Sesshomaru's Flower

A/N: Thanks for sticking with it guys, I know it can be hard because we're not used to seeing Sesshomaru like this! Also apologies if the ages are a little funky, obviously I need to work on my math – hopefully you guys can give me a mulligan on that. This is the last chapter, so thanks for reading the whole story, I hope you enjoyed it! Please don't forget to rate and review! :)

Disclaimer: Don't own InuYasha and co.


As years went by, Rin was now in her forties, but felt like she was seventy. She tried to keep up with Kazuma's energy and questions, but her energy was wavering substantially and she increasingly became worried about it. Sesshomaru still loved her, but wasn't attracted to her as he once used to be. She didn't have the same soft pale skin, smooth to the touch as she once did, as they were replaced with early wrinkles and creases. Sesshomaru sat in the hot spring with Rin, helping her into the springs, but afraid to touch her the wrong way. Though she did not feel youthful anymore, her love for him had only increased over the years and his continuing beauty made her feel lucky. She tried to get close to him, brushing her fingers up and down his wet body, he'd put his lips around her neck, breathing in her scent and threading his fingers through her hair. But as soon as he pulled away he saw nothing but sickness and pain in her and he was afraid to touch her again. He pulled away quickly and started to get out of the water. "What's wrong?" Rin asked concerned, reaching for his hand, following him out of the water. She quickly threw on her kimono so it was loosely draped on her while they were in the forest, a small chill in the air.

Sesshomaru looked back at her briefly, ashamed of what he did. "I love you, Rin." He paused, "Seeing you get older makes things difficult for me."

"You think it's not difficult for me too? I feel my death coming closer and closer and you don't even want to be near me when I need you the most. I know I'm not thin, and soft anymore. I know that I'm fragile but not in a good way. This shouldn't be happening to me yet, and I feel my days are shortening." She pleaded as her eyes started to water. He shook his head at himself and faced her directly, pulling her into his chest.

He sighed, "We both knew that your mortal life would hurt us both, but it's the journey…I'd rather 50 amazing years with you than a lifetime without you. You've made me into who I am today…" he started with an enlightening thought. Rin tried to smile but coughed instead, when he picked her up and carried her into their house.

As days went on, Rin found herself in the house more often, usually in bed sleeping or resting as she often didn't have the energy to do more than walk around. Sesshomaru was left to training and ultimately raising Kazuma, who tried to shelter him from being hurt of the inevitable. Sesshomaru was starting to feel like she had given up on life and felt no motivation to keep going, no goals. They knew being together forever would never be an option, this thought ate away at Rin even when she was a child, except now she was starting to get older and sicker than she ever thought she could be and knew that her beautiful demon partner would be forced to move on from her. What would he do after her? What could he do? Would he find a new wife or partner to spend the rest of his life with? These thoughts constantly roamed her mind and she knew that it was these questions that was making her sick of anxiety and depression.

However, Rin kept going as long as she could. She was in pain, day by day, but Sesshomaru sought help from priests and priestesses all over the country, paid for the best herbal medication available and it did help her, thought her quality of living decreased day by day. Kazuma grew up quickly. He was a man, what Rin imagined to be a younger version of Sesshomaru but with a little InuYasha in him too. His white hair grew long and had it tied back in a low ponytail and wore a casual kimono - Rin presumed it was to look more human. All she could see was Sesshomaru in him, and in her mind she cried of happiness.

"Mother?" Kazuma sat at Rin's bed side one morning, "I'm in love." He smiled gently and held her hand, stroking it gently.

Rin was barely able to open her eyes but she was able to smile and a tear trickled from her eyes. "How fantastic" she slurred and couldn't say much more than that because of her tears. She was at loss for words, truly happy for her son. She wanted nothing more than to be at Sesshomaru and Kazuma's side, but felt like she was being left behind because of her health. They spent a lot of time together, and she felt deep down that if Kazuma left to start a new life, Sesshomaru would wander away from her because he couldn't bear to be around her anymore. She couldn't see the things he was trying to do for her, but her depression got in the way and interpreted these gestures as obligation instead of love.

"Lord Sesshomaru." She choked out, her eyes closed.

"Rin?" He asked concerned from across the room. If it'd been ten years ago, he would have hugged her at that instant, but he didn't budge from his spot because she was so delicate and she made him nervous.

She continued keeping her eyes closed, feeling his presence but knew he did not move for her, "I need you to listen to me carefully," she said slowly, "I know you find me unattractive, and I'm dying younger than expected. I should have more years to my life but I don't. I am human, I am not like you and I can't stay young and beautiful forever like you." She paused and let out a hard cry, "Sesshomaru…" she paused again to take a deep breath, "next time I get really sick… don't help me. Just let me die."

He couldn't believe what he was hearing, "Stop saying things like this."

