Guys. Seriously. I just cannot thank you enough for all the amazing reviews I've been getting. They make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside, just like chocolate...or champagne...or a kiss from Edward Cullen! Gee, isn't life beautiful? Anyway, to be back on track, I know that some of you are like, "Okay. Seriously. Where in the hell is the plot line to this story?" And I promise it's coming. Really. I just feel that in By Moonlight I got to the punchline way too quickly for my (and for that matter, anyone's) liking, and I kind of want to get all my fluff and giddiness out in this first part, because I can just promise you this: there won't be much room for that in the second part! That's all I'm saying. But, then again, I guess I can give you the title of the second part, because I know it won't give anything away-I hope:

"Home"

If you think you know how the second part of the story will go, then visit my profile page and send me a PM, and I will, undoubtedly, reply to you! I love getting notes from my readers, and I will be more than ecstatic to send you something back. I don't know...maybe a sneak peak of the next chapter...(grins evilly). So I'll leave you with that, and then you can get into the next chapter, where I PROMISE the actual stuff will be starting!


It had been about a two and a half months since the Carnival Incident, which I had mentally been calling it ever since. My ruined, absolutely horrid night had ended up turning into something blissful: an event I had not allowed myself to count on the moment we stepped into Lauren's car. Of course, that's why Edward was so peculiarly special. He was able to turn my most miserable moment into one I would remember for the rest of my life.

In a good way.

Even though we weren't going steady-yet, I barely allowed myself to think the hope-filled word-I truly do like Edward. He makes me happy when I'm around him, and I'm pretty certain that he enjoys my company as well. We're not too deep or serious with each other, and neither of us feel the need to criticize the other every waking moment. And, aside from the exterior perfection, he's a real person. An exceptional person, actually. He's clever, witty, and intelligent, and actually puts some thought into his words before they leave his mouth. It's good, I think, for me to have someone I can actually talk to without having to explain myself or dumb my words down so they can understand.

But, of course, there isthat feeling of inferiority whenever I'm around him. But then again, who wouldn't feel excruciatingly plain next to a Greek god such as himself? His rock-hard, unbelievably nice body, his unruly, autumn-like hair...not to mention his mesmerizing green eyes. It's become increasingly difficult, I've found, to restrain myself from wanting more than I can have.

Even as I feel whatever it is between us constantly building, I find myself questioning our actual relationship. What exactly are we? We're more than friends, certainly, but would I go as far as to say that we're together? I don't believe I would.

And, after all, I was far from being certain about anything. How did I even know he wanted something like that between us? How could I assume that he even did had those sorts of feelings for me? Of course, I knew that he liked me. The cute, small gestures or compliments would surely justify that. But did he want something more than that?

Did I want something more than that?

Never in my life before had I felt this way about anyone. After all, it had been difficult when all you had to choose from is the group of twenty-odd males your age from a population of about a hundred and twenty that you had spent your life growing up with. The emotion that surged through me every time I was around Edward was electrifying, yet foreign. I couldn't quite put a name to the strange sort of current, and I was scared.

Did I even have something to be afraid of?

And, even so, was this normal? Did everyone, at one point in their life, go through a confusing stage such as this? I mean, I doubt the majority of them had a chance to meet and develop a relationship with a drop-dead gorgeous man that should be living in some sort of heaven. But, even, so, was this all part of the plan? Was it some kind of rite of passage that I had to go through, where I was faced with some sort of difficult romance problem that I had to solve?

If so, life was so extremely unfair. I mean, why can't everything be absolutely perfect? Like in a fairytale, or a romance novel. After everything in the entire book happens, the beautiful woman (I snorted, not even trying to put myself into that category) always ended up with the handsome knight in shining armor. So, why couldn't all lives be like that? But, then again, that led me back to my previous question:

What king of relationship, exactly, did Edward and I share?

I growled, beyond frustrated at this complex state of confusion.

I decided that this new loss of my sanity was probably based on the fact that I hadn't really stepped out of the confines of my home in the last week or so, and I concluded that I absolutely had to get out. The same old walls and rooms were driving me crazy.

I didn't even pause to think of where I would go, or where I even could go. I just needed to be anywhere but here. Anywhere where I wouldn't be surrounded by annoying little brothers, or embarrassing fathers, or anxious mothers waiting for me to just get married and have some friends that didn't have four legs and lived outside in our barn.

