The Place You Will Return To


Take Note:

This is a sequel to 'The Air That You Breathe'. To completely appreciate the story, please read the prequel before proceeding. Thank you.


Full Story Summary:

(Mikoto Suoh x fem!Reisi Munakata) And so the butterfly effect begins. Months passed since then Red King, Mikoto Suoh, had made the ultimate decision to set himself free from the influence of the Slate. Without the Red King to guide them, Homra plunged into a great fallout, endangering the group's very existence. A new and powerful enemy has risen and has caused a dilemma that could endanger mankind. Graciously accepting the duty as the guardian of the mysterious Dresden Slate, the Blue Queen, Reisi Munakata, is then faced with a crisis that might lead her to her untimely death. (also contains Izumo x Seri and Saruhiko x Misaki)


Chapter Seven:

Puzzle Pieces

I'm here again
A thousand miles away from you
A broken mess, just scattered pieces of who I am
I tried so hard
Thought I could do this on my own


"Welcome!" Izumo looked up as the bell by the bar's entrance clang while the door was opened. He had smiled cheerfully, expecting to see a certain customer but much to his chagrin, the one who just came into the bar was none other than Homra's vanguard, Misaki Yata. Usually, at this time of afternoon…

Seeing Izumo's disappointed look, Misaki smirked at him, "Hey, yer expectin' to see that woman again in here, huh?" the young redhead teased with a huge, mocking grin on his face. He knew who it was that the bartender was hoping and expecting to see.

The blonde bartender snorted at the younger boy's teasing, looking away before taking a martini glass before wiping it with a towel. "There ain't no reason for me to deny that…" he shrugged with a small smile on his lips. He had been rather used to seeing the female lieutenant of Scepter 4 coming in the bar since she had been visiting the bar almost every day now. She had been coming to him for support…especially since their Captain has taken a long-ass three month leave. Seri Awashima can't handle all that stress herself.

"You really like that Heartless Woman, don't cha?" Misaki continued on with the teasing.

"Well…she's pretty…strong, clever and smart too…and…very, very hot…"

He said the right words to make Misaki blush in embarrassment. Of course, the little naïve and innocent Misaki Yata would feel rather uncomfortable when he described Seri's body as 'very, very hot'. People who don't see how much of a bombshell that woman is must be blind outta their minds.

Clearing his throat, Misaki looked away from Izumo. "Geez, what's with you guys and those female Blues?" he sighed beneath his breath as he took a seat on barstool opposite the bartender. "First, Mikoto-san and now, you? I dun fuckin' git it. What's so attractive about those boring Blues?"

"C'mon…don't talk like you're not attracted to one of the clansmen of Scepter 4, hey…" Izumo said, "…you're madly in love with Saruhiko Fushimi-kun, right?"

The mere mention of the name 'Saruhiko Fushimi' immediately riled Misaki up and it looked like all the blood in his body rushed to his head. It had always been like that – Izumo mentions Saruhiko's name and the redhead would lose it. It was really fun teasing Misaki like that when he loses his marbles like that with Saruhiko. It makes Izumo really think that the vanguard is really in love with his former best friend.

"I am not in love with that motherfucking, goddamned bastard traitor!" Misaki shouted, angrily. His face red as a tomato. The blonde was laughing now. Damn, he could never get enough of that redhead's face. The boy may act so tough and cool but deep inside, he really is but an awkward boy. He was rather like his adorable little brother, actually. Misaki was freaking out, still. He continued going on about him being not in love with Saruhiko, about him hating him to his stomach, about it being impossible for him to fall in love with a traitorous bastard like Saruhiko.

Izumo doesn't get why Misaki is so bat-shit crazy angry at Saruhiko. Mikoto was fine with him leaving Homra to join Scepter 4 and so was Izumo. Others do not exactly care about his decision while Misaki is still utterly full of bitterness and pain. The poor boy…surely, Saruhiko meant more to him than he knows.

