Author's note: Sorry for the wait, I had a number of things in my personal life blow up together. Lost my job and then my drivers' license. Had to jump through a lot of hoops to get everything back to normal, still looking for a new job.
In any case, I'm back with another chapter. Once again, I don't own Mass Effect.
The next morning, I awoke feeling much more myself and much less like a husk.
Well, morning is debatable. Since we're docked at the Citadel, and the Galactic Standard day lasts nearly 28 earth hours.
I exited my pod, stretching my sore muscles. During one particularly fulfilling stretch, a goodly portion of my vertebrae popped, flooding a sense of satisfaction, tinged with euphoria, through me.
I walked over to the mess, picking up some of the government issue food. I sat across from an engineer I recognized as one of the Draven sisters. Thus far, I had been unable to tell them apart. We nodded, and got to more serious business. That business being food.
As I finished, there came an announcement over the PA system.
Lieutenant Johnston, report to the conference room.
I sighed, and stood.
I've been expecting this ever since Wrex made his headlong rush.
The trip up the stairs was a quick one. Partly due to my penchant for planning out conversations ahead of time.
I'm sure she's going to ream me out for letting Wrex off the chain like that. but, but...
I arrived at the Conference/Comm room, and paused for a moment. I sighed and steeled myself, walking through the door.
Shepard was facing away from the door, leaning on the railing of the holographic projection equipment mounted against the wall, arms spread widely, head down.
I've only seen that posture a few times before, and it was someone weary of a lot of things, weighed down by disappointment.
I sighed again and cleared my throat to announce my presence. "You wanted to see me, Shepard?"
She straightened slightly at the sound, then relaxed again.
Her head came up and though she was looking at the wall, she addressed me.
"We need to talk about what happened with Wrex in the penthouse. I've already spoken with Wrex about it."
I nodded unconsciously, knowing she couldn't see. "I figured that would be the topic."
Shepard whirled, her striking eyes locking onto mine. "Did you know ahead of time that Wrex would go after Fist like that?" There was a steel in the words that hammered right into my guilt center.
"No...Yes." I cursed under my breath, averting my eyes. "Its complicated Shepard. I have trouble remembering things until I'm in the middle of them, and taking down Fist happened differently than I knew about."
I started pacing, not knowing what to do with my hands, alternating between rubbing my face with them, and wringing them at belt-level.
"Yes, I knew he would go after Fist, but I didn't think he'd go AWOL while we were still in combat."
I turned back to Shepard, raising my hands to the side. "How would you have stopped a full ton of krogan you only met an hour before?"
Shepard's stance had softened slightly, but still held some steel.
Not like she ever really relaxes much anyway. That can't be healthy.
"You have a point, but I can't have you holding back on any intel."
That tensed up my shoulders, "Shepard, how much do you really think I know? I know how things go in a more or less static timeline. If I keep giving heads up, and too many things change, I'm going to lose the ability to predict the big stuff. On top of that, if we get into something that I haven't seen before, all bets are off. And another thing, I don't remember everything all the time. I'm only human, and I'm starting to forget things too, the longer I'm here."
Shepard looked taken aback. Like no one had ever called her on asking the impossible before. Maybe no one had.
"Shepard, not all of us are you, who can do six impossible things before breakfast. Sure, I'm pretty amazing in my own way, but I'm not a god. " I paused, "You said before that you trust me. Do you really think that I would willingly hold something vital back? If so, I might as well resign my commission right now and get off this ship." I sank back against the wall, suddenly tired again. I honestly wanted to help as much as possible, and it hurt to be doubted. It hurt a lot.
Shepard composed herself, and with a thoughtful expression, looked at my face for a moment.
She sighed, lowering her eyes "One thing I have noticed about you, Doc, is your sense of loyalty."
She paused, obviously thinking, a rueful smirk on her face. "You're right, I wasn't aware of the limitations you were working under. But be that as it may, you still had command over a squad-member who disobeyed orders. It's your job to ensure that your commands are followed, and that didn't happen. I'm honestly not sure I could have done any better. However, I must lay a disciplinary action. It won't go on your record, but I'll be assigning you additional duty in the armory, maintaining our weapons alongside the Chief."
