I loooooove this chapter. :-)

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I was edgy as I walked to Math. I really wanted to talk to her about what happened with Hayden and what I should do. If she wasn't here and that other spitting-sweating-motherfucker from the other day was there, I was going to be livid.

When I opened the door and practically jumped into the room, a blanket of misery was lifted when I saw her sitting in her seat, talking with another student and pointing to a problem in the kid's book. Ah, yes. Thank the Lord.

Alice glanced around while the student spoke and when her gaze landed on me, her lips pulled into a tiny smile and she discreetly gave me a nod, silently saying hi. I smiled widely, maybe a little too widely and gave her a small wave before I headed to my seat and sat down.

After the bell rang, the kid thanked Alice, grabbed her book and headed towards the back. Finally, Alice was where she should be: in her desk, right in front of me, smiling that smile that I missed over the last couple days.

"Sorry I wasn't here Friday," she started while she looked over a paper. Her eyes darted to James's seat, which I followed and for some reason, he wasn't there. Was the funeral today?

Alice cleared her throat, put the paper to the side and then opened her book. "Ok. We have a new lesson today. Let's get started, all right?"


As I was sitting in my aiding period, I was a little annoyed. I didn't get a chance to talk to Alice because we actually did a lot of work in there today which didn't give me an opportunity to speak with her for a few minutes. And as Mr. Hurt lectured on about something that was entirely different from what he originally started on, I found myself struggling to think of excuses to go see her and ways to ask my teacher discreetly so the creepy sophomores didn't have a reason to look at me.

I sighed heavily, annoyed with the fact that I even needed to talk to someone about Hayden. I should love him. It's simple enough. We've been dating for six months and that's the next step. Hell, some girls love their man a week after dating him. Of course, that's not love. That's lust clouding their judgment.

I looked up to see Mr. Hurt inadvertently glance towards me and I took the opportunity without even thinking. "Bathroom?" I mouthed to him and cocked my head towards the door. He nodded and continued talking.

Grabbing my purse, I quickly left the room and let out the breath I had been holding once I had stood up. Am I going to skip pretty much? I swore I would never ever do that. I took a glance at the bathroom, considering if I should really go and just return to class and save tomorrow for talking to Alice.

It was like my body and mind were fighting against one another. I clearly wanted to go see her but my mind was saying that I could get in trouble and this was stupid. Then, a wonderful thought screamed in my head.

I'm a senior, bitch. I can do what I want.

I walked to her room quickly, already sorting out the story in my head from last night.

As I neared her room, I slowed down to catch my breath and think of a clever, witty thing to enter with. All of the things I thought of were dumb as hell and just made me cringe. Instead, I just turned the corner swiftly, saying, "Heyyy Alice," without even thinking.

I'm such a dumb bitch.

…Whoa. Alice was bent over, her jean-clad ass in perfect view for me as she sorted through some files underneath her desk. I saw the top of an iPod sticking out of her back pocket and the earphones slide up to her ear, which was partially covered by her hair. My eyes drifted back to her ass and something shot through me, shocked me. It came from my pelvis, shot up to my collarbone and settled right below my stomach with a single throb.

What…the…hell was that? My throat suddenly felt very dry and I clenched my teeth, annoyed with myself for my incapability to handle how my body reacts and even recognize what these…things mean half the damn time.

I set my books on the desk nearest to me, walked over towards her and softly put my hand on her back, feeling the tingle resonate in my fingertips and slide all the way to my elbow. Alice's body stiffened, she turned her head quickly to see me and then she relaxed and smiled. She pulled one of the earphones out and stood up, my hand leaving her back as she shivered her back slightly as though she got a chill. Is she cool? It's…not cold in here. Or…maybe that was her silent way of telling me to not touch her? Either way, I stood a step back and leaned against a desk.

"Hey Bella," she took her iPod out, turned it off and then pulled out the other earphone and set it down on her desk, giving me her full attention which made me immediately nervous. "How was your weekend, honey?"

Yeah, that's right. It's my fucking nickname. Not Nikolai's. Humph.