"Okay…okay…" Izumo said, cutting Misaki's furious monologue. "Stop it already, geez. I was kidding, Yata-chan."

"It ain't funny, Kusanagi-san!"

"Geez, so sorry 'bout that. So, what's up? What're you doing here in the first place?"

"Just wanna hang out…" the redhead replied with a slight shrug, "…so, is Mikoto-san sleeping already?"

"Mikoto isn't here anymore and wouldn't be coming to Homra for a while, you know. Two days ago, he finally went to the Blue Queen. He has to mend their relationship…especially after what happened to their kid." Izumo explained. Sighing, he shook his head, placing the glass on the table. "It must be hard on them, you know. Expecting for their kid to be finally with them, only to discover that their son is actually dead. It's so sad."

Misaki didn't answer. Truth is, he has no idea what he must say. He's too young to even put himself in Mikoto's situation. Izumo seem to look rather affected with what happened. Well, Misaki only feels bad because he saw how Mikoto was for the last two weeks and he didn't look too good. He didn't expect that the older redhead would even go back to the Blue Queen. Mikoto keeps coming back to that woman and Misaki couldn't understand what he sees in her – the Blue Queen seem to be but a snobby, boring and contemptuous know-it-all who does not seem to be too compatible with Mikoto so he couldn't still wrap his brain around the idea of Mikoto head over heels with her. And besides, she's the Blue Queen the Head-honcho of Order. Sure, he knew her before she was the Blue Queen but, hell, she sounded like she was the same boring, snobby and contemptuous know-it-all that she is right now since before she became the Blue Queen. What the hell does he see in her?

"By the way, Yata-chan…" Izumo said, "…lighten up a bit with the Blue Queen, especially when Mikoto is around. He doesn't show it but it deeply saddens him when you and the others show such an apparent loathing for her. She is his girl, after all, and he loves her as much as he loves Homra."

"I'll try…" Misaki said. Okay, that he understands because he also loses it when people talk shit about Homra. Mikoto must feel the same way when they say spiteful words to Reisi Munakata as when people speak badly about the Red Clan. Izumo was right…as usual.

"I'm not asking you to like her…you can hate her all you want but do it quietly. I also do not like her that much but I have to suck it up because my best friend loves her. Kindly tell the others too, okay?

. . .

It was time to finally leave the house of Reisi's parents. Mikoto doesn't blame Reisi's parents to feel betrayed by him – they trusted their prodigy daughter, their most prized flower, to him and he just hurt her. Since he came back after two weeks, Reisi's father kept glaring at him while Reisi's mother could not stop looking at him with a pained and disappointed look on her face. He has to take it all in…because it was his fault, after all. All the words he shouted at Reisi was truly despicable. Even Taishi looks at him with hurt in his eyes.

They are now going to move back to Reisi's house – the one nearer to the headquarters and Taishi would be the one who would bring them to that place with his truck.

It's unfortunate that Mikoto would leave Reisi's parents and her brother in bad terms but he could not force them to forgive him and forget the painful words he spoke to Reisi back in the hospital. Perhaps, they would come to forgive him…but only time could tell.

Mikoto was waiting as Reisi speaks to her parents and to Taishi's children, her niece and her nephew, telling them her good-byes and expressing her gratitude. Mikoto had in his mouth a lit cigarette and he was enjoying a smoke all by himself while he leaned against the truck parked in front of the house. He was exhausted with all the packing they did with their things and with all the carrying and lifting he did. The things they bought for Nazo was left there in that house, Mikoto could not look at them…more so can he not touch them. A few seconds later, Taishi came out of the house and moved towards his truck. Mikoto averted the older man's eyes but Taishi called his attention, calling him, "Suoh-kun…"

Looking to meet Taishi's eyes, the redhead waited for the man to continue speaking.

