A/N: Well it is great to be writing once again. It's been a while but I have been living a life that demands so much of me these days. I finally got a breath and decided to update the next chapter of Emmett's Confession. I hope you all enjoy. Reviews are welcomed and encouraging to writers. They also motivate. Thanks for reading and reviewing.
Carlisle's POV
The passage of time was usually a dissipating puff of air to people who existed forever, but time was our arch nemesis as we made the journey back home. We'd been traveling for quite a few hours and other than Emmett's cries, we progressed in total silence. By the time we arrived back in Forks, my son was completely exhausted from his injuries. I in turn was drained from that lethal battle with that revolting piece of filth and the entire ordeal. I was still carrying my resilient prince in my arms, though my other two had offered to relieve me and carry him part of the way. They knew I wasn't tired, but they were trying to help. However, I wasn't having that at all. There was no way I was going to be separated from my boy. For my own sanity, I needed to have Emmett attached to me. I couldn't release him.
"Dad." He whispered against my neck. "Dad it hurts so much." He moaned and I felt venom tears lightly grazing my chest as he cried against it.
"I know it does, Buzz." I tried to comfort him. "You're going to be alright. I promise. I'm going to take care of you."
"We're almost home, baby." Esme soothed. "Just a little bit longer."
"Ooh." He whined louder. I slowed my movements to prevent causing him more pain. "Oh, God. It hu-rts." The others slowed down as well.
"It's alright, Em." Edward's voice quivered as he reached over to stroke some hair out of his older brother's face. The love that the kids had revealed to each other throughout this nightmare overwhelmed me. Even now as I saw tears glistening in my youngest son's eyes for his brother, I was reassured that while Emmett was on the mend he had the love of his family to help him along…not that that was ever questionable.
A few tears stung my eyes as I watched Edward's affection for Em. Normally those two were at each other's skulls, and seeing this display was more than admirable. Jasper was projecting everything he could muster to create tranquility and for the most part he was successful. He looked sadly over at me when he felt my pain as did Edward when he intercepted it in my thoughts. They both stopped, and were visibly worried.
"Dad." I was fighting for control as Jasper wiped my face. "Dad, please give Em ta me." He pleaded. I shook my head and tucked my son closer to me as if Jasper was a lurking kidnapper or something. "I know it's hard for ya, so please let me help."
"He's fine." I told him. "I'm good. We are almost home."
Jasper didn't buy it and neither did the others. He reached for his brother, but I stepped back before he could take him from me.
'S'alrite, Dad." He put one arm around Emmett's waist and the other under his legs. "Please. I won't hurt him."
I stared at him, unjustifiably distrusting him. I knew he wouldn't harm him, but he was failing to understand my need to be close to Emmett right then. I'd mailed a personal invitation to thieves to come and nearly take him from me forever. My son…the son of my right hand…was almost demolished right before me because of my own stupidity and indiscretion. I was quite traumatized by that realization and my lips started quivering as I lost the struggle for control.
My perfect vision became clouded with tears and I faintly noticed the seemingly mixed emotions on the faces of my two girls and my wife. Esme looked as if she felt sorry for me, but yet blamed me for this. Alice looked like she wanted to hug me, but my darling Princess Rose looked sad, betrayed, yet grateful. I couldn't be sure of what they were thinking, but I knew they had to be thinking I was slum….a degradation to humanity and our kind. After all, I'd commanded Emmett to leave the safety of the only home he'd ever known, and single handedly delivered him into the hands of ungodly rubbish that cared nothing for his precious life. I looked down lovingly at my son and reluctantly handed him to his brother who, though he was smaller in frame, handled him as a delicate babe. I relaxed when Emmett seemed to settle in Jasper's strong arms, but I couldn't shake the overwhelming feeling of guilt.
After several more painstaking miles, we were walking into our living room. We followed Jasper upstairs to Emmett's bedroom and after he'd carefully placed him on the bed, I climbed on the bed beside him.
"How are you feeling, Buzz?" I asked him, easily stroking his matted hair and soiled face. "I'm so, so sorry." I apologized again. I didn't think I would ever be able to tell him that enough. What kind of man would turn his back on his own son? What kind of man would do this horrible thing to his child? I deserved to live with this for the rest of my existence. I certainly didn't deserve his forgiveness, though I prayed genuinely that he would forgive my transgression against him.
