Story Ideas
Hey, everyone. I know you're all expecting some stories to be updated sooner than later and I respect that, but I also have a ton of other ideas that my mind can't think straight. So, I thought you'd all like to see how my mind works, so I thought this would be a good way to show you. This will give previews of various ideas I've been having and, should one chapter get enough reviews-say 15 or so with all of them being more than just one sentence or statement and actualy try to at least ask something about the story-, then I'll start publishing it as an actual story here on FanFiction. So, enjoy.
Those of Different Sides
GammaTron: Hi, everybody! I hope you all love my new picture!
Caboose: Hooray! It is me.
GT: Yep! And because of this occasion, I have decided that if I get eight reviews (eight, of course, meaning that they are well made reviews with one question being the minimum about this story and there being no suggesting other story ideas) for this, then I'm publishing any story with a mention of Red VS Blue in it in this Story Ideas thing immediately with an extra chapter.
Caboose: *whispering loudly* He is doing this because he likes me the best.
GT: And all Flames, Flamers, and Trolls will answer directly to Sarge. Sarge?
Sarge: *cocks his shotgun* Simmons, get the Warthog ready! Grif, ready your body to be my meat shield!
Grif: *off-screen* I'll ready the Grif Shot.
GT: Now then, this has actually been in my noggin for quite some time now. Not involving RvB mind you since I only recently got into it as far back as around two weeks ago. But the idea was this…
Caboose: Are you going to make more of those kinds of stories? Because they sound complicated.
GT: I didn't even say it! *sighs when he notices Caboose wasn't really getting it* Of course they do, Caboose. But that's what a lot of FanFic Writers have to deal with; complex ideas that they can make work. Like the previous story on here?
Church: Yeah. That's really complex there. That Void Century stuff and how you're trying to make things seem equaled out in it. Plus, the fact that X follows the Three Laws, yet he isn't even programmed with them! Or that Roll doesn't even know that Dr. Light removed her own copy of the Three Laws Program!
GT: …Caboose, can you help Church please?
Caboose: Okay. *shoots Church in the back, dropping his robot body and leaving the ghost body* …Church got in the way of me helping Church.
Church: Caboose!
Caboose: *quickly* Tucker did it!
GT: Okay…While Caboose and I run away from the mad ghost, let's get this over with. Donut!
Donut: *walks in* You got it! Okay, everyone, here's the disclaimer! GammaTron does not own the Halo Series, Red VS Blue, or the ?-?-? Franchise. They are owned respectively by Bungie, Rooster Teeth, and ?-?-?. Speaking of ?-?-?, if anyone's seen their Nintendo 3DS lately, they'll see that they just added a ?-?-? Picture to the list of image puzzles~!
GT: *in the background* Oh shit! He's possessed RoboCop! Run for it, Caboose! We're not gonna win even if we have a Terminator on our side! I saw the Death Battle! I saw it! It ended badly for the robot!
Caboose: Oh no!
Church: =GET BACK HERE SO I CAN KILL YOU ASSHOLES!=
"So…" Michael J. Caboose began as he looked over to the only other figure in the flying vehicle, "Are you going to Blood Gulch, too?"
"Hm?" jade eyes looked up from their handheld device to look over at the twenty-year-old, "Of course. It's where I was assigned to Blue Base, after all."
"Oh, that is good," Michael nodded, a smile on his young face, "I'm Michael J. Caboose. But everyone calls me by my last name."
"Really? Doesn't anyone try to call you 'Mike' or 'Mikey?'" the owner of the eyes asked, a frown on their lips.
"Yeah…No. I tried, but everyone calls me 'Caboose,'" Caboose replied, "But I don't mind. It's grown on me in recent years. But you can call me 'Caboose' too, if you want."
"Well, it's a pleasure to meet you, Michael-san," the figure nodded towards him, "Can I call you 'Mikey' for short?"
"…You'd do that?" Caboose asked.
"Of course!" the figure replied with a grin, putting their handheld away, "You seem more like a 'Mikey' to me than a 'Caboose' anyway."
"Yay! I made a new friend on my first day!" Caboose cheered, "…Wait. I forgot something." He frowned for a few minutes before looking at the other figure in the vehicle aside from their driver, "Can you help me?"
"Maybe you want to know my name?"
"Oh, yeah! That's it!" Caboose nodded, "Sorry about that. I have autism and, well…"
"Don't be worried about that. I lived in an orphanage for the first ten years of my life. The other twelve were, well, elsewhere," the figure replied as she picked up her standard-issued helmet, "And my name is Roll. Just 'Roll.' No last name. It's nice to meet you, Mikey-chan."
"Right!" Caboose beamed.
"Hey!" the driver called as she looked over her shoulder at them, "Better hurry up and get your stuff ready! We're landing in Blood Gulch in a few minutes."
"Arigatou!" Roll thanked before pulling his long, flowing, sun-kissed blond locks up to put her helmet on, the orange visor glowing before turning green to indicate its activation, "Ready, Mikey-chan?"
"Uh-huh!" Caboose nodded before putting his helmet on, "Hey, how did you get your visor to be green?"
"Oh, I like tweaking with programming and armors," Roll shrugged before pressing something on near her armor's neck and then speaking in a deeper, masculine voice, "And with this voice modifier, I can mess with the heads of my superiors by making them think I'm a guy first."
"Oh, that is really neat," Caboose pointed out before Roll pressed the spot once more.
"Yeah," Roll replied in her normal voice, "Plus, it's a good distraction against the enemy. Lousy Reds and their Confederate ways…"
"Lousy Blues and their Confederate ways…"
"Yeah. What gives with them?" Dexter Grif asked.
"No idea," the figure snorted, his ruby-red armor reflecting a bit of light from the sun, as he stood between Richard "Dick" Simmons and Grif.
"…Hey."
"Yeah, Rich?" the ruby figure asked.
"You ever wonder why we're here?" Simmons asked.
"It's one of life's great mysteries isn't it? Why are we here?" Grif pondered as the two slowly turned to look at him, "I mean, are we the product of some cosmic coincidence, or is there really a God watching everything? You know, with a plan for us and stuff. I don't know, man, but it keeps me up at night."
"…Dude…That is deep," the ruby-wearing figure stated.
"…What?! I mean why are we out here, in this canyon?" Simmons demanded, "But I have to agree with Rock, that was deep."
"Oh. Uh… yeah."
"What was all that stuff about God?" Rock asked.
"Uh…hm? Nothing."
"You wanna talk about it?" Simmons asked.
"No," Grif replied quickly.
"You sure?" Rock asked.
"Yeah."
"Seriously though, why are we out here? As far as I can tell, it's just a box canyon in the middle of nowhere. No way in or out."
"Mm hmm," Grif and Rock nodded.
"The only reason that we set up a Red Base here, is because they have a Blue Base over there. And the only reason they have a Blue Base over there, is because we have a Red Base here."
"So basically, the only reason we both have a base is because the other made a base because they thought the other was making a base so they had to make a base to defend against that base that didn't exist but existed now and…" Rock began before crying out infrustration, "Dammit! This is worse than the time I was stuck between a rock and a hard place!"
(CUTSCENE)
"I…uh…How did this even happen?" Rock pondered, standing between the Rock and a building called 'The Hard Place.'
The Rock reeled back his fist.
"Not the face! Or the balls!"
(END CUTSCENE)
"…Uh…" Grif tried to not think about what just happened, "…Yeah." He turned back to Simmons, "Anyways, that's because we're fighting each other.
"No, no. But I mean, even if we were to pull out today, and if they would come take our base, they would have two bases in the middle of a box canyon," Simmons informed, twirling a finger in the air in false glee, "Whoopdee-fucking-doo."
"What's up with that anyway? I mean, I signed on to fight some aliens. Next thing I know, Master Chief blows up the whole Covenant armada and I'm stuck in the middle of nowhere, fighting a bunch of blue guys."
"I joined to avoid going on a blind date," Rock informed, "I have zero luck at those."
(CUTSCENE)
"I don't get it, Brian. It's past the time she set up," Rock slumped in his chair, a dog standing on his hind legs beside him.
"Look, just relax. She's probably just caught in traffic like we were," the dog informed.
