Author's Notes: Anyone reading this knows that Nickelodeon owns the rights to Big Time Rush, right? I just like to play chess with the boys, moving them around as I see fit.
So one night I was at the mall and heard a song that sounded like something out of a 50's diner. I suddenly had a vision of Kendall and James as rival gang leaders and it wouldn't leave me alone. The final product is quite a bit different than my original vision, but it was inspired by both Grease and Back to the Future, two fabulous movies that take me back to my childhood because I have such great memories of watching them with friends and family. If you haven't seen them, you really should.
Dedication on this one goes to PromiseMeTheStars because she is such a cheerleader and kept pushing me to continue it after I'd decided to give up on it. She's still bugging me with "Did you write anymore of your story? :D" Aranelle did the same thing, and I love them both for encouraging me when I thought this story had no place to go. Turns out it had two different places to go, but at least everyone will end up happy. I think. Because they always do in my world.
Gleechild gave me the push to start this in the first place, and she's already helped me with two scenes in this story just from her reviews alone. KEEP REVIEWING ME, SHARON. YOU'RE WRITING THIS WITH ME. Aranelle made a pact with me—we agreed that if she'd write her Kendall/James gangster fic, I'd write this one. She made good on her end of the bargain, so I had to follow through. AND YOU SHOULD ALL GO READ HER FIC BECAUSE I LOVE IT AND I LOVE HER AND IT'S JUST SO GOOD IT MADE ME CRY. It's titled "Call Me a Sinner, Call Me a Saint."
It takes them the better part of the night to dig through the rubble, even though most of the surface debris has been cleared away. Katie keeps a lookout while the four work through to the basement level, each of them equipped with a flashlight since James apparently stockpiles them in his car. Part of Logan is amazed that these new friends are so willing to give up a night of sleep to get scraped up for him, but then he remembers who he's dealing with and knows that of course they would do this—as he would for them. Even in the past, they are a force to be reckoned with.
James pulls him aside during a quick break, and Kendall watches them go with suspicious eyes but Logan calls back "Trust me!" and finally Kendall nods. James has been quiet during the night and Logan knows there's something on his mind, so he prepares himself as they sit near the fence, keeping Katie in view. "What's up?" he asks.
"Those pictures in your wallet. There were a couple of four guys."
Logan nods, heart sinking. He still doesn't know how to explain that.
"The Jason guy, he was there, but the other two..."
"Yeah."
"I'm not crazy, right? Did Kendall notice it, too?"
"Kendall hasn't seen the pictures. Well, he might have, but I didn't show him and he didn't bring it up."
"But it's them. It's us. All of us. How is that possible, Logan?"
"I honestly don't know. I came from a time when we were all together, best friends, and I showed up here to find all of you again. I don't know how that's possible or how we can all exist in two time periods. We even have the same names."
"No, his name is-"
"James."
"So you are a liar then," James teases, but there's no malice behind it.
Logan chuckles. "His name is James Diamond and he's been my friend since I was a little kid. All of you have. Well, they have."
"But you're not here now."
"I was. Kendall said I died, but you guys used to play with me."
James' eyes widen as it comes together. "Logan! Logan Mitchell! Oh man, we used to play together all the time! You were always telling us to be careful, not climb so high in the trees, but when we went up, you'd usually follow. I was so sad when you died."
"How did I...?"
"He didn't tell you? Kendall?"
"I didn't ask. He didn't even remember my name, so I figured you guys weren't all that close to him. Me, I mean."
"We only got a few months with you, but...you yelled at Kendall when he called me stupid once. I guess after that I felt pretty close to you. You um...got really sick. Some kind of flu or something. I went to see you right before, and you barely recognized me. Made me sad."
"I'm sorry."
"Don't be," James laughs. "You were dying, it's natural. But I'm happy to know you uh...lived on in some way. And that uh..."
"We ended up together?"
James nods. "I kind of feel guilty thinking that way."
"Why?"
"I don't know."
"It's because of Kendall. Because you love him."
"You know something? I really wish I didn't."
"No, you don't."
"I do, Logan. It makes things hard. The past three years have been hell because I see him every day and I remember that fear on his face, I remember him telling me not to ever do that again."