Taishi seemed hesitant but after taking a deep breath, he spoke up, "Mother and Father are still very mad at you because of the way you acted with my nephew's death, your son's death. It was inexcusable. You hurt my parents, you hurt me…most of all, you hurt Reisi deeply." Mikoto opened his mouth to speak but Taishi gestured that he not interrupt him, "But I would giving you another chance. You see, I am really rooting for you for my sister." Taishi continued, offering a hand towards the redhead, "I would give you a second and last chance…but if you hurt Reisi again, I swear that you being part of Homra won't help you when I kill you, Suoh-kun."

"I won't hurt Reisi again." Mikoto said, his voice as firm as the grip of his hand on Taishi's hand. He shook the man's hand, "And I ain't makin' promises because I will do what I can and I must to make her happy…"

"Good." Taishi smiled.

As they let go of each other's hands, Reisi finally stepped out of the house, a grave expression on her exhausted features. Seeing that Mikoto and her brother had made up, that said serious expression on her face was replaced with a subtle smile. "Oya, oya…" she said, catching Mikoto's eyes as he turned to look at her, "…I see that the two of you are on good terms." She walked to Mikoto's side and her boyfriend put his arm over her shoulders as he pulls her closer against him. He felt Reisi flinch at his touch and he raised his eyebrow, "What's up, babe?" he muttered, pressing his lips against her cheek.

Reisi did not answer his question, "Brother, we should really get going…"

Gesturing inside his truck, Taishi smiled, "Hop in."

Throughout the travel, the three of them were quiet, with only the tunes being played on the radio resonating around them. Mikoto glanced at Reisi as he leaned against the seat she was sitting on. Reisi was seated on the passenger's seat with Taishi on the driver's seat. Mikoto, on the other hand, was seated at the back all alone. It has gotten a bit awkward between him and Reisi. Two days had passed since the day he came back to her. The weeks that had passed when they weren't together wasn't that far away and that's why Reisi isn't comfortable with Mikoto yet. The wound he cut deeply with the words he spoke to her the day of Nazo's death was still fresh, apparently.

It took almost an hour for them to finally reach Reisi's place. Taishi dropped them off, helped with their baggage and then left after that. The insides of the house was dusty so the two of them cleaned the place up immediately. Finally, they finished tidying the place up. Mikoto was certain that they were exhausted with the travel and the earlier preparations but there is a deeper reason why they couldn't keep still, why both of them are so restless. They were simply delaying their time to talk.

They haven't quite spoken to one another openly about all the things that had gone between them. They haven't really settled things out with one another. There wasn't the right moment there in the house of Reisi's parents.

They rested on their sofa, breathless with all work they did. Reisi was staring blankly into space while Mikoto takes her hand in his before gently squeezing it. The emptiness of the room complements how hollow he feels inside.

"This place looks so alien to me…" Reisi mumbled, resting her head against Mikoto's shoulder, "It is rather strange that I think that. I've been living here for quite some time, even before the time that I got to know that you were the Red King but it feels like a whole different place right now." She sighed. Her voice sounded so melancholic. It actually broke Mikoto's heart. He could feel the tension between them increasing. Clearing his throat, nervously, the redhead spoke, "You hungry? I can fix something up…"

"I'm not hungry…"

The two of them sat quietly, both of them staring at the emptiness before them. Reisi is right. Actually, it's not strange that she thinks her house is alien to her. This place…the place he comes by often before to spend time with Reisi had felt like a place he had gone to for the first time. They're back to the place they call their home and yet…why does he feel so glum when they are back in their supposed sanctuary?

What was missing?

. . .

The day she discovered that she was pregnant with Mikoto's child, she was stricken with a mind-numbing fear and anxiety. It was her first time then to be gripped with that sort of terror. She knew that the father of her child then had a fear of commitment and responsibility so she feared that when she tells him the truth about her carrying his child, he would simply leave her just as he wanted to do in the first place. She thought that there wasn't any point that she tell him that time since he had decided to die anyway. He was too hell-bent in avenging his friend and dying afterwards…dying in her hands to be more specific. She wanted to save him…and yet he seemed to blind and deaf to her efforts…well, until the last minute when he renounced his throne.