He barely looked at me as I stroked his cheek and then the back of his head again. "It hurts like a son of a gun." He whispered. His voice was extremely weak. "And I can't feel my anything in all this Tupperware you got me wrapped up in." I tried to embrace his humor, but failed. My heart was simply too heavy to receive it. "I sure hope this doesn't mess up my 'jewelry box.' I'm sure that won't sit well with Rosie." His eyes drooped with exhaustion and he dropped his forehead against mine. I hugged him close and our faces were mere centimeters apart.
"I sincerely love you, son." I told him. My tears stained his face when my face touched it. "I love you so much."
His breath fell softly on my face. "Pops…" He breathed. "You stomped some…some…" He swallowed. "…some major ass…and…and you're a mush bag." He gave a lifeless laugh and his voice was barely audible when he spoke. "Save…save that for…little…Eddie."
Normally Edward would have had a smart retort, but this time he was so consumed with worry for his big brother that he let it slide. He shrugged his insult off.
"I'm so sorry, Buzz." I repeated my mantra. I kept hugging him to me. "Your Daddy is so sorry that this has happened to you."
"No worries, big Pops." He said feebly. "As soon…" He swallowed again. "…as soon…as…I get better, I'm gone…gonna…open up a…can of whip ass…on…somebody.'
I shook my head and manage a smile. Somehow I knew he was serious. Hell. He'd probably try to track down the rest of that mobile garbage and have one big one-to-four showdown with them.
"Oh Emmett." I pulled him closer. "My Emmett."
"You know what?" He asked.
"What?" I looked up as Esme walked into the room with a basin full of soapy water. She avoided my pleading eyes. She was never going to forgive me. Once again I'd attacked one of her cubs and she was not at all happy about it. God help me. After that fight she and I had about Edward's punishment, I could only imagine what was in store for me.
Edward cleared his throat and I glanced quickly at him.
Am I right, Edward? I asked him silently. I knew he'd intercepted her thoughts about this situation.
He shook his head and I felt somewhat better knowing that there wouldn't be another blast out fight like we'd had before. I breathed a sigh of relief. I couldn't stand more of that.
"You smoked out there." Everyone laughed. "Ali?"
She giggled. She knew what he was about to ask him.
"…can you get…get… me a shirt that says… my Pops… can kick your Pop's butt?"
I shook my head and laughed softly. "Oh, Em."
"…then I can…wear it…and we can take…take a pic for face…book."
They laughed again, but I just smiled practically to myself. "Oh, Emmett." I repeated.
"Just sayin.' He murmured.
Although Emmett was trying to make light of this situation, I knew he was trying to alleviate some of my guilt. There was no way every person in the room couldn't feel it. Jasper was amplifying it and making it worse.
"Please forgive me." I begged again and again.
"It…was…all…" He coughed and moaned in pain. "God. I never hurt like this."
Esme looked at me and I nodded in understanding. There would be time later for this conversation. Right now, our son needed to 'rest.'
"Em, your mother has prepared a sponge bath for you." I explained. He groaned for at least an entire minute. I couldn't help but laugh out loud…just a little as did everyone else.
"Pops…" He coughed feebly again. "I know…I'm in a bad way…but ain't…ain't no way Mama…is…washin'…my…my goods! I'd rather… be back…in the woods."
I permitted myself to laugh again. "…I think she will do just fine, son." I teased.
"Po-ops…." He whined.
My family joined in the laughter. "Oh, Buzz." I stood up and took the basin from Esme and sat it on his night stand. "I think we'll let Rosie do the honors."
He didn't look up but laughed softly. "Much better choice, however Rosie would you be mad at me if I want Dad to do it?"
I looked over at my beautiful princess. She smiled and sat down beside him. "Of course not, but can you guys give us a few minutes first and then Daddy can come back in?"
"Sure princess." We all left the room so they could be alone. When we got outside in the hall I looked around at the rest of my family.
"I'm so sorry." Was all I could say to them. I mean what else could I say?
