A/N: So this is what happens when I'm supposed to work on my English paper…
Chapter Eight- Snow's Proposition
This is not good. This is not good. This is not good.
Last night's events seem to blur together, but yet I know what happened. How could I let that happen? Was I thinking? I know for a fact I wasn't drunk, so that can't be my excuse… but Haymitch was. This is all his fault. He was drunk and I was vulnerable, and he took advantage of me.
I can't worry about that now, though, because now I just need to think of a way to slip out of his bed without waking him. I can feel the sheets warming my bare skin, and that's almost a slap in the face now. Yes, World, I know I slept with Haymitch. Thanks for reminding me.
Haymitch is still sleeping, and one of his arms is thrown across my stomach, almost like he's holding me down. I've woken up Haymitch before, and it's not a pretty scene. Especially when he has a knife. I slowly lift his arm to make sure he doesn't wake. Then I slip out and put his arm back.
Then I look at myself, and realize how ridiculous I must look. Being naked just adds to that factor. I hurry and put my clothes on—which happens to be a treasure hunt of itself, because my clothes are sprawled all across his room.
I get the hell out of his house and then barely walk two steps to get to mine. I wonder how I'm going to explain this to my brothers… Haymitch was drunk and I had to take care of him. Yeah, that'll be my excuse. Hopefully it'll work out, though, because I'm a terrible liar.
"Hey, where did you go last night?" Abercrombie asks right as I step foot into my house.
"I had to take care of Haymitch," I respond. To avoid further interrogation, I rush upstairs to my room before Abercrombie has the chance to ask anything else.
When I get to my room, I flop onto my bed, and a flood of memories from last night fill my head. Haymitch kissing me, me appreciatively kissing back, going up to his room… I thought it'd be different. I thought I'd feel different. I'm a woman now, right? But for some strange reason, I compare myself to those poor girls that sell themselves to Peacekeepers. I didn't sell myself, though… I willingly did this. Maybe it's because I don't love him. There was no connection last night; it was only physical. He didn't hold me afterwards; I didn't stay the morning…
I have a mini-seizure on my bed. How could I let this happen? I'm smarter than this! All I'm going to get out of this is broken ego. How am I supposed to look at Haymitch now? Should I just act like this never happened?
Because fate just loves me, though, I'll find myself face-to-face with Haymitch in a matter of hours. It's time for my Victory Tour! I trust Abercrombie with the boys, and I feel much safer now knowing that they're in a nicer home.
I don't need to pack anything for the tour; Jaxith will take care of my wardrobe. I show up at the train station resisting the urge to just run for it. I know that will get me absolutely nowhere. I climb aboard the train and see the smiling faces of Jaxith and Quarter! Oh, how exciting it is to see their faces and to hear their accents!
Haymitch joins us a couple of minutes later and I do the best I can to avoid eye contact. I need something to say to him… I just need to figure out what…
With no warning, the train pulls out of the station with jump, and I fall onto Haymitch. Simply fabulous. He grabs me as my hands fall on his chest. More images from the night before pop into my head. I look up at him for the first time, hoping the images aren't being reflected in my eyes, but Haymitch just looks like regular, hazy Haymitch. Our awkward pose is held for just a moment too long. I don't realize this until Haymitch lets go of me and does this weird cough thing. I quickly turn away from him and then go to my room.
Most of my Victory Tour can be summed up as this: Speeches, dinner, meeting dead children's parents. Oh, and avoiding Haymitch. Then, it's time for me to go to the Capitol.
I definitely have a lighter conscience here. No dead children dwell here, only happy children. I don't have to look into the eyes of mourning parents.
My party is pretty happening, if I do say so myself. I'm having a good time, pretending to sip on my alcohol, talking to a past victor when I feel a cold hand on my shoulder. I turn around and see the President looking down on me. I convinced Jaxith to let me wear flats, so now I'm shorter than most people here.
"Ms. Forrester," he greets me and gives me some odd looking smile. "May I have this dance?" A slow song just came on and I see couples on the dance floor. Stunned, I nod and he takes me hand. His hand is so freezing that I'm almost scared if my hand will melt it.
I look at the couple next to me and see that the girl has her hands over the boy's neck, so that's what I do to Snow. He takes my hips and I have another flashback: the night of the interviews when Haymitch asked me to dance. He kissed me that night… why would he do that? Suddenly I'm angry at him and I know exactly why. He took advantage of me that night, too! I was positive I was going to die the next day, and he felt the need to slam out lips together.
