Phoenix woke in a warm bed, which had been the last thing he'd expected. He wanted to open his eyes but the effort seemed beyond him at the moment. Instead he listened to the sounds around him, thoughts sluggish and half-formed.
The room-the hospital room, it must be-was quiet except for one thing. Phoenix brought his cottony consciousness to bear on an evenly-paced roaring that seemed to come and go. What… He peeled one eye open to help himself out.
Snoring heavily, Larry was sitting asleep at his bedside, head tilted back and sock feet propped up on the clean hospital bed blanket.
I thought I made it to the river bank, thought Phoenix. The memory of the churning, powerful waters made his head hurt. It was so dark and cold. How did they find me?
He sat up a little. The movement woke his body, and he groaned in pain. It seemed like every inch of him was exhausted and sore.
Even though he was snoring so loudly, Larry woke at Phoenix's modest efforts to sit up. He looked into Phoenix's half-open eyes.
"Oh, Nick…" he whispered. Phoenix tried to lift a hand to wave, but it didn't make it out of the warm blanket tucked over it. He settled for as much of a smile as he could muster.
"Oh, NICK!" Larry cried, bursting into melodramatic tears. "You're back! You're alive!" He extracted Phoenix's hand from beneath the blanket and sobbed into it.
"Mmh," said Phoenix, waking up faster. "Larry…?"
"Yes, Nick? Oh, Nick, it's me! You remember me? You don't have amnesia? I asked them if you'd got amnesia and I don't remember what they said but you don't have amnesia, right? You remember me, your best friend Larry Butz? We went to school together, and I'm an artist and you're a lawyer-"
"Mhm, I can remember ev...everything, I think," Phoenix mumbled. Even his face felt as raw and achy as the rest of him.
"You do?" Larry said, his tears seeming to stop right in place.
Phoenix almost nodded, then decided it would be wiser to grunt an affirmative.
Larry's eyes flickered to the door, then to Phoenix, then to the wall behind the bed. "Well, in that case…" he began soberly. Not without some effort, Phoenix made his eyes focus on his friend's face. "Who's that cute shrine maiden you know? She looks a lot like Dahlia. And what's that lady with the whip's name? Can you introduce me?"
"Wait, what happened? Did the bridge really collapse after all?"
Larry frowned, remembering. "It was...well, yes. But it was on fire, not collapsing. I can't believe you tried to get across it, man!"
All at once, Phoenix remembered. His heart began to pound with fresh intensity. "Larry. Did...were they able to get to Maya?"
Larry shook his head, looking genuinely distressed. "I'm sorry, Nick. Bikini told us the canyon was impassible now."
Phoenix stayed silent. A desperate frustration that he was all too familiar with burned through him. He let it come and go, then sighed. That sigh set off an intense soreness in his throat and chest. Oh boy, he thought. Then, I'm lucky to be alive. Thank God.
"You know...Nick," said Larry softly. "You're lucky to be alive. It was pretty scary there when I saw you on the riverbank. If Bikini hadn't been there to help me and tell me you were alive, I...would have feared for the worst."
Phoenix smiled at his ridiculous friend. "You carried me up from the river?"
"Yeah." Larry smirked as he fully realized what he'd done. "Oh yeah, that was me! I spotted you first with my flashlight, and I carried most of you. You chose the right side of the river to wash up on!"
Phoenix chuckled, which made his eyes water in pain. "You carried 'most of me'?" he said hoarsely.
Proud, Larry nodded. "The shoulders and torso! Bikini grabbed the legs."
"Huh." Phoenix laid back and tried to imagine that scene.
Larry seemed to know what he was doing, and looked smug. Impressed at his own competence, he ably filled Phoenix's water cup from the pitcher on the tray next to the bed, and handed it to Phoenix. Gratefully, he drank it all.
"So, now what? What's going on with me?" asked Phoenix as Larry filled the cup again.
"Well, I'm told you have a fever, you're bruised all over, and you also had hypothermia, whatever that is, but now you don't anymore," Larry said with an air of crisp efficiency. "You need a few days of bedrest, and they want you to do it here just in case."
"A few days? I can't wait that long. Maya is in trouble."
"Don't worry, Nick! We're on it already. That whip lady took an interest. She's probably there right now, You still haven't told me her name."
"Prosecutor von Karma, the one and only 'whip lady'. If you cross her, she won't hesitate to use it."
"She whips people?" Larry was horrified yet intrigued at this novelty.
"Yes," said Phoenix gravely. "But, now that I know she's involved, I feel a little better." He paused, thoughtful. "Prosecutor von Karma is thorough and determined. She'll get to the bottom of this, in her own way. She has high standards for herself and others. She's just like her brother."
"Her brother? Who's that?"
"Miles Edgeworth."
"Edgey has a sister?"
"He was adopted, Larry. Remember?"
"Okay, yeah. His adopted sister. That's still good! We're friends, he can still introduce me!"
Even in his addled state, Phoenix could vividly imagine how that might go, but he didn't have enough energy to say it. He'd only been awake for a short period of time, but he could already feel his body's pull back to sleep and rest. He half-listened to Larry's chatter about cool, mysterious beauties and how much he loved them, mildly studying the black and blue bruises and assorted bandages on his hand.
Larry was circling back to Franziska von Karma when he paused.
"Wait, you said Miles Edgeworth, right?"
"Mhm."
"When we got to the hospital, I called him to let him know what happened."
Edgeworth! "Larry, he's out of the country!" Larry made an offended shrug, as if to say well no one told me! "What did you say to him?"
"I, uh…" Larry's indignance melted away as he tried to remember. "I...I was really panicking then. Um...I don't remember. I know I told him that you fell into the river."
"Oh, man." Phoenix laid back into his pillows. "Well, thank you for telling him." Even though it's probably just adding stress into his life, since he can't do anything about it but worry. I should write him an email when I feel better. I don't want to make him pay for another expensive international call. Though, it would be nice to hear his voice.
"Nick? What are you thinking about? You look kind of...gooey. Are you feeling all right?"
"Uh, yeah," said Phoenix hurriedly.
There was a heavy knock at the door. Larry sighed and started to get up, but the door opened. It was Detective Gumshoe and an enormous bouquet of blue and white flowers.
"Hey, pal!" Gumshoe left the door open and hugged Phoenix, who got a faceful of the detective's beefy shoulder. "I'm glad to see you! You look pretty roughed up, but it doesn't look half bad." said Gumshoe, drawing away with a big grin. "In fact, you look way better than most of the people I see every day."
Most of those people are dead! Phoenix thought. "Thanks, Gumshoe," he said, sounding sleepier than he intended. It caused the detective to take notice.
"I'm glad you're still here with us, buddy. Me and Prosecutor von Karma got word as soon as it happened. I've been making her investigation arrangements all day!" He held up the flowers. "These are from me and the Prosecutor. She gave me fifty bucks and told me to get a bouquet that was at least 100 dollars, or there would be consequences! Here's our note." He handed a little card to Phoenix.
Get well soon pal!
Detective Gumshoe
von Karma.
Phoenix doubted very much that she had even seen the flowers. "Thank you, Gumshoe. That was very thoughtful of you." Phoenix smiled, and the detective smiled back.
He could barely manage to hold up the little card, so he let his arm fall back down on the blankets. Gently, Gumshoe retrieved the card, and patted his hand. "You're welcome. You know, it feels weird to do a case without you around. How are you feeling?"
"Pretty beat up and tired. I think-"
Phoenix stopped at the sound of someone sprinting down the hallway outside. By the time Gumshoe turned to look over his shoulder, the person had entered.
It was Edgeworth. He stopped just inside the door, met Phoenix's eyes, and froze.
Breathless, Phoenix stared back, steadily taking in the gaze of his wayward friend like a rescuer drawing in a rope.
In his peripheral vision, Larry looked back and forth between the two. The only sound was Edgeworth's labored breathing. He couldn't seem to bring himself to look away from Phoenix.
"B-boss!" Gumshoe said finally. "You're...you brought flowers!"
