know you got mixed up with some gangsters."
"Hold on, stay down!" Bobby ordered kicking Jerry back to the floor.
"Y'all think I had something to do with Mom getting killed?" Jerry snarled rising to his feet.
"You got a check for forty thousand dollars that you just so happened to forget to mention, from Mom's life insurance?" Bobby barked.
"She took out the policy for the girls," Jerry responded. "I ain't have nothin' to do with that. Come on."
"You made the payments!" Jack snapped.
"Good timing, Jerry," Bobby snarked. "Just when it seems like all is lost for you, Mom gets shot by some gangsters and now you hit the fuckin' lottery!"
"So, y'all trippin 'cause I made some insurance payments?" Jerry growled. "What? I paid all her bills! And where the fuck were y'all? How many years did I take care of her my goddamn self? Y'all were around doin' nothin'! And you're gonna tell me I killed her? Come on, man!"
Within that tirade Jerry had punched both Angel and Bobby, glaring angrily at all of us.
"So, why would you pay off a killer like Sweet?" Ben asked causing everyone to whirl around and stare at him in wonder. "What the fuck did he do for you?"
"How the fuck do you know about Sweet?" Bobby demanded at the same time Jerry huffed, "What did he do for me? He killed my fucking life! I put everything in that project. I bet it all tryin to make something of myself. Then Sweet's goons came in trying to take a piece."
"You paid him, Jerry," Jack spat. "You got into bed with him."
"No, no, I didn't pay them!" Jerry corrected. "That's how they fucking shut me down!"
"I thought the city shut you off."
"Douglas? Come on, man, this is Detroit! Sweet owns Douglas. He ain't nothing but a gangster in a suit! I don't pay him, and now he shuts my loans off. End of story, end of project."
"So what about the forty grand?" Ben asked.
"I just told you," Jerry retorted. "You wanna cross the bridge, you gotta pay the toll. I took the money. I was gonna pay the bribe until y'all fucked it up."
In the heat of the argument that no one had noticed that Jack had gotten up and answered the doorbell that had rang. I didn't notice until I felt the breeze of cold air quickly followed by Jack's shout of, "Son of a bitch! Piece of shit!"
"Jack!" I shouted, running after him. I noticed the snow that was in the doorway and Jack a few yards a head of me, chasing after someone in a hood.
I was closing the distance when the other kid suddenly turned revealing the hockey mask and pistol. Jack stopped short but it wasn't enough to keep him from getting shot in the shoulder.
"Jack!" I howled. "Bobby!"
I recoiled when the kid raised his head aiming the gun at me. I jumped in shock when a sudden gunshot blast echoed close to my ear. I turned around and saw Bobby on the porch, sawn-off shot gun in his grasp.
"Oh, god, Jackie, I whispered.
"Shit!" Bobby screamed. "Get down!"
I landed on Jack shielding him with my body as a van skidded around the corner. More masked men came pouring out of the van, bullets blazing with both Jack and I open and vulnerable. I screamed when a bullet pierced my shoulders and bullets riddled Jack's legs.
"Bobby!" Jack screamed, sobbing.
"Bobby!" I moaned.
"Hold on, you guys!" Bobby growled.
Bullets flew, low and close and loud as both Jack and I tried to hold on and minimize the targets on our back, knowing at any moment we could be shot fatally. Suddenly the bullets ceased, leaving a loud silence in its wake. I couldn't move, barely aware of Jack's own shallow breathing beside me.
"BOBBY!" I howled, when hands wrapped around my waist pulling me off the ground.
"Let's go!" Someone shouted. "We have what we came here for."
I caught a glimpse of the house riddled with gun shots, Jack laying in a puddle of his own blood before I was tossed in the back of the van. 'Move you little idiot,' I thought. My entire body ached and I knew that I had been shot at least twice but just sitting there wasn't helping.
"LUX!" Ben screamed.
That was like water in the face, hearing Ben's scream sent a jolt of adrenaline through my system as I scrambled in the van, elbowing one of the masked men as I grabbed the van doors with every intention of leaping out of the slow moving vehicle.
"BEN!" I yelled kicking one of the masked men in the stomach.
"Jesus Fuckin' Christ!" The driver yelled. "Shut the stupid bitch up already."
The last thing I saw was the butt of a shotgun rushing towards my face before my world exploded in pain and went dark.
Four Hours Later
"Look who's finally waking up," A deep, rumbling voice teased. "About goddamn time."
The amount of effort it took to open my eyes had me moaning in pain. My arms were twisted painfully behind my back, tied to the chair that I was sitting on. Any small moment was excruciating as I struggled not to move. The man who was standing directly in my line of sight obviously didn't respect that as his hand lunged out smacking me across the face.