"Was he disgusted when you kissed him? Did he push you away?"
"No, he just...was so shocked. And scared. I'll never forget that, how scared he looked. I hated that I did that to him, that I put him in that position. I didn't know how else to tell him, though, I couldn't find the words."
"Maybe you should try again, now that he's grown up some. Gotten a little more used to the idea."
"Yeah, right. He'd punch me this time."
"What if he didn't? What if he kissed you back?"
"He won't."
"Has he had girlfriends, James? Any at all?"
James shrugs. "Doesn't mean anything."
"Have you?"
"Doesn't matter."
"I think it does. I think he made a mistake that day and he knows it. I think he picks fights with you because it's better than not talking to you at all."
"So what am I like in the future?" James asks, changing the subject.
"You're ridiculous. Argumentative. Full of yourself. You love to look in mirrors and show off your body. Which is impressive, so I guess I get that."
"All that and you still love me?"
"You're also beautiful, and kind to those you care about, always there for your friends, a lot of fun to hang out with, and you get me out of my shell. You keep me on my toes, James. When I spend too much time wrapped up in my books, you drag me out to a movie or the pool. Even take me shopping, try to buy me 'better' clothes, because you hate what I wear. We spend a lot of time helping each other."
"In what way?"
"When one of us gets in a jam, the other is always there. It's like that with the four of us, really, but you and me...it's different. Special."
"And me and Kendall, there's no feelings between us?"
"You guys are best buddies, or at least you were until you and I fell for each other."
"Uh oh. Sounds like Kendall's jealous."
Logan shakes his head. "It's not like that. Now I see what that would look like, if he had feelings for one of us, but it's more...he feels lost. He had a girlfriend and they had to break up and he took it really hard. Needed me to be there for him and I was, but mostly I was all about you. That was hard for him. And you made it worse by making sure there was no doubt who I belonged to."
James shrugs. "Can't blame me."
"I guess not. The thing is, I never knew for sure you wanted me like that. I know it now, and I don't know how I doubted it, but...see, that's why I have to get home. I have to tell you, James. Have to let you know before it's too late."
"So we're not together?"
"Not yet. I plan to fix that the second I get home."
James grins slowly. "Let's get your ass home, then. I'm waiting for you."
"You'd better be." Logan reaches out to hug James, who hugs him back.
"Time to get back to work, boys. Now."
"Kendall, I'm not going to steal him away! Give us a break here!" Logan stands up, pulling James with him.
"No more breaks. Next time I might find you two kissing again."
"What's the matter, Knight? Jealous?"
"Hell yes, I'm jealous!" Kendall steps up to James without warning, pulling his face down for a kiss.
Logan's mouth drops but then he's grinning. "About time," he whispers, and then his mind starts fighting it; all he sees is Kendall kissing James, and even though they belong together, anyone else kissing James is a sight he never wants to see again. I've gotta get home. Jesus, James, please be there when I do. Please let me get home, God, please. The panic takes hold and he backs away, suddenly desperate to get to the time machine. Please God, please!
"Hey guys! Think I found something!"
Carlos' voice has Logan running. Sure enough, the top of the phone booth is visible through a cleared-away patch in the dirt. "That's it, that's it, guys, come on!"
Katie rushes over. "You found it? Let me see!"
"Nothing to see yet, Katie. Help me dig away more rubble."
"Where are the guys?" she asks.
Logan glances back toward the fence to see them in each others' arms, lips moving as they talk quietly. "They'll be here soon. And I think you'll be seeing a lot more of James from now on."
"It's about time! Kiss him, Kendall!"
Logan shushes her. "We still have to be quiet. Now help us."
The less he sees of Kendall kissing James, the better.
The sun is just peeking over the hills when they lower Logan into the machine. Having been underground, it was spared complete destruction, but there is enough debris inside to make it difficult to maneuver. He passes up what he can to free up some space, then finally gets a look around at everything. "Unbelievable," he says in awe.
"What? What's wrong?" James asks.
