disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight series. It all belongs to Stephenie Meyer (what an amazing author/woman for creating such a perfect world). I use dialogue from her outtakes and from the actual novels. It is her ideas, with a twist of my own thoughts behind the complex character of Edward Cullen..sigh..
8. FLIGHT
DEMETRI LEFT US IN THE CHEERFULLY OPULENT RECEPTION area, where the woman Gianna was still at her post behind the polished counter. Bright, harmless music tinkled from hidden speakers.
"Do not leave until dark," he warned us.
I nodded, and Demetri hurried away. At least we would be leaving alive.
I felt Gianna eye my cloak. Wait—he's now part of us? But. Wait. Hold on. I thought. He was with her. Huh? Her thoughts were incoherent afterwards.
"Are you all right?" I asked Bella quietly, so Gianna would not hear. I could hear the stress in my voice. I was still nervous about having Bella around all of those thirsty vampires. I still blamed myself for putting her in that situation.
"You'd better make her sit before she falls," Alice said. "She's going to pieces."
Alice was right. Bella was shaking hard. Even her teeth were chattering.
"Shh, Bella, shh," I pulled her to the sofa farthest away from Gianna at the desk.
"I think she's having hysterics. Maybe you should slap her," Alice suggested.
I glanced at Alice, telling her to shut up.
"It's all right, you're safe, it's all right," I chanted again and again. I pulled her onto my lap, tucking the thick wool cloak around her to keep her from my cold skin. She was cold enough from being underground in wet clothes before.
"All those people," she sobbed.
"I know," I whispered.
"It's so horrible."
"Yes, it is. I wish you hadn't had to see that."
Bella rested her head against my chest and used the cloak to dry her eyes, taking a few deep breaths.
"Is there anything I can get you?" Gianna asked.
"No," I answered coldly.
She nodded, smiled, and then disappeared.
"Does she know what's going on here?" Bella asked once Gianna disappeared.
"Yes. She knows everything," I responded.
"Does she know they're going to kill her someday?"
"She's knows it's a possibility. She's hoping they'll decide to keep her."
"She wants to be one of them?"
I nodded once, keeping my eyes on her face to watch her reaction.
Bella shuddered to her thoughts. "How can she want that?" she whispered. "How can she watch those people file through to that hideous room and want to be a part of that?"
I didn't answer. I hoped Bella would change her mind about changing herself. But it still hurt to hear her say it. Of course, I knew she meant about being a part of the Volturi, but they were the very essence of what all vampires really were.
"Oh, Edward," Bella cried, and was sobbing again.
"What's wrong?" I asked, afraid that I hurt her in the past five minutes, as I rubbed her back with gentle pats.
Bella wrapped her arms around my neck and hugged herself closer to me. "Is it really sick for me to be happy right now?" Her voice broke twice during the question.
Her move made me happy for the first time in six months. Even after what I did to her, Bella still wanted to hold me. I pulled her even tighter against my chest. "I know exactly what you mean," I whispered. "But we have lots of reasons to be happy. For one, we're alive."
"Yes. That's a good one."
"And together," I breathed. This word meant so much. I never dreamed that I would be able to say it again.
Bella simply nodded. That could only mean that she did not think we would be together for much longer. My goals for her to get over me worked. Damn. I wanted it to happen, but still it stung.
"And, with any luck, we'll still be alive tomorrow," I whispered again.
"Hopefully," she said uneasily.
"The outlook is quite good," Alice assured us. "I'll see Jasper in less than twenty-four hours," she added in a satisfied tone.
Bella and I stared into each other's faces. I knew I was imagining different things than she was. I hoped that I would be able to hold her forever like I was now. My fingertips traced her face, lingering under her eyes. I noticed the circles underneath them.
"You look so tired."
"And you look thirsty," Bella whispered back, studying the purple bruises under my own eyes.
I shrugged. "It's nothing." I no longer felt the urge to kill her. Thinking my angel was dead for twenty-four hours had completely silenced the monster within me. Sure, I felt the thirst, but it was infinitesimal.
"Are you sure? I could sit with Alice," she offered. I thought I heard a trace of unwillingness in her tone. I hoped that she did not want to move, because holding her in my arms was what made this moment bearable.
"Don't be ridiculous," I sighed. "I've never been in better control of that side of my nature than right now."
