AUTHOR'S NOTE: To sophiecampbellbower: Thank you for your comments! And I totally agree with your thoughts on the annoyance of only having a single Clace kiss in City of Bones before the sibling drama happened. I guess because it's Young Adult, but the books definitely do not have enough actual sexy moments. Don't worry about it in this fic though, I've got your back! ;). Romance is in the air.
You'll also notice that I'm skipping all the Alec sexual identity crisis/drama in this fic. Imagine that he accepts that he's gay and is out to Jace and Izzy (and Clary by extension) but not his parents or anyone else. He has a tiny crush on Jace that he's aware is completely pointless and mostly would like to find a guy who might actually like him back.
CHAPTER EIGHT
I didn't hear Alec come in that night, which meant it had been late, since I had stayed up in my room drawing until past midnight.
When I woke the next morning, it was to knocking, not on my door, but a few doors down. I opened my door to see Isabelle and Jace waiting outside Alec's room.
"It's eight, Alec!" Isabelle said to the door.
"If you were out doing any inappropriate activities at all hours of the night, well, that's your own fault," Jace added in a lecturing tone. "Time to get up and greet the day!"
He glanced over and saw me. His eyes flicked me up and down, and I remembered yet again that I was still wearing clothes that Izzy had lent me.
I had slept in spandex shorts and a tank top that was skintight on her but fit normally on me, though the neckline was loose enough to reveal what little hint of cleavage I had. I had never cared what I wore, and Izzy didn't seem to mind me wearing hers, so I hadn't bothered trying to go shopping yet.
"Please do me a favor and never stop wearing Isabelle's clothes," Jace said. I blushed.
Isabelle glanced over at me upon hearing her name. "Clary! Good, now we're all here to make Alec get his ass out of bed."
"Why are we making Alec get up?" I asked.
"To tell us about his visit to Magnus's, of course!"
"He couldn't tell us in a couple of hours?"
"Thank you, Clary," Alec said, finally opening the door, apparently giving up on hoping his siblings would leave him alone. I thought that probably for the best.
His hair was tousled, he had on a white undershirt and loose sweatpants, and he glared blearily at Isabelle and Jace. "You live to torment me," he accused them.
Isabelle didn't bother arguing with that. "Well?" she demanded. "Will he do it?"
"Yes," Alec said grumpily. "For a price."
"What does he want?" Isabelle asked.
Alec scowled. "A date."
"Oh the horror," Jace said dryly.
I couldn't hold back a giggle, and Jace and Alec both glanced at me. Alec looked betrayed; Jace looked pleased. I remembered his vow to make me laugh.
"Whatever," Alec said. "Will you go away now so I can go back to sleep?"
Jace gave him a winning smile. "Nope. It's time to train."
Alec groaned and slammed the door in his face.
Neither Jace nor Isabelle looked concerned. "Ten minutes!" Jace called out to the closed door. Alec didn't bother to respond.
"Aren't you being a little hard on him?" I asked Jace. "He did do it for me."
"Fine. Half an hour!" he called over his shoulder.
"Very magnanimous," I said.
"I thought so."
I took a detour back to my room to pick up my sketchpad and change and then walked to the training room. Isabelle and Jace were already there sparring, and I took what had become my usual seat on the mats and began to draw.
"Clary's got a new one of you," Jace said as he flipped Isabelle onto her back. "In paint, this time."
She pushed him off and jumped back onto her feet, unfazed. "Awesome. Am I doing something cool in it?"
"You and Alec look like a dynamic crime-fighting duo in it, so I guess it depends on your definition of the word." He caught her fist in one hand, but she used the other to swing at his stomach. He moved out of the way, but she still got a glancing blow in. She looked pleased.
Alec joined them not long later, looking only slightly more alert, but he fell into the rhythm of sparring with Jace easily enough. Isabelle wandered away from them to pull herself up on a set of raised parallel bars.
They all looked so focused, so purposeful. I knew they weren't doing this for me, exactly, that they were doing it to fight a threat that humans didn't even know existed. But they'd unknowingly been protecting me during the long years of my life when I hadn't known about the supernatural world.