That day, she understood that Mikoto Suoh was indeed an unpredictable man…especially when he tried to propose to her.

Reisi laid on her side on her bed, tracing with her fingers the ring she had around her finger.

She retired to bed immediately while her boyfriend ate supper alone.

It's been two weeks and yet she still could not get her mind off of their stillborn child. It's curious how someone would feel this much grief and sorrow with the death of someone who she never really bonded much…but then again, her son had been in her womb for nearly nine months and that's enough time for her to love the boy with all her heart. Nazo wasn't just her son…to her, he meant more than that.

The creaking sound of the door being opened startled Reisi. Mikoto had come to check up on her.

"Can't sleep, babe?"

"I can't."

It has been like that for days now. She had to lay on the bed, staring blankly into space, waiting for sleep to come get her. She was facing the wall adjacent to her bed, her back facing Mikoto who came into the room, closing the door behind him. The bed creaked as Mikoto moved unto it, sitting beside the woman who was laid on her side, comfortably curled with the bed sheet covering the lower half of her body.

He was lost in his own thoughts as he sat there beside her. Perhaps, he was thinking of the right words to say to her to appease all the pain and grief inside her…words he had already said to her for the past two days. She understands that he wanted to make her feel better…but it just isn't happening.

"I thought that if you're by my side, I would not feel so miserable. I thought when you came back, I would finally be fine but…" Reisi mumbled, "…but it just keeps getting worse and worse."

"I…"

"If you want to make me feel better, hold me…make love to me and…" she turned to face him, only to meet shocked and wide amber eyes. She sat up, eyes glued to his.

Mikoto shuddered at the sight of Reisi's eyes. She looked dead with those dull, insensible eyes. What scared him more was the words that were coming out of her mouth. He opened his mouth to retort but Reisi had pinned him beneath her swiftly. The Blue Queen drew closer to him, pressing her lips hard against his lips that Mikoto actually winced in pain and forcing his mouth to open with hers so that her tongue could come and explore his orifice. Her body felt stiff against him, and her appendages were trembling violently.

"Reisi, what the fuck are you doing?!" Mikoto panted as soon as Reisi had released his lips from the rough kiss. Mikoto tried to take control of the situation. He struggled to get Reisi's grip off of him while she desperately continued to hold him down, kissing his neck and caressing his body. He needed to get her off of him without actually hurting her. His eyes widened upon feeling her palm rubbing against his manhood, eliciting a deep groan from him.

After a few attempts, Mikoto succeeded and he grabbed hold of Reisi's arms before rolling on top of her this time. He pinned her wrists down on the bed, glowering at her, "This isn't gonna solve anything!" he said. She continued to squirm from his grip, trying to get herself free from him. The bed continued creaking at their struggle and it was making quite a noise. Mikoto closed his eyes, frustration and anger building inside him.

"You won't bring Nazo back anymore, Munakata!"

The words just slipped out of his mouth.

Mikoto's eyes flicked open as those words left his mouth. Beneath him, Reisi had stopped moving at the mere mention of their unborn son's name. Wide-eyed, she stared at the man on top of her. He gritted his teeth together as tears began to well up at the corners of his lover's eyes. He always hated seeing Reisi like this…he also hated when he does this to her most especially. He lets her wrists go before scooping her body up and putting his arms around her, holding her against him in a tight embrace. Reisi sobbed against him quietly as she clung to his shirt.

"We can't bring him back anymore…" Mikoto whispered.

They were quiet for a bit. Only the sound of Reisi's sobbing filled Mikoto's ears as he drowned in the feeling of despair.

"I'm sorry." Reisi sniveled. "You can leave me now…you have nothing else that's keeping you from leaving me…"

"Reisi…!"

He didn't know what her words could have meant.

Reisi pushes herself free from Mikoto's hold and laid herself back on her side, her back once again facing the redhead. He could see that she was sobbing. This woman…she is completely different from the Reisi Munakata he knew, the Reisi Munakata who had been doing everything with ease and succeeding without even breaking a sweat, the perfect Blue Queen. She's broken. And he is the only one who is able to see her as she is right now – a broken mess.