"Yes." Edgeworth began to turn, but his eyes didn't follow. He looked Phoenix over, taking note of his condition, then met his tired eyes once more before looking reluctantly to Gumshoe. "Yes, I'm-I have."
He turned to look at Larry, gaze dragging over Phoenix on its way as if slowed by gravity. "Hello, Larry. It's been a while."
"Hi," said Larry automatically. "Um, I might not have told you, uh, the exact truth when I called earlier." Edgeworth's eyes narrowed, and Larry squirmed. "As you can see, Nick is...he-"
"He's exhausted, and you two have doubtless been keeping him awake," said Edgeworth sternly. He switched the bouquet to his left hand, and pointed at Larry directly between the eyes. "Please, leave this man in peace."
"I still have to give him his stuff!" Larry pointed at Phoenix's damp, muddy suit, which hung on a hook on the outside of the bathroom door.
"It's not going anywhere," said Edgeworth, an irritated edge in his voice. "Go home."
While Larry got ready to leave, the prosecutor turned to Gumshoe. The detective looked back at him hopefully.
"That applies to you as well."
"But I just got here," he protested while getting up.
Larry paused at the door. "Bye, Nick. Remember what I said about that whip lady. I'll be back tomorrow." He waved. Phoenix weakly waved back.
"Hey, boss, want me to get those flowers in a vase?" Gumshoe said helpfully, buttoning his coat. "They're really nice. They're chrysanthemums, aren't they? White chrysanthemums." He squinted at the ceiling, thinking. "Did you know that white chrysanthemums symbolize truth in Japanese flower language?"
"Yes, Detective, please do," said Edgeworth hurriedly. He held out the bouquet at arm's length, turning a bright red. Phoenix began to laugh silently.
"All right," said Gumshoe, unconcerned, and took the bouquet to lay down at the counter. "My mom had me memorize some of the flower meanings when I was in school. That's why I picked out white anemones and daisies and some blue hydrangeas. I thought white and blue would be best for you, Wright. And I thought their meanings would be awful nice." He paused in rinsing out the plastic hospital vase to turn to Edgeworth. "Mr. Edgeworth, is that why you-"
"Thank you for your help, Detective Gumshoe, but I can take it from here."
Gumshoe handed over the dripping vase.
"Good night," said Edgeworth pointedly.
Gumshoe knew better than to argue. "Get well soon, Wright," he said over his shoulder on the way out. He shut the door behind him.
An awkward silence fell.
Still a bright red, Edgeworth continued rinsing the vase, then self-consciously dried the outside with paper towels. Phoenix was shaking with gentle laughter.
"I'm glad you find your situation humorous, Wright," Edgeworth said frostily from the sink. "I must say that is the last reaction I would expect from any perceptive person such as yourself."
He glanced over his shoulder to see Phoenix's reaction, which was a sleepy grin.
More silence filled the room between filling the vase with water, and opening the little foil packet of flower food, and swilling the water until the powder dissolved, and unwrapping the cellophane and throwing it away. Through heavy eyelids, Phoenix watched his friend's every patient move.
Once the white chrysanthemums were in the vase, there was a real, blessed silence. Edgeworth placed them next to the larger bouquet, and stiffly turned to face the hospital bed again.
Phoenix's left hand lay palm down on the blankets, fingers lightly curved. He tapped the bed with his fingertips, and smiled again at Edgeworth. Edgeworth quietly moved the chair Larry had occupied closer beside Phoenix, and sat down. Phoenix turned his hand over. Edgeworth stared, dismayed that the tender palm and fingers were just as scraped and bruised at the back of his hand.
Delicately, he laid his own hand over it. He heard Phoenix sigh with relief at the touch of his cool hand. He must be burning up, thought Edgeworth.
As if he'd heard, Phoenix briefly squeezed Edgeworth's hand. Edgeworth thought he could feel the fevered heat from those fingers even after they were gone. Carefully, he squeezed in response.
"Hello, Phoenix," he whispered.
"Mmm."
Edgeworth could see that Phoenix was still looking at him, but would soon be asleep. There was so much he wanted to talk to him about, so much to share and think about together. There will be time enough for us.
"I realize you're very drowsy, Wright, but I…" He gathered his thoughts, and looked into Phoenix's face. "Are you all right?"
"Yeah," said Phoenix under his breath. "I'll be okay. Can't win against a river."
"Um...no, you can't."
Phoenix had closed his eyes, but he squeezed Edgeworth's hand again. For once, Edgeworth couldn't think of a response and sat still, staring at his pale, smooth hand resting over Phoenix's swollen fingers.
Several moments filled with Phoenix's soft, slow breathing passed by. When Edgeworth believed he was asleep, he began to stand.
When Edgeworth tried to lift his hand without waking him, Phoenix opened first one eye, then the other.
"Wait," he said under his breath again.
"Yes?"
"Yes. Something important." Phoenix curled back all his fingers but his pointer, and indicated something in front of him.
Edgeworth looked. "Your suit?"
"Pocket."
Edgeworth went over and inspected the suit's inner, outer, and pants pockets. They looked normal. Feeling a little invasive, he checked what was inside them. He turned up with a green magatama and Phoenix's defense attorney's badge.
"Here," he said, and brought them over to his friend's hand. But when he did, Phoenix folded Edgeworth's fingers over the objects in his palm with the tips of his own fingers. He tapped the prosecutor's knuckles, then let his hand rest again.
"All right," said Edgeworth, though he didn't know what it was in response to. He drew that hand to his chest, and looked at the objects again.
Even though it had only been in his hand a short while, the green magatama radiated warmth.
Edgeworth listened again to Phoenix's breathing, deep and slow. He's alive.
He put two cups full of water at Phoenix's bedside before he left.
\\\
When the day came for Phoenix to leave the hospital, his nurse could not figure out who had taken Phoenix's suit to the very expensive Italian dry cleaner in the wealthy part of the valley near the hills. Phoenix could.
\\\
Miles, are you still in your office?
SMS Feb 12 19:45
Yes. I had a very long deposition today.
SMS Feb 12 19:49
Yikes. Is it a brand-new case?
SMS Feb 12 19:50
I wish it were. They've somehow managed to drag this matter out for seven years. But I'm going to put an end to this once I've figured them out.
SMS Feb 12 19:53
I was wondering if I could stop by for a moment. It doesn't have to be tonight, though, if you're too busy.
SMS Feb 12 19:55
I have a lot of work to catch up on, but you're welcome to come visit me. Do you remember the way up?
SMS Feb 12 19:58
Yes, I remember. I'll be there shortly!
SMS Feb 12 19:58
Edgeworth had been naturally gifted with terrifying willpower, but he'd had to work and pay for the gifts of wisdom and awareness of self. When he would normally berate himself for checking the time twice in a minute when he had vital documents to interpret, he now sat back with a small sigh. How short is 'shortly'? He could be here any minute.
He looked at the clock, and picked up the transcripts again to continue reading. His eyes flickered to the clock and back.
At about ten after, Phoenix knocked on the office door.
"Come in," called Edgeworth.
Phoenix entered, already grinning. "Hello!"
"Good evening," said Edgeworth, glancing up from the documents he held in both hands.
He looked every bit like the powerful prosecutor Phoenix remembered: seated behind a large desk that looked airstrike-proof, surrounded by documents which had seals and signatures and stamps, open books filling his desk bookstand, in a room lined with intimidating law books and legal digests and a view of the city from on high out the window behind him. Everything was as he remembered it-down to the dark circles under Edgeworth's eyes.
"Wow, Edgeworth, you weren't kidding when you said you were busy. Are you doing all right?"
"Yes I am, thank you. I have been known, on occasion, to work," he said, and coolly returned to the documents to write a note.
Phoenix laughed, and then he saw it-the spark of humor in his friend's eyes, which he tried to hide by looking down. The sheer pleasure of making his friend happy made Phoenix laugh again.
"You're in a good mood," Edgeworth observed. He put down his pencil and tapped the documents on his desk to neaten them. "What brought you to my office tod-tonight?"