And I felt like I was so passive in this search for my mother. Finding her really only mattered to me, but I was doing the least to help out of all of them.
I wanted to do something helpful, something for someone else, for once in my life.
"I want to fight," I said abruptly, setting down my sketchpad beside me. Isabelle dropped to the floor gracefully, and Alec and Jace turned to look at me in surprise.
"Forget it, that was stupid," I said weakly, feeling embarrassed under their gazes. "I just thought..."
"It isn't stupid," Jace said, watching me with an inscrutable expression as he walked over to me. "I just didn't think it was something you'd be interested in."
"I am," I said, more firmly. "If I can."
Jace looked over at Izzy, who nodded, and Alec, who shrugged.
He turned back to me. "I'm not letting you get close to the fight," he told me. "You need years of training for that." He examined me thoughtfully, and I tried not to fidget. "But I think you'd be good at ranged weapons, since you apparently have perfect shot, at least under duress. Plus that way you can stay back so you're not touching anything."
"Why can't I just get another gun?" I asked.
Now there was a question I never thought I'd ask.
"Runes prevent gunpowder from exploding," Jace said. "No one knows why. Now that you've been Marked, you'll never be able to shoot one again."
Well, that was disappointing.
"Alec will help you. He's the long-range expert."
I couldn't help myself. "Are you admitting you're not the expert at something?"
He laughed. "I'm excellent at everything I do, Red. I just figured it would be charitable to give Alec something to do."
Alec rolled his eyes. "I can show her the bow, but I doubt she's strong enough to draw it consistently." he said. He didn't say it like he was trying to insult me, and I figured he was probably right.
"I'm thinking throwing knives or shuriken, to start," Jace said. "She can work up to the bow, if she wants."
Alec nodded.
"Ooh, I love shuriken!" Isabelle said, coming up to us. "I think they look badass."
Jace gestured me over to the weapons chests and pulled one of them open. It held a huge pile of metal disks with multiple sharply pointed ends. "Shuriken," he said. "Throwing stars. I'll get you special gloves so you don't cut yourself on them." I nodded, and he opened another chest. "And throwing knives." He picked one up to show me. It was flat on both ends and didn't have a true handle, just an unforgiving hard metal grip on one end and a thick point on the other.
He handed a few knives to me and looked at Alec, who nodded toward the far end of the room, where there were several bullseye targets set up. "Come here," Alec said, and I followed him.
He demonstrated the arm movement, the graceful, purposeful motion that used my whole body for momentum, not just my arm or fingers. Jace had returned to the punching bag, but I could feel his eyes on me from time to time.
After several minutes Alec finally let me hold one of the knives, showing me where to grip it. He let his fingers hover over mine, and I nodded to let him touch me, appreciating that he had asked. I could tell that holding the handle would give me blisters until I built up calluses. The thought of my body changing as I learned how to fight pleased me.
"Thanks, by the way," I told Alec in a low voice. "For talking to Magnus. I know you're probably doing it for Jace's sake, but thank you all the same."
"I wanted to hate you," he said just as quietly, repositioning my fingers around the ridged end of the knife. "But you're hard to hate for long. And if you hadn't needed my help I wouldn't have known what it felt like to meet someone who might actually..." He broke off, blushing. "Anyway, it's okay. I'll help you, and it has nothing to do with Jace."
I smiled, and he released my hand and stepped back. "Okay, try it."
I visualized the arm movement he had shown me and then eyed the target. Something about holding the knife felt natural, and just like when I picked up the gun, I had the strangest confidence that I could do this.
My arm released, and a second later I blinked at where the blade had landed, less than an inch to the left of bull's eye, sinking deep into the wood point first.
I turned around to see all three of them staring at me. Again.
"Should I credit your excellent teaching skills?" Jace asked his parabatai.
"Yes," Alec said dryly. "I have a real gift." I smiled.
"Come on, Red, let's see how many you can do." Jace grabbed another dozen or so knives from the chest and dropped them on the floor nearby, far enough that I wouldn't trip on them as I threw, and Alec returned to one of the punching bags.