"Life isn't worth living any longer, especially when all of my hopes and dreams have come true. I have nothing left in my life that I need, except…" she paused again, but this time with Sesshomaru's genuine concern and interest, "your kiss and being in your arms, the moment I die…please. I need you." She pleaded. He was shocked about what he was hearing because she kept her depression inside of her, she never mentioned her feelings about her appearance and how she looked to him because she didn't feel it was her place – though he felt that he knew this already. When she didn't get a response, she followed up, "it's true though… isn't it?" she opened her eyes gently and turned from her bed to look at him.

He was in shock which she wasn't expecting. He went over to her side, with her head in his lap he stroked her black and grey hair, "why didn't you tell me any of this? Why did you keep it locked up? I love you Rin, it's your heart that I care for."

"But then, why don't you ever want to be near me?" she interrogated.

"I…" Sesshomaru started, but felt his tongue in knots suddenly.

She took a short breath, "just let me die. I think that when that demon that came to take my life and you revived me… I think it was my fate to have gone at that time. I feel like I'm living on borrowed time. I'm not well Sesshomaru, you know that. I can't live anymore, it's too painful."

Sesshomaru was upset to hear this and instead of being sympathetic became upset and angry, "I don't want you to die Rin. Without you, I don't know what I'd do! Kazuma needs you, I need you. So you're getting old, do you think I had not thought of that because you are a human? We knew what we were doing when you were younger. We knew that this was going to happen… just not so soon."

She looked up at him and saw the fear and worry in his eyes, "I just… can't… Lord Sesshomaru. I've come to terms with it. I can't take this pain anymore. I'm haunted at night of thoughts and fears about how I should have accepted my death much sooner. That demon spirit wants to take my life."

"You're stronger than that, Rin." He said stately.

Rin sighed nervously, "Have you not noticed my significant aging? Priestess Kagome and Lady Sango are years older than I am and yet they still have their years. I know that something wants my life."

Sesshomaru looked uptight for a moment, "She is a priestess and can ward these things off… And the demon slayer is very active in her duties…" he tried to excuse, though they weren't valid because Rin knew how to keep herself busy in her youth but caught on that Sesshomaru was just trying to be encouraging.

"The point is, my love, is that I'm ugly, sick and Kazuma is moving on… and I think you should too." She felt her heart tug on itself, making her groan softly because she had such a hard time letting go. He touched the side of her cheek, stroking softly up and down her face.

He looked down at her while she looked away, feeling unworthy, but he pulled her face to look back at him, "The point is, my love…" he started, "is that I love you more than life, I know I don't show it… I don't always know how. I've given you everything I could to prove that to you. I still think you're beautiful Rin, because I can feel your love and warmth. I have been nervous around you, and I haven't been able to find the right words to be able to talk with you lately. You know I'm not good at this. I'm afraid to hurt you."

She gave a very light smile and slowly started to get up. He tried to motion to use him as a clutch but she insisted on standing up herself and limped slowly out of the room, leaving him to his own thoughts.

Rin was tired of being a burden on everyone around her, that her illness was causing pain and concern for those trying to help her when she knew she could never be as happy as she once was, or be able to touch Sesshomaru the way she used to when she was younger. She stood leaning against a post on the veranda thinking of when she first met Sesshomaru and all the things he did for her as a child that helped her grow. She made an interesting note that though he helped shape her into a fine adult, she helped shape him too- to grow up emotionally. But she had lived her life to the fullest, she had experienced the things she wanted to, and felt everything she hoped. But now she felt emotions that she never wanted to feel, jealousy, envy, and depression. She was relieved that Sesshomaru opened up to her, it did make her feel a bit better about the situation but it didn't change anything because she knew her health was being depleted quickly. She couldn't help raise Kazuma nearly as much as she wanted, but she made every attempt to, but was pleased with the way he had turned out.

As Kazuma had been spending time with his new girlfriend he was spending less time at home, except when he was doing due diligence of checking on his mother. "How are you feeling today, mother? He asked.

Rin was delighted to see him walk into the kitchen one morning. She was feeling slightly more energetic than usual that day, having breakfast and trying to collect herself for the conversation she hoped to have with him. "Fine for now love, thank you. Listen, I just want you to know that I will always love you – no matter what. I am so proud of you." Annunciating on her pride of him.

"Yes mother, I know…" he laughed. But Rin continued to show a deep and serious look. He realized where the conversation was leading, and then went serious as well.

She pursed her lips, "Next time I'm sick, sweetheart…I'm not going to get better. I wanted you to know..."

"You always get better though mother." Kazuma tried to sound positive.