It was around that time, a baby dressed as a woman entered. He looked over at where Rock was.
"Nnnnnno," the baby stated before walking out, not once noticed by anyone.
(END CUTSCENE)
"…The fuck?" Grif asked after a few minutes.
Nearby, two soldiers in blue were on a hidden ledge. One was kneeling down while the other was looking through the scope of a sniper rifle.
"What're they doing?" Lavernius Tucker asked.
Leonard L. Church slowly turned around to face Tucker, lowering his rifle.
"What?"
"I said, 'What are they doing now?'" Tucker asked.
"God damn, I'm getting so sick of answering that question!" Chruch snapped.
"You have the fucking rifle, I can't see shit. Don't start to bitch at me because I'm not gonna just sit up here and play with my di…"
Church held up a hand while cutting him off, "Okay, okay, look…they're just standing there and talking, okay? That's all they're doing. That's all they ever do, is just stand there and talk," his pointed at them while saying 'just stand there and talk,' "That's what they were doing last week, that's what they were doing when you asked me five minutes ago. So, five minutes from now, when you ask me, 'What are they doing?' my answer's gonna be, 'They're still just talking, and they're still just standing there!'"
Both proceeded to fall silent. Tensions had been…bad…with them since the death of their leader, Captain Butch Flowers. Mainly because Tucker was expecting him to order a shipment of sniper rifles, but because he died of a heart attack in his sleep, there was only just one! Slowly, they resumed their positions.
"What're they talking about?"
"…You know what?" Church looked over at Tucker, "I fucking hate you."
"Talk about a waste of resources. I mean, we should be out there finding new and intelligent forms of life to…you know, fight them."
"Yeah, no shit. That's why they should put us in charge," Simmons agreed with Grif.
"Really? You want to fight an advanced alien race that may be worse than the guys Master Chief wiped out?" Rock asked.
"Ladies, front and center on the double!"
"Fuck," Grif muttered.
"Yes, sir!" Simmons declared.
"Coming, Sarge!" Rock called down to a pure red-armored soldier before jumping down off the side, landing before him, "What do you need?"
"Wait fer th' others, Captain Griffin," Sarge informed before, a few minutes later, Grif and Simmons were running up, "Hurry up, ladies. This ain't no ice cream social."
"Ice cream social?" Simmons repeated as he and Grif shared looks.
"An Ice Cream Social? Do not remind me of that! The last time my family tried that was a disaster!" Rock groaned.
(CUTSCENE)
"Uh…Dad?" Rock questioned a fat man in a white, button shirt, glasses, brown shoes, and green pants.
"Quiet, Rock," the man informed, not once looking away from the melting bowl of ice cream, "Well? What is your name?" the cherry fell off and popped, "Oh! You popped your cherry! You sick bitch! Doing that in front of my family!"
A slender woman in a blue button shirt, light-brown slacks, and orange hair facepalmed, "This is why we can't have ice cream socials. He takes them so literally."
"Yeah, Mom," Rock nodded with the dog, a baby in red overalls and a yellow shirt, a girl in a pink hat, shirt, and blue jeans, and a tubby blond in a hat, blue shirt, and black pants, "Yeah."
(END CUTSCENE)
"Rock, how many times do I have to tell you to not do that?" Sarge growled.
"Hey! It's not my fault!" Rock held his hands up, "They just happen!"
"Fine. Now stop the pillow talk, you three. Anyone want to guess why I gathered you here today?"
"Uh, is it because the war's over and you're sending us home?" Grif guessed.
"That's exactly it, Private. War's over. We won," Sarge replied, his voice dripping with sarcasm, "Turns out you're the big hero and we're gonna hold a parade in your honor. I get to drive the float, and Simmons and Rock here ARE IN CHARGE OF CONFETTI!"
"I'm no stranger to sarcasm, sir."
"Goddamn it, Private! Shut your mouth or else I'll have Simmons slit your throat while you're asleep! While Rock shoves your asshole filled with explosives and then sets them all of!" Sarge declared.
"Oh I'd do it, too."
"I know you would, Simmons. Good man," Sarge nodded.
"Not me," Rock informed.
"Well, thank you, Rock," Grif nodded.
"Damn you, Rock," Sarge grumbled in annoyance, "Couple of things today, ladies. Command has seen fit to increase our ranks here at Blood Gulch Outpost Number One."
"Crap. We're getting a rookie," Grif cursed.
"Whoo! New guy!" Rock cheered.
"That's right, dead men. Our new recruit will be here within the week, but today we received the first part of our shipment from Command," Sarge informed.
Grif and Simmons exchanged looks again. Rock grinned, knowing just what was being sent since he was the guy in charge of communications. Sarge turned towards a hill behind them.
"Lopez, bring up the vehicle," Sarge ordered.
A large, armor-plated, jeep-like vehicle came over the rise with a soldier in bronze armor in the driver seat. Lopez stopped the vehicle before the team and Rock got a better look at it. It didn't have any doors, but it sported a powerful turret on the top that made it just a three-seater with a pair of hooks near the front.
"Shotgun!" Simmons declared.
"Shotgu-Fuck," Grif cursed.
"Shotgun's lap," Rock smirked.
"Fuck!" Simmons cursed before Rock and Grif fived each other.
"May I introduce our new, light reconnaissance vehicle," Sarge informed as Lopez began to move his hands in a flashy manner to the vehicle, "It has four inch armor plating, mag bumper suspension, a mounted machine gunner position, and total seating for three. Gentlemen, this is the M12 LRV!" he looked at the awed faces they all had before adding in a jovial tone, "I like to call it the Warthog."
"…Why Warthog, sir?" Simmons asked.
"Because M12 LRV is too hard to say in conversation, son."
"I know, but why Warthog? I mean, it doesn't really look like a pig," Grif pointed out.
"…Say that again," Sarge ordered slowly after a moment's pause.
"I think it looks more like a puma."
"What in Sam Hell is a puma?"
"Uh, you mean like the shoe company?"
"No, like a puma. It's a big cat, like a lion," Grif informed.
"You're making that up," Sarge stated.
"I'm telling you, it's a real animal!" Grif argued.
"My dad got attacked by a puma once," Rock added, "But the puma came to the hospital later, apologized, and gave him flowers and paid for the medical bills!"
"Simmons, I want you to poison Grif's next meal. And put laxatives into Rock's."
"Yes, sir!"
Sarge began pointing at the front of the Warthog, "Look, see these two tow hooks? They look like tusks, and what kind of animal has tusks?"
"A walrus," Grif and Rock stated in unison.
"Didn't I just tell you to stop making up animals?!" Sarge demanded, not noticing the two Blues were spying on them still.
"What is that thing?" Tucker asked before Church lowered the rifle.
"I don't know, man. Looks like uh…looks like they've got some sorta car down there. We'd better get back to base and report it."
"A car? How come they get a car?!" Tucker was taken back.
"What are you complaining about, man? We're about to get a tank in the very next drop with a new Lieutenant and rookie," Church informed.
"You can't pick up chicks in a tank."
"Oh, you know what? You could bitch about anything couldn't you? We're going to get a tank, and you're worried about chicks. What chicks are we gonna pick up, man? And secondly, how are you gonna pick up chicks in a car that looks like that?"
Tucker sighed, "What kind of car is it?"
Church went back to looking through the scope of the sniper rifle, "I dunno, I've never seen a car like that before. It looks like a…uh…like a big cat of some kind."
"…What, like a puma?"
"Yeah, man, there you go," Church agreed.
"So unless anybody has anymore mythical creatures to suggest as a name for the new vehicle, we're going to stick with the Warthog. How about it, Grif? Rock?"
"No, sir. No more suggestions."
"But I'm serious! Dad got attacked by a puma all because of 'Who's on First?,' Sarge!" Rock argued.
"Are you sure? How 'bout Bigfoot?" Sarge ignored Rock.
"It's okay."
"Unicorn?"
"No really. Uh, I'm cool," Grif informed.
"Sasquatch?"
"Leprechaun?"
"Dammit, Simmons!" Rock groaned.
"Hey, he doesn't need any help, man," Grif agreed.
"Phoenix?" Sarge offered.
"I like that one," Rock grinned.