Bella sat there quietly, pondering over something, staring at my face. She seemed so wary and cautious of me, whenever I touched her. What could she be thinking now? Had I been too late? Did she really get over me?
I stared at her face, trying to read into her eyes. I was also rememorizing every inch of her face, so I would not forget it when she left; meanwhile Alice and I discussed how to gethome.
"What was all that talk about singers?" Alice asked at one point.
"La tua cantante," Edward said.
"Yes, that," Alice said.
I shrugged. It wasn't that important as it sounded. "They have a name for someone who smells the way Bella does to me. They call her my singer—because her blood sings for me."
Alice laughed.
I could tell Bella was exhausted, but for some reason, she refused to close her eyes and rest.
Now and then, as I talked with Alice, I would lean down suddenly and kiss her—brushing against her hair, her forehead, her nose. The sound of her heartbeat filled my ears and completed the aura of euphoria I was in.
It was heaven—right smack in the middle of hell.
I heard Alec's footsteps the same time Alice did. My arms tightened around Bella, and both Alice and I looked to the back of the room with wary eyes. Bella leaned back into my chest, tighter than before, as Alec walked through the double doors.
It was good news.
"You're free to leave now," Alec told us. "We ask that you don't linger in the city."
"That won't be a problem," I said in an ice cold voice. I couldn't imagine wanting to stay in this city any longer than we had to be here.
Alec smiled, nodded, and disappeared again.
"Follow the right hallway around the corner to the first set of elevators," Gianna told us as I helped Bella to her feet. I would have carried her, but I knew how she hated that. "The lobby is two floors down, and exits to the street. Goodbye, now," she added, tried to create a pleasant mood.
Alice shot her a dark look, as we walked out. I wondered what that was about, but Alice was thinking about something else.
The party was still in full swing in the streets. The street lamps were just coming on as we walked swiftly through the narrow, cobbled lanes. The sky was a dull, fading gray overhead, but the buildings crowded the streets so closely that it felt darker.
The party was darker, too. The long, trailing cloak I was now wearing did not stand out, since there were others in black satin cloaks now, and many were wearing plastic fangs.
"Ridiculous," I muttered.
"Where's Alice?" Bella whispered, in a panicked tone.
"She went to retrieve your bags from where she stashed them this morning."
"She's stealing a car, too, isn't she?" Bella guessed.
I grinned. Bella was still very observant. "Not till we're outside."
Bella looked as if she was about to collapse on her feet, so I wound my arm around her waist and supported most of her weight as we walked.
I led her toward a dark car, waiting in a pool of shadow to the right of the gate with the engine running. I slid into the backseat with her. On normal pretenses, I would have demanded to drive, but right now, all I wanted to do was hold Bella in my arms and stare into her beautiful face.
Alice was apologetic. "I'm sorry." She gestured vaguely toward the dashboard. "There wasn't much to choose from."
"It's fine, Alice," I grinned. "They can't all be 911 Turbos."
She sighed. "I may have to acquire one of those legally. It was fabulous."
"I'll get you one for Christmas," I promised. I owed Alice big time. I owed her much more than a car. I owed her my life.
Alice turned to beam at me. "Yellow."
I kept Bella tight in my arms. I tried to wrap her inside the cloak, to keep her warm.
"You can sleep now, Bella," I murmured. "It's over."
"I don't want to sleep. I'm not tired." She was just as stubborn as ever. Good. She had not changed.
I pressed my lips to the hollow under her ear. "Try," I encouraged her.
She shook her head and I sighed.
"You're still just as stubborn."
On the flight to Atlanta, Bella asked the flight attendant if she could have a Coke. I knew her low tolerance for caffeine. In normal circumstances, she would bounce off the walls with caffeine. This confirmed her exhaustion.
"Bella," I said disapprovingly.
Alice was behind us. I could hear her murmuring to Jasper on the phone.
"I don't want to sleep," she reminded me. "If I close my eyes now, I'll see things I don't want to see. I'll have
nightmares."
I didn't argue after that. I did not want to cause her pain. I had already done that enough.
Bella kept drinking soda, seeming more awake and alert with each sip. Soon, she barely even blinked. I was so happy to have her safe in my arms. I traced her face repeatedly. With each one of my touches, Bella touched my face too. She was still very cautious, and it frustrated me. I had no idea why she was being so wary, and it was driving me mad. I continued to kiss her hair, her forehead, her wrists. I didn't dare kiss her lips yet. I was not ready for that yet.