Edgeworth looked up at him, and it caused the hearth fire in Phoenix's heart to burn hotter momentarily, distracting him. "Well, um." He came a little closer across the room. Edgeworth watched him patiently.
Phoenix scratched his ear and pulled himself together. "I wanted to thank you for investigating right away on my last case, at Hazakura Temple. I didn't really set you up for success, but you were wonderful despite that. You were a tremendous help. Thank you. I could not have saved Maya without you."
"You're welcome, Wright." Edgeworth's cheeks flushed a light pink. He looked away to paperclip the documents, and filed them. "I'm glad it turned out well, and that you are looking healthier. However, it was awful to represent the defense. I don't think I could bring myself to ever do it again." Though he tried to hide it, Phoenix could see him smirking.
"It was that bad?"
"A humiliating experience."
"Ah."
"I have never known such ridicule in my life."
Phoenix snickered, and when he didn't say anything Edgeworth looked up. Their eyes met, both shining, both warm with the feeling between them.
Muddled by his affection and feeling his face turn hot, Phoenix tried to think of something to say. "Yeah...that's…that's my...um…"
Edgeworth laughed once, gently. Though he looked away again, his smile still lingered.
Phoenix Wright wanted nothing more than to bask in this glow, forever.
Edgeworth scooped up another set of documents. "I still have some testimony I need to work on, but you can stay until I finish, if you like."
"Are you sure?"
They looked at each other.
"Well, yes. I wouldn't want to waste your time, but…" Edgeworth looked him in the eye and said shakily, "It's nice to have you in the room with me."
"O-oh!" Phoenix stammered. A sweet, wild fear filled him and receded, like lightning going to ground. It could have been the desk lamp, but Phoenix was pretty certain he'd never seen Edgeworth this red before. And he was just as certain he'd never been as well.
"Uh, well," his voice cracked, "in that case, I'd love to stay." He nodded.
Edgeworth nodded. "Oka-please do," he managed.
Belatedly, Phoenix added, "I like being here too."
"Ah, I see." Edgeworth looked to his papers.
Phoenix took his chance to turn around and lift his gaze to the ceiling. Oh, my God.
He pretended to look at the books on the wall around the doorway until his heart stopped pounding. When it did, he began to actually see the books therein. He noticed that they were covering a wide range of subjects, but there were only perhaps three or four per topic. Sailing, geology, clothing and fashion, foreign languages, domestic animals, physics, psychology, world cultures, art, electronics, healthcare, meteorology, gardening, do-it-yourself manuals, and more-all arranged, he noticed as he looked, by the Dewey decimal system. He picked one of the shelves and looked through. Though most of the library was composed of state and Supreme Court law digests, Phoenix felt free to ignore them and glance over practical information about Internet modems instead.
Sampling Edgeworth's library took the better part of three hours. Somewhere in the middle of it, Phoenix turned to the desk. Edgeworth was leaned deeply over the surface, his left elbow planted past the page in front of him and his brow resting in that hand. The other hand was writing a list of some kind.
Phoenix smiled fondly at the sight. Look at him go.
Edgeworth seemed to sense that he was being watched. He paused, wrote a little more, then looked up. "Yes? What is it, Phoenix?"
He shook his head. "Nothing, nothing. Hey, do you want some water or something? You've been working for a long time." While Edgeworth paused to consider, he added, "Did you have any dinner?"
"Mmm, no."
"No?"
"I don't need any water, and I wasn't hungry at dinnertime."
"Oh! Well, in that case, I've got a granola bar in my briefcase for just this type of situation."
Edgeworth didn't protest as Phoenix produced his emergency snack and handed it across the desk.
"Thank you, Wright."
"No problem." Phoenix picked up the wilderness survival manual he'd seen last, and sat on the couch. It was apparent to him that his friend had been hungrier than he'd realized. The bar was gone in no time.
When he was done, the prosecutor brushed crumbs from his fingertips neatly into the wrapper. "Thank you, that was just what I needed."
Phoenix smiled in response, and the two went back to reading.
At approximately 23:20, Phoenix was looking up at the shelves again. They went all the way to the ceiling. From the sounds of things, Edgeworth was wrapping up his work for the night. Phoenix picked out a book on civil engineering. Maybe I'll finally be able to answer Pearly's question about the train's middle rail.
He was leaning back against that bookshelf when Edgeworth stood and snapped off the desk lamp with a sigh. Phoenix gave a mild smile, and Edgeworth smiled wearily back.
"You've got a really great library in here," said Phoenix as the prosecutor crossed the room. "You have a gentleman's knowledge of most things. Now I see where that knowledge came from."
Edgeworth stood next to Phoenix on his left. Together, they looked over the books. "Thank you. That was a thoughtful compliment."
"You're welcome," said Phoenix with a quick smile at his friend. He turned to look back at the books.
We're standing so close together. He tried to think of something casual and warm to say, but the more silence there was, the more aware he became that they were alone in this room, standing so close to each other in utter privacy.
Phoenix saw Edgeworth's shoulders and back in his mind's eye and couldn't help thinking about how close he was to them, or how close their hands must be to touching. How it would feel to hold him and rest his chin on his shoulder. How fitting and charming that scent of white bar soap was. How soft his fine grey hair would feel if he could put a hand over the back of Edgeworth's head.
Edgeworth was looking at him. That sweet fear held Phoenix's tongue in place as he turned to meet his gaze.
"Wright…" Edgeworth began, then trailed off into intentional silence.
Phoenix smiled, and with a shyness he hadn't expected, spread his arms slightly. "Wanna hug it out?"
Miles turned bright red, but seemed not to notice it. "What on earth does that mean?" he whispered, eyes darting about the office as if someone might see them.
"It's like the ultimate hug," Phoenix whispered back. "I'll show you."
Miles stepped closer, and then it was happening-Phoenix's arms encircled the man he loved, his oldest friend. Miles held himself apart, tense, and so Phoenix touched him lightly. That care that he took didn't stop Phoenix from soaking in the sensation of their bodies touching, when they'd touched so little before. In his arms Phoenix could feel that Miles was toned and fit-climbing the stairs everywhere you went would do that to a man-but not so much that he was uncomfortably solid. Yes, he was solid in a way, but he was…
He's soft, Phoenix marveled, and a feeling too intense to name burned brightly inside him. He resisted the impulse to hold Edgeworth tighter.
They stayed like that for some moments. Phoenix was wondering if he could rest his chin on the red-jacketed shoulder beneath it when he felt Edgeworth pull him in closer. Now Phoenix could feel Miles' chest rise and fall against his with their every breath. Miles' touch was strong and solid, but so very comfortable. Can someone's touch be called respectful? Phoenix thought, and got his affirmative answer as Miles settled a little more into Phoenix's embrace. Phoenix took that as a good sign to set his chin lightly on the inside of Miles' shoulder, near his neck. There was that white bar soap scent again. Phoenix closed his eyes. Miles sighed, a sound somewhere between relief and relaxation.
He didn't keep track of how long it lasted, but eventually Miles moved a little in Phoenix's arms. Phoenix let him go, and as naturally as if they did it all the time, they separated and looked into each others' eyes. Though Miles' eyes were gentle, they were still his-grey, and intense.
Miles blinked, and smiled. Likewise, Phoenix closed his eyes briefly and, grinning, opened them, feeling like he'd woken up from a daydream. Before him, Miles was still looking at him, as if waiting for him to say something.
"Wow," Phoenix said, and chuckled softly for the sheer pleasurable feeling he was filled with.
"Thank you, Phoenix," said Miles. There was a wry, knowing glint in his eye. "That was nice."
"Yes," he agreed, his brain seeming to activate upon hearing a complete sentence. "That felt nice." Phoenix laid a hand gently on Miles' upper arm. "But you must be exhausted right now," he said earnestly.
Miles smiled. "I feel pretty good at this moment." He paused, and Phoenix took his hand away. "I might have fallen asleep if we'd hugged any longer."