"Actually, I was wondering if I could talk to you about something, Alice…"

She looked at me for a moment and despite my best wishes, I felt my face heat up under her gaze. Damn it!

"Sure. I was just about to head out to get a quick snack. Do you want to go with me?"

Wha…? Leave school property? But I was already 'skipping'. I was bending my rules way too much for this chick. But even though my mind was telling me to clearly follow those rules, my mouth made the decision for me when I said, "Yeah, sure."


When we arrived at Zaxby's, my heart was still racing wildly from the ride over. Alice's driving scared the living shit out of me. She swerved in between cars, hit the gas like the idea of a possible accident was absurd, and just laughed and told me to calm down whenever she saw me grip the side of my door. I thought younger people like me were supposed to be reckless, careless drivers? Not the other way around.

The weird thing was that the entire time though, I felt oddly safe in her car. Ok, well no. I didn't feel safe in her car but I felt confident in that if something occurred like a person pulling out in front of us or doing something stupid, Alice would've handled it swiftly and avoided an accident. Although she laughed at me and glanced over at me several times, her grip was tight on the wheel and her feet were quick with the gas and brake. It's like when she walked—it looked so graceful and lithe that I knew she wouldn't trip or stumble. Same with her driving. Even while speeding far over the speed limit, I knew that she would glide through with no difficult whatsoever.

"We're on stable ground now, honey. You can relax," Alice teased me while we waited in line. I just gave her a pointed look and she smiled, and then rubbed my back for a moment, soothingly. The affectionate movement surprised me and the waves of tingles that spread through my entire torso were unfathomable. Usually I was ready for them, knowing that I was about to brush against her hand but this was so sudden that I couldn't prepare. I had to breathe. Finally, after an agonizing six seconds, she gave me a gentle pat and then lowered her hand back into the pocket of her jacket.

Do teachers normally just touch student's backs? I racked my brain for a memory but the tingles were battling against me, making it hard to breathe right now, much less look into my memories. Alice took a step forward as the line moved and that helped to somewhat regain focus.

Yes, they do. I distinctly remember several times when I was working that a teacher came up, touched my back, spoke to me while their hand was still there and then patted me and left. Another teacher, Ms. Gamble—whom I had grown very close to, almost a second grandmother—,during my sophomore year had rubbed my back just like Alice had done when I had mentioned that I wasn't feeling well and wanted to go to the clinic. It was just a teacher thing.

Faintly, I heard Alice's voice and then the tingles finally wore off, leaving a pleasant buzz throughout my whole body as if I had gotten drunk off her touch.

"And what would you like, ma'am?"

What? I raised my head, which was suddenly feeling very heavy and saw a young girl, maybe a college student, look expectantly at me. Oh, right.

"Uh, I'll get the fried house salad."

"And to drink?"

"Just some water, thanks."

"Together or separate?"

I looked at Alice and saw a flicker of something in her eyes before she straightened up and said quietly, "Together." My eyes narrowed at her and wondered why she suddenly was weird. It was just a simple question…

"All right. That'll be twelve thirty two."

Alice reached for her purse which was hanging over her shoulder but I quickly shuffled for mine. "No, no. I'll get it."

"No, really, Bella. I'll get it."

I quickly fumbled in my purse, withdrew my wallet and pulled out a creased, worn twenty. "Really. It's fine," I said while I handed the bill to the young girl who held it for a moment and then looked between us before lowering her head and punching in some numbers.

She handed me my money back and I stuffed them in my back pocket, glancing at Alice out of the corner of my eye to see her bit her lip as she reached for the drinks.

"Go on ahead and find us a table, please," she requested and since she added the 'please' unlike most people would, I acquiesced and found a small, private booth off in the corner. Who am I kidding? Even if she hadn't added the 'please' I still would've done what she told me to do. It's fucking Alice for God's sakes. I felt as thought I'd do anything she told me to do at this point.

I would've played with my phone and attempted to look busy but after shuffling with my purse for a few moments, I realized I must've left it in the car. Ugh. Gay. Hayden was probably going to leave me fifteen messages while Alice and I ate. Ever since that night, even though I hadn't said it back, he ended every text, every call, every meeting with "I love you". As if he was hoping that out of the millions of times that he said it during the day, that I would magically bulk up and say it back. If anything, it made me not want to say it more.