I didn't speak. I still hoped she would sleep. I remembered how she spoke in her sleep and wondered what she would dream about after this experience.
Somehow, Bella was still awake when we reached the airport in Atlanta, and even as we flew above Seattle's cloud cover.
Alice went quickly to Jasper's side once we landed; they didn't embrace like other couples meeting there. They only stared into each other's faces; yet, somehow, the moment was so private that one still felt the need to look away. Carlisle and Esme waited in a quiet corner far from the line for the metal detectors, in the shadow of a wide pillar. Esme reached for Bella, hugging her fiercely, yet awkwardly, because I still kept my arms around her, too, unwilling to give her up just yet.
"Thank you so much," she said in Bella's ear.
Then Esme threw her arms around me, and she looked like she would be crying if that were possible.
"You will never put me through that again," she nearly growled.
I grinned, repentantly. "Sorry, Mom."
"Thank you, Bella," Carlisle said. "We owe you."
"Hardly," she mumbled.
"She's dead on her feet," Esme scolded me, as if I had not tried to get her to sleep. "Let's get her home."
I dragged Bella on one side, and Esme was on the other. I stiffened as I caught sight of Rosalie beside Emmett.
"Don't," Esme whispered. "She feels awful."
"She should," I said, not attempting to keep my voice down.
"It's not her fault," Bella said, pleading to avoid a fight.
"Let her make amends," Esme pleaded. "We'll ride with Alice and Jasper."
I glowered at Rosalie, who was waiting for us. I tried reading her thoughts, and she did seem sorry. It did not change the fact at what she had done.
"Please, Edward," Bella said.
I sighed, and towed her toward the car. How could I not give her what she wanted? I owed Bella, as well as Alice, my life.
Emmett and Rosalie got in the front seat without speaking, while I pulled Bella in the back. She laid her head against my chest, finally giving in to exhaustion and letting her eyes close.
"Edward," Rosalie began.
"I know." My tone was not generous, but her thoughts really did show that she was sorry.
"Bella?" Rosalie asked softly.
Bella's eyelids fluttered open suddenly. "Yes, Rosalie?" she asked, a little hesitant.
"I'm so very sorry, Bella. I feel wretched about every part of this, and so grateful that you were brave enough to go save my brother after what I did. Please say you'll forgive me."
The words were awkward, stilted because of her embarrassment, but they seemed sincere.
"Of course, Rosalie," Bella mumbled. "It's not your fault at all. I'm the one who jumped off the damn cliff. Of course I forgive you."
"It doesn't count until she's conscious, Rose," Emmett chuckled.
"I'm conscious," she argued, but to no avail; it just sounded like a garbled sigh.
"Let her sleep," I insisted.
We soon arrived to Bella's house. Since she was still sleeping, I carried her from the car.
"Bella!" Charlie shouted from some distance. He was definitely very angry with me. I deserved it.
"Charlie," Bella mumbled.
"Shh," I whispered. "It's okay; you're home and safe. Just sleep."
"I can't believe you have the nerve to show your face here," Charlie bellowed at me.
"Stop it, Dad," Bella groaned.
"What's wrong with her?" Charlie demanded.
"She's just very tired, Charlie," I assured him quietly. I wanted to get Bella upstairs, so she could sleep. I would deal with Charlie later. "Please let her rest."
"Don't tell me what to do!" Charlie yelled. "Give her to me. Get your hands off her!"
I tried to pass Bella to Charlie, doubting his strength. But Bella clung to me with locked, tenacious fingers.
"Cut it out, Dad," Bella said with more volume. "Be mad at me."
"You bet I will be," Charlie promised. "Get inside."
'"Kay. Let me down," she sighed. It seemed that she was as unwilling to let go as I was. But I was not completely sure. And surely, I was not going to argue with Charlie now.
I set her on her feet, but Bella tripped, of course. My arms caught her before she hit the concrete.
"Just let me gether upstairs," I asked Charlie. "Then I'll leave."
"No," Bella cried.
"I won't be far," I promised, in a whisper too low for Charlie to hear.
I did not wait for Charlie's answer; I headed into the house. Bella fell asleep again as soon as we reached the stairs.