"Really?" asked Phoenix, grinning. Miles nodded. They looked away from each other briefly, and Phoenix laughed sheepishly.
"I take it you noticed the black circles under my eyes," said Miles, still looking down at the aviation books by their waists. "I just saw them this afternoon myself."
"Yeah, I noticed them. You work so hard." Phoenix looked steadily at Miles' left temple, just above the now-pinkish left ear. He kept looking until Miles tore his gaze away from the library and back to Phoenix.
"What is it?" Miles asked, sounding slightly less obstinate than usual.
"Could I kiss you?"
Miles' face burned with a vivid flush again. "Hm," he said in a strangled voice. "Just a little."
Phoenix did.
"I'm happy you're back," Phoenix said softly. "I missed you, a lot. Your return and your help at the Temple was...it was so important to me. You are important to me."
He kissed Miles again on the cheek, and kept Everything is right, I am right, when we're together to himself.
"Wright," Miles said, fond but stern. "There's something you're leaving out. I saw you swallow that thought. You can tell me." He touched Phoenix's shoulder briefly. "Remember when you told me what Maya said to you about friendship? Well, it goes both ways."
Phoenix nodded. "I remember." He looked at Miles, then away. "I didn't say it because I don't know how you feel. I don't want you to feel guilty, or obligated to feel something you don't, just because I feel a certain way. I don't want to trap you into something you don't want, or hold a power over you. Really, it's all right. I can keep it private. I'm strong enough."
"Yes you are, Phoenix. I do not doubt that."
Phoenix looked up. Miles was looking to him, neutral, waiting to see what he would do. Phoenix had to look away.
"I was...I was really lonely without you. I love you-" His voice stopped in his throat.
He swallowed and started again. "I had Maya and Pearl, and I love both of them so much. They are my family and that's how I always want it to be. But you…" Phoenix crossed his arms over his torso. "You are different. When we're together, I feel like I have a place in this world. Like my life is meaningful. I feel alive when I'm together with you, or Maya, or Pearl, and I..." Phoenix lifted a hand to cover his face, moved by something unbearable.
In his peripheral vision, Phoenix saw Miles start to move closer.
"Wait," said Phoenix, and took a shuddering breath to calm his tears. He felt very fragile.
"I...so…" He took his hand away and wrapped his arm back tightly around himself, shaking slightly. "I was in a lot of pain when you were gone. Both times, they were really different. Um, but...the pain taught me some important things about myself and I had to learn how to do things differently. I'm not just saying that to make myself feel better or anything. No wisdom or strength comes without a price-you know as well as I do. God, don't we all, we've all been through so much." His eyes flickered up from the floor to Miles, and back.
"If I had to choose whether or not to go through it again, I would choose it. This was the only way things could have happened-the way they should have happened. Your travels were the best thing for you to do, just like sharing my life with Maya and Pearl was for me. But being apart from you hurt a lot. I never imagined it would...that I needed you so much."
He paused, and took another shuddering breath. "I guess that's it. I'm sorry. I didn't want to tell you because I didn't want to hurt you and make you feel guilty. But...that's it." He looked up.
Miles' expression was muted. When Phoenix met his eyes he knew that Miles could see every emotion that was tangled in his heart. Phoenix had to look away from that perceptive gaze.
There was silence between them. Out in the courthouse square, the clock struck midnight.
"Phoenix," said Miles softly, to bring his attention back. Reluctantly, Phoenix looked. This time, he was the one offering an embrace.
Phoenix quickly took it, and this time he didn't hold back. He wrapped his arms tightly around the man he loved so deeply. After a moment of initial surprise, Miles held Phoenix just as closely. It was wonderful, as if they were trying to press themselves together into one.
"Did you know," Miles murmured into Phoenix's shoulder, "that I never saw my mentor cry?"
"Never?" Phoenix gently buried his fingers under Miles' soft, fine hair. It felt even better than he'd imagined.
"Never. Not at a funeral, not at a graduation or ceremony. He never shared his feelings or emotions with me or Franziska. He almost never laughed or smiled, but he certainly never cried. For many years, I thought that made him strong, and I wanted to be just like him."
Phoenix relaxed into the embrace. "I remember that."
"But tonight I saw true strength. You told me what you truly felt, despite the fact you were absolutely terrified. You placed that risk completely in my hands. You're an incredible man, Phoenix."
"Thank you," Phoenix said into the part of his shoulder where he'd rested his face. They stood together, leaning into each others' warm weight.
Phoenix let it soothe him.
After a time, Miles said, "You are an exceptionally soft and comfortable individual."
Caught off guard, Phoenix laughed, an action which made Miles bounce slightly as well. "I was just thinking the same thing about you."
"About me? Are you certain?"
"Positive." He stood up a little, and they let go. When their eyes met this time, it was in pure warmth. "I'm a difficult measuring stick to go up against, though," he said, looking down and laying a hand over his stomach. "I have this soft tummy, like Pearl said, but I gather that I'm pretty soft all ove-"
The last word of his sentence ended up mushed against Miles' cheek, right beside his lips as Miles kissed him. Miles had gone in for a quick peck but, like many rookie marksmen, had closed his eyes at the last minute. Edgeworth's lips fairly bounced off his cheek, and Phoenix giggled.
"I didn't know that you would continue talking!" Miles protested. Phoenix degraded into full-blown laughter, and after a few seconds Miles couldn't help but join in. Smiling, they looked at each other.
Phoenix laid a hand on Miles' face, and they both leaned in for a kiss. One, two, three quick kisses, like a firecracker beginning to ignite. They lingered near each other, and Phoenix rested his forehead against Miles'.
"We should really be going," Phoenix said. "I've kept you out way too late."
"Let me drive you home."
"If you insist."
"I do."
"Thank you."
They kissed once more, and gathered their things.
\\\
The next night, Phoenix was fast asleep when his cell phone chimed on the bedside table. Nowadays, he kept it on throughout the night. Without opening his eyes, he felt for the phone on the table and turned on the screen. He angled it slightly away and cracked open one eye.
Are you at your apartment? If you were asleep, please disregard this message.
SMS Feb 14 01:21
Um… Phoenix's sleepy mind struggled with his friend's straightforward caveat. I don't usually disregard his...words, but...I suppose I'm not asleep anymore. Uh…
He opened his other eye and sat up to text back. Yeah, that logic would never stand up in court.
Yep, I'm at home, going to bed. What's going on?
SMS Feb 14 01:27
May I spend the night at your place?
SMS Feb 14 01:29
That got Phoenix's attention. He sat up, heart pounding, and started at the tiny letters of the text. What…!?
Of course, you're welcome to come over! Is everything all right?
SMS Feb 14 01:31
Yes, I'm all right. I just had another long day today and I can't seem to sleep very peacefully. I remembered how relaxed I was when you visited my office and thought it would be a good idea to try replicating the scenario.
SMS Feb 14 01:34
I'm on my way now. Can you send me your new address?
SMS Feb 14 01:37
It's in the same parking lot, but along the east side. I'm in 2140. I'll send you the address again.
SMS Feb 01:38
Holy shit, Phoenix thought while typing out his mailing address. I thought Edgeworth would never go this quickly into a relationship.
He sent the text and rubbed his eyes as he got out of bed. I should make sure Maya and Pearl's old bed is fit for sleeping in, just in case.
Phoenix turned on the kitchen light as he passed through, half-closing his eyes, and went through the living room and up the stairs to the loft bedroom. Halfway up, he stopped. His heart began to pound as an unwelcome thought occurred to him.
He doesn't mean he wants to have sex...does he?
Rattled, he continued upstairs slowly. No, of course not. I saw it yesterday myself, he truly is exhausted. But maybe he wanted to use it to relax? Could that be it?
He pulled out his cell phone again to look over the texts in question, and flipped on the loft light located at the top of the stairs. Would it even be normal to at this point? We've hardly kissed, but… While walking over to the bed, he studied the words. I...I just don't know. I have no idea.
