"Gregory House, you are coming to the party with me, whether you like it or not!"

House nearly fell out of his chair, surprised that Wilson had managed to find the courage to yell at him after he had performed humiliating oral sex on him in one of the vacant sleep study rooms earlier. The man should have been snuggling him and smothering him with thanks, not scolding him for stubbornly choosing to remain in his lonely office instead of going to some stupid celebration for some insignificant birth of some phony prophet.

"No," House replied.

Wilson grimaced.

"House, if you don't get out of that chair right-"

"What are you going to do?" He asked arrogantly, Mockingly replying to his own question with another; "Is mean old Mr. Wilson gonna tell Cuddy on me?"

Unsurprisingly immaturely, the diagnostician made a pouty face. He proceeded to pretend like he was wiping tears away from his up, Wilson grabbed the abnormally large tennis ball off of the edge of House's desk, walked out onto the balcony, and chucked it as hard as he could. House looked like he was about to cry, his eyes widening in horror as the realization of the loss of his stress-reducing toy set in.

Wilson came back into the office and just stared at him.

"Why…Why is the world so cruel?" House cried as he slammed his head into the glass table he used as a desk.

"Get up and come on, or Mr. Ball won't be the last thing I throw out."

Morose with mourning over his materialistic loss, House stood up and grabbed his cane. After mustering the meanest looking expression he could, he grabbed his leather jacket and book bag, proceeding to follow 's murderer into the hallway. The area was abandoned; most employees currently taking part in the Christmas celebration.

"I'll get you another ball," Wilson replied, suddenly feeling guilty for violently pitching House's favorite toy into the harshness of winter.

"Why do you want me to go to this stupid thing so badly, anyway?"

"You need some friends," Wilson replied.

"All of the people down there hate me."

"Not all of them."

"Name one person who doesn't hate my guts."

"Thirteen," Wilson relied with ease, "Chase, Foreman, Taub…"

"That doesn't count. They work for me, so they either have to hate me, or deal with me and hate their jobs."

"Not true."

They stepped into the elevator and Wilson pushed the button that would take them to the first floor.

"Yes, true."

"House- Whether you like it or not- they love you. And you love them back, but you're too afraid to admit it. And I think that the only reason you don't want to go to this party is because you're afraid that you'll enjoy yourself."

"You better buy me a new ball."

"Stop deflecting."

"I'm not deflecting."

"You were."

"I'm atheist, Wilson!"

"What the hell does that have to do with- Oh, you're talking about my original argument."

House congratulated him on his magnificent deducing skills.

"Atheism is not a valid argument," Wilson retorted.

House cocked an eyebrow, intrigued by his friend's implication.

"Look, you're going-"

"Whether I like it or not," House interrupted in a whiny, childlike tone. "Heard you the first five-thousand times, Jimmy."

"And we both know that you'll like it, because- like I established before- you'll enjoy hanging out with the team."

On that note, the elevator door opened, and Wilson grabbed his arm, dragging him into the main hallway. The diagnostics team was hanging out next to an obnoxiously decorated Christmas tree, seemingly uninterested in their superior's arrival.

"Hey guys, what's up?" Wilson greeted them with a bright smile.

Taub, Hadley,Foreman, and Chase. All four of the annoying minions were present.

"Hey, Wilson!" Chase replied.

The three others greeted the friendly doctor with smiles, and then turned their attention to House, whose pitiful grimace seemed out of place among the group of happy, celebratory beings. Thirteen was the first to actually acknowledge he was there. She hugged him, and then told him that she was happy he had chosen to come. House looked confused; the possibility that these people actually liked him a difficult thing to grasp. And then Chase also hugged him. Taub was smart enough to simply offer a handshake, and Foreman just nodded in House's direction.

He appreciated Foreman's greeting most.

"So," Foreman started, "Why are you here?"

"House is here," Wilson replied, "For Jesus."

"You dragged him out of that cold, dark shell of an office in an attempt to help him socialize and gain friends. " Thirteen corrected.

"Exactly."

House groaned, becoming more irritable as time went by.

Wilson kindled a bubbly conversation with the group, and House mainly just watched and listened, not really paying attention. He sort of just drifted off into his own world as they discussed patients, or family, or past Christmas experiences. Nothing they were talking about would have interested him, anyway.

