Hey! No corner today and I will be really quick.

So here is the first Entry of Esme's Diary! I really wanted to show her change of personality and the way her father's death affected her.

I now have a facebook group for my story! So if you want insider's information, teasers and all the other sweetness please join! 'Jaymili Fanfiction Group'! We're waiting for you!

A big thank to Casper15, you're the best!

Disclaimer: I own nothing!


Esme's Diary – Entry 1

Friday 16th of March ~ 12:00

Today is my birthday! I am six and Daddy said tonight we will all go to the restaurant that sells the shellfishes and we like it, because it's near the water. It's the ocean like in the Ariel movie. I am so happy! We were supposed to go to the pool today but Daddy said he had to go and take the pretty photos for his work. I was mad but he said sorry and gave me my present early! It's a pink bicycle with sparkles and it's so pretty! Car cried because he wanted one too but he is too little. I told him I will teach him how to ride one when he gets bigger.

We are spending the day at Maria's house, she's our neighbor. She's great but she's not my bestest friend, my bestest friend is Car because he is funny and he's my little brother and because Daddy said family is first! I was a little happy to come here because Maria's mommy makes the yummiest cookies and she gives us a lot because Daddy doesn't know how to make 'em and we don't have a Mommy.

Daddy said Mommy loved us and didn't have a choice but to leave us, but I know it's not true. I was little but I remember when Uncle Eddie came here when Car was a baby and she just left. They thought I was sleeping but I needed to go potty and heard them in the living room. Daddy said that she never wanted us and it was all a lie, she only wanted his money and she had another friend and he's a boy.

I didn't tell Car because he thinks that we have a mommy and she will come back and play with us. But I know she won't. But it's ok. We have Daddy and Uncle Eddie. He is so cool! We don't see him a lot but sometimes we talk on the computer and he sends us presents.

Daddy and Uncle Eddie are bestest friends like Car and me. It's family! And family stays together! That's why I am a little sad that Daddy can't stay for my birthday today. But soon the night will be here and he will come back. I trust him.


Friday 16th of March ~ 18:00

Maria's Mommy is acting strange. She was ok but then the phone was ringing and after she talked she was being different. She keep looking at us like she is going to cry. Adults, seriously…

I looked at the time and it was almost night and Daddy still was not here. He promised he would be here but I don't think he will be here on time.

I was looking out the window to see if I could see Daddy when I saw a police car coming and it stopped in front of Maria's house. Hmmm… I wonder what is going on? I run down the stairs to tell everyone there are police here but when I get in the living room, the doorbell rings and two big scary men in police clothes come in. When I hear our names I immediately run to find Car so we can hide. I saw on TV that the police take people to prison! I don't wanna go and Car is still little and I have to protect him. We hide under the bed in Maria's room and Car starts to cry because it's dark and he is scared. I tell him to shut it before they find us but he just cries louder so I have to put my hand on his mouth. He was crying so much I didn't hear the door open and then I feel a hand on my shoulder.

Oops. They found us.


Friday 16th of March ~ 21:00

They said Daddy is gone.

They said the car burned and he is gone and went to heaven.

Gone just like magic.

But I don't understand.

He promised! He promised he would be here and now he is gone!

Where did he go?

Can we go too? Maybe there is a restaurant with fishies there too and we can have my birthday and play together. So why did he go alone?

I asked the police if maybe we could go with Daddy but they said we can't. They said it's not possible to go with him because he is in heaven and we can't go to heaven like that.

I don't want to hear what they say I want to talk to my Daddy! Car wants to talk to Daddy too so he starts to cry but I didn't. I am a big girl and big girls don't cry.

They wanted to take us in the police car to go somewhere but we didn't want to. Daddy said we have to wait here! We started to run to hide again but they catched us and put us in the car. I wanted to scream at them but I couldn't because Car was still crying. I put my arms around him and told him not to cry, that everything will be okay, just like Daddy does when I cry.

The car stops and they get us out and take us into a scary building. We sit down in squeaky chairs and a police lady comes to us and showed us a picture with Daddy in it. She asked if he was our Daddy and I told her that 'of course he is, silly!'. Before she could leave I ask again why we came here because Daddy said he will get us at the neighbor house for my Birthday and we swear we didn't steal anything.

Even if he was late it's okay; I can wait. Because he is my Daddy.


Friday 16th of March ~ 21:30

Daddy is dead.

They said Daddy is dead.

Like in the movies.

He won't come back ever.

Not for my birthday and not for Car's birthday.

Now it's only the two of us.

I have to protect him.

It's just Car and me. No one else.

So I can't cry, I won't cry.

I am a big girl.

I am a big girl…

I am a big girl…


Saturday 17th of March ~ 14:00

Uncle Eddie is coming to get us and take us with him to American States.

I don't want to go. I want to stay in Daddy and our house. I don't know United Americas or whatever. But I know Uncle Eddie has to work like Daddy's work is to take pictures.

I miss my Daddy. I miss him so much and it hurts in my chest.

Carlisle is still crying and it's hard to not cry when he is. But I can't. Daddy is strong and he don't cry because he protects us. I have to do the same for Car. He don't understand that Daddy won't come back and I have to be careful and make him understand that maybe Uncle Eddie won't stay forever, just like Daddy. He always said he couldn't come to see us often because he was 'busy'.

If he is too busy to take us, will we come back to the police?

My chest hurts again. I want to cry. But I can't.

I just can't .


Saturday 17th of March ~ 18:00

I think we changed places. We are not with the police anymore.

Here the room is grey. But there is a bed and a TV.

Uncle Eddie is still not here.

Will he come get us soon?

I am tired.


Sunday 18th of March ~ 18:00

He is still not here.

I don't think he will come.

My chest hurts again.

Car is crying.

I take him in my arms.

I protect him.


Monday 19th of March ~ 15:00

Uncle Eddie came.

He promised everything will be ok.

But he doesn't understand.

Daddy is gone he won't come back, how can it be ok now?

Daddy promised we will always be together but he left. He promised!

It's not ok.

It's not ok because adults are liars!

I want to go home.

Car is crying again.

And my chest hurts.

So much.


Here it is! What did you think? It was a little hard to write this _

Please review! And the reviewers who didn't review chapter 5 but review this will still get the long preview of Chapter 6! The short version is already on the Group page!

Don't forget to join guys!

Love ya! ;)