Phoenix checked the pastel pink cherry blossom motif comforter, and gave the sheets on the bed a quick peek. I put these on the morning after they left. It should be fine. Phoenix opened the closet a little in case Miles brought over some hanging clothes, and checked the green and white bathroom. I guess I cleaned this too. It looks good. Absently, he centered and straightened the rug with his foot.
I suppose I should prepare for the worst and hope for the best. I don't have a whole lot of practice coming out. The only other person I've come out to turned out to be grey-asexual. It was probably different with Maya because she personally understood what I was saying. He looked at the silk pink roses Maya had left to decorate the mirror. Miles may not.
Phoenix left the bathroom light on and turned on the bedside lamp. He switched off the bright loft light. There, that looks inviting. He went back downstairs and sat on the couch to wait. While watching the clock he rehearsed all the things he might need to tell Miles.
I'm asexual and biromantic. You see, there are different types of attraction, but social pressures and media messages cultivate us into thinking they're all one and the same. I've known I was asexual since I was in college. I saw it in a pamphlet and read about it and finally everything made sense. I can be romantically attracted to men and women. Yes, I have always felt this way. I've...it's who I am. I've always been this way, I just didn't know there were words to describe it. I have never wanted to have sex with someone. I've never seen or met someone and thought about having sex with them, or even thought that my lack of sexual attraction was strange in any significant way. This applies to us as well. I love you, and unless you very, very, very much want to, we will never have sex. Do you understand? I am romantically and aesthetically and platonically attracted to you. I know it sounds a little silly when I put it that way, but we just don't have the necessary vocabulary in our society to reflect our experiences. Romantic attraction is different from platonic because...uh…
Phoenix's train of thought ground to a halt at that difficult, fraught explanation every time, and then circled back to the beginning. He sat on the couch, waiting and fretting, until there was a polite knock at the door.
He leapt up and checked through the peephole. It was Miles, in his heavy black wool coat, and holding a briefcase. Phoenix opened the door, admitting a draft of freezing air along with his friend.
"Hello," said Miles. "Thank you for allowing me to come over."
"Hi." Phoenix shut and locked the door. "No problem. Want me to take your coat?" He looked into Miles' face. "Oh, my goodness."
"Wright, please," Miles sighed. The dark circles under his eyes stood out like bruises, and his skin was pallid, almost grey. His eyes were red-lined and puffy, and the gaze in them lacked its usual intensity. They seemed obscured by a fog.
"Miles." Phoenix hugged him briefly, coat and all
When he pulled away, Miles was rolling his eyes. "Don't be dramatic. This is...I'm accustomed to this."
Phoenix held out a hand for his briefcase, shaking his head. Miles handed it to him, and took off his coat. Underneath he was wearing his customary red suit. He took off his shoes and traded Phoenix his coat for the briefcase.
Phoenix moved further into the apartment and hung the coat on the same coat tree from his old place. Behind him, Miles entered the living room and took in the small apartment. "Have Maya and Pearl left already?"
"Yes, they've gone to continue their training." Phoenix came back to stand next to him "Their room is ready, if you'd like."
Miles made a tired chuckle, and closed his eyes, smiling.
"What? What did I say?" asked Phoenix.
Miles rubbed an eye. "Phoenix, I meant for us to...sleep...be in the same bed. My purpose in coming over was to test if the relaxation I felt from-" he looked at Phoenix and grinned wryly, "-'hugging it out' could be useful in getting to sleep."
Relief swept through Phoenix. "You mean...Oh. So like, cuddling?"
"That's what I had in mind."
Phoenix couldn't stop his huge, goofy grin. "Really?"
"Really. Yes. Now, I've brought pajamas and a hanger for my suit. I have a meeting with a judge scheduled for tomor-today at 6 in the morning, so I'll need to leave immediately from here. I'll need to set an alarm, is that all right?"
"Sure, yes. I'll get up too."
"There's no need. I've interrupted your sleep already."
"Wh-how did you know?"
Miles gestured to Phoenix's pajamas and messy hair.
"Oh, yeah. You caught me." He waved a hand dismissively. "It's no big deal."
"All right. Good, then," said Miles somewhat formally. "I will change and hang up my things upstairs." He began to move toward the stairs, and stopped.
"Is...this okay? Are you okay with this?" He met Phoenix's eyes, serious.
"Miles, I love you. I'm really-I'm really happy about this."
"Okay." Miles nodded, and walked past Phoenix and up the stairs.
Oh my gosh. Phoenix checked his bedroom and bathroom, a little nervous, to make sure they were presentable. He fluffed the pillows and neatened the pile of books on his bedside table. Maybe he'll want something to drink? After getting a glass of cool water and pacing aimlessly around the kitchen, he returned to the bedroom. Get a grip, Phoenix! It's just cuddling!
Presently, Miles appeared at the door with an embarrassed smile he was trying to fight down.
Phoenix gave a nervous chuckle. "Ah, of course. Silk pajamas."
"What about them?" he said with false crossness. Phoenix laughed, and sat on the bed.
"Nothing bad. They're just like you. That's a good thing." He patted the other side of the bed. "Here, that's the good side of the bed." He watched Miles come over and pull the blankets up to lay under. "You wouldn't want to get up on the wrong side of the bed tomorrow if you're meeting with a judge."
Miles sighed heavily at the pun. "Don't make me regret this."
Phoenix snickered.
They climbed under the covers together. Phoenix nestled in while Miles lay flat on his back. Phoenix looked over at him, and they paused a moment.
"So...how should we do this?" said Phoenix.
"Um…"
They burst into embarrassed laughter. Phoenix turned on his side and lifted his arm. "Come on over here." He patted Miles' shoulder and waved him closer. "I believe some spooning is what you had in mind."
"I wouldn't know about that," Miles mumbled, rolling over to face away from Phoenix, who settled his arm over Miles' side and waited for him to get comfortable. They mutually adjusted pillows, and Phoenix pulled the comforter over them.
"What are you going to do with your hand?" asked Miles once Phoenix laid down again.
"Hold one of yours, probably. Oh, I forgot about the light."
Miles groaned and began to move. "Never mind, I got it," said Phoenix. He propped himself up on his elbow and reached mightily over Miles to switch off the lamp.
A pleasant darkness fell, like cool water. Phoenix settled in beside Miles and gathered him close. Over the Dove bar scent was the dried-sweat smell of exhaustion and old worry. Phoenix sighed contentedly, and felt about the covers for one of Miles' hands.
Miles lifted his arm, and laid a hand over Phoenix's. He paused when he touched the remaining bandage. "Are you sure?" asked Miles. "You've only been out of the hospital just recently."
"I'm pretty much healed." He chuckled. "Nothing stopped us from hugging the other night. And you're always so gentle."
"Mm," said Miles in a way that told Phoenix he was probably a little flushed. Phoenix kissed his shoulder and snuggled in a little closer.
They laid quietly for a while in the dark bedroom. Phoenix watched Miles' chest rise and fall with his breathing. Above them and in the hallway, the heater turned on.
Eventually, Miles grew still and warm beside Phoenix. His hand was warm and a little damp in Phoenix's. I guess even Miles Edgeworth can get sweaty hands like any other mortal.
Phoenix closed his eyes, and moved his hand slightly so that their fingers were laced together instead. "Goodnight," he whispered.
\\\
When the alarm went off a few hours later, Phoenix was surprised that Miles didn't wake immediately. Phoenix sat up and rubbed his eyes. Next to him, Miles groaned so vaguely that Phoenix couldn't help but chuckle.
"Mmm. Don't make fun of me," Miles mumbled. He rolled over onto his back and rubbed his eyes.
Phoenix patted his shoulder, which was still delightfully warm. "No, never. I'll get some coffee started."
"Thank you," Miles said around his hands, still rubbing his face.
Once Phoenix had peeled himself out of bed and started the coffee brewing, though, Miles was a lot quicker to wake up. He appeared in the hallway entrance to the kitchen as Phoenix searched through his cabinets for breakfast options. "Hey there," said Phoenix, glancing over his shoulder.
Miles stepped a little closer, then stopped. "Good morning. Phoenix, you don't have to make me breakfast. I can get something on the way."
