A/N: All my usual disclaimers, ect., I'm not J.K. and own no rights to HP, but am 'borrowing' several of her characters and weaving them into my A/U, along with characters of my very own. I may not follow canon exactly, as my universe began to veer from J.K.'s somewhere in HBP and picks up where DH should be running. I wanted to give SS, RL, FW, AD, and others different, happier endings (don't they deserve it?). Your reviews are, as always, greatly appreciated; PLEASE forgive my typo's and other mistakes! It's been a LOOONNGG time since I sat at a typewriter (doesn't it tell just how long, since I didn't call it a 'keyboard'?), so where are we now? Ah, yes, Snape is back. Let's get to it, then.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Chapter Eight: If I Could Turn Back Time; or Through the LookingGlass
The days slipped by, one after another, and everyone fell into a comfortable routine. The guys spent their mornings in what felt suspiciously like classes with Severus and Remus, reading book after book on various curses, hexes, wardings, and potions; the girls spent their mornings sleeping in, having not gotten to bed until dawn because of their nightly lessons with Mab.
Harry was fast becoming something of a bookworm, unconsciously drawing on some of Hermiones' abilities. Even Snape was inspired to offer him an occasional compliment on the academic improvement he was showing. He also found that his dueling was improving, as it became easier to remember better, faster, more powerful spells.
Neville was at first in a quake every time Snape even looked his way, much less called on him to answer a question. But gradually, he actually started to shine—especially in potions. He only fainted once, and that happened when Snape told him 'Good job, Longbottom' when he was the first one to complete a rather difficult potions assignment.
Ron was disgusted at having to resume 'classes', especially since he no longer had Hermione or Luna to 'crib' from, and no one else would let him.
Fred and George had been closet bookworms for years. How else had they been able to invent their 'Weasleys' Wheezers'? They'd both come in at the top of their Potions OWLs every year, and every one knew that Snape cut no slack in his classroom. They'd not let any of this be known, because they'd not wanted to be like Percy. He might be their brother, but Percy was a prat.
Draco had inherited a fine mind and keen intelligence from both his parents. Learning and studies had always come easy to him, with very little effort on his part. If not for Voldemorts' return, he would have joined both his father and his godfather as a rarity—a Slytherin Head Boy.
Now that Snape no longer had to cosset and pamper the children of his fellow Deatheaters, he was able to REALLY teach, something he truly loved to do. If he could just keep his thoughts from drifting towards his prized pupil, that Gryffindor extraordinaire, Hermione Granger! Why on earth could he not get her off his mind? He'd NEVER had any inclinations towards pedophilia before! 'What's wrong with me?' he thought. 'Am I becoming a dirty old man?'
Everyone always met in the Great Hall for an enormous afternoon tea, and both males and females were eager to share what they'd learnt. Remus had always had a relaxed, accepting manner, and so he treated the young adults as just that—adults.
Severus, while more relaxed than ANYONE—even Remus or Draco—could remember, still had a problem letting down his reserve. But he smiled a truly genuine smile once or twice, and condescended to engage in their conversations whenever his opinion was sought.
On these rare occasions, Hermione stored up mental images of a more 'human' Snape. She still had trepidations about this 'sex magick' stuff, but he was DEFINITELY becoming a more palatable option. After all, it would only be the one time. Surely she could 'take one for the team', couldn't she?
Remus watched both Hermiones' reaction to Severus, and Severus' reactions to Hermione, with a sly half-smile. Poppy had filled him in on the whole 'pairings' thing, and after he'd gotten over his initial shock, he could really visualize them together. Severus would make her tougher, thicken her skin, so to speak. She'd make him more open, maybe even help him find the absolution that he craved—but wouldn't admit to.
Since the murder of her parents, and every one of her other relations by Deatheaters six months ago, it seemed Hermione had been lost, any way. Even with Harry as an adopted brother, she was missing her father most dreadfully. Maybe an older wizard WAS what she needed. Remus would just wait and see, but the gods help Severus Snape if he tried to use her like a slag. He'd KILL him, the Ministry and Azkaban be damned!
During their joint evenings, in the hours before supper was served up in the Great Hall, everyone went on 'spider hunts' or just plain practiced their dueling in pairs. Of course, if some of the pairs chose to duel for snogs, everyone else pretended not to notice. The only rule that was STRICTLY enforced was the 'No Sex Rule', and that was Mabs' Rule so no-one dared break it.
