A/N: Hello guys! This is a Quinn chapter, her run, thoughts. I hope it does not disappoint. Also, I was thinking about adding a bit of Santana's POV for the next couple of chapters, like I've been doing with Rachel's…

Anyway, thanks for sticking around, and reading, and reviewing, and subscribing! You guys are amazing!


I started to run without thinking where I was going, I just needed to get away from everything and running always did the trick for me. I had my iPod on shuffle, but I wasn't really listening to the music, as much as I was trying to get away from my own thoughts they always seemed to find a way to catch up with me.

I didn't understand what happened, how could one day change everything, how that series of little events managed to get through me this easily. Maybe I was just tired of pretending.

"If there ever is an award for mastering the art of Pretending, you'd definitely win it Fabray!"

I know that is true, after many years I had finally perfected the art of pretending, pretending I don't care, pretending to smile, pretending to like people, pretending that I'm not tired… pretending that it doesn't hurt. And apparently I was so good I almost fooled myself into believing all of it… almost.

I had now run at least a couple of blocks, Lima was a small town but right now it felt like a freaking huge city. It was like one of those nightmares where you run and run but never get anywhere, when you're running as fast as you can but your feet are heavy, or you're screaming at the top of your lungs but no sound is coming out.

Yeah that's how I was feeling. Trapped. And I needed to run faster, to run far away. I needed to get out of my own skin.

I started to run faster, trying to shake the feeling of being trapped, off. But it was not happening. No matter how fast I ran, all the images of what had happened today kept on playing in my mind, over and over again. All the laughter, all the looks, all the voices, all the faces… every sinlge one haunting me, taunting me. My lungs and throat were burning, the air was a bit chilly and I was hot on anger and shame and because I had been running for little more than hour, I could already feel my knees giving in when a specific face popped into my head, a face which gave me the push I needed, if only to have someone to discharge all my anger with.

Santana.

Santana Lopez, what great excuse of a best friend I found. Somehow I always knew that when it came down to who would get to be HBIC, she'd find a way to steal it, I was always prepared for that... but this? No, never.

I never thought she'd actually kick me while I was down. Out of all the people I had ever called friends Santana was the only one I actually believed to be one, well Brittany too of course but the girl doesn't have a mean bone in her body, Santana was the one who knew me best, we always understood each other, we knew how the other's mind worked and we knew the "struggle for power" in highschool was just something that was bound to happen and didn't really considered it as a motive to stop being friends.

But this?

No.

Slushie me?

Never.

I wasn't thinking straight and I was running as fast as I could, now with a motive, now with a target.

"Great Fabray! What are you gonna do? Go to her house and yell at her from outside? Make even more of a spectacle of yourself than you already have?"

I didn't care, I knew Santana's parents were not there right now and they wouldn't even know. I had already been humiliated, and by her nonetheless! What did I care if the neighbors heard me yelling at her? Heck, she deserved it! She had it coming since the moment the thought came into her mind! She asked for it! She… She…

I sighed and shook my head, who was I trying to fool? It wasn't about Santana… It was about me. I needed it. I needed an excuse to lose it and just yell, and Santana gave me the perfect opening; which I had no intension to waste.

I finally got to the Lopez's home. My knees were shaking and I was amazed that I was still able to stand up. My lungs felt like they were on fire, but I still managed to get enough breath to shout out her name.

"SANTANA!"

Santana's car was not there, I growled in frustration and kicked myself internally because she would obviously not be there. Cheerios practice. She was now captain and she would be the last to leave.

"Fantastic Fabray! Just great! What better way to make even more of a fool of yourself than yelling to a freaking empty house huh! What if Santana's parents were here? Or what if they arrived just now? What the hell would you do then Fabray! Hell, what would you do if Santana was actually here? Just yell at her for everyone to see? And then what? Cry? What the hell kind of a Fabray are you!"

I felt like crying, I felt like just throwing myself on the lawn and never getting up. I couldn't breathe; partly because of all the running I had just done and partly because of everything building up inside of me.

"Dammit!"

Was all I was able to mutter under my breath, it was just a whisper but it was the best I could do. I wouldn't cry and I knew that anything louder than a whisper would make the tears fall.

I needed to keep moving, I needed to gather all the strength I had left and run away from there before anyone saw me there. But I couldn't, I couldn't move, or breathe or think. My feet felt like steel, heavy, unyielding, and unmoving. My heart was beating so rapidly that I felt I was having a heart attack and I was just bent over my knees panting, trying to recover.

What the hell kind of a Fabray are you!

The truth is I didn't even know anymore what kind of anything I was. I started to feel lightheaded and a small rush of panic went through me, was I about to faint? I needed to control my breahing!

"Breathe… Just… Just breathe…"

"Calm yourself down Fabray!"

I was suddenly tired, I knew I was still on Santana's lawn and needed to get out but, I didn't have strength left.

"What's wrong with me?"

You are the disappointment here.

I froze.

I knew that voice with not a single doubt on my mind and I was suddenly scared.

You are the disappointment here.

Why was it coming back to haunt me now?

"Well, you did ask a question didn't you?"

"No, no, no, no. Stop!"

I knew this feeling. I knew this pain in my chest. I was familiar with it, a reflex from when my father lived with us. Feeling like this was the last thing I needed right now.

What the hell kind of a Fabray are you!

You are the disappointment here.

I'm disappointed in you Q.

Loser!