No. I needed to get away from that.

"Mother! I'm going out!" I called quickly in the general direction of upstairs, sliding my coat on. The fall-almost-winter weather was getting to be especially biting nowadays, and everyone in town had been preparing like it a blizzard would arrive in a matter of days.

"Oh. Sure, dear. Enjoy yourself."

The surprised, yet unmoved voice of my mother was all it took for me to sprint out the door, into the chilly air.

I jogged quickly down the street, although there was no rush and nowhere special I was heading to. My hot breath was coming out in billowy clouds, and I could feel my cheeks and nose starting to turn red from the cold air. It was a surprisingly nice sensation; a change from the unchanging, uneventful past few days.

It was good, I think, for me to get some shocking cold into my body. I had felt numb, as if my thoughts were slowly making my entire being senseless. This icy feeling was like being woken from a dream by a pail of freezing water. It was definitely something I needed, and it almost caused me to smile as I walked on through the chilly air.

I walked on down the street, not pausing for anything whatsoever, my previous thoughts still buzzing around in my head like a confusing whirlwind. And, before I knew it, I found that my subconscious had been leading me towards the one place I had never gone in years:

Marty's Malt Shop.

Marty McLinton was a childhood best friend of my father's, as they had spent their first eighteen years growing up next to each other. I'd heard the story about a million times, of how Charlie and Marty were absolutely inseparable and were, undoubtedly, the troublemakers of 1922 Arlington.

It was inevitable, however, that the two best friends would have to grow up sometime, and so they did. While my father decided to lay low with his love, the wild girl of the town, Renee, and marry her into the simple farm life (which eventually led to the making of Larry, me, and etcetera), Marty decided that, if he couldn't be a kid, surround himself with them.

And surround himself he did.

Marty's Malt Shop was an instant success in this small town, and eventually was designated as "The Couples' Hangout". Even so, I'd spent a good part of my early life here with my silly, hair-brained Uncle Marty, drinking an endless supply of chocolate malts, in which I'd always find an extra cherry or two, courtesy of said uncle.

But I hadn't been here in years. After all, life got busy and I grew up. There were baby sisters to attend to, cows to milk, books to be learned. There was no way I could keep living in that chocolate-cherry-malt dream world, no matter how much I longed for a way I could.

The sweet, reminiscent tinkle of the bells that hung on the entrance door sent a tingly current through me. Looking around, I could see that the place hadn't changed a bit since I'd last been here. Old, red leather bar stools, a beat-up jukebox, chipping blue paint: it was all exactly how I left it so many years ago. And, in a way, that made me happy. As if there was something I could count on, even when so many changes, it seemed, were taking place.

I walked up hesitantly to the age-old bar, sitting quietly on one of the red stools. No one was behind the bar, so I just waited silently.

Looking around the room, I saw that the majority of the people here were my age, and (obviously, living in such a small town as this) most were people I knew: Lauretta Haywood, a quiet but quirky girl a year younger than me, with Woody Lamont, a skinny red-haired boy who'd won a special science award a few towns over. And then there was Ava Vernell and Robbie Rolando, a couple that had been going steady since practically grade school, and were said to have already made marriage arrangements.

Looking at all these happy couples reminded me of my frustrating predicament with Edward. I sighed, burying my head in my arms. I was ready to just go back to my deep thinking when I heard it.

"Hey, lady, you okay?"

My head shot up when I heard the high soprano voice so startlingly close to me. Rubbing my eyes, I found that the voice belonged to a small, auburn-haired girl in pigtails with a huge lollipop in hand. She was in a pink frilly party dress, and was staring with a look of concern on her tiny freckled face. She looked to be about nine years old.

"Um...excuse me?" I blinked a few times, looking over my shoulder to see if she was actually talking to me.

She rolled her eyes and sat down in the stool across from me. "Oh, please. I could so tell that there was something up with you the moment I looked over and saw a girl burying her head in her arms. With no beau, I might add." She looked smugly at me, as if she already knew the answer of what I would say.

Who was this girl? And who was she to just waltz up to me and demand to know about my personal life? I looked incredulously at this four-foot-five sprig of sarcasm, who was apparently getting frustrated with my lack of response.

"Well, what's wrong then?"

Her hands were folded expertly, like a doctor waiting for someone to tell them their symptoms.