Fred and Erika, were now openly a pair, kissing and arguing openly; as well as George and Mandy, who while the calmer, quieter pair, were still as openly affectionate. For the first time in the twins' lives, they were letting another person get just as close to them as they were to each other.
Ron had finally screwed his courage to the sticking point, and snogged the shi—ite out of Luna Lovegood. And she had reciprocated, pinning his back against a huge oak tree and trying her best to find out what he'd had for breakfast so deeply did she return his kiss.
Neville had been slow to act on his growing fascination with Gillian. As a matter of fact, Gillian had been the one to initiate a shy, gentle kiss when they were 'spider hunting' away from the others. But Neville Longbottom had been the one to pull her closer against him, and kiss her back most thoroughly, much to both their satisfactions.
Draco was in hot pursuit of one auburn-haired Ravenclaw, Miranda, but she continued to laughingly dance just beyond his grasp. Although he was quickly developing a serious case of 'blue balls', he had yet to even kiss her. He now sometimes walked with a slight limp after their duels, and it had nothing to do with being hit by a curse. Miranda, on the other hand, skipped as happily as Luna Lovegood ever had, blowing kisses in the air aimed Dracos' way.
Harry was in over his head, and he knew it. He needed a fathers' advice, and most oddly it wasn't Remus that he elected to ask. He found himself, almost against his will, inviting Severus Snape to take a private walk with him up to his 'thinking place'.
'Oh bloody hell, Severus,' he thought, 'well-done. The-Boy-Who-Lived is now going to read these unnatural thoughts about Hermione, and you are going to be SO dead!' But they walked side-by-side in a tense silence up to the rocky crag, and sat down to stare at the rippling lake surface together.
Severus waited patiently for Harry to say or do whatever he felt he needed to, but was totally unprepared for the embarrassed look Harry gave him before he began to speak, "Sev. . .ah. . . , Professor Snape, I have a VERY limited amount of experience with the opposite sex," he blushed a fiery crimson red at Snapes' open-mouthed goggle.
"Merlins' Balls, Potter! You're not asking ME to explain the 'birds and bees' are you?" Severus asked in astonishment, closely akin to horror.
"No sir, not THAT! Uncle Vernon had that talk with both my cousin Dudley and me when we were ten years old. At least the part about how not to get the girl 'in the family way'," Harry said in a rush. "It's the parts he failed to explain that I need help with."
Now it was Severus' turn to redden as he cleared his throat, and croaked out, "And just what parts are THOSE, Mr. Potter?" He HAD been a Head-of-House, after all, and he had provided counseling over the years to both boys and girls on just this subject. 'Forget who's asking, Severus,' he thought. 'Just answer the boys' questions, and get on with it.'
Harry sat in an embarrassed silence, as he tried to verbalize his thoughts. Then he turned an open, vulnerable, emerald gaze to meet a shining black stare. Severus was taken aback. 'Sweet Circe, Albus was right! The boy is just as much, if not more, Lily Evans as he was James Potter. James would've NEVER looked at me like this! Lily, yes, James, no,' thought Severus, much to his surprise.
"Sir, how would a Gryffindor go about courting a Slytherin?" Harry softly asked. "I mean, I've had two crushes before, but this is . . ., different, some
how. I can't explain just HOW it's different. It's just DIFFERENT!" Harry stumbled to a halt.
Of anything Harry could've asked, this open, honest question took Severus' breath away, so close was it to his very own conundrum. He pondered this for a while before he answered carefully, "Well, assuming the person in question is interested in you also, you could try an honest approach. But MOST Slytherins prefer to be the Seeker, not the Snitch. If I were you, I'd play the Snitch for a while, and wait for her to try to catch me. If that fails to do the trick, then reverse the order and see if she responds better to that approach." 'There, that sounds pretty good,' Severus thought with a pat of self-congratulations to himself.
The penny dropped for Harry, and he began to laugh. "So THAT is what Miranda's doing to Draco!" Harry exclaimed.
"Who do you think advised her, Harry?" Severus queried with his familiar arched eyebrow and snarky tone, before he, too, began to laugh, much to Harrys' shock and delight.
They had seemed to have reached an accord, and the two wizards walked back down the hill much more at peace with, and accepting of, one another.
Meanwhile, Hermione and Elle had been dueling each other, and had finally come to a 'draw'. As they flopped down onto the grass to catch their respective breaths, both girls started to laugh. Elle grew serious, and put a question to Hermione, "Hermione, how can I get Harry to notice me? I've done everything I can think of, and short of acting the 'grindylow', I have no idea how to interest him!"
