Chapter Eight: Unexpected Visitors, Unexpected News

Ryan was awakened by knocks at the pool house doors. He groaned and rubbed his eyes, then moved off the bed and walked to the door. He figured it would just be Seth, dropping off his food and trying to think of more ways to cheer him up. He was surprised to see Sadie standing in front of him. "Hey." she said, nervously waiting for him to let her in ...or even say something back. "Uh, hey. Hi" Ryan stuttered. "W-What are you doing here?" Sadie slid her hands into her jean pockets. "I wanted to talk to you." she said. "Can I come in?" Ryan moved aside letting her walk passed him. She noticed that the bed wasn't made so she sat down on one of the pool house chairs. Ryan returned after closing the door, straightened the blankets on the futon and sat down. His nap made him feel better, but now his stomach was flip-flopping. What was he supposed to say to Sadie?

"Did I wake you?" she asked, seeing him rub the sleep from his eyes. "Don't worry about it." he informed. "I was just resting my eyes until Seth and Summer came back." The room was silenced again. "So, uh..." They could both sense the growing awkwardness. "You're wondering why I'm here?" she asked. Ryan slowly nodded "Kinda." he said. "Not that I don't like that you are." Sadie ran her hands down her thighs, stopping at the knee and getting down to business. "Look Ryan, I'm just gonna come right out and say it." she started. "I like you okay? I wouldn't have stayed if I didn't." Ryan's stomach flip flopped more as she went on. "I need to know how you feel about me because right now...we just keep going around and around stuck in this stupid triangle." Ryan shook his head urged forward slightly. "No, Sadie. It's not like-" She stopped him. "Ryan don't." she said. "Don't make it seem like this surprises you...I know you still have feelings for Marissa. If you didn't then this wouldn't be a problem."

He sat across from her, defeated and surprised even though he knew his feelings were apparent to all. "Sadie come on." he complained. "I'm sorry. I'm really trying, ya know?" Sadie sighed in frustration and regret. "I'm sorry too." she said. "I'm sorry that we rushed into such a serious thing so soon." Her face was blank, completely serious in her speech, her eyes burning through him. "Yeah, but...I mean the other night was..." She interrupted him again. "Fun?" Ryan nodded. He did have fun with Sadie. But it was a different kind of fun. She made him happy, but he felt comfortable and awkward at the same time with her. Was he just using her to get over Marissa? They had rushed into things. Ryan hadn't slept with some one so soon since he'd been in Newport...except Theresa of course but that was a different story. He waited two whole years to consummate his relationship with Marissa...and now he made it seem like nothing with Sadie.

"Yeah, yeah." he stuttered again. "I'm just..." He stopped, trying to form the right words and not look like a complete jackass. "You're not ready, I get it." she said. "But you seemed pretty ready the other night." Ryan's eyes fell to the floor. "I don't know what to say." he said, vulnerability evident in his voice. "You don't have to say anything yet." she informed. "But I don't have time to sit and wait for you anymore. You need to decide what you want, and soon. I can't stay here forever, Ryan. I really need to go back home...I've been here too long already. The only reason I would stay is if-" He finished her thought. "...Is if I chose you?" She moved forward slightly and touched the back of his hand. "Just let me know." she said, reaching up to rub his head. "I can try and make this work but if you don't want it...I'm gone."

With that, Sadie got up and walked to the door, taking one last look at Ryan. He looked at her and nodded, telling her that he'd think about it. Ryan knew Sadie wanted a relationship. He thought he wanted one too. But after everything...he just wasn't ready for this yet. He really liked Sadie, but didn't want to lead her on anymore.

Seth walked into the pool house, looking over his shoulder and then at Ryan, who was still sitting at the end of his bed, holding his chin in his palm. He was deep in thought and didn't even pay attention to Seth wafting the smell of pancakes in his direction. "Hey man, brought you back a little something." he said, holding out the styrofoam container. "Was that Sadie I saw walking out of here?" Ryan looked up at Seth with a straight face, took his pancakes and placed them on the bed next to him. "I don't know what I'm supposed to say to her", Ryan finally stated. "She came here to basically tell me I had to chose immediately between her and Marissa. She said she'd give me time to think about it but I have to make a final decision soon." Seth sat in the chair that previously held Sadie. "Well what'd you say to that?"

Ryan looked at the ground, shaking his head in confusion. "I don't know...I agreed to think about it but I don't know what to do." He paused, putting a hand under his chin. "I keep making stupid mistakes and I'm just digging myself deeper." Seth nodded and smacked his lips together. "Well sleeping with people you pretty much just met tends to have that side affect." he said, leaning back as Ryan gave him a death glare again. "I mean, I know I told you to go for it with Sadie...I just didn't think you'd sleep with her so soon." he sustained. Ryan threw himself back on the bed, running his hands over his face to shield his head ache from the light. "Neither did I...we didn't plan it, it just happened." Seth nodded, but squinted his eyes with Ryan's last plea. "Sex doesn't really just happen." he said. "There's always stuff leading to it and then a fair amount of nakedness involved."

Ryan rolled his eyes and exhaled, pulling himself back up to sit straight. "I just need to think about everything. Sadie...and Marissa." Seth crossed his legs and ran a finger across his hairline. "No offense, man. But haven't you given this thought already?" he asked, assuming it didn't take so long to know his plan. "I mean you obviously had to feel something for Sadie...and obviously lacked that something with Marissa or else you wouldn't have broken up with her in the first place, right?" Ryan gaped at him, the advise giver who right now was just being hypocritical "...Says the guy who never chose between Summer and Anna, right?" Seth closed his eyes and dropped his head, pointing a finger at Ryan. "Good point." he muttered, letting his leg drop from his knee and back down to the ground. "I guess...it just seems like since I haven't seen Marissa or talked about anything, she's always there in my head." Ryan said. She's been gone for over a week..."

Seth bit his lip and figured now was the time to spill his Marissa's sighting. "Umm, yeah...about that." he said. "After Summer and I ate, we sort of saw Marissa on the pier." His news jerked Ryan's attention. "Was she alone?" he asked, anxiety breaching. "Yeah she was just standing there...she saw Summer and me looking at her and then just took off." Seth explained, knowing Ryan wouldn't like the fact. "We lost her in the crowd so Summer went to look for her some more. She couldn't have gone far." Ryan listened and sighed. "Why would she run off like that?"

Seth shrugged. "I don't know, I guess she just didn't want to talk to us yet." he said, stating his honest opinion. "Maybe this is like what happened after she found out about her mom and Luke. She probably just wants you to be the one to bring her home."

"I doubt that." Ryan said. "I'm probably the last person she wants to see right now." Seth got up and stood in front of the futon. "You never know." he mumbled walking past Ryan toward the door. "Look man, you and Marissa need to talk, you need to figure out how you feel about Sadie...make everything easier for yourself." He pointed behind him with his thumb, no standing in front of the open door. "I'm gonna go back and find Summer."

After Seth left, Ryan continued playing the "What if?" game. What if Marissa really did want him to find her? What if he and Sadie were supposed to be together? What if he couldn't chose and everything stayed this horrible? Ryan had to make a decision sooner or later, and Sadie had pretty much made the decision that it had to be sooner. Ryan picked up the phone, hesitating whether or not he should do this. Shaking off all thought, he dialed and put it to his ear waiting for response from the other end.

"Hey um, I really need to talk to you...about everything."