Some of them clanged to the ground when I threw them, but only because they were hitting knives I had already sunk into the target. My fourth shot was a perfect bullseye, and none landed outside the innermost ring - until Jace was suddenly behind me, leaning down to whisper in my ear, "We need to go soon."
My whole body shivered, and that knife only landed in the second ring. I scowled up at him, making eye contact for a half-second to ensure my message was delivered. He stepped backward with a grin, his hands up and his eyes dancing. "Hey, you'll have to learn to deal with distractions in a real fight."
"Not like that!" I retorted. "Not from you!"
He laughed and walked to the target to pick up the knives that had fallen to the floor, and I stalked over and pulled out the ones that were embedded in the wood. My arm and shoulders were already aching. I was going to be sore tomorrow.
"Seriously, though," he said as he watched me drop the remaining knives in the chest. "You were amazing."
I blushed, and he gave me a satisfied smile. Stupid Shadowhunter.
An hour later, Jace, Izzy, Alec and I were stepping outside the Institute into a cool spring day. Jace and I fell into step behind his siblings, and he pulled a dagger out of his jacket and handed it to me. It shone in the sunlight and had a red jewel in its handle.
"It's not meant for throwing," he said, "though I'm sure you could manage it. I wanted you to have something as a last resort in case something – or someone – attacks you before you can throw something at it."
He handed it to me, and I thought our fingers were going to touch until he shifted them at the last second, leaving me staring down at the blade. It felt solid in my hands, balanced and deadly. "Thank you," I said, staring down at it. There was something about owning a weapon, not just using the ones in the training room, that made my situation more real to me. Now I was the type of person who needed weapons, who was prepared to fight.
"I hope you never have to use it," Jace said seriously. "You have no idea how much–" His head jerked up, and I followed his gaze.
Luke was walking toward us, looking like he was intentionally trying to appear casual and non-threatening. His shoulders were slumped, and his hair looked like he had been running his hands through it.
"I hope that's your friend," Jace said warily, putting his hand on his weapons belt. We were glamored, but I wasn't surprised that Luke could see us. Whatever he was, he was somehow connected to the Shadow world.
I couldn't stop myself from hurrying toward him, though Izzy and Alec made it to him first. They stopped a few feet in front of him and regarded him warily as I hurried past them.
Luke smiled tiredly when he saw me, but it looked genuine. "Clary," he said. He carefully reached out and squeezed my shoulder for just a second. For Luke, that was as affectionate as a hug between other people. "I was so worried." He looked at the runes visible on my arms. "I see you've discovered what you are."
"Yeah," I said uncomfortably, wondering how much different I looked to him after just a week. I still had Izzy's clothes on, all black, unlike the baggy band t-shirts I'd always stolen from Simon and my own faded, worn jeans. My hair was down, since I'd given up on trying to keep it tied back with Jace around, and my arms and collarbones, which were visible under my short-sleeved shirt, were marked with runes. I already had some scars from faded ones.
Jace had stepped up beside me. "You said you had a parabatai, but you're unmarked," he said suspiciously.
Luke sighed. "Yes, that's what happens when you turn into a werewolf."
I felt the three behind me all stiffen. I had heard references to werewolves over the past week, but I had never thought...
"How long?" I demanded.
"Ever since you've known me," Luke told me, watching me warily, like he was afraid I was going to start screaming. "Before you were born. Valentine left me to die after I transformed the first time."
"You've put her at risk, then," Jace said, his hand flexing toward his weapons belt. "Since she was a kid. Werewolves can't always control themselves, especially around the full moon," he said to me.
Luke's eyes flashed, and I almost thought I saw yellow in them for an instant.
A memory came to me suddenly, of a girl who must have been a faerie, with razor sharp teeth in her smile and dull red eyes, coming up to me while I'd been swinging with Simon at the park when we were about ten. Luke had run toward us from his seat on the park bench, and his eyes had been shining discs of yellow as he'd said something to the faerie too low for me to hear.