"Well, first off, the 'grindylow' approach won't work with Harry. Just ask Pansy Parkinson or Lavender Brown, because they both tried," Hermione answered in a serious tone. "Harry's just very shy around girls. He gets tongue-tied, and clumsy, and just turns into an idiot. You'd have to know just how unloved and unwanted he's always been in the only home he's ever known, by the only relations he's ever known. They made him feel like a worthless burden his whole life." Hermione gave a shuddering sigh, and she continued, "He has an ache so deep in his heart, that I think he's afraid to let
himself be open to being loved by a girl. I believe he honestly doesn't feel worthy of anyones' love."
Elles' beautiful amethyst eyes shimmered with genuine tears, and she said, "I could love him, I know I could. All my life, all I've ever wanted to be is a wife and mother. I don't want to be a modern witch, with a career and all! I just want to love my husband, and be loved in return."
"For Merlins' sake, don't tell Harry THAT! At least not right away! That's why he broke up with Ginny! He's terrified that You-Know-Who will read his mind, and use anyone he loves as a weapon against him, and I have the feeling that he's right about that," Hermione admonished her.
Hermione continued in a calmer tone, "Why don't you try an honest approach with him? Who's to say that the girl can't chase the boy? Just do it in a ladylike fashion, and remember Harry will NEVER make a 'move' in public."
Elle gave her a watery smile, and sniffed back the tears hovering in her eyes. "I'll do it! I'll try to win Harry Potters' heart for my very own!"
After they'd eaten their supper, the girls all left following Poppy for their nightly lessons with Mab. Remus and Severus sent the guys off to bed, and retired to Severus' dungeon chambers for a generous brandy and a refilling of Remus' Wolfsbane Potion, as the full moon was only one week away.
They'd decided to fetch the potion first, and Severus was furious! His precious private potions storeroom had been ransacked, his whole six month supply of the necessary Wolfsbane Potion was gone, even the needed ingredients were gone with which to brew more. Although it was a moot point, as the potion had to be started on the first night of the waning moon, and wouldn't be finished until the dark of the moon.
They searched high and low, but no potion and no ingredients turned up anywhere, not even in the hospital wing! It was ALL gone! Remus was in a panic, and Severus was in a fine rage that ANY one would DARE to steal from his stores! The only thing that was left to do by either irate wizard was to indulge in an extra-large snifter of brandy, and wait for the ladies to return.
It was nearly dawn, with that strange phenomena of pre-dawn lightening that happened before the re-darkening before the dawn, gloaming overhead before the ladies returned, sweating, with their bare feet grass stained as usual. Poppy tried her best to calm Severus, to no avail. He stomped off to his dungeon, black robe swirling around him fiercely.
Remus, on the other hand defeatedly trudged behind Poppy, Luna, and Hermione up to the hospital wing to check on Minerva, who was still in her cat form. Minerva appeared to be asleep, so they were discussing Remus' problem in hushed tones.
Remus said, "Severus says that even if we had every ingredient the potion requires, the timing is off by three weeks. It has to be started on the first night of the waning moon, and completed on the night of the dark of the moon. He might be the best Potions Master in England, but even HE can't turn back time. I'll have to get as far away from here as possible. The full moon is in one week, so I'll be leaving at first light."
Minerva stretched a slow, lazy cat stretch, licked her paw and proceeded to wash her face, before she let out a confusing series of meows, growls, and chuffs. Luna listened intently, and then translated, "Professor McGonagall says that Severus might not be able to turn back time, but for Hermione to help him this one time. Then she says, 'Upside down, three turns to the left; and right side up, seven turns to the right. You know the laws.' I'm quoting her exactly. Whatever does she mean, Hermione?"
Hermione smiled widely, and wrapped Remus in a bear hug, saying, "Don't you DARE leave! Professor McGonagall has just made the impossible, possible. You'll have your potion well before the full moon, and we'll need you at the battle to come. You go get some sleep, and we will prove it to you tomorrow." Then she quickly left, and rushed down the stairs to beard the Snark in his den.
She knocked firmly on Snapes' chamber door, which was swung open by a strange house elf. Strange because of the fine robes it wore with pride, and strange because she'd never encountered this particular house elf in all her years at Hogwarts. She made the proper bow, and introduced herself, "I'm Hermione Granger, to see Professor Snape, please."