"I understand, ma'am."
Shepard grimaced at the formal tone, but let it slide. "Now while I've got your attention. I assume you've been thinking about Wrex, since you were expecting this conversation. Is that correct?"
I nodded.
"What can you tell me without compromising things? Take your time, I've cleared the next hour for the both of us. We're waiting on the assignment of the ship I'll be getting anyway."
I shrugged. "We're getting the Normandy for your ship, Anderson is stepping down."
I moved to the nearest chair and sat. My eyes unfocused.
Okay, what can I tell her? I suppose information on the crew isn't going to upset much, and if I avoid talking about the major details of the missions, since I can't predict the timing on those, I might be able to keep some of my knowledge intact enough to be there when it counts.
Think, think. Wrex...Tali...Liara, Oh, I need to tell her about Liara...Garrus...Kaidan...Ash...oh, Damn. The Virmire split. I need to warn her about that. But how can I do it without screwing the mission over?
"We're also going to get another crewmember, Her name is Dr Liara T'Soni. Daughter of Matriarch Benezia. She is trustworthy, and actually kind of endearingly innocent. Asari, so unconsciously sensual. Only just over a century old, which puts her comparatively just out of her teens for a human. Spent the last 50 years on archaeological digs in various places. Hasn't been in touch with her mother for nearly that long. Powerful biotic though. She can likely be found on Therum in the Artemis Tau Cluster, but I would confirm that."
I looked as Shepard shuffled her feet uncertainly.
"Wrex is one of the most levelheaded Krogan you'll ever meet. But he has a sense of honor and loyalty to his people that will override almost anything. Eventually, I can't give you the details, but you'll need to talk him down from something involving the Genophage."
Now Shepard didn't look uncertain, she looked alarmed.
I was quick to reassure her, "You can do it, just look at it from his point of view and you can talk him around if you point some things out to him. He is definitely someone who I would give my back to, once you prove to him that you won't stab him in the back. Get to know him, and I'm sure you'll see what I mean."
"Tali will always be a little withdrawn, but that's more out of shyness than anything that should be a concern. Amazing technician, very oriented towards helping the group rather than herself. Until now that's been the Flotilla, but most all of the crew, particularly the ground teams, will come to think of each other as family in some sense. And she'll be the little sister. Definitely has her head on straight."
"Garrus is a skilled combatant, VERY good sniper. A tad idealistic, but good man to have your back in a fight. He has good tactical sense, and can be a good leader if given the chance. Though he takes every shot fired at his team personally."
I thought a moment,
I'm not going to betray Ash's trust.
"Ash, well, she can be a bit of a hothead, but that's part of the charm. She is very loyal to the Alliance, despite some personal problems. Skilled soldier, deserves better than she's been given. Any more on that would need to come from her. I won't go into something that isn't mine to tell." I gave my commanding officer a hard look, letting her know I wouldn't deviate on this.
Shepard nodded, though I could almost see the resolution to talk to Ash forming behind her eyes. I looked at the ceiling of the room.
"Kaidan is put simply a Boy Scout. He sees things in a pure black and white that usually come down to drawing a line between Them and Us. As capable as he is, he tends to trust the Alliance overly much in my opinion. He sees a group as good or evil in its entirety, doesn't make allowances for individuals. But despite all that, he's like a big brother figure."
I had to look back at Shepard with a teasing glance. "I think he's stuck on a certain Alliance Commander, as well."
Shepard drew in a startled breath. I took in her expression with amusement. It wasn't often that Shepard was flustered.
"I..I'm not going to talk about that," she stuttered out.
I laughed, raising my hands in surrender. Then I sobered, and looked directly at Shepard.