Sighing, Mikoto laid down his side, moving closer to the woman before letting his arms slither around her body.

He loves her. Be it the perfect woman who struts in her respectable uniform. Be it the student prodigy whose flowers he destroyed. Be it the mother of his child. Be it the Captain of the Clan they clashed with. Be it the Blue Queen who wanted nothing else but to save him from himself. And most especially be it this woman he is holding in his arms right now, battered and bruised with ugly scars that made her feel utterly ugly.

. . . . .

That morning, Mikoto woke up to see his lover still lying on the bed beside him, staring blankly at the ceiling above them with unblinking and emotionless violet eyes. Last night was quite a scare. He never would have thought that the loss of their child had impacted Reisi that much. He knew that it terribly hurt her but not to the point that she was completely messed up. She was Reisi Munakata, the Blue Queen, the Queen of Order, the prim and proper woman who never had a strand of hair out of place; she's strong…he thought that she will not be wavered by anything…but it seems that he was wrong. Everyone has their limits, obviously…and Reisi had reached her limit when Nazo died.

His head throbbed at the sight of the bright rays of sunlight that had seeped into their room through the windows.

"Reisi…"

When Reisi remained silent beside him, Mikoto prepared to leave the bed but the Blue Queen took hold of his wrist, stopping him midway. He looked back to her direction and she was staring right through him. "Stay here a little longer with me." His lover whispered softly.

How can he refuse her? Especially after what happened that night…

Mikoto sighed.

Taking a seat back beside Reisi, Mikoto relaxed on the bed, letting out a long sigh as he laid down finally. As soon as he had laid down, Reisi leaned against him. Now that they're alone, Reisi could finally speak all the words she wanted to say without having to worry what her parents or her brother has to say. After what transpired last night, they should really, really talk.

Hesitantly, Mikoto finally spoke, "You have to talk to me, Reisi…"

After a bit of silence between them, Reisi lets out a sigh and surrendered finally. "Those two weeks when we were apart…I was…" Reisi said, "…I was in hell. I had to mourn for Nazo all alone. Through the merciless days and through the sleepless nights, I felt so alone. Even when my parents and Taishi with me, I could not help but still feel that I was on my own with this cross of grief heavy on my shoulders. You were supposed to help me carry it but you weren't there for me." She was raising her trembling voice by the second. "You were supposed to be there because I needed you. But you weren't there."

"Reisi…"

"Nazo was supposed to be the one who'll keep us together. And when he died…I thought that our relationship will completely fall apart. Isn't Nazo the one who made you decide to choose life over death? And so I thought…I thought…" The words continued to flow from Reisi's mouth. Mikoto stared at Reisi in complete aghast. All this time, she was in fear that he's only with her because he feels like he should because he impregnated her? She doesn't believe that he truly, sincerely and wholeheartedly loves her? She thinks that she needs Nazo to keep him by her side? She thinks that if she no longer carries his son, he will leave her?

She took a deep breath before continuing, "You were hurt, I understand but I was hurt as well, Suoh…and you hurt me despite the fact that I was already hurt beyond any words. You hurt me but still…I can't bring myself to hate you the way I hated myself for Nazo's death. I kept thinking that it was my fault, that you were right."

He was right?

Try as he might to forget all the shitty words he spoke to her, they all came back to his head, haunting him.

'This is yer fault…' No, that was wrong. It wasn't Reisi's fault at all.

'If you only listened to me then Nazo may be alive. He wouldn't be dead now, would he? If you only stopped doing yer goddamn job for only a few fucking days then he wouldn't be fucking dead right now, right? If you weren't fuckin' 'round inside the Dresden Slate chamber doing fuck knows what then he shouldn't be dead!' There wasn't a specific reason that would have caused Nazo's death. He continued to blame Reisi even if it wasn't her fault at all.