I sighed and turned my head, feeling myself getting annoyed with mere thoughts of Hayden and instead, turned my attention on Alice who was filling the cups and getting everything as if she knew her way around this place. I smiled softly as I watched her swiftly and gracefully handle everything in her dainty hands but it quickly faded when I saw a man, close to her age, come up behind her and say something as he filled his cup. She laughed, not quite as loudly as she did with me, and looked at him when she responded. What was she doing? Who was he? He's not even good looking! Well…if you find huge muscles, soft, curly brown hair, a white, perfect smile and dimples atrociously revolting. I watched her tuck a piece of hair behind her ear before she picked everything back up, laid a soft hand on his forearm, spoke again and made him laugh and then she walked away towards me. For some reason, I felt annoyed with her and especially him. Who the fuck does that? Just hits on some random woman you don't know in Zaxby's? Her smile was still on her face when she finally came to my table and set everything down.

"You okay, honey?" She inquired, a look of concern streaking across her face. Abruptly, I wondered if she called him honey while she spoke to him and felt that annoyance brewing inside grow.

"Yeah. I'm uh, I'm fine. Just really hungry," I grunted. She took a moment to look at me and then slid in the seat opposite me. "Did you, ya know, know him?"

Her brow creased and then comprehension struck her and she smiled softly. "Yes, he's close friends with my brother. I haven't seen him in months."

"Oh," I mumbled. Did he like her? She has a boyfriend, fucker. Best back the fuck off. I knew that my attitude would dampen our time together so I sighed and trudged forward. "How many siblings do you have?"

"I have three. Two brothers and a sister."

"Wow. Are you close to them?"

"Very," she said before she took a sip of her drink. "Even though I'm adopted, it feels as though they're my own blood." Another sip.

"You're adopted?"

She nodded and toyed with a piece of her hair. "Yeah. You want to hear the story?"

Learn more about her? Fuck yes, I would. Gladly. I hid my excitement though and just nodded and leaned back, ready to listen.

"Well, my mother was very young; too inexperienced for a child at the mere young of seventeen. Another problem was that her body just wasn't ready for me. My adoptive father, Carlisle was her doctor at the hospital that she went to when she went into labor. And…it got pretty bad. The cord was wrapped around my neck and since there wasn't a husband or a father that he could ask permission from, he had to tell my mother that he could save her…or me." A smile tugs at her lips. "And she said very quickly, without any hesitation, to save me. She died in childbirth and there was no one there to claim me. Her family wasn't there, no boyfriend or husband. Absolutely no one." She paused and then took a deep breath to continue. "Carlisle and Esme had been married for three years by that time and she can't have children, sadly so they decided to adopt me."

"I'm sorry you never got to know your mother."

"I'm sure she was an amazing woman. She must've really loved me if she told Carlisle to save me and not her. I don't know if I could be that selfless."

"When it comes to your own kids, I think you will. In fact, I think you'll be an amazing mother."

"Really?"

I nodded. "You already have a way with us at school. You're very easy going but if someone needs to be disciplined, you can flip that switch and be commanding."

"That's different, though. You guys are old enough to comprehend things. I don't know what I'd do with a screaming toddler," she chuckled.

"Thirty seven!" A heavy set woman with pigtails called after she emerged from the crowd, breaking our heart-to-heart. Was that us? My question was answered when Alice raised two fingers in the air, signaling her to come over. That lady did not look happy to walk from the front of the establishment all the way over to us. Finally, after a pointed look, she walked over; her grimace deepening upon closer inspection of us. What the hell was her problem?

She set Alice's food down a little sloppy and then almost tossed mine down onto the table. What a bitch. I glared at her and received another hard glower from her before she turned and waddled away.

Alice hardly noticed though and didn't comment. Instead, she just shared a look with me and then started eating. Have I heard her say anything negative about someone yet? Even after James made his inappropriate comment, she didn't gossip about him. God, was she really this perfect?