"Don't worry about it. I'm making breakfast anyway. You should probably go get ready."
He hesitated. "Well...all right."
"I remember from the sleepovers we had when we were little that you liked toast and jam for breakfast." He turned to look at Miles, smiling. "Is that still the case?"
Miles smiled, slow and thoughtful. "Yes, it is." They looked at each other for a moment. Then, Miles sighed. "I had forgotten about those sleepovers. That's right. You and Larry would visit my house."
"It was a long time ago," Phoenix said. He took out two slices of bread. "Maybe you'll remember more while you get dressed."
"Mm," said Miles, and made his way upstairs.
By the time they sat down at the breakfast table, both were dressed and awake.
"I kinda miss your fluffy bedhead," said Phoenix as he laid out the dishes.
Miles touched the back of his head, where a little lock of hair always stood out. "You mean this?" He pressed it down, but it just sprang back. "It never obeys me."
"Nope, that's definitely there to stay."
Miles shook his head, and poured the coffee into their mugs. They ate in companionable silence, occasionally glancing through the newspaper Phoenix had brought in. Phoenix made a mental note to tell Maya that Miles had used her souvenir mug from Très Bien.
Miles noticed him looking. What is it? his face seemed to ask.
"You look well-rested," said Phoenix. "Did you get enough sleep?"
"Yes. It was an absolute...it was exactly what I needed." Miles glanced over Phoenix. "You also seem to have recuperated."
"Yep. I'm still a little tender in some places, but I feel fine."
"I'm glad to hear it."
Phoenix sipped his coffee. He thought briefly of Godot. The memory passed as he looked at the other prosecutor across the table from him.
"Remember how we used to play board games?"
Miles looked up a Phoenix's grin, and responded with a soft one of his own. "Yes, we played all sorts." He glanced away, then back. "I almost always won, but you never wanted to stop playing. You did win a few times, but you never gave in."
"Playing chess with you was rough, I will admit." The memory made Phoenix fond. "We played for hours. I remember our parents would bring us lunches and we would eat while still playing."
Miles nodded. "We were either doing that or sitting at the piano. You weren't half-bad as a partner in those four-handed pieces."
"Really?"
He chuckled. "Yes. Did you know I still play piano?" Phoenix shook his head. "Manfred had me take lessons, but I always enjoyed playing music. I haven't lost the habit."
"Miles, that's great! I always admired it." Phoenix finished his coffee. "We had a lot of fun back then."
"Yes, we did." Miles checked his watch. "I must be going." He got up, and started picking up his dishes.
Phoenix got up along with him. "Leave those dishes. I'll take care of it."
By walking him to the door, Phoenix was able to score a goodbye kiss.
\\\
The day after that, Miles asked if Phoenix would come visit him at home, and if so, how soon. They scheduled a dinner for the next day. From the tone of his texts, Phoenix thought it could possibly be an urgent, serious matter, but knew it was hard to tell with Miles.
As he rode the train to the rich part of town, Phoenix couldn't help but remember how he felt before their first dinner together after Edgeworth's acquittal. A lot has happened since then. Gosh, that was when Maya and I hardly knew each other.
When he came up from the station, Phoenix searched for Miles in the crowds. He spotted him standing unobtrusively by a shop window, frowning. Even at this distance, Phoenix could tell something was weighing heavily on his mind. He felt a prickle of concern. Maybe something is going on after all. He walked over, eager.
"Hi!" he called as he approached.
Miles looked relieved. "Hello, thank goodness you're here. It's so crowded, I thought I'd never see you."
Phoenix tried not to laugh. "It's not too busy right now. Are you unused to crowds?"
"I usually drive," he said by way of explanation, and frowned stubbornly. "I've only been here a handful of times."
"I understand," said Phoenix. He stepped a little closer. "Let's get in your car so I can hold your hand."
Miles' cheeks turned pink. "Yes, let's."
The drive didn't contain as much hand-holding as Phoenix had been hoping-the way to Miles' home on a hill was winding. But once they arrived Phoenix forgot all about it.
"What?! This is your house?" Phoenix exclaimed as they pulled up to the garage. Once inside, he saw the luxurious interior, the grand piano, the walls of books and sheet music, and the view of the valley, all upon entering from the garage. His jaw dropped. "Miles!"
Miles couldn't help himself. He broke into laughter. "I'm sorry, Phoenix, your face…"
Phoenix spluttered. "Oh my God, Miles. This is...this is something else!"
"The devastatingly articulate defense attorney returns," Miles teased. "Would you like something to drink, or are you more in need of smelling salts?"
"Yes," he answered. Miles shook his head, chuckling, and went to get him some water. Phoenix looked around a moment, then followed. He watched Miles retrieve a crystal-clear glass from the cabinet, and marveled at the expensively appointed kitchen. "I mean, I knew it would be nice, don't get me wrong. But all this…!" He gestured helplessly. "Wow. And it's all just for you?"
"Yes." Miles came over to give him the water. Their hands touched briefly. "I handpicked this house when the time came for me to live on my own." He tapped his temple, eyebrows raised. "Remember when I visited your apartment for the first time? You gave me a tour."
Phoenix laughed. "I'll never forget that. It was tense!"
"You're right, it was. How about I give you a tour, since this is your first visit?"
First visit? Does that mean there will be more? Phoenix nodded, and followed Miles from the kitchen.
He seems to have calmed down a little since we got here. Maybe I took his mind off of whatever it is. Oh, I guess we're saving the piano with a view for last.
Miles showed him the two spacious guest rooms, the office-bigger and more impressive than the entire Wright and Co. Law Offices put together-and his own neat, sophisticated bedroom.
"Do you often have guests to stay in the rooms?" asked Phoenix as they returned to the living room.
"No, not very often." They stopped beside the piano, and looked out over the valley.
It was dark already. In the distance, the foggy mass of sky over the ocean seemed to press snugly against the city.
Miles watched Phoenix's face as he looked at the view before them. He felt the nervous knot in his stomach tangle again, and steeled himself.
"This house-your house-is amazing. Thanks for inviting me," said Phoenix, turning to look at Miles. Phoenix smiled up at him, and stayed still in a way that Miles was coming to learn meant he was hoping for a kiss.
With effort, Miles looked away, guilt twisting in his gut. He suppressed that sensation, and made it into a casual glance out the window. I will tell him soon enough, he thought. And then, it won't matter. It will all be over.
There was an uncomfortable silence.
Ever graceful, Phoenix said, "This piano is way bigger than the other one we used to play on."
When Miles turned back, he saw the other man was looking at him, gentle, and attentive in a way that told Miles he hadn't missed his brief struggle.
Miles took the lifeline that Phoenix had thrown. "It most certainly is. It takes up a bit more room than that upright." He glanced at the piano, then at Phoenix. "Would you like to hear a little?"
Phoenix's eyes shone. "I'd love to, but only if you want to."
"I don't mind at all," said Miles with a small smile.
He went to the piano, and lifted the cover over the keys. When he sat down, he moved over and patted the bench on his left.
"Are you sure?"
Miles nodded, and Phoenix eagerly perched on the edge of the bench.
The Entertainer was the first thing that came to mind. Phoenix recognized it within the first few bars, and laughed when he did. He watched Miles' hands and fingers, and held his breath every time Miles' left arm came close to him. The act of playing seemed to calm Miles once more, bringing his mind back to the present reality.
When it was over, Phoenix clapped lightly. Miles chuckled, and played the final tonic chord again in several octaves. "Thank you." He turned on the bench to face Phoenix.
"I invited you over tonight to express my gratitude for your assistance in getting me to sleep the other night, and for being so hospitable. I thought it would be nice to prepare a dinner for you, as a way of saying thanks."
"That sounds like a wonderful idea, but I really liked having you over. There's no need to thank me when I enjoyed it so much." He paused. "Does that disqualify me from dinner?" He looked into Miles' eyes, expectant, trying to keep a straight face.
Miles shook his head. "No. Nice try." Phoenix grinned.
