Okay, so after deep meditation and consideration, I bring you Chapter 8! If you've never played the game, you might want to look online for pictures of obstacles and characters for full enjoyment of this chapter. For those of you who have played it, this chapter is for you!

AdenaWolf and FireZenzizenzizenzic: I can't really tell if you were like 0_0 because you liked it or thought it was weird, so lemme know.

SuperMarioKyle: Thanks! You should check out my sister's fanfic, "This Means War!" Another funny Star Wars fanfic

Ayy Kaim: Yeah…about that. I had a couple of requests for Mace to pwn. In order to please everybody, I wrote this chapter. I'm sure you'll love it! Okay, so, without further ado: DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN THE PHRASE "KIT CAN NEVER BE PWNED. IT BELONGS TO AYY KAIM THE AWESOME."

AaylaKit: Yep, like I told Ayy Kaim, I got some requests for Mace to pwn the dance floor. Sorry for the mental image. XD Read this chapter for some more epic pwning! You won't be disappointed.

Michelle Erika: I'm an avid Mario fan, but I'm embarrassed to admit that I've never played Super Mario Bros. Wii. Sounds ideal for a chapter, though, so I'll Google it and learn what I can and see if I can write one on it.

Random-fan803: Glad you liked the quote! You can thank LadySaxophone for that one. Sorry about the detail thing. I'll work on details more in this chapter. And be sure to get back to me on the whole "Love/Hate Mace" thing. XD

LadySaxophone: Thank you! I enjoy writing this fanfic as much as you guys love reading it! And that's the thing about Mace. Some love him, some hate him. Not very many are in between. And thank YOU for the awesome idea! It was epic and it worked so well! :D

Fudgefeather: Thanks for the review! I've never heard of Okami before. I know, I probably shouldn't call myself a gamer considering I haven't heard of half the epic-awesome games out there. But hearing the word flutesaber makes me want to look into it. Sounds hilarious!

Endor Solo: Glad you like it.


Everyone gaped at Mace like he was from an undiscovered planet. Now that the song was over, the Jedi Master seemed unsure of what to do. Pwning the dance floor was no small feat, and had perhaps cost him his respect and dignity for the rest of his life. At last, after a long, awkward pause, he said sternly, "Tell anyone about what you witnessed today, and I'll personally have you removed from the Order. Got it?"

Anakin raised an eyebrow. "Like you've got the power to kick Yoda off the Council."

"Just set up the next game, Skywalker. I can tell that you have something else in mind." He took an irritated step back. Everyone could tell, however, that Mace Windu was feeling sheepish.

"As a matter of fact, I do," Anakin said, covertly sliding the camera back into his robes. He would post it on the HoloNet later. The galaxy had to see the most serious of Jedi Masters break-dancing on a DDR mat. It just had to happen. "Who's up for a game of WIPEOUT?"

"No way," Kit said. "I'm not playing that."

"Why not?" Anakin tilted his head to one side. "I thought you liked games like this."

"The game is stupid. I want to do the real thing!"

"You would," Obi-Wan said, shaking his head.

"No, seriously. Sign me up for a real game of Wipeout. I'd pwn every time."

"Then this should be too easy for you," Anakin said, popping a disc into the Wii for the eighth time that day. "Four can play. Who's up?"

Kit sighed reluctantly. "Well, I guess I'll endure." Yoda held out an expectant hand, taking a Wii Remote and Nunchuck. Obi-Wan and Mace exchanged glances, silently wondering which one would be convinced—name, forced—to join the game.

Anakin, as if reading their minds, grinned. "You two can alternate. Considering Mace just pwned the dance floor, I say that Obi-Wan should go first."

The Jedi Master groaned, but eventually complied and took the controllers.