"Christ," Grif sighed.
"Hey Simmons, what's the name of that Mexican lizard? Eats all the goats."
"Uh, that would be the chupacabra, sir."
"Hey Grif, Rock, Chupathingy! How about that? I like it. Gotta ring to it."
"No thanks," Rock replied.
"Seems we're coming up on our drop point," Roll noted as she put her helmet back on and turned on the voice modifier, "Ready, Mikey-kun?"
"Ready!" Caboose saluted.
"…Your helmet."
"Oh! Yeah!" Caboose blinked twice before putting his helmet on, "I'm ready now, Big Sis!"
"Call me 'Rhodes' until I tell you otherwise. Okay?" Roll asked.
"Okay. …Is Rhodes your first name?"
"Last name, actually."
"Okay!" Caboose beamed before the landing bay doors opened while the pilot proceeded to get into something behind them.
"Let's move on out, Mikey-kun."
With that, the two ran out into the light. Adjusting to it, the two began to approach a circular base that war primarily metal with blue detailing. Behind them, the pilot drove out in a large, four-tread tank with a 360 revolving turret. Looking around, Roll spotted the only two Blues there.
"Hey!" Roll barked, earning the attention of the two, "Are you two the soldiers that were under my good buddy Butch Flowers?"
"Y-Yeah. He died of a heart attack in his sleep. I-I'm Church and h-he's Tu-Tucker," Church replied, gulping nervously, 'Holy shit. This guy's intimidating.'
"And where is his grave?" Roll demanded.
"Right there!" Tucker replied quickly as he pointed at a pair of long sticks put into an 'X' nearby, a bed of flowers before it in a rectangle.
"…" Roll walked over to the 'grave' and knelt down, "You always said you wanted to be buried underneath a bed of flowers…I'm…I'm not sure what to feel about this. Am I glad you got your wish? Should I be pissed that you didn't die in battle, but of a heart attack in your sleep? Well…Whatever I feel about this, it doesn't matter. Carry on my wayward friend. There will be peace since you are done. Lay your weary head to rest. Don't you cry no more. I'll stay with your men and protect them with my life."
With that, Roll got up and faced the three soldiers, the pilot having already left. Unaware to them, Rock was looking through a sniper rifle of a ridge nearby. Lowering his sniper rifle, he gulped before running back to base. At said base, Simmons and Grif were on the top once more, A soldier in red armor walking up the ramp behind them.
"Hey, that's not exactly what happened," Simmons pointed out.
"Yes, it is. You said "I'm not going to the Vegas Quadrant," and then the next thing I know you're in an escape pod headed for…" Grif began.
"Excuse me, uh, sirs."
"…Sirs?" Grif repeated before the two turned to the red soldier, "Ah crap."
"I was told to report to Blood Gulch Outpost Number One and speak to whoever's in charge," the new soldier informed.
"Sorry man, Sarge is at Command getting orders. Ain't nobody in charge today," Grif informed.
"Actually, Private, he left me in charge while he's gone," Simmons corrected.
"You are such a kiss-ass."
"Also, he told me if I had any trouble from you I should…" Simmons began before he cleared his throat and then poorly imitated Sarge, "'Git in th' Warthog, and crush yer head like a tomato-can.'"
"That's the worst impression I've ever heard," Grif deadpanned.
"Okay rookie, what's your story?" Simmons ignored Grif.
"Private Donut reporting for duty, sir. I'm ready to fight some aliens."
'…Donut?' the duo thought with sweatdrops.
"…Couple things here, rookie. First off, Private Donut? I think somebody needs a new nickname. Secondly, what's with the armor color?" Grif demanded.
"This is the standard issue red," Donut replied.
"Yeah, I know. Listen. Only two kinds of people wear standard issue armor: officers and recruits. And since you're not threatening to gut me like a fish, you're probably not an officer."
"Well, he's wearing red armor," Donut informed as he pointed at Simmons.
"No, my armor is maroon. Your armor is red," Simmons corrected.
"Well, how do I get a different color armor?" Donut asked.
"Guys! Guys! Alert! Warning! H is for Hurry, E is for Emergency, L is for Love, and P is for Please!" Rock's screamed echoed as he ran towards them.
"I bet the Blues don't have to put up with this kind of crap," Grif muttered.
"So I say to the guy, 'how're you gonna get the tank down to the planet?' And he goes, 'I'll just put it on the ship,' and I go, 'if you've got a ship that can carry a tank, why not just put guns on the ship and use it instead?'" Caboose explained to Tucker and Church.
"Hey, kid."
"Yeah?" Caboose looked over at Tucker.
"You're ruining the moment. Shut up."
"Oh. Okay. You got it man!" Caboose replied.
"Private Tucker!" Tucker yelped as he turned to look at the glaring Lieutenant that had just arrived to base, "Did I just hear you bad-mouth a fellow cadet?"
"U-Uh…" Tucker gulped.
"You know what? I could blow up the whole god damn world with this thing," Church informed.
"You want us to get into deep shit with the higher ups and the locals?" Roll demanded, "That's it! Both of you, drop and give me fifty!"
"…What?" both asked.
"I SAID DROP AND GIVE ME FIFTY!"
Both screamed before they began to do the push-ups. Roll nodded at the sight of the two more-knowledgeable members as she began to pace before them.
"Understand this; we are not here to be idiots! We are here to protect what's ours from the Reds!" Roll informed, "Now, Private Caboose has a point. Why don't we just attach weaponry to our carrier vessels? Mainly, it is because we don't have the budget for it. Furthermore, the vessels are too large to properly use in military comabat. Now then, how long were you two under the command of Sargent Flowers?"
"Two hours," Church replied between grunts.
"…Two hours? Are you telling me he died just two hours after landing here?!"
"N-No!" Tucker replied, "We were here for a week before he had the heart attack."
"Very well. That's enough for now. You can finish the fifteen you have later, Cobalt, and the twenty-seven you have, Aquamarine."
"Okay, Private Donut, here's the deal," Simmons informed.
"I just refuse to call him Private Donut!" Grif informed as Rock was snickering a storm beside him.
"After what Rock has just informed Grif and I, we've got a very important mission for you. You think you can handle it?" Simmons asked.
"Absolutely!" Donut saluted.
"We need you to go to the store, and get two quarts of elbow grease."
"Yeah and uh, pick up some headlight fluid for the Puma too," Grif added.
"The what?"
"He means the Warthog."
"The truck down there with the turret," Rock added, pointing at the Warthog, "Guy who's working on it is Lopez. He doesn't talk, so don't both trying to chat with him."
"You do know where the store is, right, rookie?" Grif asked.
"What? Yeah, yeah, of course I do. Sure, no problem," Donut replied.
"Well, get going then," Simmons ordered before Donut ran off.
"Other way," Grif pointed out, making Donut skid to a halt and run the other way.
"I knew that. Just got turned around that's all."
"…How long do you think until he figures out there's no store?" Simmons asked once Donut left.
"I say…at least a week," Grif replied.
"I'll go with he mistakes Blue Base for a store," Rock informed.
"So what did you say they had again?" Grif asked.
Rock sighed, "They got a tank and two new soldiers. One of them seems to be a Sargent like Sarge is."
Nearby, Donut stopped and looked back at Red Base, "Elbow grease…How stupid do they think I am?" he proceeded to run off, "Once I get back to base with that headlight fluid, I'm gonna talk to the Sergeant."
"You know what? Forget what I said before. We can definitely pick up chicks in this thing. Probably two or three chicks a piece," Tucker noted as he and Church looked up at the tank with Roll and Caboose.
"Oh man, listen to you. What're you gonna do with two chicks?" Church asked.
"Church, women are like Voltron: The more you can hook up, the better it gets," Tucker grinned under his helmet until Roll's fist slammed onto the top of his helmet.
"Soldier, let me give you a piece of advice; don't consider women like that. You'll get killed or sent to the ER for that talk around them," Roll informed, 'But go on and keep talking. That way, I can justify my reasons for shooting your head off.'
"You think that we were too mean to the kid?" Simmons asked.
"Nah, he'll just wander around on the cliffs for a few hours. What's the worst that could happen?" Grif asked.