"You said," she started and then paused. I looked up at her, only to see her tongue snake out and lick the bottom of her lip, catching some ranch. For some reason, that throb before in her classroom reappeared and I squirmed in my seat. Perhaps my eyes stayed focused on her lips too long because when I finally tore them away to meet her eyes, she was staring at me with a curious and yet enticed look at the same time. The corner of her mouth rose a bit into a small smile and I clenched my teeth involuntarily at the sight.

"You said that you wanted to talk to me about something," she said finally, a knowing undertone underneath her words. I fidgeted in my seat, completely nervous.

Well, I totally forgot it now. What was it that was so important? Alice's phone buzzed on the table, startling me for a moment and then my memory jogged back to my phone in the car, Hayden's messages piling up by the minute. Ah, yes. Damn. She pressed one button, set it down and then focused all of her attention on me once again, waiting.

"Well, I wanted to actually talk to you about Hayden."

She said nothing; just nodded and waited. I felt nervous talking about my boyfriend in front of her for some reason and took a huge gulp of my drink, noticing how her eyes glanced at my lips as I did so and then lowered quickly.

"He told me he loved me last night."

She chewed hard on her chicken. "Do you love him?"

I didn't answer at first and just sat there, holding my fork loosely in my hand and when she raised her dark eyes under her brow to meet mine, I knew the answer and finally said it out loud.

"No. I don't."

Her expression stayed the same but she stopped eating, pushed her plate away and leaned against the back of the booth. "Why not?"

I thought for a moment, racking through my memories with him and couldn't find anything that made me not love him. Sure, his protectiveness and anger issues were problems and issues but they weren't deal breakers. So instead, I just shrugged, sighed, and crossed my arms over my chest. "I don't know. I just don't." She didn't say anything and I knew that she could tell I wanted to say more but she wasn't going to press on it.

I gave in and opened up. "There are no tingles. No racing heartbeat. I don't miss him when I'm not around him. I don't…think it's super cute when he sends me these lovey-dovey messages. In fact, they annoy the shit out of me."

She softly giggled and I paused to listen to the noise once again, and then continued. "I just know that I don't. And I know he loves me. I just…I don't know what to do." I fiddled with my fork in my salad for a moment. "I bet this all just sounds really stupid to you, doesn't it? Stupid melodramatic high school shit?"

She shook her head and leaned forward, her elbows on the table. "Actually, no. I care about what goes on in your life, Bella. I don't just want to be a teacher to you."

For some reason, that statement aroused a strange grip on my throat and I fought to not show my reaction.

"I also want to be a friend to you. Kids these days sometimes aren't close to their parents and your friends, well, they listen and give their opinions on it but sometimes it's not the best advice, you know? So I do want to be here for you."

I nodded but didn't know what to say. Thankfully, she continued.

"What options do you think you have? With Hayden?"

I sighed heavily and felt her looking at me while I ran a hand through my hair. "Well, I could break up with him now and he would hate me with a passion for the rest of the year and it would be awkward at school. Or I could stay with him until graduation. Or I could stay with him longer than that and see if I feel anything for him down the road."

"Obviously you've thought about this. I don't want to damage your relationship with him and suggest you break up with him nor do I want to say you should stay with him and be miserable. If it was me, though, I would try and give it a little longer. Don't lie and say you love him if you don't but maybe something will happen."

Honestly, I was sure she was going to tell me to end it with him when I first started rambling. I wasn't expecting to feel such powerful dread to her answer, though. I think I wanted someone to tell me to break up with him to make it easier and Alice, naturally, did the thing I wasn't expecting her to do once again.

"And believe me, Bella. You'll know when you fall in love. The tingles, the racing heartbeats are all there. Even the momentary confusion because they're so close to you," she said softly, nodding as she played with her drink.

The silence between us felt heavy and again, that tense energy was radiating off both of us. "Have you ever been in love?"

She took a sip out of her drink and licked her lips again, momentarily distracting me and then I quickly zoned back in, afraid I would miss her answer.

"At the time, I thought I was in love but now…I don't think so."

"Who was he?"