"Nothing. I mean, there's a little damage, but I think it'll actually work. How is that possible?" Logan plays with a few switches, and when they respond he knows the truth of the situation—none of this is real. He's in a coma or a dream or something of that nature because there's no way in hell it could survive a wrecking ball this well, and it's the only explanation for why his friends exist in the past as well as the future. Now all he has to do is get it going and hopefully he'll wake up back at the Palm Woods, or even in a hospital bed, he doesn't care as long as James is there to greet him, his James with the messy hair and silly need to be constantly reassured that he looks good.
"So it works?" Kendall calls down.
"I'm not sure. I think it will." Logan looks up at the four faces staring down at him, a twinge of sadness in his chest even though he's smiling; he's going to miss these people so much, even after just two days. Then again, he'll never again take his own version of them for granted.
"You're not just...leaving, are you?" James asks, his voice a little sad as well.
A part of Logan melts. "Not just yet. You got a screwdriver?"
"I do," Kendall offers, tossing it down. "What?" he asks when they all stare at him. "I came prepared."
After tightening some things and banging on a few others, Logan nods. "I think she's good to go. I can't believe it." And yet he can, because this is all in his head.
"You'd better come back up to say goodbye before taking off," Katie says.
"I will. Help me up?"
The guys pull him out and dust him off some. "What if it doesn't work?" Logan worries.
"Then you're stuck here with us," Carlos answers. "Which would be kind of neat, we make a pretty good team."
"We do," Logan grins. "And you're all gonna be friends after I leave, right? No more fighting between the two of you?"
Kendall slides an arm around James' waist and James leans into him. "Can't guarantee we won't ever fight, James is pretty ridiculous."
"I'm ridiculous? Who spied on me every night but couldn't even admit that he missed me?"
"You're both ridiculous," Katie comments. "Don't worry, Logan, I'll keep them in line."
"And I'll help," Carlos adds. "Me and my lady will make sure they play nice."
Logan nods. "Okay. I think I can leave here with a clear conscience then. Kendall?" When Logan holds out a hand, Kendall rolls his eyes and pulls him into a tight hug.
"What if you don't make it?" he asks softly.
"Then I don't make it. As long as I get to say my goodbyes to James first, I'll be okay with that."
"I hate that we won't know," Kendall says, stepping back. "So in the future, you can't look me up and tell me you made it okay? Hopefully I'm still alive."
"It's...hard to explain, but no. I can't."
"Am I dead?"
"No, just...trust me. I can't tell you I made it okay. You wouldn't remember any of this."
"Not sure how I could forget, but if you say so."
"Where's my hug?" Katie demands.
"Right here, kiddo. And you, I would have been lost without. Thank you for being so suspicious and figuring it out. I would've been floundering for weeks trying to do this on my own." Logan hugs her and kisses the side of her head.
"Ew, cooties! But um, yeah. You're lucky to have me."
"I know it," Logan chuckles. "Carlitos?"
"My mom calls me that. Please don't call me that."
"I'm gonna call you that," Kendall grins wickedly. "That is now my nickname for you."
"Shut it, Knight," Carlos answers good-naturedly.
"Can I hug you this time?" Logan asks.
"Sure, it's just us. And I give great hugs." Carlos wraps Logan up and Logan smiles; Kendall gives the best, but Carlos is a close second.
"So glad I got to meet you."
"Me too. If we hadn't, who knows if these two knuckleheads would've ever got together."
"Exactly." Logan turns to James, who has been staring silently at him through all of this, and sees that once again, James is about to cry. Why am I always making him cry?
"Hey. Come over here a minute."
Kendall lets him go and James follows Logan into the shadows of a small shed. "You gonna be okay?" Logan asks, taking his hand.
"Yeah, I just...you're lucky; you're going back to me. I'm losing you for good. Again. And I know I have Kendall, and Kendall's all I want, but..."
When Logan steps in to hug him, James holds him so tight he can hardly breathe. "I'm gonna miss you. I can't wait to get back to my guy, but I kind of fell for you, too. Which makes sense, considering you're him."
"I wish we'd had more time together."
"It's best that we didn't, James. Trust me. You and Kendall would have continued to fight and made it worse, and now you have him. Finally, you have him back. I know you want that."
"I do. When he kissed me, I thought I was dreaming for a minute. I was so afraid for it to stop, thought I might wake up."
The light in James' eyes makes Logan smile. "It was no dream." Though that may be a lie, since Logan is dreaming all this anyway. "He's been going crazy without you, just like you have without him. This is how it's meant to be."