"A week's chores on him mistaking Blue Base for a store and ending up with the flag," Rock betted.
"…Deal," Grif replied, shaking Rock's hand.
"Finally, there it is," Donut sighed in relief before he ran down to the Blue Base, "…Oh sweet! They sell tanks!"
"Yeah I'll let you in on a little secret, I've uh... I've actually got a girl back home," Church informed.
"Oh yeah? Girlfriend or wife?" Tucker asked.
"No, man, she's just my girlfriend, ya know? We were gonna get married, but I got shipped out... ah, you know how it works," Church noted.
"Oh," Tucker frowned under his helmet.
"When you get back, will you marry her?" Roll asked.
"I'm not gonna get married," Caboose informed, "My dad always said, 'Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?'"
"…Remind me to never meet your father. Or else, I'll rip his nuts off and shove them up his ass," Roll ordered Caboose.
"Oh, he's dead," Caboose replied.
"…And now I feel like a dick for that," Roll facepalmed.
"Hey, rookie…did you just call my girlfriend a cow?" Church asked once he processed what Caboose just said.
"No, I think he called her a slut!"
"He did it," Caboose pointed at Tucker.
"That's Tucker, Mikey-kun," Roll sighed, having figured their names outs already.
"Tucker did it."
"I'll tell you what, noob, I could sit out here and listen to you insult my girlfriend all day long, but as it turns out, I got a lot more important job for you to do," Church informed.
"What?"
"Great."
"See, we've got this General…"
"Right, the General guy."
"…who likes to come by and make random inspections of bases. So what I'm gonna have you do, is I'm gonna have you go in the base, and stand right next to the flag at attention, just in case he decides to come by."
"What General? I haven't been informed of this," Roll informed.
"Oh, it's really new," Church informed.
"When is he coming by?" Caboose asked.
"We never know. Could be today, could be a week from now," Tucker replied.
"You want me to stand at attention for a week?"
"You know, you don't sound very grateful. This is the most important job at the whole base. You're gonna be right there with the flag," Church informed.
"What's so important about the flag?"
"Oh, come on, don't they teach you guys anything in training?" Church asked in disbelief.
"They didn't tell us anything about a flag. Why is it so important?" Caboose asked.
"Yes. Enlighten us, Private Church," Roll agreed.
"Because it's the flag, man, you know, it's the f... it's the flag, it's…" Church looked over at Tucker, "Tucker, you tell them why the flag is so important."
"Well... it's... it's complicated. Uh... It's blue, we're blue."
Roll clapped slowly, almost mockingly, "Wow. Nice explanation."
"Shut up, bastard," Tucker muttered.
"It's just important, okay? Trust us and trust in Sargent Flowers since he told us the flag was important," Church informed before Roll could do anything, "So when the General comes by, the first thing he's gonna want to do is inspect the flag."
"Right," Tucker nodded.
"So just go in there, you know, far away from us, and wait for him."
"…" Caboose looked at Roll.
"Go on, Mikey-kun. I'm sure you'll do good with this first job. Then, when it's night, Tucker will be the one who guards it during the night shift," Roll informed.
"Heh. Yeah!" Tucker agreed before realizing something, "Wait, what?"
"Uh, how will I know when I see him?" Caboose asked.
"There's only four of us out here, rookie. He's gonna be the guy that doesn't look like one of us," Tucker replied.
Roll sighed, "Caboose, most likely, the General will be in armor like we have, but different as well. I wish you luck."
"Now get in there, and don't come out!" Church added before he turned to Tucker, "Man, that guy is dumber than you are."
"You mean he's dumber than you are."
"Wow, Tucker, that was a great come-back."
"Well, excuse my little brother for his autism," both men flinched as Roll stood over them, "Now listen up. I'm going to scout out Red Base. Contact me immediately if anything happens here that doesn't involve you two bitching about everything! I'll also make this interesting; if you treat Private Michael J. Caboose good for the rest of the day, I will ask Blue Command to deliver some special shipments of rifles and machine guns."
"Oh sweet!" Tucker cheered as Caboose poked his head out of the entrance.
"Uh, Mr. Church? Sir?" Caboose called out.
"Oh my god, WHAT!?" Church demanded before saying to Tucker, "Tucker, I swear, I'm gonna kill him!"
"Sorry about calling your girl a slut…"
"Uh-oh," Roll noted as she saw Church's helmet turn red with steam coming out of it.
"ROOKIE! SHUT UP! JUST SHUT UP, YOU'RE DRIVING ME CRAZY, GET IN THERE!" Church roared out as he fired his sniper rifle at him a few times, each one missing, "FUCK!"
"Uh-huh huh huh huh!"
Church turned around to face Tucker's back, "Tucker, are you laughing at me?"
Roll sighed before walking off, "Remember; Take care of my little brother or else, you two!"
"Yes, sir!" Church groaned, unaware of Donut walking up behind the two.
"We're not really doing that, are we?" Tucker asked.
"We don't have a choice if Caboose really is the Sargent's little brother," Church replied, "Shit."
"Excuse me, sir, can I ask you a question?"
"Dear God in Heaven, rookie, if I turn around, and you are not inside, I…I can't be held responsible for what I'm gonna do to you!" Church informed, not once looking back.
"What did I do?"
"One…"
"Aw, gimme a break."
"TWO!"
"Fine!" Donut yelped before he ran into the base and walked up to Caboose.
"Wow, you got here fast!"
"Why is everyone so freakin' rude in this canyon?"
"I'm not, sir, nor is my Big Sister who leads this team. What can I do for you?" Caboose offered.
"Finally, someone with a little respect around here."
"Yes, sir! I assume you're here because of this…" Caboose motioned to the flag.
"Wait, is this all you have?"
"Uh, yes, sir. That's it!" Caboose replied.
"Aw man, this figures. Shit…" Donut muttered before asking, "What about elbow grease?"
"Uhmm…"
"Headlight fluid?"
"No. All we have is this flag. Sorry, sir."
"Well, I can't go back empty handed. I guess I'll take that."
"Sure, that makes sense. I guess," Caboose shrugged as he took the flag out of its holder and handed the pole to Donut.
"Man, they're gonna give me so much shit for coming back with just this stupid flag," Donut complained to himself as he ran out of the base with the flag.
"Well, enough gabbing out of us, let's take this bad boy out for a spin," Church beamed at the tank before turning his head to Tucker, "Go ahead and hop in, Tucker."
"Me? I can't drive that thing."
"You're telling me you're not Armor Certified?"
"I ca-I don't even know how to use the fucking sniper rifle. Don't you know how to drive that?"
"No! …Holy Crap! Who is running this army!?" Church screamed out before contacting Roll, "Sargent to Private Church. Come in, Sargent!"
=Your CO here, what do you need?=
"Do you know how to drive a tank?"
=Of course I do! Can't you?=
"Negative," Church replied as Caboose walked out of the base.
"Hey! Just wanted to let you know the General stopped by and picked up the flag!" Caboose called.
"Yeah! Okay! Whatever, moron!"
=Hey! Are you bad-mouthing Mikey-kun?=
"Uh…Um…No?" Church gulped before what Caboose said caught up to him, "…Wait a second…What did Caboose just say?"
"Let me get this straight…You gave this guy our flag?" Church demanded as they stood on the top of Blue Base.
"Is that bad?" Caboose asked innocently.
"You did say that it wouldn't be one of us that was the 'General.'"
"Bad? Oh no, that's not bad. Next time he comes over, why don't you just help him blow up the whole goddamn base?" Church snapped at Caboose.
"There, there he is," Tucker pointed before Church looked through his sniper rifle.
"Where?" Church asked before settling his sights on Donut, "Oh, yeah, oh, I got him. He's sneaking around back behind the cliffs."
"He must be one smart son of a bitch," Tucker noted.
"Perhaps."
"Oh, man, I am so freakin' lost," Donut groaned as he looked around, "Where the hell is the base?"
"Oh, shit... Hey Tucker, look at his armor. It's red."
"Oh man, that means it's their Sergeant."
"Or it could be a new cadet," Roll added, "Never assume it's their leader just because they wear the same color, soldiers."
"Well, that makes sense. At least now we know how he got by our defenses," Church noted, "If he's the Sargent of Red Team, then that's how. If he's just a rookie, he must have just gotten lucky."