He followed Miles into the kitchen, watching him work and making idle conversation about the city until he stepped in to wash the spring greens. Miles asked him to take over the salad and please chop the onions, and they fell into a comfortable and natural cooperation.
By the time the wine was drunk and the dinner eaten, Phoenix had discovered that he could definitely get used to this. They'd reminisced about school, and Phoenix had explained the daily routine of living with the Feys, and Miles had talked about his visit with Franziska and Adrian, and the atmosphere and company had engulfed Phoenix with the warm feeling of intimacy he was always chasing. He could feel it in his heart as the hearth fire grew larger, settling deeper.
It seemed that Miles felt the same way. His eyes hadn't stopped shining with that special affection Phoenix had first seen in the prosecutor's office. In Phoenix's company, he was looser, more expressive, and best of all to Phoenix, he would smile.
As the dinner wound down, though, he began to change. Phoenix could see the return of troubling thoughts weighing his friend's mind. He did his best to keep the mood light, even getting a grin out of Miles when he pled for help with the most technologically advanced dishwasher he'd ever seen after insisting on doing the dishes. But as Phoenix rinsed and scrubbed he could feel it wasn't going to last.
He let silence fall. He'd found it was the best way to get Miles comfortable enough to say what was on his mind. It also freed Phoenix to ruminate, for better or worse.
What could it be? Is it related to me? It seemed like he wanted to stretch out our dinner as long as possible. It must be serious if he's this worried.
And it is something he wanted to talk about almost immediately after spending the night. Phoenix mulled over what had transpired. Is it possible he invited me over because he wants to sleep with me? Am I just jumping to conclusions? Would now be the customary time? He did make me dinner and all. He must be really nervous.
I'm going to have to come out to him. I have to tell him tonight. It wouldn't be right to put it off any longer.
Phoenix sobered up quickly as his feelings of dread congealed at the bottom of his gut. His heart began to pound. I wish this didn't have to happen tonight, after we had such a nice time. But all I have to do is take a leap and hold on tight until it's over with.
The depth of silence between them began to stand out. Phoenix closed the dishwasher and dried his hands, all while rehearsing what he needed to say twice as fast as he had three nights ago. When he looked up, Miles was staring at him intently.
"Let's sit down. I need to talk to you about something," said Miles, his voice flat with tension.
Phoenix nodded, his mouth suddenly dry. Oh my God. What if this ruins everything?
He might not understand, no matter how much I explain. What if he doesn't even want to talk to me after this? What if he thinks that I'm making things up and that I don't love him?
They went to the table, and they sat.
Miles laced his fingers together on the table in front of him, then unlaced them and gripped his hands together in a small, tight clamp. Unconsciously, Phoenix imitated him by laying his hands over each other to keep them from shaking.
"There's something I need to tell you," Miles said, and cleared his throat.
"Me, too," said Phoenix. "But you first."
Miles nodded, once, and his gaze dropped to the table. "I'm asexual."
A moment of silent shock, and then Phoenix couldn't help it. He burst into tears.
When he'd gotten good and started, though, he inexplicably started to laugh. Miles turned bright red, dismayed, and perhaps a little frightened.
"Um, Phoenix? Are you all right?" He started to reach across the table, then stopped. Phoenix took his hand and held it tight while drying his tears with the other. Miles didn't dare do much else. Cautiously, he watched for what Phoenix would do next.
"Oh my God, Miles, you have no idea-you're-" Another laughing sob escaped him. "I'm…"
He laughed, the only possible thing to do with all these bright emotions burning within him. He dried his eyes again, and squeezed Miles' hand.
"What's so funny?" Miles asked, bewildered.
Phoenix told him.
\\\
The next day was a Friday. Phoenix and Maya had made tentative plans for a weekend visit, and by early afternoon he got a voicemail saying she and Pearl should arrive at the train station by Phoenix's apartment just before dinnertime. If Phoenix's joy had made him ecstatic before, now he was approaching delirium.
A good delirium, he thought as he walked from his office to the station. The night before, he and Miles had talked for hours about their experiences as asexuals, and their past relationships. Phoenix had been compelled to talk about Dahlia, and been surprised both to realize how deeply their relationship had affected him and how selectively he had repressed it. Miles had handled his deeply personal realizations with care, and a clear mind. He had also admitted to Phoenix that he had never been in a relationship. Manfred had not approved of personal relationships besides friendships, although he'd never actively discouraged them either. Whenever Miles did have crushes, he'd said, they'd always been on male friends that he'd known for quite some time.
Kind of like me, Phoenix had said. And Miles had kissed him.
Exactly like you, Miles said, grey eyes warm and joyful.
Phoenix walked down the sidewalk, and felt his face flush as he remembered. Oh my God did we kiss. I was so happy, I even shed a few more tears and then he teased me about crying so much because I had cut the onions. Mia, you were right, as usual. Some things never change.
While going down the stairs into the station, he checked the time. As planned, he was right on time. He took a place in full view of the ticket turnstile and waited, searching the crowds.
Maya saw him first. "Nick!" She and Pearl waved as they came through the gates.
He spotted them, and a huge grin lifted his face. As soon as she was through, Pearl ran toward Phoenix as fast as she could. He knelt down to take the full force of her hug, and wheezed when she hit him at the chest. Her little arms went over his shoulders and clasped behind his neck. "We're back!"
Phoenix picked her up in a hug and spun around like Pearl loved. She giggled over his shoulder.
"Pick me up next!" Maya said as she came over. She took off her backpack and Pearl's.
"Are you sure?" asked Phoenix, setting Pearl down. She continued holding his hand.
Maya giggled. "Of course not! Come here." She wrapped her arms around his waist, and Phoenix hugged her shoulders with his free arm. Pearl hugged him briefly from the other side.
"Nick, it's good to see you," said Maya.
"I missed you."
"We missed you!"
"I missed you guys too, I missed you a lot. Especially these great Fey hugs!"
Pearl laughed, and they all squeezed each other tight for a moment. Then Phoenix let Maya go and picked up her bag for her. He shrugged it over one shoulder and put Pearl's bag over the other. It was crowded around them on the sidewalk as they walked home, so Maya and Phoenix each held one of Pearl's hands. They talked about what to have for dinner and what they should do in the coming weekend.
When they made it home, Pearl went straight upstairs to stretch out on the bed. Maya followed after to put their luggage down. Phoenix looked through his recipe book downstairs for chicken katsu. From the loft, he heard Pearl sigh, and Maya say something that made them both laugh. His heart swelled with affection.
Maya came back downstairs and went over to give Phoenix a long hug.
"I can't tell you how good it is to have you both here," he said.
"I was about to say the same thing!" Maya beamed up at him. "It's like everything is right where I left it."
"I'm glad. So how is it going for you in Kurain? Is Pearl doing okay?"
Maya stood at his shoulder while he prepared the cutlets, talking about training and the skills she was learning, village life with Pearl, and her ideas on fully assuming the mantle of Master of Kurain.
"It might seem naïve, but I think things will be different from now on. The clan has been shaken up like never before-and it's not a bad thing." Phoenix glanced over at her. She was smiling, sober. "I think...I know I can do it."
"Maya, you are so brave."
"I guess. I get pretty scared sometimes, still. But then I always think of Pearl, and you, and Mia, and I remember that we're all on the same side." They heard Pearl coming down the stairs. "But we can talk about that later."
"Yes, we will." Phoenix said, and smiled. Maya nodded, and told him she would start the rice, which Pearl overheard.
"Maya, don't burn it," she said as she climbed onto her usual chair at the table.
"That was one time! Well...two. Three, actually."
Phoenix looked at her with exaggerated incredulity. "What?"
"Hey! I needed more practice. Plus, Pearl, you said the crunchy toasted rice was tasty and you ate it all."
"You're right...I did."
"The defense rests." Maya rinsed the rice. "Plus, it's impossible to mess it up in a rice cooker." Pearl cheered.