"It's okay, Daddy." Alice reassured me. "It will all be alright." I wasn't sure if or how she could see anything because at the moment my own mind wasn't clear and I couldn't formulate a thought well enough to pull anything coherent together for her to get a clear picture of the future.
Edward hugged me tightly.
"Dad, when everythin' settles, we kin all talk 'bout what happened and work it all out." It was Jasper's turn to hug me. "We're family, Dad. Em is home and we're all here. It will be just fine, you'll see."
My children were my life. Gifts from God above. They meant the world to me and right then, they were what I needed. I looked up and saw Esme looking at me. Part of her looked sympathetic, but part of her looked sad…almost disappointed that I allowed this to happened. I felt Edward squeeze me tighter when he intercepted that thought. I felt him shaking his head again to tell me I was thinking all wrong again. Maybe she wasn't as angry as I thought she was.
"I'm sorry, Esme." I apologized to her again and she nodded. Rosie came out of the room and I kept my eyes on my beautiful wife. "I'm sorry."
"He's all yours." Rosie said and my kids let me go. I released my gazed from Esme and pulled my princess to me. She hugged me, but quickly pulled away. While the look she gave me was not one of hate, it was very similar to the one her mother was giving me.
"I'm sorry baby girl." Solemn tears fell down her face. She seemed torn between trying to be angry with me for my part in this travesty and trying to show me love.
"Me too." She started sobbing and covered her face with her hands. I reached for her but she pulled away from me again. Shaking her head, she ran down the stairs.
"I got her Dad." Edward said. "Take care of Em."
I nodded and he left. Esme turned as well and walked down the hall to our bedroom. I started after her but Jasper stopped me. "It's okay Dad. Let me talk ta her."
I could hardly contain myself as I watched my son follow his mother to comfort her. I stared after them until they were behind closed doors and was faintly aware that my other princess was hugging me.
"Daddy, we will get through this." Alice repeated Jasper's words. She held my face between her delicate hands. "Everything will be alright. Mom and Rosie are upset but everything will be just fine. Trust me."
I nodded doubtfully and wiped my face. I exhaled and thanked her for her kindness.
"Go take care of Emmy. He needs you the most right now. I'm going to find Edward and Rosie."
I nodded again.
"Trust me Daddy. Everything will be fine." With that she skipped downstairs to find her siblings.
I stared at my bedroom door and was kicked in the gut when I heard my sweetheart crying her heart out to our son. What a mess I'd created.
I opened the door to Emmett's room and walked over to his bed. I was really amazed that he wanted me to give him his bath and not Rosie. Normally that would have been the kiss of death and I would have been sprayed with the black plague for even thinking about going anywhere near him with a bath cloth. I understood why he wanted me to do it though. He needed reassurance that I still loved and wanted him in my life. He wanted me to be near him.
"'S'Okay, Pops." He said. "All of this is my fault."
I walked over to the basin and squeezed the cloth so I could wash his face. I helped him sit upright on the bed and sat next to him. "Not all of it." I admitted as I started gently cleaning his soiled face with the tenderness that he needed his father to give him.
"Yes, I caused it. I lied…you gave me a concussion…then gave me your boot."
"A concussion, Em?" I rolled my eyes. "Really?"
"That's…how…I remember-Dad!" He groaned loudly as I began to check his bandages. "Oh God it hurts."
"I'm sorry." I apologized to him. "I know this hurts but I need to change out the bandages and remove your dirty clothes so that I can make sure everything is okay and bathe you."
He winced and groaned louder when I picked him up and laid him down flat on the bed. I was trying to be gentle, but I knew that no matter what the movement, he would feel every bit of what I was doing to him. I decided to remove the bandages around his arms first. Vampires were speedy healers and I was pleased to see that after removing his stained shirt, my venom remedy was indeed sealing his open wounds. Once I had completely removed the bandages, I carefully took one of his strong but very weak arms in my hands. He looked at me with fear in his eyes, but yet so much trust…and love. I smiled at him and though he didn't return it, I felt so much love for him right then.
As I began my examination, I was careful to keep him as calm as possible and my movements fluid to minimize the pain. "You know, Buzz, I broke my arm once when I was a lad." He whined a little when I lifted his arm for further examination. "I'd always dreamed of becoming an astronaut. That particular day my mission was to land on the moon."