"Uh, you know…he came in the back door where you guys were standing," Caboose pointed out.
"…He did?"
"Uh-huh."
"…I'll take the blame, then."
"Yeah, okay, well let's take him out then," Tucker urged.
"Roger that," Church confirmed as he looked through the rifle once more, "Okay, say goodnight, Sarge."
Church pulled the trigger four times. Four bullets raced out of the barrel and raced across the sky, all towards Donut. Yet, instead of hitting him, his of the shots missed. Donut quickly crouched down to try to avoid being hit.
"Son of a bitch!" Donut cursed.
Back at Blue Base, Roll and Tucker slowly turned their heads to look at Church. Church slowly returned the looks.
"…What?" Church asked.
"You're really not very good with that thing, are you?" Tucker asked.
"…Church, you are getting emergency lessons on Sniper Rifles later," Roll stated.
"Yes, sir…" Church grumbled.
"Hey! It's me! Don't shoot! I'm the guy that bought the flag, remember!?" Donut shouted to them, waving the flag.
"Oh great, now he's taunting us. That's just embarrassing," Tucker facepalmed.
"Looks more like he doesn't want to get shot to me," Roll chuckled (the voice modifier changed her giggles to chuckles for some reason).
"Alright, that's it, I've had it," Church growled before turning to Caboose, "Rookie, you stay here. Me and Tucker, we'll head through the teleporter, we'll cut him off at the pass."
"Right!" Caboose nodded.
"Good plan so far," Roll nodded, "Seems you've had practice since Flowers passed away."
"I have," Church nodded before facing Tucker, "Tucker, you ready? Let's go."
"There is no way I'm going through that thing."
"Why not?" Roll asked, "You tested it, correct?"
"We threw rocks through it," Church replied, "They came out the other side."
"Yeah, but they were all hot and covered with black stuff," Tucker replied.
"Soot."
"Oh, so I guess that's what this is all about then. You're afraid of a little black stuff," Church pointed out.
"Yes. I am. I am afraid of black stuff."
"…Tucker, I almost hate to do this to you," Church informed before raising his gun at Tucker.
"You wouldn't…" Tucker squeaked.
"You know, I look at it this way: Either A, we go through there and get the flag back, or B, we stay here and I get to kill you. Either way, I win."
Roll slapped the back of his head, "Don't threaten your fellow soldiers, Church!" she faced Tucker, "Tucker, those were just rocks. They're not people. That soot? It's a side-effect of the teleporter that hasn't been corrected yet, but you won't be hurt."
"Okay…But I'm still scared."
"Duly noted. Now get in there," Church ordered.
"Crap…" Tucker muttered before facing the teleporter, "Alright. One, two…"
Tucker proceeded to run through the green 'doorway.' The trio looked at where the exit was…and waited…and waited…and you get the point.
"...Huh, he didn't come out the other side..." Caboose noted.
"Oh boy. This isn't good."
"Yeeaahhh, I've uh- I've decided I'm not gonna use the teleporter," Church informed before running off the back and chased Donut.
"…Can you turn it off now?" Caboose asked once Church was far enough away.
"Yes. But I'm turning it back on when we get closer to them if they need assistance," Roll replied.
"I still have no idea what you're talking about. I didn't hear any shots," Simmons informed.
"I'm telling you, it was four shots. Like bam, bam, bam," Grif replied.
"Wait a second, that's only three bams," Rock counted.
"Bam," Grif added the last one before seeing Church through a sniper rifle, "Wait a second, we've got a Blue guy on the move out there."
"Is it that new Sargent they have?" Rock asked, having seen similarities between Sarge's armor and the armor one of the new men had.
"No. It's that guy with lousy aim," Grif replied.
"Where's he headed?" Simmons asked as Grif looked to the left of Church.
"Oh crap. It... It's Donut. And he's got something…" Grif replied as he zoomed in, "It looks like…" Grif froze for a few seconds as he saw that it was the Blue's flag, "…Rock…Simmons, get the Warthog."
"Heh, you mean the Puma?" Simmons joked.
"Yeah, keep making jokes. That'll win the war," Grif rolled his eyes.
"Freeze!" Church ordered as he cut Donut off.
"Hey, why the hell are you shooting at me?! You coulda hit me, dick!" Donut complained.
"Can it," Church ordered as he pressed the barrel of his sniper to Donut's chest area, "Don't try to play stupid with me, Sarge. I know who ya are. We've been spying on you for three weeks now."
"I just got here two hours ago. And I'm not a Sergeant, I'm a Private," Donut whimpered.
"…Wait a minute, you're not the Sergeant!" Church exclaimed as he lowered his rifle.
"Yeah, that's what I just said."
"Well then how the hell did you manage to steal our flag?" Church raised a brow.
"Steal? I have no idea what the hell you're talking about!" Donut argued before Tucker came out of the teleporter between them, his armor covered in soot.
"…Three!"
"JESUS!" Church screamed as he and Donut jumped back in fright and startlement.
"HOLY SHIT! Who is this guy?" Donut demanded.
Church looked the gut over before realizing who it was, "What in the hell!? Tucker? Is that you?"
"How did you get up here ahead of me?"
"And what's with that black shit on your armor?" Donut asked.
"Hey!" Tucker turned and aimed his assault rifle at Donut, "Freeze, Sarge!"
"Would you stop calling me a Sergeant? I'm still just a Private," Donut groaned.
"…The Sarge is still a Private?" Tucker asked as he slowly lowered his weapon before gasping, "Oh. My. God. The teleporter sent me back in time."
'Really?!' Church thought with a facepalm.
"Sorry Lopez, we need the jeep," Grif informed as they got into the Warthog.
"Shotgun!" Rock declared as he got into shotgun before the others could stop him, whipping out a shotgun painted blue at the barrel of it.
"I'll take gunner," Simmons responded as he got into the back, "Let's roll."
"Right!" Rock nodded as Grif turned it on…before Tejano music began to blare out of the radio.
"How do you turn off the fucking radio in this car?" Grif demanded.
"What? It's Tejano! Polkas y Huapangos by Jaime y Los Chamacos to be precise. I love this music!" Rock argued, "I asked Lopez to install this every time the Warthog turns on."
"Why?!"
"Because it's a good surprise attack. They'll all be like 'is that music?' as we get closer. And then…BLAMMO!" Rock slammed his fist into his palm, startling the two he was riding with, "We win with a sneak attack!"
"Don't worry Lopez, I'll bring her back in one piece," Simmons assured as they drove off.
"And if not, blame Simmons!" Rock waved.
"…" Lopez just watched them go.
"Look, I know you don't know me, but you have to believe what I'm about to tell you," Tucker began to inform Church, "Some time in your future I get stationed here in Blood Gulch, and we meet. And this guy here, he gets promoted to Sergeant of the Red Army, and we spy on them. And they get this new jeep, and I'm all like, 'There is no way you can pick up chicks in a tank!'"
"Tucker? What the fuck are you babbling about?" Church demanded calmly, slowly losing his temper with his teammate.
"I know all this sounds crazy, but he…" Tucker points at Donut, "…eventually becomes a Sergeant, and then one day we get a tank, and he comes and steals our flag while we're distracted."
"Is this guy a retard?" Donut pondered to Church.
"Red? Shut up. Tucker? Listen to me. Ya haven't gone back in time, okay? This is the guy who stole the flag, he's just not the Sergeant," Church informed as Tejano music began to play louder as the seconds passed, "Turns out he's just some dumb rookie who happens to have the same color armor as him. He got in somehow, just…for God's sake! WHAT IS THAT MUSIC!?"
=Bogies inbound!= Roll shouted over the radio in Church and Tucker's helmets just before the Warthog shot over the hill behind them.
"Woohoo!" Grif whooped.
"Holy shit!" Tucker yelped as the three barely ducked in time.
"Son of a bitch! Run! Jesus! Run!" Church shouted as the two quickly ran off.
"The jeep followed me back in time!" Tucker screamed.