The girl's mouth had fallen open and she'd sprinted away, her scarlet eyes fearful, without a backward glance. The entire time Simon had been chattering to me happily as if he hadn't seen the girl.
I blinked and came back to myself. The feeling of the memory rushing over me and leaving me just as suddenly was disorienting, but it just reinforced my belief that Luke genuinely cared about me and always had.
"–know my limits," Luke was saying. "Clary is as good as my own daughter to me. Every time I thought there was the slightest risk, I stayed far from her and Jocelyn."
He glanced around, as if noticing Alec and Izzy for the first time. "You must be Lightwoods," he said. They nodded. "Twins?"
Alec looked outraged. "I'm almost two years older!"
"And I'm at least two years more mature than you," Isabelle said smugly.
Luke turned back to Jace. "I'm not sure who you are, though I believe we spoke on the phone." He looked at Jace consideringly. "You do look familiar."
Jace looked like he was considering whether or not to answer. "Jace Wayland," he said finally.
"Michael Wayland's son?" Luke asked. Jace nodded stiffly. "I knew him. He tried to leave Valentine, to leave the Circle, around the time when I did." He looked hesitant. "Is he..."
Jace grimaced. "If you're going to say 'dead', then yes. Seven years ago."
"I'm sorry," Luke said, and he sounded sincere. "He was a good man."
"Yeah, well, I have Valentine to thank for that."
"There is considerable blame, including many deaths, that can be placed at Valentine's feet," Luke said. "We're on the same side, Jace. I want to protect Clary and stop Valentine just as much as you do." He flicked another curious look at Jace, like he was trying to decipher something.
Then he turned back at me. "Clary, you should know that your mother tried to leave the Circle once she realized what Valentine's true objectives were. Don't judge her too harshly for falling for his lies. We all did. You have no idea how manipulative, how persuasive Valentine can be unless you've experienced it for yourself."
"How could she have married him in the first place?" I burst out. "He didn't turn into an evil person overnight. Why didn't she just leave him?"
Luke looked conflicted, clearly deciding how to respond. "Clary," he began finally, like he was going to tell me something he knew I wouldn't like. "Your mother and Valentine–"
Suddenly we weren't alone on the street anymore. Two middle-aged men with sneers on their faces were moving toward us, and they were surrounded by half a dozen lizardlike demons with multiple rows of pointed shark-like teeth and barbed tails.
"Lucian," the first man hissed, the demons whirling around him in a tight diameter as if they were on invisible leashes waiting to be released, "We've been waiting for you to make a mistake. You were protected by your pack of mutts at the station. Leaving them was stupid."
To my surprise, the other one turned to regard me with narrowed eyes. "And the girl," he said with a smirk. "Clarissa. Valentine will be delighted to see you."
"Blackwell, Pangborn," Luke said mildly, drawing their attention back to him before I could do much more than blink in confusion. "Still Valentine's lackeys, I see."
The second man's face turned red in rage, and suddenly he wasn't facing Luke anymore, but an enormous wolf, its teeth bared.
The wolf — Luke, I reminded myself — growled before leaping through the air toward the man. Whatever the man had been using to control the demons was released, and the demons were suddenly scuttling toward us.
It was rapidly turning into chaos, and I felt Jace's hand tight on my upper arm, pulling me backward. I couldn't bring myself to look away, wide-eyed and horrified at what I was seeing. The men were going to hurt Luke.
Except Alec and Isabelle were already there beside him, Isabelle snapping her whip around one of the men's ankles and yanking ferociously until he was being dragged face-first across the street. Alec had his bow out and was shooting the demons with perfect aim, but the demons changed their speeds rapidly, meaning half his shots sailed through suddenly open air.
I barely registered the feeling of being touched as Jace pushed me back against the wall of a building. He reached into my jacket and pulled out the dagger he had just given me, wrapping my fingers around it and pulling my arm up so that I was holding the weapon in front of my chest. "Not unless you have to," he said. I nodded numbly.
Pulling out a seraph blade, he returned to the swarming mass of demons. He seemed to be leaving Isabelle and Luke to handle the men. I heard a high-pitched, canine yowl a split second later, and my heart raced. Luke.