Pearl was in an energetic, happy mood, and chatted them all the way through dinner. Phoenix gave her a heaping serving of steamed cauliflower. He couldn't stop grinning, watching her talk about her favorite anime that was being made into a movie. She's grown so much since I first met her. It seems like she's picked up some habits from Maya, too.
After dinner, Maya could hardly wait to pull out one of her favorite games that she'd left behind at the apartment. Phoenix did dishes while she set it up, and Pearl made them all chocolate milk.
Maya was explaining how much Pearl's drawing skills had improved since the last time they'd played when Phoenix's cell began to ring.
"I'll get it!" said Pearl while Phoenix dried his hands. She same back, studying the phone. "Mills? Who's that?" She offered the phone to him.
"Um…" he took it, and read the caller. "It's Miles."
"Oooh!" Maya gasped from the table.
Phoenix made a silly face at her, then answered. "Hey, Mills. I mean, Miles ."
"Hello, Wright. I have something rather urgent to-"
"Hi, Mr. Edgeworth!" Maya called from the table.
"Hi!" Pearl chimed in.
Miles chuckled. "Are you visiting with the Feys?" Phoenix could hear him smiling.
"Yes, I am. They're staying the weekend," he said with a grin. "What's going on?"
"I just got a call regarding a trip I applied for. It's to Borginia and the surrounding countries. I have been granted permission to go and study."
"Miles, that's great! How long will it be? When will you leave?"
"It's for a month. And I have to leave tonight."
"Oh!"
Maya and Pearl both looked up at Phoenix.
"That's why I called. I wanted to see you before I left, but my flight will be leaving in two hours. Can you meet me at the airport?"
"Um…"
"I know this is sudden. But I wanted to see you, if possible."
"Yes, of course! I want to see you too." He checked the time. "I think we'll be able to make it."
"'We'? Will you bring the Feys with you?"
"Of course!" Phoenix shut the dishwasher and rolled his sleeves back down. "They would love to see you."
From the table, Maya and Pearl nodded. While Miles told him the details about his flight, Phoenix pointed to the shoes by the door and then to the phone. Pearl put the chocolate milk in the refrigerator.
While Miles told him a little about the trip and the application process, Phoenix cradled the small phone with his shoulder and put on his own shoes. After explaining the basics, Miles said, "I've got to go so I can concentrate on packing."
"Okay. I love you, and I'll see you soon."
"All right. Goodbye."
"Bye."
The three met up in the living room by the door. "What did he say?" asked Maya.
"He's going on a trip and his plane is leaving soon," Phoenix explained. "If we hurry, we can make it on time to see him off."
They hustled down the stairs and to the train station. Pearl was curious about what Miles did when he studied overseas, and Phoenix did his best to explain on the ride over. When they reached the airport's busy train station, Pearl automatically took Maya's hand. Phoenix stood on her other side, and they started walking.
"We're making good time," he said. "Pearl, is this your first time at the airport?"
Pearl nodded. "I know about planes, though."
"Which gate are we going to?" asked Maya.
"He'll be at C52." Phoenix studied the signs. "Let's go this way."
As they walked and went through security, Phoenix continuously scanned the crowds for Miles. Pearl took in their surroundings, but Maya noticed how fervently Phoenix was looking around. She couldn't hold back a smirk.
"Nick," she said confidentially as Pearl put her shoes back on. "Have you two... Are you two official yet?"
"Huh?" He tore his search away from the people waiting to go through security. "We, um...no, we aren't." He grinned widely, thinking about last night.
Maya lightly punched him in the shoulder. "Then what are you smiling for?" They got up and started walking. "Just be boyfriends and get married already," she hissed, and he laughed.
When they entered the gate waiting area Phoenix spotted Edgeworth immediately, sitting in the corner with his bags and reading a heavy-looking book, pencil in hand, and frowning at the page before him.
"There he is," Phoenix said. "Let's-"
Maya was already running over with Pearl. "Mr. Edgeworth!" she called. Some other people in the area looked up.
Edgeworth looked up to see all three of them, and turned pink. He stood, fumbling to set aside his book and bags. When he made eye contact with Phoenix, his blush deepened.
"Hi," said Pearl. She was the first to get there, but stopped outside his personal space and waved. "We're here."
"Indeed you are," said Edgeworth, and patted her almost timidly on her shoulder. "It has been a while since I last saw you."
"Edgeworth!" Maya held out her arms for a brief hug.
"Hello, Ms. Fey." He patted her upper arm briefly as well after their hug. "How are you?"
"I'm really good!" she said, eyes shining. "I can't believe you're going to Europe!"
"Yes. I have been there several times, and I always enjoy my visits."
Phoenix stepped forward for his hug too. The embrace came easily, although he could practically feel the heat radiating from Edgeworth's face. Their hug was just as short as Maya's however. That's right, Phoenix thought. We're in public.
"I'm so happy to see all of you here and looking well," Edgeworth said. "What a pleasant surprise."
Phoenix wanted to say something, but only managed to beam happily.
"I saw the photo you sent on the refrigerator," Maya said chattily. Next to her, Pearl nodded vigorously. "Pearl loves that garden."
"Perhaps you shall visit it someday," he said to Pearl, who nodded again. "I gather you two are rather busy with your training these days."
"Yep," said Maya, "just like you! What will you be studying in Europe?"
"Oh, the usual." Edgeworth gestured at his book. "Adversarial litigation and discovery practices, voir dire , and criminal procedures."
"Um...sounds great."
Phoenix finally found his words. "But you only have a month?" Edgeworth nodded. "That's a tall order for a month!"
Edgeworth tapped his temple. "I have a plan." He explained, in chronological order, the destinations and sights to see that he would fit into his busy schedule. Maya made him promise to send pictures.
Right on time, the boarding announcement sounded at the gate. Maya and Pearl went to look out the window at the plane and the airfield.
Edgeworth turned and began gathering his things. Phoenix handed him his book, which was indeed heavy. "You don't have to rush," he said. "You probably won't board for at least a few minutes."
He took the book. "Thank you. Actually, I will be boarding soon. I'm flying first class. " He slipped the book into his carry-on.
"Oh, yeah."
Edgeworth smiled, a quiet expression meant just for him. "Right now I rather wish I wasn't, however."
"O-oh. Me too." Phoenix had a dorky grin. "Yeah."
Edgeworth chuckled, and shook his head. He closed up his bags and put on his jacket, and then surprised Phoenix by hugging him again. He wasted no time hugging him back.
"I'll miss you," he murmured.
Suddenly choked up with tears, Phoenix squeezed him tightly. "Me too," he whispered. They separated, and looked in each others' eyes. Miles' eyes were soft and concerned. I love you so much, Phoenix thought.
"Wright, for goodness' sake, don't cry!"
"I wasn't!" he protested, and released his tension in a laugh. Then he betrayed himself by sniffling a little.
"I knew it," said Miles fondly, and gathered his things. Phoenix laughed again, and they made small talk while they went to stand in line. Maya and Pearl spotted them, and went over too.
"Are you excited?" Maya asked.
Edgeworth nodded. "Very much so."
The line moved along, and they said their goodbyes. Before Edgeworth entered the jet bridge, he smiled, and waved to them. They all waved back.
"Bye!" Pearl called, and then Edgeworth was gone.
"Can we stay until the plane leaves?" Phoenix asked. "I know we've got that chocolate milk waiting in the fridge."
Maya nodded, and looked to Pearl, who nodded too. "Sure!"
They went over to the window. Pearl stood on the chairs to watch the ground crew and see the plane taxi away from the gate. Phoenix was worried they would lose sight, but it prepared for takeoff on the nearest runway.
"Oh!" Pearl exclaimed as the plane increased speed.
Maya tapped their shoulders. "Come on, we can see the rest of the runway from over here." She led them to the window a few gates down the terminal, in the corner.
Almost as if by magic, the distant plane lifted off the ground and began to climb.
"Bye, Edgeworth," said Phoenix, and waved. Pearl copied him. Maya blew a kiss, which made Phoenix laugh.
They stayed until the plane disappeared, waving and blowing kisses into the sky.