After a while, He slipped away from the group and ended up on a bench next to the front doors of PPTH; alone once again. It was approximately fifteen minutes before anybody approached him.

"Hey."

House looked up to meet gazes with Wilson, who was holding two Styrofoam cups filled with hot coffee. He had ditched the diagnostician's minions so that he could hang out with his depressively anti-social friend.

"Thanks."

Wilson handed him a cup, then sat down next to him.

"No problem, it's-"

"It's what friends do," House said for him.

Wilson just nodded, and then stared blankly at his own coffee cup for a moment.

"But we aren't friends, Wilson."

Shocked, Wilson returned his attention to the man sitting beside him.

"What do you-"

"I think we both know that it's way beyond that, now."

Silence ensued as Wilson found himself at a loss for words. He was simply surprised by the fact that House was actually acknowledging that there was a deeper meaning to the relationship that they had.

"House…I… I don't know what to say…"

"Just agree with me, you idiot."

He gave his friend a smile and nodded. Of course he agreed with him. Hell, Wilson knew that their intimacy was more than that way before his friend did. After all, he was much more mature than House, and didn't have nearly as many issues with commitment, either.

"Hey guys," Thirteen interjected, "What you talking about?"

"Hello Doctor Hadley," Wilson replied, "How are you this evening?"

"Fantastic," She replied a little too cheerily.

House peered at her through squinted eyes, knowing that something was off. Almost as if she could read his mind, Thirteen told him that there was nothing to worry about; she was just making sure that Wilson fulfilled his civic duties. On that note, the young female doctor pointed at something above their heads. Both men looked up, finding that there had been a little green twig strategically placed about a foot from the top of their heads. It was leafy and had small white berries.

"Misteltoe…" House and Wilson replied simultaneously.

"Sure is."

House and Wilson returned their attention to Thirteen, who was waiting for the appropriate response.

"I hate you," Was Wilson's reply.

"I'm not kissing that idiot," House stated, "He'd enjoy it too much."

Wilson jerked his gaze over to House, silently scolding him. Thirteen continued to wait for the kiss, though, as she firmly planted her feet and crossed her arms. Finally, House noticed that the rest of the diagnostics team was staring at them.

"How much?" He asked.

"How much what?" Thirteen asked in reply.

"Money. How much money?"

"I don't know what you're talking about."

House peered around her, finding that his subordinates were still watching him and Wilson closely, as if expecting something. So it was only reasonable for him to assume that Thirteen had told them about her attempt to get Wilson to kiss him. And if that was the case, then Chase would have undoubtedly opened a betting pool. If there was money in the picture, then House wanted in on it.

"They're clearly staring at me for some reason," House replied, "And I know it's because there's money involved, and the suspense here is killing them. So tell me how much is in the pool, and then I'll tell you my price."

"Twelve hundred. Three-hundred each."

"If you're lying to me, and I find out, I'll tell the rest of the team that you rigged it."

Wilson looked at Thirteen like she was crazy.

"You idiots are betting three-hundred dollars on a kiss!?" He replied.

"No," She looked over at the oncologist, "I'm betting three-hundred on the kiss. Those idiots are betting that it'll never happen. Six-hundred on them. Well, except for Chase."

"Chase?" House asked.

"Yeah, he knows that you'll do it."

"How so?"

"Because," Thirteen said like it was evident," He says that no matter what, House will kiss Wilson, because he knows that it will freak him out. And there's nothing that House enjoys more than being able to freak Wilson out."

House shrugged, knowing that it was true. Even though Wilson would no longer freak out if he kissed him, House truly didn't enjoy anything more than freaking his friend out.

"So," Thirteen continued, "If you kiss Wilson, I'll give you two-hundred.."

"Two-fifty," House haggled, "Plus an extra thirty-dollar incentive for not ratting you out."

"Twenty.''

"Twenty-five."

"Twenty!"

"How about you give me the thirty, and I'll slip in some tongue?"

Wilson shoved him and he almost fell off of the bench. Thirteen laughed, quite amused by how red Wilson's face was turning due to his friend's embarrassing remark. She apologized to Wilson for using him to make money, and then House told him that this all technically made him a prostitute, which received more laughs out of the young female doctor. Wilson did not seem nearly as amused.

"Twenty-five," Thirteen finalized, "And you'll make it convincing."

"You got a deal."