But even if I wanted to go to Luke against Jace's orders, I couldn't make myself move. I was frozen against the wall, my fear overwhelming me.
Jace made an impossible leap and crouched in front of the wolf's crumpled form, turning smoothly to skewer one of the demons completely.
There was a flash of light, and suddenly a doorway blazed into existence in the middle of the street. I knew it must be a Portal, and it flared open less than three feet away from the men.
The first man had been knocked unconscious from where he had hit the ground when Izzy had ensnared him with her whip, and the second man leapt sideways as if he had been expecting to see the portal in that exact location. Before Izzy could catch him with her whip, the man had grabbed his companion by the legs and thrown himself through the portal, dragging his companion along the ground behind him. A split second later, the doorway flickered and was gone.
Izzy hissed in frustration, but she turned with Alec to help Jace finish off the demons. There were half a dozen swarming around, but with the three Shadowhunters they would clearly be able to handle them. As soon as Alec dispatched the last one in a hiss of black smoke, I sprinted forward to the wolf's prone figure.
"Luke!" I dropped my dagger from loose fingers as I knelt beside the wolf on the grass. He was breathing shallowly, blood pouring from his abdomen.
"Jace," I gasped, looking around for him. "Heal him, please!"
"I can't," Jace said somberly, staring down at Luke's crumpled form. "They used silver weapons, and he can't take runes anymore. His pack will know how to take care of him." He turned to the Lightwoods. "Can the two of you take him? I don't want Clary out here if Valentine's looking for her, and we need to tell Hodge what happened."
Alec nodded, and to my amazement, he picked up the wolf, who surely weighed two hundred pounds. He must have noted my expression, because he grinned wryly. "Angel blood, remember?"
Then he and Izzy were hurrying away, and I watched Luke go, feeling utterly helpless. I had just gotten Luke back.
"Will he be okay?" I asked Jace, biting my lip hard. If I lost him just like I'd lost my mom... no. I hadn't lost her, and I wouldn't lose Luke, either. I picked up the dagger and shoved it back into my jacket.
Jace hesitated, and I appreciated that he was probably going to tell me the truth. "I think he will be," he said finally, to my enormous relief. "He should heal if they can stop the blood loss from the silver in time. They'll have people in his pack who are used to stitching their own up."
I ran a hand through my hair shakily, trying to find something to focus on besides the image of the wolf's torn body on the grass. "Why would they want Luke?"
Jace shook his head. "I don't know. Maybe punishment for leaving Valentine. Maybe because of what he could tell you about your mother." He looked at me, his expression tight with concern. "You look like you're going to pass out."
I took a deep breath. "No. No passing out. Am I going to get to fight soon?" Maybe if I'd been ready to fight we could have captured the men before they had a chance to get away.
I knew there was no point in thinking that way, but it just drove me to want to pick up the knives again as soon as possible.
Jace gave a surprised laugh. "I should have given you weapons sooner," he said. "And yes. But I have to make sure you can protect yourself first." He nodded in the direction of the Institute, only a few blocks away. "Come on, let's get back."
I needed to paint. My fear about Luke, my anger toward those men who had hurt him, would flow out through my paint brush. I didn't usually do abstracts, but maybe I would today.
"Your fingers are twitching," Jace noted as we walked. "Do you need to draw?"
"Paint," I said, trying to concentrate on my words instead of that familiar compulsion bouncing around my brain. "I need to... calm down."
"Yeah, I get that," he said as we stepped into the elevator. "I prefer to hit immovable objects and take out my anger on innocent bystanders, but it's possible that your way is more constructive."
I felt a smile twitch at the corners of my mouth. It felt weird to smile after what had just happened, but I was learning that was just what life was like as a Shadowhunter. You smiled today, because you might lose someone you loved tomorrow.
I refused to lose either my mother or Luke, though. I would do what I needed to to get them back.
Thank you for reading and reviewing! Also, question for those who are kind enough to review - can anyone let me know if there are any pet names Jace uses with Clary in canon? None are coming to mind to me, but surely there's something? Maybe?