=For the love of Kami-sama, Tucker, you aren't in the past!= Roll, having heard everything, snapped =You are in the present, not the past! Get your head in the game, boy!=
Grif hopped out of the Warthog as Simmons yelled and fired at Church and Tucker as they ran away. Tucker gave a girlish scream as he jumped out of the way of a few shots that nearly hit him.
"Ow! Git! Ow! Git! Ow, ow!" Church yelped.
"That's right! That's right, I got your ass! Get off your ass and run, you cock bites! Right now! Yeah, not so pretty when you gotta run are you! Yeah, that's right! Stay there! You know where your flag is?" Simmon demanded as Roll looked through her personal sniper rifle at them, "We're gonna get you! Come on! Don't be a wimp! Come on, Blue! Come on, get out there! I've got a whole barrel of love to shoot you with! Come on! Get out now! Yeah, come on out! I know you like this! Come out where I can get you! Come on! Don't be a wimp! Come on, Blue! Be tough, get out there!"
"What the hell is going on here?" Grif demanded.
"You know what? I honestly have no idea what's going on. I think everyone in this canyon is absolutely insane," Donut replied.
"How did you get the flag?" Grif asked.
"I don't know, I just asked for it."
Simmons stopped shooting for a few seconds at that while Grif asked, "Wait, that worked?"
"I guess," Donut shrugged, "Is it not supposed to?"
"I don't know, we…never even thought to try that. Just take the flag to the base, we'll explain there," Rock ordered as Simmons resumed firing.
"Not until someone tells me what the fuck is go-" Donut began as Rock began to load up his shotgun.
"There's no time to explain, rookie! Just take the flag, and go to base! I'll explain everything there," Grif interrupted as he pointed at Red Base's direction.
"Fine!" Donut started running through the Gulch before Rock stopped him and turned him around.
"Wrong base, but good effort," Rock informed.
"Uh, I know. I just got turned around, that's all," Donut replied as he ran off to the Red Base.
"What a dumbass," Grif snorted.
"Oh man, that's not good," Caboose noted.
"Yeah," Roll nodded, having turned off her radio from Tucker and Church to talk normally, "Want to see?"
"Yeah," Caboose nodded.
"Here," Roll handed him her sniper rifle and he looked through it.
"Oh my god, that jeep has a really big gun," Caboose whimpered before he handed the weapon back to its owner and began to start looking back and forth between the fight and the tank, "Stay here... Tank... Stay here... Tank…"
"…Ah, screw it," Roll snorted before dragging Caboose off, "Come on. We've got a pair of Blue Men to save."
"Yeah, get going! Take that! I know you like that there! Come out! Come here! Poke your head up! Come on, Blue! Get your head out there!"
"Someone seems a little too trigger happy," Rock sweatdropped.
"Big time," Grif agreed.
"Well, we'll just wait here. That thing's gotta run outta bullets some time," Church noted, he and Tucker hiding behind a large rock.
"My god, doesn't that thing ever run out of bullets?" Church groaned a little bit later.
"You know, in hindsight, we should have brought the tank," Tucker noted.
"Hey, Tucker, what good is a tank gonna do us if nobody here knows how to drive it?" Church demanded.
"Yeah, I can see how hiding behind a rock is a much better strategy," Tucker agreed after a few seconds of thinking.
"Well, yeah, but... oh man, I guess I gotta give that one to ya," Church nodded.
"Ugh. They just had to bring it here on only enough energy to let it drop off," Roll muttered as Caboose got into the cockpit, "Okay! She's all charged up!"
Hello, and thank you for activating the M808V Main Battle Tank. You may call me Sheila=
"Hello. Sheila. Big tank lady," Caboose greeted shyly.
=Would you like me to run the tutorial program?=
"Oh, that'd be very nice. Thank you," Caboose replied with a nod.
"Delay that order, Sheila," Roll ordered, "Override code: Sigma-Six-Nine-Delta."
=Acknowledged. What do you need to know?=
"Before we engaged the tutorial program, is your Friendly Fire protocol active?"
=It is not=
"Activate it."
=Acknowledged. Friendly Fire Protocol activated. Friendly forces may now be avoided by Auto-Lock=
"Good. Sheila, please activate the Tutorial Program for Mikey-kun, okay?"
=Tutorial program activated. This program is intended to instruct non-certified personnel in the use of this Scorpion class tank. Let's begin with some driving=
"Okay," Caboose nodded.
"Careful, Mikey-kun, she has six pedals," Roll advised.
"Simmons. SIMMONS!" Grif shouted, earning Simmons's attention and had him stop firing, "Man, that thing is loud."
"You're telling me," Rock agreed, the Reds unaware of Sheila driving by behind them, Roll sitting beside Caboose on top of the tank, "That's louder than the time my family had that stubborn mule at h…"
"WHAT?" Simmons interrupted with a loud shout.
Grif sighed before writing down a sign for Simmons that read, 'Come on, let's sneak around the back of the rock and get 'em out.'
"OKAY."
"Keep it down! Jesus. Let's go, before they figure out what's going on," Rock shouted.
"…How did you do this?" Roll raised a brow in surprise, witnessing Sheila trying to get off a tall rock.
=Now that you've mastered driving the M808V, let's move on to some of the safety features=
"No, no, wait, go back! Why are there six pedals if there are only four directions?" Caboose whined.
"Told you," Roll rolled her eyes.
Church slowly began peeking out from the side of the rock. Tucker was still standing behind it.
"Psst, hey, they stopped firing," Church whispered.
"Why are you whispering?"
"Umm…I don't know," Church whispered, sweatdropping, as Grif, Simmons, and Rock were on a cliff nearby.
"Aw, crap, I don't think we're gonna be able to get around this way," Grif noted.
"Tell me again, uh, why did we get out of the jeep?" Simmons asked, unaware of Sheila rolling up right behind them.
"Well, I guess it was this or sit there and watch you shoot rocks all day long," Rock noted.
"Well, at least that was fun," Simmons admitted.
"Ahem."
Rock turned to see them, "Hey." He turned back, "Yeah. I have to admit that you seemed happier than normal and…" he turned to the tank, "Whhhhhaaaaaaaaat?"
"Holy CRAP!" Grif yelped, "What in God's name is that thing?"
"Tucker, don't be stupid. They're just trying to draw us out," Church advised as Tucker had changed places with him in spying.
"No they're not, look - they left the jeep. They're gone," Tucker assured as Church began to peek as well.
"Well, I don't know about this. It seems pretty fishy, but…" Church trailed off as he thought of the pros and cons of what he was about to do, "…alright screw it, let's go get it."
"Dudes, hold still. I don't think it sees us," Grif whispered.
"If Sheila can't, I can," Roll informed.
"Who are you?" Simmons asked.
"Sargent Rhodes, new leader of the Blue Army. The one driving our tank, Sheila, is named Michael J. Caboose," Roll informed.
"Hello~!" Caboose greeted.
A tone went off in Sheila, indicating target lock. Sheila's turret pointed at Grif, then it turned to Simmons.
"Why is it just sitting there?" Rock asked.
"Just trying to mess with our heads. Let's get back to the Warthog," Grif informed.
"Sheila, target that vehicle," Roll whispered.
=This tank is equipped with an auto-fire sequence that can be activated by pressing the auto-fire button=
"Auto-fire, auto-fire, here, here! No, wait... okay, that's more a switch than a button…" Caboose muttered to himself as he began to search for it.
=This will end the tutorial, and should only be activated if proper safety procedures-=
"Okay, you ready? Let's do this on three. One…" Simmons began to count.
"Wait. On three? Or three and then go?" Grif interrupted.
"On three. It's always faster to go on three," Rock informed, "We always go on 'three.'"
"Okay, okay. On three," Grif nodded.
"Here!" Caboose beamed as he pushed the button.
=Tutorial deactivated. Auto-fire sequence activated=
"Ready?" Simmons asked.
"Ready here," Rock nodded, neither aware of Grif slowly moving towards the Warthog.
=Acquiring target=
"I'm going for the jeep. Cover me," Church ordered before he jumped over the rock and began to slowly approach the Warthog.
"One…" Simmons began.
=Target acquired=
"Oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit…" Grif panted in his run.
"Two…" Rock added.
=Target locked=
"Three!" both shouted as they turned around and saw Grif running away.
