Truth Hurts
When Elrond left the examination room he felt weary despite that it wasn't even noon yet. He was on his way to his study to speak with the Lady. He was sure she waited for him, eager to learn what he learned. In front of the door to his study he stopped for a moment. His mind was still reeling and he needed to take a deep breath to compose himself. It was never wise to speak with Galadriel when distracted, even when she would never hold it against someone.
When he stepped into the room Galadriel was indeed waiting at the window. Probably observing his sons and their guest at the training ground which could be seen from his study. He had seen them on his way here.
"You are finished early," she said and studied his face. He wasn't sure what she saw and her expression betrayed nothing.
"Yes, in the end it was quite easy to find his elvish relatives. I even got a glimpse who might be his dwarven family but I can't focus enough to narrow it down enough," Elrond answered after he closed the door. For this conversation they needed no listeners. The Lady narrowed her eyes, sensing his attempt to avoid the inevitable.
"Tell me, who is the dwarf's father?" she asked, not leaving any way for delaying.
"It seems that my son met a dwarven woman in his lost period over sixty years ago," Elrond replied, his voice pained. He didn't want his son to remind this dreadful time but they couldn't avoid it. Galadriel's eyes widened in surprise and Elrond realized she really hadn't known. She, too, knew what it meant for her eldest grandchild and could understand Elrond's hesitation.
"Maybe this is the reason why Elladan liked Livon so fast," she finally said and sighed. "He hasn't let anyone near since it happened. His soul must have known the truth." Elrond nodded in agreement. He had wondered about that, too.
"When will you tell them?" Galadriel asked after some minutes of silence.
"When they're finished with their training. I will speak with Livon first, though," the elf lord replied. By now he stood next to Galadriel at the window and watched the training grounds. Livon was sparring with Elrohir at the moment, with Elladan observing them. This would be difficult for all of them and he didn't want to interrupt the carefree time they had. Not yet anyway.
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Livon's whole body ached, but he didn't mind. It was fun to spar with Elrohir, even if he stood no chance against him. Fortunately, the elf didn't hit him with all his power or he would be heavily bruised later on. He also noticed that, when he stopped thinking about his next moves, he fought more easily.
It was finally Elrohir who stopped their spar. With a small chuckle he threw the water-skin to the dwarf who drank thankfully. He hadn't noticed how thirsty he had become. When he turned around he saw the reason for the break: Lindir stood next to Elladan, waiting for them to be finished with their training. Livon's forgotten anxiety returned instantly. He walked towards the elf, giving Elrohir the skin when he walked by.
"Does Lord Elrond want to see me again?" he asked.
"Yes. He's waiting in his study for you. I'll escort you," Lindir replied and turned around and Livon followed. He was a bit surprised that Elrond wasn't in the examination room any more but didn't question the elf lord who walked in front of him. It as Lord Elrond's house, after all, and he could be everywhere he wished.
Soon enough, they arrived and Livon entered the bright room. Elrond stood at the window, watching the grounds but turned around when he heard the door open. He offered Livon a small smile and Livon's heart beat faster. Did he found relatives of him, after all?
"Please sit down, Livon," Elrond said and waved at a group of comfortable looking armchairs. But then, Livon hadn't found a single piece of furniture in this house that wasn't comfortable. He sat down and Elrond quickly followed, sitting opposite of him again but with more space between them as before in the examination room. He waited for the elf lord to continue.
"Before I tell you what I found I need to explain to you why Elladan was in the west when he found you," Elrond said and earned a puzzled look from Livon. What had Elladan's journey to do with his relatives? He didn't question Lord Elrond, though, realizing that he would learn the reason soon enough.
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Sixty-one years ago:
Elladan and Elrohir, along with a group of guards of Rivendell, had visited Círdan, the Shipwright, at the Grey Havens with a message from their father. The journey had been uneventful with just one small skirmish with orcs and when they arrived they were greeted warmly by Círdan. The bearded elf was always kind and welcoming to those he cherished and at least polite to those he did not. Of Elrond and his offspring, he was always fond of and thus the twins had made the errand willingly.
They stayed for a few days, sharing news of the world. When they finally rode out of Mithlond, as the Grey Havens were also called, they carried a return-message for their father. It was three days after they left, still following the Lhûn, that they were ambushed by a large band of orcs. Despite the surprising attack, the elves were able to push back the orcs and killed most of them. Some of them escaped, though, and when the small layer of snow settled again they noticed something amiss. Elladan was nowhere to be seen. A frantic search started but ten minutes later it was quite obvious that they wouldn't find Elrond's eldest son. The orcs must have kidnapped him for a reason no one knew. Orcs usually took no prisoners.
Dispatching one of his men to report to his father and another back to the Grey Havens, Elrohir refused to leave the Ered Luin. He would only leave when he found his brother. During the next two weeks the elves searched through the mountains without any sign of his brother. They found several groups of orcs and always questioned them about his brother's whereabouts but none of them could or would give him an answer. They only laughed at his misery.