The house elf returned her bow, then said, "My master's insupposed. Youse must come later, later," and promptly attempted to shut the door in Hermiones' face, only to be confounded by Hermiones' now bruised foot wedged into the crack of the door.
"Professor! Professor Snape, please let me come in! It's Hermione Granger, and I have a solution to Remus' problem," Hermione shouted over top of a very offended house elf's head through the crack of the door where her foot was becoming increasingly crushed.
"Gristle! Let Miss Granger in!" Severus snarled, in a very unwelcoming tone indeed. The house elf sniffed her indignation, but promptly obeyed, and opened the door.
"Thank you, Gristle," Hermione said through clenched teeth, as she hobbled into the sitting room. She looked around in appreciation of Snapes' taste in décor, not too stark, definitely not too fluffy. It seemed to her eyes to be just right. Under her breath she muttered, "Be careful Goldilocks, the bear might just be hungry!"
Severus was lounging back, looking entirely too human, with his white linen shirt sleeves and collar unbuttoned, exposing an expanse of ivory throat clear past his collarbone down his chest, where a smattering of fine black hairs were exposed. He held a brandy in his hand, which he set down on the low table in front of the black leather sofa as he swung his sock-feet down and stood up with her entrance. The scowl scrawled across his ill-tempered face was the only thing that spoiled this unexpected view of intimacy that Hermione found totally intriguing.
"And just what miracle cure do YOU have in mind for Lupin, Miss Granger? True love?" Severus snarled at Hermione, his unease at being caught in such a state of undress, and embarrassment of having the object of his increasingly intense desire being the one to catch him so, making him go on the attack before he could be hurt.
Hermione just ignored his hateful remark, and said, "No sir, not true love. That only happens in fairytales. However, you did say that if you could turn back time, you could re-brew the potion and have it before the full moon."
"And there's the rub, Miss Granger. It is IMPOSSIBLE to turn back time, therefore there will be no potion in time for the coming full moon," Severus replied snarkily, in the harsh tone he usually leveled at the more dense third years who didn't pay attention.
Hermione reached down, picked up the nearly empty brandy snifter, and tossed it back in a single fiery gulp. When she had finally quit coughing and spluttering, with the help of several firm claps on her back by Snape, she looked up into truly amused jet black eyes, and found one of those rare, genuine smiles curling one side of his lip up. He helped her to a seat on his sofa, took the opposite end for himself, and faced her in a much more convivial mood, ready to hear whatever solution her brilliant mind had devised.
When she had caught her breath, Hermione carefully asked him, "What if you COULD turn back time, sir? Could you spend three weeks in total hiding, with me tagging along as your helper?"
"You're talking about the Dark Arts, Miss Granger! Terrible things happen to wizards who meddle with time!" Severus responded in a shocked tone. "You've been spending too much time in the secret library in the Slytherin common-room, haven't you?"
"You mean there are SPELLS that can do it?" Hermione's mind had run off on a tangent. Then she said, "No sir," as she pulled a long golden chain out of the neckline of her simple, white robe, and showed it to him. "This is a Time-Turner. Professor McGonagall gave it to me my third year. It made it possible for me to take double classes every year."
Severus reached out with his long, ivory fingers to pull it towards him for a closer look, and before she'd thought it through, she slapped his hand away. Severus went open-mouthed in shock at her temerity, as he rubbed his stinging knuckles with his other hand.
Hermione went open-mouthed in horror that she'd actually STRUCK her teacher! And that it was none other than Professor Severus Snape! 'Sweet Merlin,' she thought, 'now you've done it, you stupid, stupid girl! He'll NEVER have you now!'
Seeking to salvage the situation, her face an amazing shade of crimson, she made her apologies, "Professor, I'm SO sorry! Please, sir, forgive me, I don't know what came over me! I STRUCK you! Just like you weren't my teacher! Just like you were one of the boys, and not my superior!" She was rattling on, not daring to even meet his eyes, or she would have seen the emotions running from outrage, to spite, to shock that for that one unguarded instant she'd considered him her contemporary.
Severus cleared his throat before he slowly growled in his amazing deep voice, "I accept your apology, Hermione," his tone making her very name a silky caress.
Hermione shot a startled glance at his unexpected use of her given name. It had sent a shiver down her spine to hear the way it rolled off his tongue. She'd always HATED her name, but sweet Circe! The way HE had said it, she could really grow to love it.
He continued with, "As we'll be in hiding, as well as in the past together for three weeks, I think it would be best if you were to call me Severus as well."