"I know," James nods. "Do you think if...maybe if you'd lived..."
"It's not even worth thinking about, James. I died. I'm gone, and Kendall will take care of you. Always. It's what he does best, takes care of us. And you're the one he loves. In fact, I bet if you look over my shoulder right now, he's watching us. Terrified I'm gonna kiss you again."
James does look, then laughs. "He's crazy."
"He's in love. And so are you. Now go make sure he knows that."
James hesitates, though. "I still don't want you to leave. I really like you a lot."
And Logan's tried, he's been resisting it for Kendall's sake, but when James says that, he can no longer hold back. He turns James away from Kendall's eyes and backs him up against the wall of the shed, pressing him into it and kissing him the way he wanted to kiss him the night before at the drive-in, breaking Kendall's rule about tongue and just going for it. James hesitates for a few seconds, probably feeling guilty about Kendall, but upon realizing this is his only chance to ever kiss Logan again, he gives in and returns it with a passion to match Logan's. Logan's hands go into James' hair and James' hands slide down to pull Logan tighter against him, and for one long minute there's no Kendall, no other James, just the two of them locked in the the idea of what might have been had Logan not died as a child in this time. For once they aren't interrupted, and when Logan finally steps back he knows for sure that he needs to leave, the sooner the better—mostly because he needs to do this with his own James, but also because if he doesn't leave, he won't be able to keep his hands off this James, and Kendall would most likely murder him before too long.
"I won't forget you," James whispers.
Logan nods. "I know. I won't, either. You take care of Kendall, okay?"
"For sure. And you take care of me."
That bright smile takes over James' face, and once again Logan is hit with homesickness for his own James. "No doubt. I really need to go."
"Yeah." James pulls him in for a quick hug. "I wish we knew somehow if you made it. Like Kendall said."
"I know, but there's no way."
"Okay. Oh, before I forget!" James reaches into his jacket pocket and comes out with a red and white tube. "Give this to him. Well, to me."
"What is it?" Logan tries to read it but the darkness makes it difficult.
"Trust me. If he's me, he'll know what to do with it. He needs the help."
Logan laughs, assuming it's some kind of hair product. "I'll make sure he gets it." One more kiss because he can't seem to help himself, and when he tries to pull back James holds his face there a while longer.
"Okay, I think I can let you go now." James nods, stepping away.
"I'll do my best to make you happy in the future. If that makes any sense."
"I have no doubt you will. Now go back there and tell him, make sure he knows how you feel. If he's anything like me, he won't be able to resist you."
"I'm pretty sure he feels the same, but if he doesn't, got any tips on how I can win him over?"
"Tell him he looks good. All the time. Make sure he knows you appreciate his smarts, too; he knows he's not the brightest guy, and feels inadequate a lot more than he probably lets on. One of the things I love most about you is that you don't make me feel stupid, no matter how smart you are. And make him feel needed. Let him buy you the clothes, let him fix up your hair. Then he'll want to show you off and tell everyone you're his. And change out of that outfit as soon as you can," James frowns, referring to the clothing Logan had thrown back on before coming out here.
"I think I can handle all that," Logan smiles.
"Hey guys, someone's coming! I think the construction crew's about to show up!" Katie calls over, back in her position as lookout.
Logan is surprised at how much brighter it's gotten in the last five minutes. "If I'm gonna do this today, I need to go now."
"Come on."
They rush back to the others. Logan takes one more look at all of them as Katie runs up to give him another hug. "I'm mad that I didn't get to ask you about the future, but I hope you make it, buddy."
"Sorry about that, I would've told you everything if there was time. Thank you all so much. I'm gonna miss you guys."
They lower him down into the booth, his heart pounding; even if this is just a dream, he has no idea what he'll wake up to, or even if he'll wake up at all. Please God, get me back to James. To all of them, but James. I need James.
"Tell your mom I said thanks for everything!"
"I will," Kendall calls down, arm securely around James' waist again. "Now get out of here before someone else shows up."
As Logan presses the buttons that will hopefully take him home, his looks up to find James, and the last thing he sees before darkness takes over are those beautiful hazel eyes filled with love for him.