"Good. Everyone choose your characters. I've unlocked everyone, so you have a wide variety," Anakin said. Yoda, of course, chose the Grasshopper, a character dressed in a karate uniform. "That fits you," Anakin said, nodding approvingly. "Obi-Wan?" Obi-Wan shook his head, indicating that he didn't care in the slightest which character represented him. Anakin chose the Runaway Groom for his former mentor, a small man dressed in a tux. "This should 'suit' you just fine, Master!" Obi-Wan rolled his eyes at the lame pun. Anakin, still laughing, turned to the Nautolan standing next to him. "Kit?"

"Whatever, dude," he said.

"You need to choose someone—" Anakin began.

"No, seriously. I choose 'Whatever, Dude.' He's right there, under Medium." Sure enough, a chill character with messy hair, shorts, and a t-shirt grinned back at them.

"Oh." Anakin smiled. "Alright. Whatever, Dude, it is. I'll go with John Henson, the commentator. Right, let's get started," he added now that everyone was ready.

The game loaded, showing a guy dressed in a big red ball dancing next to the word LOADING. "Master Yoda, why are you dancing to that ball?" Obi-Wan demanded, shocked. Yoda was indeed copying the ball's down-kick movement.

Anakin looked at the ancient Jedi Master strangely, then danced alongside him. "That looks like fun!" he said, smirking.

Obi-Wan began to protest. "Anakin—!"

"If you can't beat 'em, join 'em!" the Jedi Knight replied. "Come on, Master! You KNOW you want to!"

"No, thanks," Obi-Wan said, taking a step back. "You realize that the game is finished loading, right?" Anakin and Yoda stopped dancing. "Can we get a move on?"

"Of course. I wouldn't want to deprive you of this super-amazing game, Master Kenobi," Anakin said cheekily, setting them up on the easiest mode. "I figured you beginners would like to start off easy."

Yoda raised an eyebrow. "Pwn you all, I will," he said.

Kit laughed. "I think we've just been challenged, Anakin."

Anakin nodded. "It appears we have. I'm Player 1."

"You're always Player 1," Obi-Wan objected.

"Well, considering we already chose our characters, it looks like I'm already Player 1. So I'm up first."

The first obstacle was the Dirty Balls. There were several small red balls floating in a pool of mud; all the character had to do was jump from one to the next, all the way to the other side. Anakin leapt from one to the other with ease, finally landing to safety. Kit made it as well, a couple of seconds faster than Anakin.

"Easy, that was," Yoda said as the Grasshopper jumped from the last Dirty Ball to the platform.

Obi-Wan's expression creased in concentration as his avatar leapt from the starting platform to the first ball. He jumped right over it and into the mud with a splat. The commentators jumped on the Jedi Master's lack of skills faster than the character had disappeared into the mud.

"Ha!" Anakin pointed at his former mentor with a look of pure triumph. "No Beginner's Luck for you, my friend." Obi-Wan frowned and concentrated harder as the character, dripping with mud, appeared on the beginning platform once more.

After failing two more times, a picture of Obi-Wan's character appeared on the screen next to the word WIPEOUT! Obi-Wan sighed in frustration, thinking, At least I didn't have to do THAT again. It appears that they have a "Mercy Rule" in this game.

Another obstacle, one of Anakin's personal favorites (for the name, of course), was the Sucker Punch. The four Jedi had to make their way past a wall of punching fists, bent on knocking them into the mud.

"More mud," Obi-Wan said, trying not to gape at the impossibility of this game. "Wonderful."

Anakin slid across the small platform adjacent to the wall, somehow getting across without getting hit once. "Years of practice," he said in response to the shocked expressions from Mace and Obi-Wan.

Kit, as was customary, pwned the Sucker Punch faster than Anakin. "How do you like that, Gaming Master?"

Anakin feigned dead-seriousness. "Your skills are superior—for now—but can you win the war, Kit Fisto?" he said in a dramatic warrior-voice.

"Looks like the Big Balls and the Cheesesweeper will have to answer that," Kit said.