"Shepard, there will come a time, when you are asked for an Alliance soldier to be put under another's command for the duration of a mission. I strongly urge you to send more than one person. If you don't, we WILL lose someone that day. You'll be forced to choose which of your people will die, and you'll have to make an impossible choice in order to get the mission done"
I stood and walked over to her, putting my hands on her shoulders, and staring into her eyes. I'm sure my own eyes were wide and shining, I blinked back some tears that were threatening to fall, and I heard a hitch in my voice as I said, "Please, Jane. If you never believe anything else I say, please take my word on that. Not only do I not want to lose anyone, I don't know if I could handle losing either of the people it would be. Watching you suffer through something like that would be the coup de grace. I would be worthless to you afterwards."
My obvious emotion and use of her first name definitely got her attention. Her eyes were surprised, yet solid.
This is why people follow her into Hell. She cares about them, but never lets them see the doubt.
Her voice came across the short distance, confident and reassuring, yet quite appropriate to the topic. "I'll take it seriously, Ben. If its got you this worked up, I'll do what I can."
I relaxed suddenly, letting my hands drop to my sides, and let out a self-deprecating chuckle.
"Sorry. When I get attached to people, it tends to be more or less instant. Makes for a bit of heartache at times, but I can't really help it."
Shepard's mouth quirked up into a teasing smirk. "Is that what happened with the Chief?"
That definitely broke the tension. I blushed, yet managed to fire back. "Pretty much, at least I had the guts to say something. Unlike a certain sentinel who tends to watch more than your back."
Shepard blushed herself.
"Anyway, If I think of anything more, I'll bring it to your attention. What I know stretches out over about 3 years or so. Some of it isn't relevant now, but will be later. But first, I wanted to let you know about a project I've been into the last couple of days."
Was Shepard interested? Or was she just wanting to avoid the topic of Kaidan?
"You know how the Normandy is supposed to be stealthy? I think I may have found a way around that. I figure if there's a loophole in our ship technology, we should know about it."
Shepard nodded at that and gestured that I should continue.
"I've been looking at some of the sensors used to calibrate the mass effect fields of the ship. They are used to detect the presence and strength of the field, so we can adjust it as needed, and I think that something similar could be used to detect the presence of a Mass Effect field at range."
Shepard's brow had furrowed, she wasn't seeing the connection.
"I think that stealth drive or not, we shouldn't count on being silent or undetectable. If I could detect the ship from within the same system, and I think I can, I would bet on the Reapers being able to do the same."
A pair of blue eyes narrowed. "I'll keep that in mind. You should put that in a report for the Alliance, once you have it all shined up and the bugs worked out. We might as well have our people knowing the limitations of our own tech."
"Aye, aye."
Shepard returned to at least semi-formality. "Anything further, Lieutenant?"
"No ma'am."
"Dismissed, I'll send the additional duty schedules to you by the end of the day."
I snapped a smirking salute, which Shepard rolled her eyes at, and left.
I made my way down to the Med Bay, My duties would likely be light today, even when Shepard sent me that duty schedule. The thought made me smile.
Like I mind spending some extra time with Ash.
I entered the Med Bay, and saw Tali already there, being checked out by Karin. The energetic quarian jumped a little at my entrance.
"Don't worry, its only me." I glanced at Karin. "How'd we do, boss?"
Karin glanced up from her scanner for half a second, "An excellent job, If I didn't know what to look for, I might miss that anything had happened." Her voice was approving as she moved back to her desk.
"Ms Zorah, you have a clean bill of health. If you need any refills on the antibiotics or other health supplies, please speak with me."
Tali slid off the diagnostic bed she had been sitting on, and turned to me. "I just wanted to thank you again."
"No problem, though I don't want to have to do it again unless absolutely necessary." I smiled, reassuringly I hoped, "Keep yourself safe."
I watched as Tali left the room, then turned back to Karin.
"How is the bay this morning, boss?"
"Quiet. Definitely how I prefer it, though you marines always manage to keep it from being boring." Her lips twitched at that last comment.
I shrugged, "Is it my fault that Shepard attracts trouble?" I couldn't help but smile as I said that.
"She's not the only one," Karin retorted. "Seriously? Impromptu surgery on a species you only met a few minutes before?"
Our banter simmered to a comfortable verbal poking match as the hours passed.