I cocked an eyebrow, still stunned that this was even happening. "Well, I don't even really know you." There, I thought happily. This, most definitely, would get her. Hopefully she would just leave now and leave me to my own mind, which had much business to attend to. I started to turn back to the bar before I heard her speak again.

"Goldy Harrods, at your service." She grinned widely and stuck her tiny hand out expectantly.

Bemused, I met her hand with my own. "Er...Bella."

"Great!" She exclaimed, flipping one of her bouncy auburn pigtails out of her eyes. "Now we know each other. So will you please just tell me what's bothering you? I promise I won't tell anyone, not even my cat, Howard, if that makes you feel better." Big, green eyes stared at me innocently, waiting patiently.

I sighed. What have I got to lose? It was only some little girl-how could telling her this one problem of mine possibly do anything against me? Besides, it might be good for me to get everything off my chest. "Well...okay." I swiveled my chair around so I was facing her completely. "So, there's this boy..."

"A boy?" She grinned.

I smiled wider, her enthusiasm rubbing off on me. "Okay, so boy isn't even close to what he is. More like, a god of a man." I paused, and she giggled. "He is sohandsome. He's tall, and has strong arms, and has these beautiful green eyes that make you want to faint from ecstasy every time you look at them. And, not to mention, he's a soldier."

Goldy raised her eyebrows. "A soldier?"

I nodded. "Yes. And not only a soldier, he's the soldier. One of the Lieutenant Generals of the entire army." I sighed, knowing that this was just another item to add to my exponentially growing list of "Reasons Why Bella Swan Does Not Belong With Edward Cullen In That Way". I mean, this was just getting too unfair.

Realization had dawned on her face. "You mean Edward Cullen?"

I frowned, nodding. How did Goldy know his name? "Exactly. Do you know him?"

She shook her head. "No, I don't. But I always hear my older sister talking about him. She says he's absolutely dreamy." She giggled, these cute little dimples appearing on her freckled face as her grin stretched even wider.

My smile returned. "And your sister is right. He is dreamy. And I think he likes me, too."

"Then what's the problem?"

I sighed. This was the hard part. I considered saying to her, 'Oh, never mind. It's just some dumb stuff. I'm probably just being too over-sensitive', but I stopped myself. After all, had I not already agreed to tell her what my real problem was? "Well, I think he likes me, but I don't know if he likes me like that. I mean, how can I know if he even wants to be in a romantic relationship with me? He can have any girl he wants. Why would he choose me?"

She frowned. "Why wouldn't he choose you?"

My eyebrows furrowed. "Well, I mean, look at me. I'm beyond plain." I held up one of my long, brown curls. "I'm not rich. And, I'm practically a social outcast." I paused, and when I saw she was about to intercede, I held up a finger. "Wait. I'm not done. I live on a farm, I have nine people in my family, I have to argue to the world's end with Mr. Sentry just to get some lousy oil, and I'm probably the clumsiest person on the planet." I sighed. "Why would he choose me over someone like Lauren Mallory?" The name came out of my mouth like venom, and I slumped my shoulders in defeat.

"Wait up. Who's this Lauren Mallory? And how did this all start? Come on, if you want me to help you, you have to start from the beginning." She pursed her lips, one small eyebrow arched knowingly.

And so I told her. I explained everything, right from the moment when I saw the soldiers and thought of my brother, Larry, to when I first saw Edward's piercing green eyes, to when I saw him at dinner that night in Benetti's Ballroom. Goldy listened carefully, laughing at the part where I chucked a wine glass at Lauren's brand new white dress, and "aw"ed at the part where Edward asked me to dinner. I had to spit the details through my teeth about the Carnival Incident, and sighed when I finally told her about my happy ending with Edward on the ferris wheel.

"And so, that's pretty much it for the last few months. I mean, it's all basically the same. I've spent a lot of my time with Edward, but even so I can't figure out his feelings for me." I paused, thinking for a moment. "Actually, I don't even think I can figure out my feelings for him."

For a few moments, we were both quiet. Goldy had a contemplative expression on her face that almost made me laugh. Here I was, explaining my innermost feelings to a girl who couldn't be more than ten years old.

When she finally spoke, she stunned me. "Do you love him?"

"What?" My voice came out half-strangled.