"Remember that demon spirit when you were younger? The curse… it is really taking effect on me, and I know I should be strong, but I can't be, so I am doing this for you. I'd rather see you be happy and living a very full life, while I get sick, than seeing you dead at my feet. I'd never forgive myself of being able to protect you further... I don't regret the decision your father and I made that day." Rin told him. Sesshomaru entered the room and sat down silently. Neither Kazuma nor Rin acknowledged Sesshomaru's presence to entering the room, as the family ate in silence.

"Mother, some more rice please?" Kazuma asked, breaking the silence moments later, as Rin reached for his bowl, and placed another helping of rice into it. Then she passed it back without saying anything. "Thank you."

The rest of the week was very silent between Rin and Sesshomaru. They said nothing to each other. Rin still was being stubborn, and Sesshomaru still thought she was better than the depressing darkness that was coming for her. That night had a very bright half-waning moon, breaking the night from total darkness. Rin, woke up in the middle of the night to look outside and see Sesshomaru's shadow in the distance. She drummed up enough energy to walk outside and she stood next to him.

Everything was quiet between them neither of them said a word, until Sesshomaru turned directly to Rin.

Rin tried to start, "Lord Ses-"

He kissed her. Her eyes were wide open at first, until she settled into the moment and closed her eyes, as well as deepened the kiss. When they released, they stared at each other. "I'm sorry… Lord Sesshomaru. I'm sorry for how I've been feeling lately. I never expected to feel like this, but I hope you'll forgive me. I love you so much, and I don't regret this life we've had together. I am honoured to have you with me."

"Only if you'll forgive me. I should not have ignored you the way I have." He told her. She smiled, and then he held her in his arms.

A few days later, she was sick again. Everyone knew that it was her desire to not get better again. Kazuma sat in her room at all times, making sure she was still managing, while Sesshomaru was getting water and anything else she needed. If she didn't want to get better, he wanted to make sure that she rested peacefully. He knew wishing for her to stay alive was a selfish thought, but knew that her soul would feel more at rest.

"Lord Sesshomaru." Rin said quietly; as he took her head, and tilted it up a bit so she could take a drink of water.

"You have called me lord all your life. You have no reason to call me a lord any longer. You will always be in my heart."

Rin gave him a slow distinguished look. "You'd think I'd forget?" She asked.

"No, but I am making sure." He told her, a slight smile to his face.

"Here, a gift, from my love. She made this for you." Kazuma came running in. He brought her a large silk purple pillow. "Sorry I had to leave, I just wanted to check up on her."

"Tell her… thank you." Rin said, tears going down her face. "I'm sorry that I will never get to meet her. I hope you are happy with her." She stopped and turned to Sesshomaru's direction who was placing the pillow Kazuma handed to her under her head. "Sesshomaru… please… talk to me. Tell me… everything that I never knew about you. I want to know…" Rin pleaded.

Kazuma left the room silently, feeling the tense emotions between his parents.

Sesshomaru looked at her. "Why?"

Rin looked away from him briefly. "You've never really told me about your deepest feelings, your longings…or even how you truly feel about things. Please…tell me. It's what I want to hear."

Sesshomaru continued looking at her. He didn't hesitate to tell her about significant times of his childhood, and then growing up as a teenager. He knew that this was the only thing he could do for his loving partner, the mother to his son… he owed this to her. For Rin, it was like listening to a fairy tale at a young age, she felt at peace.

When things got quiet, Kazuma entered in the room with InuYasha, Kagome, Sango, Miroku, and Shippou. Behind them were Kilala and Naomi.

Kagome got down at Rin's side. "oh.h.h…"

Rin looked over at Kagome, and then glanced over at Sesshomaru, "I told you Lord Sesshomaru, she is more beautiful then I…and she is older then I am."

"Rin… that's not true. It's because I have purification spells that I've practiced. We don't even have a significant age difference." Kagome tried to point out.

"I feel so ugly, sick and helpless. Everyone's come here because I want to die. They went out of their-"

"Oh cut the crap Rin." InuYasha blurted out, "You're not that bad looking for an old human. If Kagome didn't have her stupid spells, she'd be like you." InuYasha spat at her. Miroku and Sango collectively smacked the back of his head.

Rin couldn't help the sadness she felt, she didn't want to die, she felt like there was still so much she should have done even though she knew what had to be done.

Kagome touched her head softly, "You'll always be in Sesshomaru's heart, so it's not like you're going to be forgotten or anything. Not to mention, we all care for you very much…"

"It's true. Remember, when you were 14…and we had to explain to you what a period was?" Sango laughed gently. The others gave a soft laugh (except Kazuma who felt a little awkward but humbled by the recollection). Rin and Sesshomaru gave out a soft sigh.

"Or how you came to us telling us you were pregnant with Sesshomaru's baby." InuYasha spoke up. "Did you see our eyes?!"