Elrohir's despair grew with each passing day. He could remember the time his mother had been kidnapped – another action out of the ordinary – only too well. And how broken she had been when they had found her, miraculously still alive. She had decided to sail west though, rather to stay with her family. He only hoped Elladan wouldn't be as broken and hurt as their mother when they found him. If they found him alive, that is.
Three days later, they finally found him outside of the mountains. He looked dirty and disheveled. And the look in his eyes was filled with horror that send a chill through Elrohir's spine. His fears had become true. They had found him alive but in a state he'd never wished for anyone. Elladan seemed glad to see them, though. But when they asked him what happened he couldn't answer. He couldn't remember anything that happened in the past two and a half weeks. Even of the ambush they had been in he could only remember glimpses.
They returned to Imladris and met their father half way there. Elrond seemed glad to see Elladan alive but was as concerned as his youngest son about his health. Back at home he examined Elladan closely but couldn't find any source for his memory loss. His son must have forgotten what happened on purpose. He didn't want to remember. Something truly terrible must have happened to shock his usually brave son that much and Elrond didn't push. Elladan would come to him if he was ready to speak. He never did, though. And the memory gap wasn't the only thing he lost as he lost also his will to live, too. Only the pleading of his family let him stay alive and in Middle Earth. It was only a small comfort but they never gave up and in time Elladan got better, even just in small steps. It was a good sign, though.
"Since then, my son regularly travels to the Blue Mountains," Elrond finished his tale and fell silent. Livon could only gape at him in shock. Something this terrible happened to his savior? He couldn't imagine something like this happen to him and survive. Sure, on their journey to Rivendell he had felt that Elladan was sometimes very silent and sad but never had he imagined it was because of this. The elf hadn't seemed like he had such a horrible past. He felt even more grateful for the tall elf though he had no idea why it was relevant right now.
He stayed silent for several minutes, still thinking about what Elrond had told him but still waiting for the information about his family. When the elf lord hadn't found anything he would have say so by now, of that he was sure.
"It saddens me to hear that Elladan had to endure this," he said finally when Elrond didn't. "But I cannot see what this has to do with my family."
Elrond sighed and ran a hand over his hair. "We do not know for certain but I think when my son was captured at that time – by what foe I have no idea – that he wasn't alone. I strongly believe this enemy had captured also a woman. A dwarven woman." Livon stared at him while his mind worked hardly. Slowly the pieces of the puzzle found its match and he started to breath faster.
"He forced himself on her," he whispered and a single tear rolled down his cheek. He was sure the woman must've been his mother.
Elrond's eyes widened in surprise and shock. "Oh no, child, no. I know my son. He would never have done so. His capturers must have used a strong aphrodisiac or an evil spell. Elladan would never hurt an innocent on his own will," he hurried to say and Livon looked up into his eyes to see if this was his honest meaning. He could see no lie. "He will never forgive himself when he hears of this. You must believe me."
Livon continued to stare for a while before he nodded and looked rather guilty. He hadn't meant to blame his rescuer…his father. Father. He remembered when he looked into the mirror this morning. He couldn't see anything elvish like in his appearance. Apart from his too tall and too slender built for a dwarf.
"Are you sure?" he asked, his voice trembling. He needed to hear it out loud.
"Yes. The technique I used shows me the souls of the person's relatives. It showed me that your dwarvish relatives are still alive. But I need to know them to be able to tell you who they are," Elrond explained and shot him an apologetic look. "Sadly, I never met them, though they seem vaguely familiar. Not enough to narrow it down enough to find them." Livon nodded, not really understanding how it works but accepting the explanation. It seemed logical. "To my surprise there were some souls far nearer than the Blue Mountains. And as I know my family quite well it was easy from that point. It was quite a shock."
Livon studied the elf lord in front of him – his grandfather – any could only see true honesty. And a warmth he couldn't explain. It was very similar to the looks he gave to his sons. And that made no sense to him. Elrond barely knew him and just learned of their relationship. Surely he could not already love him?
"You must know, Livon, that children a rare, very rare in elfish society. They are more cherished than anything else and it doesn't matter how they look like or if they aren't fully elven. My grandfather had been a man but it does not matter to those I cherish. You are of my blood and a part of my son. I cannot not love you and my sons will feel the same," Elrond tried to reassure his newly-found grandchild. "After they overcame the shock, of course." A small smile flashed over Livon's face. "All we ask in return is that you allow us to be your family."
"What about my dwarven family? I don't think I can't simply give them up. They must be worried and I want to know them. Know who they are. Remember them again." The last was said in a whisper. He was still struggling with his lack of memories and now that he knew that there was a family back in the mountains, waiting for him, it was even harder.
"Of course you can't. And you won't be pushed to do so. I will instruct all the elves in my household to ask around if they are around dwarven settlements," Elrond vowed. "We will find them, no matter how long it takes." The young half-dwarf looked at him with watery eyes and nodded.
AN:Well, here's the next chapter. It is the first part of an emotional rollercoaster as Elrond still has to tell his son(s).
TMI Fairy, readergirl4985 & syeern: I couldn't resist to make a cliffhanger. Stories need sometimes a cliffy. And it wouldn't have fitted into the last chapter anyway as I try to not make each chapter too long or too varied in their lengths.