What's up preggers?

"Stop! Just Stop!"

I wasn't really yelling, I was pleading, just whispering my pleads into the air. I was tired of feeling like this. I was tired of that feeling tearing me down every day. I thought that if I just stopped pretending at school it would just go away, but it didn't, it was still there finding new ways of making me tear myself down.

But not anymore, I couldn't take it. I wasn't strong enough to deal with it all…

I just wanted to cry and sink into the ground… But that's not what Fabray's do. They hold their chin up high and walk on pretending everything's all right because maybe if you didn't talk about it then it didn't exist.

I felt a tear streaming down my face and I boosted up. I started running harder and faster than before.

I was a disappointment, a disgrace, I was weak, and I was letting my emotions get the best of me. I was doing exactly what I had spent most of my life trying not to do… And I couldn't care less.

The truth is, I was tired. I was exhausted. I didn't know what would break first, my heart or my legs, but I couldn't stop. I had to keep going. If I stopped I would just stay wherever I was and I didn't know if I was going to be able to get up.

I just kept on running, aimlessly once again, with no idea of where to go or where I was, every freaking street looked the same, every house looked the same.

I didn't know where the energy was coming from, I couldn't feel my legs and my lungs were about to collapse. I was covered in sweat and I was extremely heated… but somehow I couldn't stop shaking. I just wanted this feeling to go away, I needed to shake it, I needed to get away from it… I had already cracked and I wasn't going to be able to hold much longer.

I suddenly came to a complete halt when I recognized the street I was in.

I don't know what was it that made me recognize it. I had only been on that street a couple of times, but the moment I turned around the corner I just halted.

I needed to catch my breath before I passed out. I was exhausted, I was drained and I was moving in autopilot.

Somehow I knew exactly where I was going, but my brain was not able to process anything, I was numb, I was very much like a zombie. I couldn't feel my legs anymore and I knew I was still breathing because my lungs hurt whenever I inhaled. I didn't even know if my heart was still beating.

I saw some steps and I sat on them, staring at the ground beneath me with not a single thought in my head, all the noise had gone away and with it, it took the rest of my sensations. I just sat there staring at the ground, at my feet, at my hands, unable to move, unable to feel.

I don't know how much time I sat there, something was playing on my iPod (which I completely forgot I had on me), but I couldn't understand a word! So I just turned it off in time to hear a car pulling over in front of me and an engine shutting down. But I still couldn't raise my head.

I heard a muffled voice, a voice I knew by heart, and it sounded like it was saying my name. I felt something stir inside of me. I felt her sitting down next to me and again I heard the muffled voice, something like

"Are you okay?"

Or

"Why are you shaking?"

I couldn't really be sure, but then I heard her say my name again and I was finally able to look up and meet those immense chocolate eyes with my own and I was able to feel my heart beating once again.

She asked once again if I was okay and I just nodded, never taking my eyes of off her, she looked so worried I actually believed she was.

She put her hand on my arm and she gasped at how cold I was, the air was even chillier than before and I was no longer hot from the run nor did I have any adrenaline left.

"Are you sure you're okay Quinn?"

I nodded again, a small smile on my lips thanks to that voice. Her eyes changed from worried to confused.

"Why are you here Quinn? And how long have you been sitting here?"

I just looked at her, I was having trouble processing the words she just said, I was just too tired. But I knew I had to make an effort and answer her. I took a deep breath.

"I just needed to run and ended up here. I… I'm not really sure how long I have been here, I was just really tired. I'm sorry".

I knew I should get up and leave but I couldn't, apparently my legs had a mind of their own today. All I could do was sit there, and look into those eyes as they shifted through emotions. Trying to figure out what she was thinking. Trying to formulate words. But I still couldn't.

"Come on Quinn. I'll take you to your house. It's quite chilly out here, and you don't look like you will be able to walk back."

She helped pull me up, and as soon as I was standing up a switch in my brain was turned on.

"Rachel I…"

I needed to apologize, but I didn't know how. A Fabray never apologizes!

Would a simple "I'm Sorry" work?

She was looking at me, waiting for me to say something but I was just standing there with my mouth half open. She sighed and started making her way to her car.

"I'm sorry Rach"

She stopped and turned around to meet me. I could see she was still hesitant, but there still was a small spark of hope in her eyes which gave me strength to carry on. I took a step forward to meet her so she would be looking at my eyes while I spoke.

"I'm sorry for leaving you there. Is tomorrow after school okay for you?"

I instantly knew I had said the right thing because as her eyes shone and her smile reached them, I felt everything again… and all my exhaustion really sunk in.

"Yes Quinn. Tomorrow is perfect!"

I chuckled at her excitement, and realized it actually hurt to do so.

"Great! But, I will have to take you up on you offer to take me home. I don't think I'll make it by foot."

I sent her a small tired smile, and she just nodded, taking me by the arm and guiding me to her car.

As soon as I got it I felt sleep trying to take over me, it was so warm and comfortable in there that I just wanted to stay there. I suspected my house would be empty still, and not nearly as warm as Rachel's car. But at that moment I was just relieved I could still feel it.

She got inside, turned her engine on and started driving towards my house, a smile on her lips for the promise of tomorrow.

Looking at her a thought crossed my mind, a thought that gave me a promise for tomorrow:

"Funny how life works sometimes. How if you have your mind on overdrive and just let everything else take over you'll always end up in the right place."