They wanted Rin to be happy. They tried. They brought up the best memories. "Or when we helped you build this place. The funny races between InuYasha and Sesshomaru…like, who could dig faster, or dig the most in a half hour…" Miroku said.

Rin truly appreciated what her friends were trying to do, and she felt it working. Her heart's darkness had been lifted, she had just been reminded everything in her life that had been so grateful and how she had them to thank for.

"Or when I met you." Sesshomaru said quietly at her, stroking her hair softly.

"Thank you, I feel…so much happier." Rin tried to smile, breathing in the moment.

The other's all looked at her, with great happiness in them, and it made Rin feel like the luckiest person in the world. Her friends, people she cared for, people who cared for her, tried to help her leave the world in peace, with the love of her life at her side.

"Listen Rin…we want you to know that you're loved, and no matter how much you might tell yourself that you're not – you are." Shippou spoke.

"Not to mention, you've got Sesshomaru to love you. Especially when Sesshomaru despises humans." InuYasha said making an excellent point.

"That's true." Everyone else said, and this time Rin was able to laugh. But she and everyone else stopped, when her heart seized and her laugh turned into a cough. She reached her arm up to hold Sesshomaru's face in her hand while she looked up at him from his lap. Everyone was quiet.

"Lord Sesshomaru… I love you very much. Kazuma…" she looked at her son, and then the others, "thank y-" Rin whispered, her eyes closing… and her arm dropping to the floor.

The following moments felt so surreal to everyone in the room. Sesshomaru felt his ears ringing and everything was silent even though he could feel himself shouting "Rin?!" at her. He stopped and stared at her, bending over to put his face over hers. Kazuma ran over and leaned over his mother's body, crying and trying to hug her. The others stood shocked and instantly saddened, as Rin was special to them all too. Kagome, Sango and Shippou all cried, Miroku had silent tears, and though InuYasha rarely showed emotion by crying, he instead turned to Naomi and hugged her (who was receptive and respectful). Kilala brushed up against Sango making cooing sounds of comfort. Everyone was frozen in time for this moment of losing such a bright light in the world.

A week later, the group collectively buried Rin next to where InuYasha's mother had been – respectfully, as a family cemetery. After a couple of quiet nights with Kazuma in the house without Rin, Sesshomaru approached him outside, "I understand you're leaving to be with your woman in her village."

"Yes father."

"Have everything?"

"Yes father."

Then, with no further hesitation, Sesshomaru took out his Bakusaiga, and took a large swing directing at the house. Kazuma didn't realize his father was going to destroy their home, as he saw walls crashing down and everything ultimately destroyed. Kazuma couldn't help feel his heart break before Sesshomaru sheathed his sword and turned to face him again, "We will never forget your mother, but you and I will never come here again. We remember this place in our memories."

"Father…I will see you again, right?" Kazuma asked desperately.

Sesshomaru really tried hard to contain himself emotionally, "Of course. Good luck…my son. I am very proud of you."

Kazuma started walking off, when Sesshomaru looked down and realized something. He called out for Kazuma, who turned around and quickly came back.

"Father?"

"I want you to have this. I know you have someone to protect…guard it with your life, and it will guard you with its strength." Sesshomaru pulled the Tensaiga from his belt, and placed it in Kazuma's hands.

Kazuma was speechless but immediately showed gratitude by holding it out and bowing to him, "Thank you father…"

They never forgot the memory of Rin, frequently thinking of her and their home they once shared together.


Epilogue:

Kazuma lived happily with his new wife, where she completely accepted him as a half demon. They had 4 children together. His wife died at 53, where he still appeared young and full of life. He lived a very fulfilling life with his children. He finally had a chance to avenge his mother by slaying spirit demons and saving lives of others who felt that they deserved it. The children were all raised like humans though lived extended lives.

Sesshomaru wandered Japan alone one last time, but found no real purpose in life and knew things were different now. Sesshomaru made one last request from his younger half-brother… a battle to the death. He didn't tell InuYasha that his ulterior motive was to let InuYasha defeat him, as a sign of respect to his brother for a well fought battle, but ultimately, so he could see Rin again, and be at peace. InuYasha was proud of this accomplishment, but was saddened by his brother's death too, as even he came to respect his older brother.

InuYasha and the others lived full and happy lives. InuYasha who of course lived well after Kagome, however he didn't realize the toll Kagome's passing took on him and committed suicide. Naomi was much older; and was the heir to the Tetsusaiga and the fire-rat kimono. Kazuma eventually try to claim the sword from her, since he was more of a demon than she, but much like his own father- realized he was not the true heir, and he accepted this.


A/N:

Thanks again guys for sticking to the end. I'm so sorry I left it on such a sad note…can't help that death with humans is inevitable. I hope you all enjoyed this story regardless, and if you liked this story, please stay tuned for more stories by me.