She sighed as if she didn't necessarily want to talk about it and I had a feeling that she still had some feelings for him. "He was a guy I dated in high school and we got pretty serious. I was actually engaged to him before he went off for Iraq. His name was Jasper."

Normally, I would've been annoyed with any guy who was romantically connected with her but for some reason; he didn't seem to bug me.

She continued before I could respond. "We talked about me waiting for him but…I just didn't want to."

"Why not?"

"I knew he wasn't it, you know? I mean, I did love him but I knew that I was going to be happy spending the rest of my life with him, not jubilant, exceedingly delirious with bliss." She paused and took a sip of her drink. "Also, I didn't feel anything when our eyes met for the first time." At this, she raised her dark eyes to meet mine and I felt nervous under her gaze.

"You actually believe in love at first sight?"

"Yes, I really do. I don't think that you meet each other's eyes and then run across flowers, jump into each other's arms and kiss, though. That's just ludicrous. But I do think that in that moment, you realize that you were meant to be together and every corresponding event afterwards just proved to the fact that before you were incomplete and now you are whole."

My heart swelled at her romantic words and I wanted to stay in this booth with her for hours, debating life and everything just so I could listen to her perfect voice and look into those smoldering eyes. Sadly, though, our time was running short and we'd have to return to the real world where she was a teacher and I was just her student, accompanied by an annoying boyfriend.

"Do you think it'll happen to you in your lifetime though?"

At this, she smiled as if I just reminded her of an inside joke. "I think it already has. I'm just waiting for the other person to wake up and realize it. Plus…there are some other issues in the way." She didn't meet my eyes and instead, gathered our leftover food and left me wondering what she meant. I desperately wanted to talk to her more about it and who this mystery fellow was but she just stood with our trays and tossed me the keys to her car.

"I'll be out in a second. Don't get in the driver's seat, honey," she said and then turned to me, her head slightly downward and a smirk on her lips. For some reason, the sight made me throb again. I recognized it now. That's how I usually felt when Hayden would kiss my sweet spot or would touch me the right way. I clenched the keys tighter in my hand. My god.

I darted my eyes towards her, focusing on her eyes while she put the leftover food in the trash and then lowered them to her lips. Why did I feel the sudden urgency—no, need to rush over and kiss her? My throat felt dry and I abruptly tore my eyes away to exit the restaurant.

No. No. No. No!

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"How you feeling, girl?" I asked Angela as I sat on the edge of her bed. She was currently blowing her nose, loudly and a disgusting noise followed which made me cringe. She saw my facial expression out of the corner of her eye and laughed lightly.

"I feel awful. There was this girl who has the flu at my Dad's work who came in, got him sick and now he got me sick. Next time I visit him at work, I am leaving a note with some heated words on her desk."

I smiled, knowing Angela could never be that mean. "No. No, you won't."

She paused. "Yeah, probably not." She laughed again and the noise felt strange compared to hearing Alice's laugh so much hours before. I tensed at the thought of her, reminded about the intense feelings I thought while looking at her and tried to shake it off and focus on my sick best friend.

"Well, I just wanted to check on you. I actually brought you some soup. Do you want some of it now?"

She shook her head quickly and I pretended to be offended. "You love my cooking!"

"No, Bells. It's just I have had so much soup over the course of today. I'm scared that the next time I blow my nose, soup will soak the tissue."

I cringed again at the image and then sighed and patted the stacks of books near her hip. "Is this gift better then?"

"Oh, yes. So much better. Thank you," she replied sarcastically and I chuckled.

"I should probably get going then because I have so much homework myself, girl. I hope you feel better."

"Oh, God. Me too," she whimpered out, her voice fighting against her and sounding hoarse.

I leaned forward and kissed her forehead and then whispered, "I love you" against it to which she replied quickly and earnestly "I love you, too".

"Next time, I'll bring Megan Fox as a gift," I joked as I walked to the door and she laughed, but then ending up coughing.

"She'd make me feel a million times better," I heard Angela remark on my way out the door and couldn't help but laugh.

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I'm writing the tiniest of hints as to how Alice acts and what she says in relation to how she feels about Bella. Let me know if you pick up on them. ;-)