Although a little annoyed by the fact that House was haggling money over a kiss with him, Wilson couldn't help but be a bit impressed by House's persuasion skills. After all, he had managed to earn himself one-hundred and seventy-five dollars within only three minutes. Of course, Wilson would expect his share later.

"What do I get out of this?" Wilson asked.

House and Thirteen looked over at him, surprised.

"Well? He asked as if it were only evident that he'd want in on it, "You expect me to let this jackass deflower me without my own incentive? I might be a kindhearted, giving person, but I'm not nearly that selfless."

He looked to House for an answer. In reply, his friend agreed to pay him half of the two-fifty, but wanted to keep the extra twenty-five. Wilson was perfectly fine with that.

Still, the rest of the team was waiting for results. Knowing so, Thirteen obnoxiously pointed to the mistletoe and put her hand on her hip so that it appeared like she was arguing with them. Truthfully, she was telling House that he'd have to be the one to make a move, because nobody believed that Wilson would do it. Especially since Wilson had already failed to kiss the man once before.

Quickly, House grabbed his cane and wrapped it around Wilson's neck, pulling him in so that he could plant a kiss right on his lips. House lingered there for a moment, and then backed off. As soon as the cane was no longer around his neck, Wilson stood up and made a disgusted expression, wiping his mouth with the sleeve of his shirt.

"I really didn't think he'd do it," Foreman replied rather coolly, leaning against the service desk.

Taub just stared, unbelieving of what had just happened while Chase threw his fist into the air victoriously. Thirteen was also silently cheering herself on, but remained calm as she walked back to the men awaiting her arrival.

"Pay up, boys."

Foreman and Taub gave Chase three-hundred dollars each, and then did the same with Thirteen. Although Chase had technically won more than she, Thirteen found herself content with it. After all, a small win was better than no win at all. Plus, she got to have a little fun with it. Turning back towards House and Wilson, she saw that the two of them were already divulging in another friendly conversation. Not wanting to interrupt House's rather happy mood, she decided it would be best to pay the men some other time.

"So, House… You wanna talk about this?" Wilson asked, going back to the subject they were on before Thirteen had arrived.

"I'm not big on talking about my feelings. You know that, Wilson."

"I know. We'll have to work on that," He replied, wrapping his arm around House's shoulder.

"Yeah."

"I just want to make it clear. I mean, I want you to clarify- for me- what you see this as."

"I dunno," House replied, "I just… I understand that it's more than what it used to be."

"I'm not just a booty call?" Wilson asked jokingly.

House shook his head.

"So, what am I?"

"I said I dunno!"

Wilson retracted his arm, letting out a stressful sigh. Even when House was trying to be compliant, he still ended up being stubborn.

"Just say it," Wilson replied.

"Say what?" House asked.

"Boyfriend."

"Yuck," House replied childishly, "It's just too…superficial."

Wilson furrowed his thick eyebrows in frustration, wondering if that was the correct word.

"I think you mean superfluous," He replied, "You think it's too superfluous, don't you?"

"No," House immediately argued, "Of course not, Wilson."

"What is it, then?"

"It's just…"

"Yes?"

"You're my boyfriend? I mean… It just sounds weird to say. Boyfriend. See, the actual word sounds perfectly fine, but then when I say "Wilson is my boyfriend," it sounds weird. The word makes me feel overwhelmingly Sapphic. "

"Uh, yeah. That's normal."

"No, it's not. I'm not a stereotypical gay who talks with a very feminine voice and dresses in deep v-necks and skinny jeans while carrying around a satchel and wearing makeup."

Wilson couldn't help but laugh at House's dreadfully judgmental image of the common homosexual.

"Just say it, already."

House rolled his eyes, feeling ridiculous.

"I can't."

"Why not?"

"I haven't asked you out, yet. So I obviously can't consider you a boyfriend."

"…"

"So, will you go out with me, Wilson?" House asked quietly, so as to make sure nobody else heard him.

Wilson was the one to roll eyes this time, annoyed by House's need to make everything so complicated and tedious. But,yes, of course he would go out with him.

"Great," House replied, "You'll buy me dinner tomorrow. That'll make it official."

"What?"


Say hello to the longest chapter so far! I dunno, I just had some fun with this one. Anyways, I just wanted to check in and say hello and thanks to all of my readers/followers/reviewers. Hope you enjoy...and I'll get the rest of this done as soon as I can. Hilson FTW!