Mikoto gritted his teeth together, his words from before echoing inside his brain, clanging and deafening him.

'You killed him, Munakata!'

'There ain't nobody else who did a shittier job of being a mother than you!'

No. No. No.

Everything that he said were all wrong. He was an idiot. He was an idiot for hurting Reisi.

That time, she was already bleeding…and yet, he just had to pull out a knife and cut her open so that she could bleed to death and then he left her all alone to die.

"When you left, I thought that you won't come back to me anymore…and…" Reisi sneered, "…I accepted it. I accepted that you may no longer come back to me because you can now be free to spend your life as you want to spend it."

"Listen to me when I say that it wasn't Nazo who convinced me to live on that time in the school on the island. It was you who was the one who convinced me to stay. I realized that I love you and I cannot leave you behind. I love you no matter what. I only wanna live a life with you by my side an' nothin' else." Mikoto said as soon as Reisi finished speaking. His hands were trembling with all the emotions he was feeling all at once. He couldn't contain all the guilt, the fear and the melancholy he have with him all at once as he spoke. "And the words I said to you before…I wasn't right at all, goddammit…" he said in response, "It wasn't your fault. Nobody wanted Nazo dead. I'm so sorry…words aren't enough for me to express how much I hate myself for hurting you. Reisi, let me fix this…"

"No…"

Mikoto felt his heart skip a beat at Reisi's answer. His jaw dropped, his eyes widened. The world he knew had suddenly shattered right before his eyes in an instant. He felt as if he was hanging from the very edge of a skyscraper and had lost his grip and right now, he was in the middle of a free fall that would end his life. But when Reisi looked up to look him in the eye, a smile on her lips, he felt himself being saved with an arm grabbing for his, pulling him back to safety, on the skyscraper he had fallen from. "You don't have to fix this alone. I'd like to do my part too. We will fix this, Mikoto." She said. "By the two weeks that passed, I learned something…"

She paused, letting out a soft sigh, "Yesterday, before we could move back here, my mother asked me if I were sure if I want to live with a man like you for the rest of my life. She was scared that you'll hurt me again. She's scared the way I was." Reisi continued, holding on to the ring around her finger. She held it gently, like it was the most precious thing she has with her. "A man is not defined by his past errors in life; he is defined by the actions he does to redeem himself from these mistakes. You are a man who never fails to do everything to make up for your mistakes. You are the man I want to spend forever with, Mikoto Suoh. And I have learned that I can't live without you."

Hearing those words from his lover's lips was…unexplainable. Slowly, his eyes widened with shock as her words sank into him. He wanted to tell her that he indeed learned something from their time apart. He learned that his life isn't the same without her, he learned that he can't live a life without Reisi Munakata by his side, he learned that without her, he is actually nothing. He wanted to speak to her but he was just overwhelmed with the happiness that made his heart flutter. Instead opening his mouth to let the words flow, he cupped Reisi's face in his hands and guided it so that their lips could meet in a tender kiss. He loves her so much. Releasing her lips, he hugged her, letting her snuggle against his chest as he caressed her back gently with his rough hands.

They're back. He could really say that they're back home


I've come undone
But you make sense of who I am
Like puzzle pieces in your hand,
Then I see your face
I know I'm finally yours
I find everything I thought I lost before
You call my name
I come to you in pieces
So you can make me whole

- Pieces by Red -


Author's Notes:

I think I owe you all something rather light after that heavy bomb I dropped on all of you. Hehehe.

Let me explain how the members of Homra reacted on what happened last chapter. These young men..well, they're young and let's think about it: they only see the issue as a tiny, tiny picture - the picture Mikoto drew for them so they're really gonna be biased about it. Not to mention that they abhor the Blue Queen so that's why they reacted that way. They could care less about the Blue Queen because they don't like her.

The next chapters shall now follow the anime. Anyway, I might post the updates later than I should because we shall be going to a vacation and the place we'll go to has no internet so...I cries.

Thank you for all your support and I assure you I would do my very best in writing the story I want to tell.