"Oh, you back-stabbing cock bite!" Simmons cursed.
"Bastard!" Rock snapped.
"FIRE!" Roll commanded.
=Firing main cannon=
With that, Sheila open fired. Rock tackled Simmons down just as Sheila began to fire. The explosion sailed through the air and collided with the Warthog, making it go up a small explosion.
"Son of a bitch!" Simmons cursed.
"SON OF A BITCH!" Grif screamed in fear, his orange armor growing darker near the crotch area.
"Son of a bitch!" Church yelped as he ducked back behind the rocks.
=Firing main cannon=
"Shit!" Simmons yelped as he and Rock barely rolled out of the way of another firing.
"Run away!" Rock shouted as he and Simmons dashed off after Grif.
=Firing main cannon=
"Dammit!" Grif screamed as the shot blew up near them.
=Firing main cannon=
"Whoo! Go, Sheila!"
"Hey dude, the jeep blew up," Tucker informed as Church made it back up to the rock they had hid behind.
"No kidding. Thanks for the update, Tucker," Church growled at him while Grif, Simmons, and Rock ran behind a sturdy rock.
=Firing main cannon=
"Hey, I have a great idea. Let's get out of the jeep and sneak around the back of the rock," Simmons mocked Grif.
=Firing main cannon=
"Great plan, you idiot!" Simmons snorted.
=All targets eliminated. Acquiring new target=
"I think they're still behind the rock, Sheila-chan," Roll noted.
"Hey, Tucker, look at this, man - it's the rookie and Sargent!" Church beamed, "And they brought tank out to scare off the Reds…with the rookie driving it!"
"What? No way!" Tucker snorted as Church got up.
"Hey, rookie! Good job, man! Why didn't you tell us you knew how to drive the tank?" Church asked.
"He just learned it!" Roll replied, "It came with a tutorial program!"
"…It did?" Church asked as he and Tucker slid down the slope to regroup, giving Grif, Rock, and Simmons the perfect opportunity to flee.
"What happened?" Donut asked, still holding the flag, as the trio came running up the ramp.
"Big... Tank... Shooting... Whooooh!" Grif panted.
"Damn, man, we only ran like three hundred feet. You are really out of shape," Simmons noted.
"Fuck... You..."
"Where's your car?" Donut asked.
"General Patton here had a great strategy to leave it behind," Simmons replied.
"Hey, it would have worked if that tank hadn't shown up."
"You lost the jeep? Oh man, Lopez is gonna be pissed," Donut noted, "Where is it?"
The Warthog suddenly flipped up on the base from below by an explosion, landing between Donut and the other three. They slowly looked at it before turning outwards to where Sheila and the Blue Team were.
"What the hell…!?" Grif yelped before seeing Sheila firing once more, "SON OF A BITCH!"
"Oh crap!" Donut screamed as they ran behind the Warthog, "What the hell is that thing?"
"That's the tank!" Grif replied.
"Hey uh, Grif, uh, you wanna hold the flag for a little bit?" Donut offered before Sheila fired another round.
"No, keep that away from me!" Grif snapped.
"Why do you keep firing at the jeep?" Church asked.
"Because it's locked on!" Caboose replied.
=Target locked=
"Well, unlock it," Tucker ordered.
"Sheila, cease fire," Roll ordered, making Sheila stop, "Attention, Red Team! Return our flag and we will leave. If you do not, we will destroy your base, steal your flag, and crush you all under Sheila's treads! And take our flag back!"
"Wow. That guy's more determined than a warthog being called just a pig," Rock compared.
(CUTSCENE)
"Honey, I'm home!" a hyena called as he entered his house and began to take care of his tie, hat, and jacket, "Oh, you would not believe the work today. We were chasing and chasing and then we finally got breakfast and then we chased and chased and got lunch and now I'm home an…"
He stopped in his tracks and gasped. His wife was on the counter, a knife in her back, stuffed to the point of bursting with stuffing, and an apple in her mouth. Written messily on her was 'They call me Mister Pig!' Running to an open window, he saw a warthog running off.
"You bastard!" the hyena shouted, shaking a fist at the warthog…until a pack of hyenas tackled the warthog over and ate him.
(END CUTSCENE)
"…That was a bit…morbid," Grif admitted.
"The fuck was that?!" Tucker shouted.
"Sorry! He does that a lot!" Simmons apologized.
"What? If you were born in Rhode Island, you'd also have that cool trick!" Rock argued.
"Return the flag!"
"Nevah!" Rock declared, standing up and pointing at the sky while looking at them.
"Sheila, resume firing!"
=Target locked=
"Oh shit! It's an Australian Tank!" Rock screamed as he ducked the shot…only for the shot to spin around and boomerang into the Warthog, "You see?! It shoots bombs like boomerangs!"
"I hate to be the one to point this out guys, but I think we're screwed," Donut noted.
"Yeah. I have to agree with the rookie on this one," Simmons nodded.
"Sarge, come in! Sarge, please come in!" Rock cried on the radio.
=Blood Gulch Outpost Number One. Come in, Blood Gulch Outpost, come in. Do you read me? This is Sergeant-=
"Oh my god, Sarge, is that you?" Grif asked, connecting to the feed.
=Roger that, Private. I am currently in-bound to your position from Command=
"Sir, this is Simmons."
=Hello, Simmons. I hope everything's gone alright while I've been gone=
"Help us, please!" Rock begged on the line, "They've got a tank from Australia on their side!"
=What?=
"Actually, sir, things are kind of hectic right now. The new rookie arrived, and somehow he managed to…" Grif winced as Sheila fired another shot, "…infiltrate the Blue Base, and now we have their flag, the Warthog is damaged, one of their…" another shot went off, "…guys is demanding we surrender, and there's this huge fucking tank…"
"From Australia!"
"…about to destroy our base."
=…=
"…"
=…Am Ah talkin' to th' right base?"
"Sarge," Grif informed calmly as Sheila fired another round, "WE. ARE GOING. TO DIE HERE!"
"Do you want a turn?" Caboose offered Church.
"You bet!" Church replied as the two traded places.
=Driver canopy locked=
=Well then hold tight, boys. I think I gotta solution to your little "tank" problem= Sarge chuckled on the line to the Reds.
"Oh yeah! We've almost got them!" Tucker whooped before noticing the sky growing darker, "Huh?"
Roll looked up, "Uh oh."
A large aircraft vessel began to fly over Red Base. Tucker, Roll, and Caboose all gulped.
"H-Hey, Church?" Tucker started backing up, "Y-you might wanna get out of the tank. Like right now."
"I can't figure out how to get this thing open!" Church started to freak.
=Night vision engaged=
"Church, get out now!" Roll shouted as shells began to land progressively nearer to the tank, each impact exploding.
"I can't get out!" Church freaked, "Sargent, get out of here!"
"Not without one of my men!" Roll argued as she tried to pry the canopy off.
"…I'm sorry," Church apologized before he managed to get control of Sheila's cannon and used it to strike Roll away from Sheila.
"Church!" Tucker screamed.
"Good-bye," Church accepted his fate.
At that point, the shells slammed down upon Sheila. The series of explosions that followed began to send her tumbling away from Red Base. One of the explosions broke open the canopy only for Church to be hit with a shell. Tucker and Caboose ran away, Caboose easily carrying the Sargent of Blue Team.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Roll cried out.
"Oh crap, oh crap, oh crap, oh crap! Running, running, running!" Caboose freaked before they got to a safe distance away, "Man, that was close."
"Look at your tank though. A…And Church, too," Tucker pointed out.
Roll didn't want to look. She hated this part, no matter how many times she saw it. Sheila's body seemed to still be intact, but her treads and cannon were blown off. Church's body was in one piece, but the armor was mostly melted, fused to the body.
=I'm scared, Dave. Will I dream? Daisy…= Sheila began to sing as her voice became distorted and elongated =Daisy...=
"Sheeeeiilaaaaa! Noooooo!" Caboose cried out.
"What? No! Sheila! Sheila!" Tucker cried out before realizing something, "W-Wait… Who's Sheila?"
"Sheila's the lady in the tank. She was my friend…" Caboose sniffled.
"Oh, dude!" Tucker gasped, "I knew you could pick up chicks in a tank!"