He laughed feebly at me. "This ought to be good."
I chuckled softly and moved to the other arm. "At any rate, I decided that the moon would be imagined and the roof of our home was going to be the surface of the moon in which I was to land."
He laughed and complained from the painful movement of his arm.
"Don't laugh, buster. That plan was ingenious."
He laughed again but it quickly dissolved and was followed by a wail when I rotated his arms.
"Shh…it's alright, Buzz." His body trembled in pain. I slowed my ministrations to give him time to adjust. Once he settled down, I continued with caution. "My father was always telling me to stop jumping off of things. But did I listen? No I did not. That particular day I decided that my room was my spaceship and the window was the gate to the moon. I jumped and somehow lost my footing and landed on my arm causing it to break in two spots."
"Didn't have to be a rocket scientist to see that one coming." He mocked.
I smiled at him. "You better be glad you're in pain. Otherwise I would be so inclined to cause you a little."
His laugh was so weak that it broke my heart. I carefully began to remove the bandages from his hips. He nearly jumped off of the bed and I had to hold him down.
"Da—ad!" He yelped.
"I'm sorry Buzz. I'm so sorry."
Tears fell rapidly from his eyes. "Dad!"
With every cry he made, I could hear Esme crying down the hall for him. It was natural that she would feel his pain. She was his mother. How could she not?
I made quick work of removing the rest of the bandage amidst his suffering and stopped long enough to give him time to calm down again. I held him still in my arms and he cried out as the searing pain hit him. God this was killing me.
Shortly thereafter, I began to remove his tattered jeans so I could examine him. He didn't even try to fight me. Normally he would have been fighting mad at me for even thinking about seeing him close to or actually naked. He was crying so much that I decided it would be better to just tear them off of him so I slowly tore them at the side seams and gently removed the material from him, exposing his soiled boxers.
"Oh, God." I grunted almost to myself when I saw his wounds. I was almost about to lose the battle to keep my control when my son reach out and grabbed my wrist. I turned to face him with sheer desperation in my eyes. His tears matched mine. I felt so sorry and guilty for what I'd done to him. For casting him away from. I put my hand on the side of his face and leaned down to kiss him on his forehead. "Emm-"
He shook his head to stop me.
"I will always want you Buzz. I will never throw you away. I'm so sorry I lost control and asked you to leave. I was wrong to do that. This…" My voice hitched and I shook my head as I began to sob against his face. "This is my fault. All of it." Venom completely covered my face as I cried. "I caused this. I caused harm to come to you and my precious girl. I will never forgive myself for this."
He shook his head again causing his face to rub against mine. "Shh…Pops…" His voice was so soft, not the loud boisterous one he usually had. "I love you."
That was all that it took for me to completely fall to pieces. I crawled onto the bed nestled beside him, careful to avoid touching his wounds. We cried together for what seemed like hours. No other words needed to be said right then. All we needed was each other. After a short while, I went into the bathroom to clean my face and warm the water in his basin so I could finish giving him his bath.
"Well now this is going to suck." He whispered, trying to lighten the mood. "I'd rather get that strap."
"Oh, Emmett." I began washing his torso. He was quite soiled so I had to stop and change the water again.
"You know Dad." He said when I walked back into the room. "This would have been easier if you had ordered four of them sexy nurses to come in here and do this." I laughed. "Probably would have speeded up my recovery too."
"Or your demise once Rosie would have gotten a hold of you."
I think I must have cleaned every nook of his upper body because he started complaining. "Pops you are so slow and you're gonna wash my skin off."
"Well if you would bathe every day, you wouldn't need to be washed so thoroughly."
He whimpered when I took care of his wounds. "I like smelling funky. Keeps the man smell on me."
"Whatever you say, Buzz." I went to change the water again so I could start on the rest of his body.
"Everybody can't be as prissy as you Dad."
"Hmm." I looked down at him from my position near the night stand. I squeezed the cloth and applied more soap. "Prissy, eh?"
He seemed to blush a little when I moved to remove his boxers. "It's alright, Emmett. It's just me. I'm your father and I just want to make sure you are alright. There's no need to be embarrassed."