"Oh no, my friend, it is not the qualifying rounds that will determine our fates. It is the Wipeout Zone that will—"

"Knock it off, you two! Mace is trying to make it across the Sucker Punch! Key word: trying," Aayla said.

Mace had indeed replaced Obi-Wan, who had obviously had enough. The avatar was knocked into the mud for the third and final time, leaving the commentators laughing and the avatar pictured next to the word WIPEOUT once again.


"Pwned the Big Balls, I have," Yoda said smugly as the Grasshopper leapt to the other side.

"That's what she said," Anakin muttered in Kit's ear.

Kit chuckled. "It takes 'em to pwn 'em."

Mace rolled his eyes at Obi-Wan. "Really," he muttered, "we're surrounded by immature padawans."

"Heard that, I did!" Yoda said disapprovingly.

"So you heard me, but you completely missed Skywalker and Fisto's perverted jokes." Mace was getting annoyed. Perhaps it was the mere fact that he was being pwned by everyone in the room.

Everyone ignored Mace except Yoda, who flashed him the death stare. Despite the interruption, the game progressed. They made it past the Bullseye Buoy, the Cheesesweeper, and many other complexly simple obstacles. At last, they emerged into the Wipeout Zone. Kit was first place, Yoda second, Anakin third, and Mace/Obi-Wan fourth.

"You're up, Master!" Anakin said. Fourth place always did the Wipeout Zone first.

"Lovely." The Wipeout Zone consisted of five obstacles: The Barrel Run, the Gears of Doom, the Scary-Go-Round, the Piston Punch, and the Launch Pads. Obi-Wan wasn't very confident about any of them.

The Runaway Groom was launched into the water. He emerged onto the platform and started running up the ramp. He was doing pretty well until the first barrel started rolling toward him. It knocked him over and rolled over him, leaving him lying on the platform, trying to get up. Obi-Wan shook the Wii remote vigorously, trying to get his character to stand up. Soon, he climbed up to the next platform and stood victoriously.

"I don't know if I can beat that," Anakin said, feigning fear. "Your turn, Master Yoda!"

Yoda jumped over barrels expertly, soon making it to the top. Anakin was hit with a ball and knocked into the water. He glared at the source—Kit—and attempted to run up the ramp again. This time, there were no interruptions. Kit, of course, pwned them all by leaping over barrels and pulling himself up in record time.

The next obstacle was the Gears of Doom. The rotating "gears" tripped Obi-Wan, Anakin, and Yoda up a bit, but Kit made it to the other side without difficulty. Obi-Wan was wiped out, but Yoda and Anakin made it across on the second attempt.

The third obstacle, the Scary-Go-Round, sent Obi-Wan flying into the water, compliments of three balls attacking his character. He glared at his companions. "Thanks," he mumbled.

Anakin smirked. "It was my idea."

"Naturally." Obi-Wan never made it to the next platform. Yoda, however, attacked the Scary-Go-Round with ease. Anakin barely made it, and Kit, as always, showed them all up.

"Master Fisto," Anakin said as Obi-Wan set himself up for the Piston Punch, "how come I've never seen you play this before?"

"I told you; the game is stupid. If I can pwn at the real thing, then this is a walk in the park."

The final obstacle was the Launch Pads, a series of "trampolines" that the Jedi were required to leap across. Obi-Wan jumped from one to the next, finally finding his niche. Yoda beat him by a few seconds. Anakin's avatar jumped so far that he leaped over the first Launch Pad and into the water below. He did this a second time as well, but finally made it on the third attempt. Kit jumped from one Launch Pad to another, emerging victoriously—and predictably—to the other side, claiming the championship.

"That was fun," Anakin said. The final standings were Kit, Yoda, Anakin, Obi-Wan.

"Tune in next time, everyone!" Kit said in a commentator's voice. "Good night, and Big Balls!"


Disclaimer: I do not own WIPEOUT: The Game