"I said, do you love him? I mean, this guy obviously has feelings for you. And don't even try to convince me otherwise. I doubt you're more than half of those things you said about yourself. So who cares if you live on a farm, or you have a big family, or you're not rolling in money? You're drop-dead beautiful, Bella, on the inside and out, and I can tell that you really have a heart. Which is more, obviously, than I can say for this Lauren girl. So my only question is: Do you love him?"

Love.

It was a strange word, beyond something I ever could even dream to achieve in my life. After all, I had always expected to be alone, in one way or another. Of course, I would marry: there was no doubt about that. I needed to support my family, and by staying by myself for my own purely selfish reasons would cause an eternity of guilt within me. And so I had always planned to marry, to be what my family needed me to be, but I never expected to find love.

Even so, I suppose I had always subconsciously been searching for the foreign word. I knew, obviously, that there was a slim chance that I would ever find it somewhere in this small, provincial town, but part of me had always been in a dreamland. I guess my absurd amount of reading lent itself to that idea, and so I had always been waiting for love to find me; whether I knew it or not.

But the question was: Had I already found it?

When I thought of Edward, my blood boiled and my heart beat increased dramatically, as if some kind of strange electricity was running through my entire being. My skin tingled even with the slightest of his touches, and the mere sight of him sent my insides into a frenzy. But love?

"I...I don't know." I whispered. "I'm not even sure what love is..."

Goldy sighed. "Love is like..." She looked down at her lollipop, which was now almost fully consumed. "Eating candy. Except, a jillion times better. Your insides get all squishy with happiness, and you think that nothing in the world could ever make you feel happier than you are at that moment. You can't stop smiling, and if you were to eliminate it from the world, life would mean close to nothing." She thought for a moment, and then nodded, as if content with her analysis.

And, the more I thought about it, the more clearer it became.

I was insanely happy whenever I was around him, so much that I don't think anything in my life could ever compare. Nothing, not the worst mood ever in the history of the universe or even Lauren Mallory, can keep me from grinning in his presence. And, of course, a world without Edward would mean nothing at all (I shuddered to even consider the fact). And then I realized:

I was, undeniably, unconditionally, irreversibly, in love with Edward Cullen.

A grin spread across my face. "I really am," I marveled, my voice barely above a soft whisper. "I truly am in love." And then, louder. "Me. In love!" Until, finally, I was practically shouting. "BELLA SWAN IS IN LOVE!"

Someone, Lauretta Haywood, was clapping enthusiastically, while Ava Vernell giggled into Robbie's arm.

I realized, with a tremendous blush, that the entire place was dead quiet as they watched me standing on the small red stool, arms stretched out victoriously. "Oh." I muttered, getting down as unnoticeably as I could (which was to no avail; everyone was already staring anyway). "Sorry, guys. Please get back to your meal."

Goldy was grinning at me, as if nothing too peculiar had happened. "See? I told you! Now, what are you going to do?" she looked at me expectantly, still smiling.

Suddenly, I was confused. "Um...do?"

"Yes, do! Come on."

I pursed my lips, thinking frantically. What the hell was I supposed to do? "Um...actually, Goldy, I wasn't really planning on doing anything. Should I be?" I frowned, looking down in my lap.

I heard her scoff, and I looked up to see her rolling her eyes at me. "Obviously Bella! You can't just think that you're going to do nothing after you just realized that you love the man of your dreams! Now, come on, what are you going to do?" She was now standing, her hands perched stubbornly on her hips as she awaited my answer.

"Well...I guess I'll go home and tell my mother..."

"You're mother? Bella, you are a magnificent grown woman who has just had a brilliant epiphany, and the first thing you think about is the fact that you're going to go home and tell your mother? Try again."

I bit my lip. "Um...my best friend?"

She shook her head.

"Okay. I don't know. What am I supposed to do?"

Goldy through her hands up in the air dramatically, muttering to herself something about teenage romance nowadays. "Argh!" she paused, dropping her arms to look at me. She took a deep breath before finally responding. "Okay, Bella. Here's what you're going to do. You are going to march out of here like you won a thousand dollars, and go right to Edward Cullen. You are going to profess your undying love to him, and he is going to sweep you off your feet and you will be married and I won't have to come to you ever again to fix a romance problem, because you two will be living happily ever after."

"Right." I said, not really understanding, but deciding that 'right' would be my best answer choice.