"Ms. Forrester," Snow breaks the silence. "I have a proposition for you."
Uh-oh. This can't be good. "What is it?"
"You happen to be a desirable victor, are you aware of that?" I nod my head. "Desirable victors can acquire a lot if they listen closely to me. Rich men are offering to have you, Ms. Forrester, I would know. I've seen some of the offers."
"Have me?" I ask confused, "Like marriage?"
Snow laughs like I had just said the funniest thing. "Not marriage! Some of these men are already married! They just want you for one night, but their price can pay for a lifetime of happiness if you play my game." Suddenly I get it. President Snow wants me to sell my body like those poor girls in District 12.
"No," I say as my voice cracks, "I won't. I can't."
Snow laughs again. "Don't you see, Ms. Forrester? You have to! Or there will be consequences."
"No," I repeat again and let go of him. He doesn't let go of me, though. In fact, he pulls me even closer so I can feel him breathing in my ear.
"You've been warned, Ms. Forrester." He says in the most frightening snarl I have ever heard. He lets go of me and gives me a hard push. I stumble a little, but then I run out to get air.
I've been warned? What's he going to do? He can't do anything, I'm a victor! I'm supposed to be safe! I'm breathing heavily and I'm willing tears back into my eyes. I can't lose it here at my party. My party, which should be happy and cheerful; not filled with sin and hate!
Quarter finds me outside clutching my stomach. I feel nauseous. "Madigan! Are you okay?"
"Yeah," my voice cracks again. "Just got a little hot in there,"
"Well come back in! It's freezing out here!" Quarter grabs me and I have no other choice but to go back in.
I notice that the president left. Serves him right, threatening me.
Finally, after an eternity, I'm home. I rush to my house, longing for Avery's innocent laugh and Jesse's hugs. Instead, when I open the door, I find no one. First this strikes me as odd. Don't they know that I'm coming home today? Then I think that Abercrombie must have taken them to Town or somewhere, so I decide to go and look for them.
I'm at the town, but I still can't find the black haired boys that should be so easily spotted here. I'm welcomed home by many strangers whose names escape me, and some of them comment on how they can't wait for the Harvest Festival tonight. The Harvest Festival. Crap.
I'm getting really worried about my brothers now, so I decide to ask someone. I enter a store and an older woman is behind the counter.
"Hello," she says in a strained voice. She doesn't recognize me. She's using the voice most town people use to Seam people.
"Hi," I respond. "Have you happened to see any of the Forrester boys?"
The lady pulls a sympathetic face, "Didn't you hear? They were all found dead in their house yesterday morning. Carbon something… monomers? Monoxide? Something like that. Such a shame… their sister was on her Victory Tour."
Dead? They can't be dead. No. Yesterday morning? That means they died a couple of nights ago… A couple of nights ago I was at the Capitol. A couple of nights ago I was dancing with the president… "You've been warned, Ms. Forrester." No. No! He did not kill my brothers! He didn't even give me a chance to change my mind! I would have done anything to save my brothers!
I think the lady recognizes me now, because her face got more sympathetic and she asked me if I needed anything, free of charge. I don't answer her. I can't answer her. I run outside of her shop to a trashcan and my breakfast leaves me. Dead. I can't accept it.
I walk back to Victor's Village, but I go to the house right before mine. Haymitch's house. I don't know where else to do. I lamely knock on the door and he opens seconds later. I can't hold them in anymore, tears just come.
"He-he-he killed muh-muh-myy brothersss!" I cry out and put my hands on my eyes, wiping tears away. Haymitch doesn't say anything, but he holds me tight. It's not the lusting feeling that he had the night we slept together, but rather a comforting feeling. He brings me to his couch and he continues to hold me as I cry. He rubs my shoulders and wipes my tears when I'm too tired to. For some reason, he reminds me of my mom. She used to make the worst possible situations feel better, and that's how I feel with Haymitch right now.
Eventually, he takes me home and that's when I realize I've missed the Harvest Festival. Haymitch leads me up to my bed. He tucks me in and kisses my forehead, reminding me of my mother once again. He leaves my room and when I hear the front door shut, I jump out of bed and go to my telephone.
I dial the Capitol and ask for the president. The lady on the other end tells me that he's been expecting a call from me.
Snow answers with a, "I can still do a lot for you, Ms. Forrester. Would you like to rethink your answer?"
"Yes."
A/N: It had to happen! Who's heard of a happy, whole, complete victor? Unheard of!
Ugh… I guess now I have to write about Social Class of the 1800s… Eww…
Madii!
