Naruto: Midnight, Itachi got into my sugar stash again! I thought you changed the locks!
...You know, if you weren't cute then I would think that you were whining.
Kyuubi: Naruto doesn't whine.
Naruto: HA!
Kyuubi: He just gets so annoying that you give up and let him have his way.
Naruto: ...Usually I would be insulted but now that I think about it...
Itachi: WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!
Scar: ...Please tell me that Itachi wasn't just running around naked.
Vincent: ...Itachi Uchiha was not just running around naked.
Alucard: It was just a trick of the light in the room.
Sephiroth: WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
Scar: Then what the hell was that?!
Cloud: ...Another trick of the light?
Kyuubi: ...Can it happen again?
Cloud: (Supah Ebil Uke Glare of Crotch-Kicking DOOM)
Naruto: As a fluent speaker in Uke, I would say that that's a no... And I advise you to wear a cup...
Scar: ...Midnight-sama doesn't own Naruto and there is slight OCness in this fic from all characters just for kicks and giggles.
---
Prodigy
People say prodigies aren't made, they are born. That's the biggest lie I've ever been told in my life. Trust me, I know people. I'm a people person... Seriously, I am!
For example, you've heard of Rock Lee, right? Guy with the green spandex and fuzzy eyebrows, fashion sense of a blind man? He's a prodigy and he sure as hell wasn't born one. He trained day and night to get where he is now and he's the only one that has ever come close to beating Gaara no Subaku. The only reason Sasuke almost kicked Gaara's ass was because of Lee. Fuckin' Sharingan… Next time I see that bastard I'm gonna kick his ass and drag him back home. Kyuubi thinks I can do it so anyone that says otherwise can shove it.
Speaking of Uchihas… I don't know what happened in that gene pool but I'm kind of glad that there are only two of them left. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure not all Uchiha were revenge-seeking, power hungry, sexy bastards. However, since I've only known two, that's just my general opinion of them. Maybe I should ask Kakashi what Obito was like… I heard he was pretty cute so score one for the Uchihas!
Anyway, back to this prodigy nonsense. The person that came up with that word needs to be dragged out into the street then shot. Sure, someone may be born doing something well but if they wish to excel then have to practice until it becomes second nature. Take Neji for example. Do you think he was always that good? Sure, he had the looks but do you how many times he failed? A LOT. And I mean A LOT. Just because the scars can't be seen doesn't mean that they're not there. After all, I should know.
And the thing is those that are prodigies aren't really prodigies. They are not perfect beings blessed with gifts that came from god. They are all freaks, every single one of them are all freaks. I would use the Smallville analogy but I'd rather not because Itachi loves that show. I think he almost loves it more than me... But I can give him something Smallville can't and I'm not talking about new episodes every day... Hey! Don't look at me like that! Do you have any idea how hard it is to compete with Tom Welling for Itachi's attention? Thought so...
But I digress, excuse me for getting off-topic... All prodigies are freaks and have only received their so called gifts through genetic mutation. We all know the Byakugan and the Sharingan aren't normal but we've learned to live with them... I don't know how but we have.
Besides, you only achieve anything through hard work determination and-
"...Naruto, are you writing in your diary?"
"...Itachi?"
"...Yes?"
"GET. OUT."
"Gladly."
...You can only achieve anything through hard work determination and buying new locks on all doors and windows... Stupid Uchiha stealth... And it's not a diary! ...It's a journal. Everybody knows that boys have journal, only girls have diaries and I am very male! ...Shut up, Kyuubi. I ONLY DID THAT ON A DARE!
...Anyway, prodigies do not exist. We are all just people trying to-
"NARUTO!"
"...What is it now, Itachi?"
"We're out of milk."
"...Is that all?"
"...Yes."
"I'll go get some later, okay?"
"M'kay."
...We are all just people trying to do what we do best: survive.
---
Scar: ...What's the moral of the story?
..Moral? What is this "moral" that you speak of?
Scar: ...I'm sorry, I forgot who I was talking to for a second.
Itachi: WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
Alucard: That's it, I'm going to go get the hose now...
Naruto: Eeeeeeeeeeeee...
Sephiroth: WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
Naruto: ...Wait for me, Alucard!
Vincent: ...I fear this won't end well.
Cloud: I whole-heartedly agree but exactly how hard do you think Alucard will blast 'em?
Kyuubi: Who cares?! They're gonna be wet AND naked! It's the best of both worlds!
Naruto: Only if it's YOUR world, you perverted fur ball!
Kyuubi: Hey, a man has needs!
Cloud: ...Uh, you're not a man.
Vincent: You're a nine-tailed fox demon with the mind of a five year old and the lecherous nature of Uncle Joe...
Cloud: ...Uncle Joe?
Vincent: You don't want to know...
Naruto: Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee...
...Review?