She grinned. "So what are you still here for? Go find your lover boy!"

I laughed, overcome with so much joy I couldn't hold it in. I stood up and grabbed Goldy into a huge hug, lifting her off the floor. She squealed, bursting into a fit of giggles as I twirled her around, and finally I put her down. "Thank you so much, Goldy Harrods! You will never know how much you've helped me! I will forever be in debt to you."

She shook her head, smiling at me, and said softly, "Oh no. You, Isabella Marie Swan, are truly one of a kind."

I smiled once more at her and twirled around, running towards the door. My mind and heart were in a frenzied state of ecstasy, like I'd just drunken a whole barrel of warm wine. Though I was unbelievably excited to go and tell Edward, something stopped me. How did Goldy know my full name? I definitely didn't tell her...I turned around. "Hey, how did you know-"

But Goldy Harrods was no where in sight.

..........................................................

I ran, once more, down the street in the biting, sub-zero November air, though this time I wasn't uncertain or hesitant about anything. My face was plastered in a huge grin as I struggled to sprint in my long, heavy winter skirts. I was even colder this time around, however, as it was nearing evening and I had, in my haste, forgotten my coat in Marty's Shop (this wasn't a big deal; I could always go back later to get it).

And it suddenly occurred to me that I had absolutely no idea where Edward was.

I stopped dead in my tracks, pursing my lips thoughtfully. Where to find him...I sighed, realizing that my mind was beyond imagining or thinking anything past the point of "I love Edward". My luck, thank goodness, was with me though today and I was able to spot a man in a brown soldier's uniform.

I quickly ran up to him. "Excuse me, sir, but would you be able to tell me where Edward Cullen is?"

The man was tall and intimidating with dark skin, but that initial first impression wore off once his face broke out into a huge, toothy grin. "Why, hello little missus. What'd you say you was lookin' for?" He shook his head. "I'm sorry. I have a hearin' problem...Yep. Ever since them nasty Germans took my right ear off...I'm sorry. What was you say'n?"

I smiled. "I was looking for Edward Cullen." I said it louder, so as to ensure that there would be no problem hearing it.

Comprehension dawned on his face. "Ah! You is lookin' for the General! I dunno, but I thinks he'd be at the office, seein' as he told me he had some busy-ness to attend to." I grinned as he gave me the address, and was about to go off when he frowned. "But I'd be careful if I was you, missus. Nothing gets between the General and his busy-ness."

I quickly thanked him, rushing off towards where I was directed to go.

Something about the man's dark tone alarmed me, something about the way he said that nothing could get between Edward and his "business" freaked me out. But I shook it off. After all, I was just about the happiest girl in all of Illinois right now, and nothing, absolutely nothing, could dampen my mood.

When I finally arrived at the small, old building about ten minutes later, I was out of breath and positively jumping with apprehension. What would Edward do? Would he laugh? Cry? Would he take me into his arms and spin me around, "sweeping me off my feet" as Goldy predicted? I had absolutely no idea what would happen, and I felt like I would burst if I didn't get to talk to him anytime soon.

I tried to compose myself the best that I could, smoothing my surely wild hair down and straightening my rustled skirts. Even if it didn't matter to me now, I'm sure I would look back at this moment with dread if I let myself just burst through the door a crazed mess. And when I finally felt that I was as decent as I could possibly get, I reached for the door handle.

But, to my surprise, the door opened before I could even touch it.

There stood Edward, looking as breathtakingly beautiful as ever. He green eyes bore into mine, smoldering with intensity, as was also the same as always.

But there was something wrong. Odd. In place of the wonderful, gloriously angelic smile I had hoped to see, was a deep frown. His jaw was visibly clenched, and his brows were furrowed as if in deep concentration. His hair was especially distraught today, as if he had spent hours running his hands through it. The overall dark expression on his face scared me. And, when he finally spoke, all traces of my previous joviality were gone.

"Bella, we need to talk."


Sorry guys. Cliff hangers are never fun, sometimes not even for the author. Okay, so maybe they're ALWAYS fun for the author, but whatever. And, I actually am dreading writing the next chapter of this! *tear tear*

Goldy Harrods is mine and you cannot have her!

So, remember, just hit that gorgeous little periwinkle button over there *eyes review button* because both you and I know that it loves to be touched. So, make it's wishes come true, because it REALLY wants to hit the 300 mark.