She licked her suddenly dry lips, not realizing what an invitation it unconsciously presented, and tried out his name, "Severus." She looked at him, and said it again, "Severus."
One ink dark eyebrow arched up, and he half-bowed to her, a smirk on his face. "That IS my name, Hermione," Severus purred her name again. Then they smiled at each other, and began to discuss what they might need to carry with them, and where exactly they could hide that a patrolling Poppy or Hagrid wouldn't come across them.
One very Slytherin-like idea of Hermiones' actually found merit to Severus' way of thinking. He summoned his personal house elf, "Gristle! Find the house elf, Dobby, and have him fetch Harry Potter down here."
Barely fifteen minutes had passed before a worried, disheveled Harry, still clad in his pajamas, presented himself at Snapes' chamber door with a loud knock. He was accompanied by Dobby, who wouldn't allow his Master Harry to go alone. They were admitted by Snapes' house elf, Gristle. Harry had never seen any house elf dressed so fine as Gristle, and he complimented her on her well-made robes, a complete, petite version of a teaching robe.
Gristle preened a bit, quite pleased to show off just how well HER Master provided for her, and she said, "Thank youse, Harry Potter. T'was Masters' last Chris'mast present to Gristle. Master always presents Gristle new clothes every Chris'mast, has since he was seventeen. Master ist good to Gristle."
Harry resolved then and there that if he lived through the coming battle, he'd do the same by Dobby. It also greatly impressed Harry. If Severus Snape could be a kind and generous master to a lowly house elf, something no-one else would know or care about, somewhere buried deep inside of him must be a good man.
Severus 'explained' about all the missing potions and ingredients, although to both Harry and Hermione it sounded more like 'complaining'. Hermione held up her Time Turner, and Harry instantly knew what her plan was. It was like they were Fred and George, so completely did their minds coincide!
"Dobby, go up to my room and fetch me the Marauders' Map, and my special cloak, please," said Harry. With a snap of his fingers, Dobby disappeared, only to 'pop' back in a matter of moments, the desired articles in his hand.
Harry handed the cloak to Severus, saying, "I know you'll keep this safe until you return it to me, again." He met the surprised look in Severus' eyes with a look of acknowledgement to let Snape know, without any words, that he was aware of just what Snape had done for him as a baby.
Then he spread out the Marauders' Map, which Snape recognized instantly from that night so long ago when he'd run into Harry while on patrol. Harry gave him a wink, drew out his wand, tapped the parchment, and repeated the charm, "I solemnly swear that I am up to no good!" Both Severus and Hermione stared in fascination, as the map of Hogwarts and the locations of everyone in it slowly appeared. Harry then said with another touch of his wand, "Mischief Managed!" and all the ink drained away back into the parchment.
"The map never lies. It will show you where every one is all the time, and what they're doing. There are three secret passageways into Hogsmeade village. The One-eyed Witches' Tunnel comes out in the cellar of Honeydukes, that's directly across from Sluggs and Dribbles, for easier access to get your potion ingredients," Harry said. "Never forget to close the map with 'mischief managed' when you are done, or any one can read it."
Harry rose to his feet and gave Hermione a fierce hug. "Good luck, 'Mione. Take care," he said, and then he left going back up to his room to attempt to go back to sleep, taking Dobby with him.
Hermione asked Severus, "Are you ready to go?" Severus rose to tower over her, and slipped the map into his pocket. Gristle popped back, and said loudly, "If Master goes, Gristle goes too! Gristle must take care of Master, and Lady!"
Severus gave Hermione a wry grin, at the over-protective house elfs' behavior. Then he held out an ivory long-fingered hand, which she took, and led her towards his bedroom. He paused briefly to pass her Harrys' cloak, and to pick up his wand, eyeing his bed surreptitiously now that the object of so many vivid dreams was actually in close proximity to it. He sighed regretfully, giving himself a small shake.
He led her past his bed, where he took a mental note of the fact that she, too, had glanced at it speculatively. He opened the door to his private bath and turned left to face a huge mirror set into an ebony frame carved with ancient runes. Then he pulled out an ornate penknife, which he sharpened his quills, and cut a tiny place on one of his beautiful fingers. He made sure the blood was flowing freely, then ran the wounded finger over the runes.
Hermione had seen no visible change to the mirror itself, but Severus promptly stepped through it. Holding out the not bleeding hand, he looked at her and said with a grin, "Coming, Alice?"
Without hesitation, she grabbed hold of his hand and let herself be pulled through the looking glass.