"This bites." He complained and I smiled.
I examined his wounds and was somewhat concerned with the way they were healing. His legs had sustained the most damage and the severity of the wounds was astounding. Those sorry punks had really meant to paralyze him. I remained calm and kept my face to my work so that my son could not intercept my concern for him and start to panic. The more I examined him the more I began to wonder if he would need a reset.
"Emmett, I'm going to try to gently rotate your hips. This will hurt and I'm so sorry but I need to make sure that you are healing properly." He nodded and let out a blood curdling scream when I moved his severely damaged joints. "I'm so sorry, Buzz." I strengthened my resolve through his screams and continued to try to maneuver his joints so that I would not have to do a complete reset of his limbs.
"AAAHHHHHHH. DAAAADDDD!" He shouted. "Oh god. Oh god."
"I know Emmett. I know, son. I'm…" I popped the joint of his left hip back in place and he raised his torso off of the bed when the pain terrorized his body. He screamed louder than he had since he'd been injured. My boys came sailing into the room with the girls in tow, but to protect Emmett's modesty, I waved them off. The girls left but the boys refused to leave their brother. Rosie wanted to stay but I got the feeling that she couldn't stand seeing him in this condition.
I immediately felt a powerful surge of calm come over me and Emmett relaxed as well though he was crying profusely. His two brothers didn't mind his nakedness at all. They could have cared less. All that mattered to them at the moment was being there for their big brother. They loved him and it showed.
"Dad, he's in more pain than you know." Edward told me reading his mind. Careful not to hurt him, he sat at Emmett's head and positioned his brother so that his head was in his lap. "It's alright Em. Shh. It's alright."
Jasper sat on the other side of his brother and caressed his head and the hair out of his face. He was suffering but he gladly took the blow so that he could be there for his brother.
"I know Edward. God I know, but if I don't do this he will not be able to walk." I chose to communicate with my youngest son through the portals of my mind because I didn't want to cause Emmett to panic. He nodded his understanding.
"Emmett, your Daddy is so sorry to have to do this." I reassured him as his brothers attempted to calm him down. "I'm done with this leg. I know that hurt you, Em. It will be over soon."
He cried and I took a deep breath and tucked my lips to keep from losing control for everyone's sake, especially Emmett's and Jasper's. I gave him a moment to rebound, but decided that there was not exactly a good time to finish this, so I moved to Edward's side of the bed to work on Emmett's right hip.
I was grateful that my boys were here this time to hold him down because he wailed loudly again and tried to buck against what was happening to him. I heard my wife and daughter comforting Rosalie as I continued my efforts to make sure my son would be able to have full mobility of his limbs again. For the next few minutes I rotated and adjusted his hips, knees and feet so that he would completely heal properly. By the time I was finished, he was done. He'd lost it.
The boys continued to show him love and console him while I finished his bath and put a fresh pair of bandages and pajama pants on him. I decided to forego the shirt and boxers to make it easier to handle him in the future. Once I was finished, Jasper placed him in the center of the king size bed. He was still whimpering from the pain of this horrific ordeal when his brothers pulled the covers over him and sandwiched him between them. What a sight to behold as I watched them completely envelope him. I stood there for a moment watching them and decided it was time for me to shower.
"Emmett."
He was still crying. I walked over to the bed.
"Emmett, how are you feeling?"
He didn't reply but buried his face in Jasper's chest. I looked to Edward for an answer. Normally I would not encourage the head snooping, but I really needed him to help me understand where Emmett's mind was.
He gave me the 'ok' symbol to let me know that his brother was settling down. I nodded.
"Emmett, Daddy loves you and I will be back in shortly. I'm going to take a shower and check on your mother and the girls and I will come back in to check on you."
"God please don't." His words were very muffled against his brother's chest. "Forget my address."
I smiled and welcomed his humor.
Jasper and Edward smiled but kept him close.
"I'll be back." I promised them.
"Take your time." They said. "We got this."
I smiled again and left to go comfort my girls.
A/N: Wow…Emmett's pain…Carlisle has to deal with his own guilt, his son's pain, and the big elephant in the room…how they got there in the first place…Please Review! Thanks and hope to update soon.