Roll slammed a fist into Tucker's face, making him spin three times before collapsing onto his back, knocked out. She looked back at the gruesome sight to see one of the Red soldiers walking over to it…carrying a medical kit?
"Rock! What are you doing, you idiot?!" Grif demanded.
"There was someone in there!" Rock called back, "I have to see if he's okay!"
Grif groaned, "Why does he have to do this every time someone gets shot and he thinks they're still alive? Did he forget about Manfredi and Johnson?"
"Who?" Donut asked.
"It's too painful to talk about," Simmons replied.
"Come on," Rock muttered as he dropped to his knees and rolled Church over, "Not good." He quickly reached into his medical kit and pulled out a stethoscope before putting it on Church's chest, "…Damn. He's fading bad."
Church groaned softly, "T…Tucker…Tucker!"
"I'm here, man," Tucker softly replied as the Blues ran over to their fallen comrade, " It's going to be okay, man."
"No. Ah... I'm na-I'm not gonna make it," Church got out, "Tucker...there's something I need to tell you."
"What is it?"
"I just want you to know… I always hated you. I always hated you the most."
"Yeah, I know you did. Now hurry up and die, you prick."
"Okay. Herk!...Bleah..."
Rock sighed as he removed the last of his armor aside from his combat boots and gloves. He just had to get away for a little bit every so often and found that if he went out at night with just the armor on his boots, he could actually hide in the dead of night. Plus, he wanted to not look at Grif in footy pajamas again.
"OooOooo…OooOooo…"
Rock stopped in his walking at the somber voice. Looking around, he heard the voice behind a rock.
"You and I were in a dream. You'd follow close wherever I'd lead~ The steps you'd echo on and on. You'd catch me safe if ever I fall~"
Rock slowly peeked over the rock and his face went red. Singing the tune was a woman in her mid-twenties, possibly around his age, even. She was lying on her back in one of his favorite spots to just gaze at the night sky, singing that sad tune. Even in the light of the night, he could see her soft, ivory/cream skin along with the solid black jumpsuit that hugged every curve of her body and didn't leave much to the imagination. Then again, looking down at his own black jumpsuit, he couldn't say much about that it left little to the imagination. All he had on besides his jumpsuit was his combat boots and his gloves. Peeking over the rock, he noted she had a pair of boots and gloves on as well. His face went redder at the sight of her sitting up to brush a bit of her long, flowing, golden locks of hair from her face. He was worried when he saw the puffy bits of her eyes, looking as if she had been crying.
"U…H-Hello?" the girl froze at Rock's voice, "A…Is everything okay?"
Roll had finally stopped her tears. She was never used to burying the dead, especially those under her command. Her first day on the job and she fucked up badly. In just her first few hours there, she had lost the flag, lost the tank, and one of her men was killed in what killed the tank since he was trying to get out of the tank since it had been so sudden. She was just glad this place had a good view of the night sky. She had always felt a little better when she just looked up at the sky, trying to find constellations or making them up.
"U…H-Hello?" Roll froze at the voice, "A…Is everything okay?"
Slowly, Roll turned her head to see who was asking. She faintly blushed and was thankful it was dark out so he couldn't see it. The boy before her was around her age, possibly the exact age. His shaggy, midnight-blue hair reached down to his shoulders with two bangs on the sides of his youthful face. His soft, dark-emerald eyes held within them a sense of confusion at her with worry mixed in. Like her, he had on a jumpsuit that was tight on his body, yet baggy near the crotch area.
"I…I'm fine," she replied, trying not to show her sadness.
"Then why did your singing sound so sad?" the young man asked, making her flinch, "…Is…Is it because you heard about the man who died today?"
"It…It's not just that. I came here to be with my…with the one who took me in," Roll informed as the man sat beside her, "I…I was so excited to see him and…and I learned that he died weeks ago. He had a heart attack while he was asleep."
Rock winced at that, "A…And the soldier today?"
"A subordinate of his. He…I saw that he had such great potential but…But he couldn't get out of the tank in time," she choked out a sob.
"…Were you able to give the man his proper rest?" Rock asked.
"I…I think so," she replied, "But…"
"But you don't think you were able to say 'good-bye' yet to either of them, huh?" Rock asked while he gazed at the stars, "Yeah. I…I know that well. This isn't the first war I've been in. Remember the war in Iraq?"
"Yes…"
"I was in that for the last parts of it," Rock informed, "A…A whole battalion was lost in a bombing, even my neighbor's son. We couldn't find any trace of his body, and they were just going to burn their bodies and not even bother to bury them."
"That's terrible!" she gasped.
"I know, right?" Rock snorted, "So, I volunteered to give them a proper burial. I knew a few of the men there and even played music with them at times. So, when I buried them all, I gave them one last song to hear as they went on."
"T…That sounds beautiful," Roll whispered.
"Yeah," he nodded, "Did you give either of them something like that?"
"N…No. I…I needed some time to think. I lost a man and the one who raised me all in one day," Roll replied, "So…So I came out here to think."
"Yeah. Sometimes I can't help but just look up there and think," he agreed before pointing at the sky, "At times, just to try to get my head a bit more clear, I'll make constellations. See those five up there? If you connect them right, you get a bunny rabbit's head, the little nose twitching a bit."
Roll giggled a little at that. She hadn't played that little game in a long, long time. Slowly, her gaze shifted to look over at where the two graves were buried. She tensed at the hand on her shoulder.
"Would you like me to help you pay some last respects for them?" he offered.
"I keep my guitar on hand at all times when I'm off-duty," Rock continued.
"T…That…That would be nice," she nodded slowly.
"Okay," Rock nodded, "I'm Rock, by the way. Rock Griffin."
"Rhodes…" Roll moved a bit of her hair away from her face, "Roll Rhodes."
"That a beautiful name," Rock complimented.
"Thanks. I like yours as well," Roll nodded, earning a chuckle from Rock.
Soon, the two were standing before the graves. Rock had to admit that he loved the flowers on the older grave and wondered to himself if blue flowers would grow on the other grave. Rock began to play a somber melody on his guitar. Roll slowly took a breath, closing her eyes as she put her hands together.
OooOooo~ OooOooo~ OooOooo~ OooOooo~
You and I were in a dream.
You'd follow close wherever I'd lead.
The steps you'd echo on and on.
You'd catch me safe if ever I fall.
Your hand in mine, we walked along.
No hill too high, no road was too long.
To stay with you, my only dream.
To share your life, whatever it means.
OooOooo~ OooOooo~
I knew you'd have to go away.
My love for you could not help you stay.
You drifted off day by day.
I cherished every breath that remained.
In my arms, close to me,
your body broke, your soul was set free.
You left this world, my treasured friend.
The chapter closed, but love has no end.
Farewell my angel. You are with me always.
Just close your eyes now. Next time we meet, it's forever.
Roll slowly opened her eyes as she finished her song. She wiped her eyes of her tears as she looked over at Rock.
"Thanks," she whispered.
"No problem," Rock replied with a smile, "Well, I gotta get back to the base I'm stationed at. Otherwise, my Sargent will kick my ass with his shotgun. And I do not want to be YJGS."
"What?"
"It's short for 'You Just Got Sarged,'" Rock chuckled, earning a giggle from her, "Ah. A smile! Perfect thing to see before going to bed," with that, he ran off, "Hope you feel better later, Roll."
"Rock Griffin, huh…" Roll whispered before she turned and walked into Blue Base, stopping to see Caboose walking out of his quarters with a yawn, wearing blue and white footy-pajamas and his helmet.
"Toilet," Caboose muttered as he walked off.
"…" Roll giggled a little, 'Maybe this place won't be as bad as I thought.'
Yes, I went with Megaman X Command Mission for X's design, but I think the design is cooler than any other basic armor we've seen him with!
Anyways, leave those reviews and if I get 15, then this becomes an actual story. AND I MEAN MORE THAN ONE SENTENCE ABOUT LIKING THE STORY AND/OR WANTING ME TO WRITE MORE! I AM SERIOUS ABOUT THIS! I WANT A GOOD REVIEW, DANG IT, WITH QUESTIONS AND QUERIES AND ALL THE STUFF LIKE THAT!