Sometime around lunchtime in my watch, the PA system crackled to life.
Shepard's voice came, loud and clear.
"This is Commander Shepard speaking,"
Both Karin and I looked upwards as the commander's voice continued.
"We have our orders, Find Saren before he finds the conduit. I won't lie to you crew, This mission isn't going to be easy.
For too long, our species has stood apart from the others. Now it's time for us to step up and do our part for the rest of the galaxy. Time to show them what humans are made of."
There was a slight pause, then:
"Our enemy knows we're coming. Saren's followers will be waiting for us. But we'll be ready for them too.
Humanity needs to do this, not just for our own sake, but for the sake of every other species in Citadel Space. Saren must be stopped, and I promise you all, we will stop him."
I looked at Karin, "Rousing speech. Looks like we'll be dealing with the shepherd of trouble for a while longer." I smiled again.
Karin rolled her eyes at my pun, ignoring its brilliance.
Moments later, I got a ping on my 'tool as a message was received.
Ah, my time allocation has arrived.
I glanced over the schedule I had been sent. For the next week, my off-duty time not devoted to sleeping would be taken up by armory duty.
I had another hour in the Med Bay, which I spent trying to work out the kinks in my distortion field detection sensor idea.
The field detection antennae won't be enough by themselves, they'll need a boost somehow. But what if we lock in a preset power profile for the engines, and monitor how the field for the whole ship changes by contact with other fields? That would turn the whole ship into one giant antenna for the field distortions, though they would still need to be extremely sensitive to pick up something at range...
My time came to an end, "My lady, I beg your pardon, but I must absent myself from your divine company. For duty calls me to serve elsewhere for the present time, though I shall be desolate for the separation."
Karin raised a brow at my extravagant phrasing, but chuckled. "Oh, get out of here you."
I grinned, and exited with a deep bow. "As you wish my lady."
The door closed with Karin brandishing a book at me.
I nodded at a couple of crewmen in the mess as I made my way to the elevator.
In the elevator, I paced a little bit.
The door opened in the cargo bay, and my eyes were drawn to the soldier at the armory table. Ash.
I walked over to her and said, "It seems I am assigned to be at the whim of a beautiful and deadly creature for some time. Not that I'm complaining." I said this last with a grin.
That conjured a half-smile from Ash. "You handled anything more than your rifle before?"
I raised a brow and said, "There is more than my rifle?", teasing.
Ash snorted, a distinctly unladylike sound, "More than you can possibly imagine."
I smirked, "I dunno, I can imagine quite a bit, your worship."
Ash rolled her eyes, "First Obi Wan, now Han?" she sounded slightly exasperated,
"Nerd." But her voice was not derisive.
"In all seriousness, I can handle your average weapon, its when it gets modded that I have trouble." I finally admitted.
Ash was a good teacher, knowledgable and patient. Over the next several hours, I learned a few tricks to modding, such as not to mix a certain turian piercing ammo mod with an asari scanner mod. (The results were not pretty, I ended up replacing the weapon and the scanner mod later.)
Once Ash explained it, it made perfect sense. That particular piercing mod tends to demand more wattage out of a scanner than the asari mod is rated for.
I took a longish shower, mostly to get rid of the smell of charred sensor coils, and went directly to my pod for the night.
The next day was much like the one before it, though with less equipment failure. I entertained myself in the spare moments by looking up the official records on Liara.
We had reached the Artemis Tau cluster within hours, thanks to the miracle of the Mass Relays, but we would be cruising at least a full day before we reached the target system.
Covering thousands of parsecs within hours, then taking days to go a few lightyears, go figure.
Though, traveling at speeds that cover a light year every 2 hours is pretty impressive.
Shepard called a meeting of the ground team to plan our incursion.
We were in the Comm/Conference room, all seated around the table that had extended out of the floor. Both Garrus and Wrex had some difficulty with their seats until yours truly tweaked them. Human designed seats were not exactly perfect fits for turians or krogan.