"Lux Mercer, a pleasure, I'm sure." The man grinned.
"Victor Sweet?" I questioned.
"Ah, I see you've heard of me," Victor smirked.
"You murdered my mother," I growled.
"Now, let's mind our manners," Victor chided, helpfully smacking me again. "It's so hard to find good help these days. You weren't supposed to be harmed."
"What about my brother?" I demanded.
"We had to get you out of the house somehow," Victor shrugged.
"I swear to god, if he's hurt…"
"I know, you're not stupid enough to threaten me," Victor snarled.
"Bobby's going to kill you," I smiled. "They'll never be able to find your body."
I probably should've kept my mouth shut. But, one thing my brother's taught me was to never back down from anyone. If he was going to kill me, he would kill me regardless of what I said. And, I'd rather die with dignity that die a spineless brat.
"I'm not concerned about little Bobby Mercer," Victor sneered. "Your little family's about to wiped off the fucking map!"
"Or you are," I shrugged. "I think you're overcompensating. Still upset you were your Uncle's bitchboy for so long?"
"Evan, pistol!" Victor shouted, turning towards the man who was waiting in the back of the room.
Ben's Point of View
It was amazing how fast things could deteriorate. In less than forty-eight hours our house had been shot to shit, Jack may never walk again, and Lux had been taken god knows where. Waiting in St. Thomas was one of the most difficult thing I had done in a while. It felt like was twelve again, where I barely saw Lux, except for the few minutes down time where we were shuttled to different foster homes.
I hated not knowing where she was or if she was okay. Lux was a lot stronger than most people thought she was. The negative connotations of staying in a psychiatric hospital continued to weaken her reputation. Make people think she was weak, fragile. And to a point, maybe she was but Lux fought with all her strength even when all hope seemed lost.
Now though my concerns were split equally between Jack and Lux. The doctors weren't telling us much. Only that the bleeding had stopped but they wouldn't know the extent of the damages until he woke up…if he woke up. When the doctor had said if it took all three of us to restrain Bobby from beating the stupid health professional into a coma.
I didn't know what we were going to do. It was obvious that Sweet was out for blood, but we were going to let this stand. We had to find Lux and we were going to finish this before we all ended up dead.
"Bobby, can I talk to you for a minute?" I whispered. "Alone?"
Bobby looked up glancing over at Jerry and Angel before rising to his feet and following me over to the vending machine cluster.
"What's up, Benny boy?" Bobby asked.
"You need to catch me up on everything," I stated. "Keeping Lux and I out of the loop wasn't helping. You need us, Bobby. Jack is in the hospital and Lux is still in danger. I need to help."
"No," Bobby retorted. "Absolutely not."
"Bobby," I groaned. "Come on."
"Ben," Bobby warned.
I knew that Bobby's nerves were frayed to breaking, and it was not rise to continue to argue with him. But, this was ridiculous. No matter how pissed Bobby, Angel, and Jerry were they couldn't take on Sweet and their goons by themselves. I wasn't a baby, I could help. My mother had died too. It was my brother in that hospital room, and my twin sister who was missing. I wasn't on the outside of this anymore, I never really had been, and it was time that Bobby recognized that.
"Bobby, you need my help," I insisted. "She was my mother too. Jack might not wake up and I can't sit idly by and wait for Lux to turn up dead!"
"Don't talk like that," Bobby reproached. "Listen to me, I need to make sure you're safe. I'm keeping you out of this fight." I moved to protest but Bobby shot me a scathing look before continuing. "I need you to stay here. We can't leave Jack unprotected. They wanted to kill him and they might come back to finish the job."
"Damn it, Bobby," I frowned.
"Sweet's not livin' past tonight, Benny," Bobby stated. "I can promise ya that."
"Do you think she's still alive?" I whispered.
"Yeah," Bobby sighed. "If I were Sweet, I'd be using her as leverage. You wouldn't kill off the one thing that would keep you safe, would you?"
"No," I replied.
Even if Sweet was just keeping Lux alive for his own wellbeing, I didn't trust that she was okay. I didn't like this, I didn't like not knowing whether Jack would live or die or if Luxie was even alive. I rationalized that, as her twin, if she was dead I'd know on some level. But, I didn't feel anything that time where she almost killed herself. The truth was I didn't know what Sweet was capable of, our how compliant Lux would be to things. I remembered Victor being a hot head, even when he was just a messenger for his Uncle and knowing my sister as well as I did, she would find just the right buttons to push.
"Stay here, Benny," Bobby whispered dropping a hand on my shoulder. "We'll be back as soon as we can."