"We are approaching the Knossos system to locate and evaluate the loyalties of one Dr Liara T'soni, tenured Professor of Archaeology at the University of Serrice. Her specialty is Prothean studies, and her last known location was at a digsite about a thousand clicks from the capital city of Therum, Nova Yekaterinburg." Shepard paused for breath.
"Wow, Shepard, you got all that out in one breath? Good lungs." I snickered.
There was a rumble of chuckles around the room, from the deep basso of Wrex to the much higher pitched Tali.
Kaidan spoke up after the laughter had died down. "Commander, will we be encountering any environmental hazards?"
She nodded. "Therum is a largely hostile world, we'll be facing lava flows and the atmosphere is harsh but breathable."
"Lava flows?" The question came from Ash this time. "Will we have difficulty maneuvering?"
Shepard smiled, it was an excited grin with teeth bared. "May be a bit of a bumpy ride, but with the Mako, we shouldn't really have a problem."
I grunted, then turned to Kaidan, hopeful. "Please tell me the stories about her driving are only stories?"
Again Kaidan chuckled. "You'll have to wait and see, Doc."
I groaned and sank back into my seat.
Shepard gave me a 'you'll pay for that one' look, and forged on.
"The dig is only sparsely staffed, chances are there may only be 2-3 people present, but at the least they can point us in the direction of Dr. T'Soni."
Shepard turned to Garrus as his flanging voice was heard, "The Mako will fit 6, 5 if Wrex is one of them. Who is on the landing squad? Or were you wanting volunteers?"
She only hesitated a moment. "I want two groups, the primary team and a support and evac team. Vakarian I want you in charge of the evac team. Consider this a trial run for later. You'll have Alenko, Wrex and 2 other marines for support."
She turns to Ash, "I'll take Williams, Tali and Doc. I'll want one more. Alenko, Who would you recommend for a Demolitions expert?"
Kaidan grimaces, and lightly coughs into his fist. "Commander, our only demo expert aboard was Private Jenkins..."
I lost track of the conversation for a moment, remembering the desperate blue eyes, locking onto my own.
I'll never forget the moment when his eyes just went empty. I'm sure it'll feature in a few nightmares. The sudden absence of heartbeat.
I begin feeling the drag of despair, of guilt.
What could I have done differently? I should have been closer, I could have knocked him out of the way. I should have kept watch.
I began to whirl through the maelstrom of shame and self-recrimination.
I physically shook myself from the shoulders up, the old familiar gesture helping me regain focus. Shepard had turned towards me, an apology in her glorious eyes. I waved it off and said, "Its a digsite, right? Should be plenty of equipment to use if we need to. Both Tali and I can manage a minor explosive charge if necessary. Besides, I'm sure Ash can imitate a human wrecking ball if she wants to..." I grinned in Ash's direction, and she glared at me.
Point goes to Doc!
Shepard ignores our byplay, nodding. "Any further thoughts or questions?"
Garrus raises his head respectfully, "About this Dr T'Soni, do we know anything about her past history with her mother? Are they close, and how likely is she to be a hostile?"
I raise a finger, "I can answer that. Been doing some research on the good doctor. Seems she's barely older than a child by asari standards, and had a public falling out with her mother quite a while ago. That could be a ruse, but I don't think so. Unless Dr T'Soni is very talented at deception, she has not been in contact with her mother for several decades."
I chuckled a bit, "And from reading between the lines, I would have to guess that she is not used to lying."
Garrus's mandibles twitch, "Reading between the lines? I think my translator just dropped out."
Shepard waved him off, saying "He made an inference from what he read." She looks back at me, "How long a time did you say?"
"Roughly 50 years, well beyond Benezia's association with Saren."
Shepard nodded, "Then we'll hope for the best, and plan for the worst."
The PA system came on. "Hey, Commander, we just entered the Knossos system. ETA 5 minutes to orbit of Therum."
Shepard looked up at the ceiling, said "Roger Joker."
Turning to look at the squad, she said "You have your assignments, any further intel should be brought forward as it becomes available. Any questions?"
The ensuing silence was only broken by the pulse of the drive core.
Shepard nodded, "Dismissed."
