Chapter Eight:

Slowly her mind filtered through the darkness and she began to respond more with each day.

She still slept most of the time which kept Grissom on edge, fearful she would slip back into the black hole she had just returned.

He seemed anxious each time she woke, asking a barrage of questions, making sure she was still aware of her surroundings.

With each day, he grew more confident that she was on the road to recovery.

Her body was already mending.

Her emotional and cognitive health was still an issue.

With every response, he rewarded her with a kiss.

She yearned for his affection and focused on his face as he began to talk about the others.

"Ray will be back later. The guys came by…they want to see you."

His hand gently nudged her to look at him. "Sara…I know we have a lot to talk about but…"

She tensed, pulling back. "It's okay," he soothed. "Honey, we have to know about your injuries. You hurt your head."

Her hand drifted to her head. "That's it…you had a severe concussion…there was some brain swelling. We need you to answer some questions…simple questions…okay? Nod if you understand."

She nodded and he thought he would weep.

His hand caressed her cheek as he tried to compose himself.

He could not believe that she was actually responding to him.

The last few days had been excruciating on his heart.

He couldn't imagine seeing her lie in a vegetative state for the rest of her life.

"Do you know me?" he managed to get out.

I know you, Gil…

Better than you know yourself…

She attempted to speak but couldn't.

Her hand gripped his, the fear apparent in her eyes.

The words seemed jumbled inside her head along with her thoughts but she knew Grissom.

How could she forget the only person she'd ever loved?

"Nod yes or no. Understand?"

She nodded.

He smiled once again, squeezing her hand.

"Do you remember what happened?"

She glanced at her battered fingers and nodded, a single tear slipping down her cheek.

His thumb swiped it away as he leaned down and kissed her.

She visibly shook and he held her, cursing inwardly that she was so frightened.

"Darren Reed is dead. He can't hurt you," he whispered. "It's over."

She wanted to laugh.

It was almost the same thing he'd said when she'd survived the first time.

"We caught Natalie. She can't hurt you. It's over."

The door opened and Langston stepped inside.

Grissom wiped Sara's cheeks with his thumbs, and then wiped his own with his sleeve.

"She responded to questions," smiled Grissom.

Langston smiled.

"Sara, do you remember Ray?" asked Grissom.

She nodded.

Langston grinned. "Sara, has Gil made you answer all of the stupid questions that we doctors insist on knowing?"

Sara glanced at Grissom.

"We just got started," stated Grissom.

"Sara, what is your full name?" asked Langston.

Her breathing picked up as she glanced between the two men.

Grissom felt her anxiety. "Is your name Sara Jane Grissom?"

Sara pulled her hands from his as she struggled to sit up.

Grissom assisted her. "Sara…you didn't answer the question," said Langston eyeing her uneasiness at the question.

She stared at Grissom.

"Honey…don't you remember…when we got married?" he asked.

She nodded as she glanced at her finger to find her wedding ring was gone.

"The nurses removed it…hospital orders," he declared.

She seemed satisfied with his answer until she looked at his hand and noticed he wasn't wearing his wedding band.

Where is your wedding band, Griss?

You swore you would never take it off…

He felt embarrassed by it remembering he had removed it the day left the jungle, tossing into his suitcase.

He wasn't sure whether it was still there, not caring what happened to it.

Grissom leaned over to kiss her forehead once more.

She pulled back a little but Grissom ignored her, unable to keep himself from touching her.

"Sara, can you say something?" asked Langston.

She looked between the two men.

"Sara…say my name," whispered Grissom.

You were wearing it when you arrived in Costa Rica…

Just like I was wearing mine…

But you left suddenly...

why did you leave Gil?

Her breathing changed in an instant and Langston quickly took over. "No more questions," he soothed.

He took Sara's hand and held it while he glanced at the heart monitor. "Take slow…even breaths, Sara."

Langston waited a few minutes and then spoke. "Sara, you don't have to speak. You can just nod yes or no…understand?"

She nodded.

Langston smiled. "Just rest."

Langston motioned for Grissom to step out of the room but Sara gripped his hand, not wanting to let go.

"I'm not leaving her," whispered Grissom.

"No questions. She needs rest…no visitors unless they can just…be here…nothing more," Langston ordered.

There were a thousand questions that Grissom wanted to ask but not at the moment.

Sara was obviously scared and upset.

He was hopeful when she had not wanted him to leave the room but her actions were still distant.

The next few days she slipped in and out of sleep, checking the chair beside her bed to see if he remained.

Each time he was there.

The guys appeared one by one.

They talked softly, letting her know how much they cared and then left without asking a single question.

Catherine offered to do her nails but she hid her hands underneath the blanket, ashamed at what she had tried to do.

Grissom pulled them out, kissing each finger tip.

They hurt but Grissom was gentle, taking extra care not to squeeze too tight.

He often put ointment on them, kissing the palm of her hand when he finished each time.

Even in sleep, he refused to break the physical contact.

He held her hand while she slept helping to keep the nightmares at bay.

When she caught him asleep she tried to speak, opening her mouth but nothing came out.

Her thoughts were there to be said but it pained her when she couldn't utter a sound.

Each time she tried to speak, she became agitated, striking out at the nurses and doctors by refusing to interact, throwing notepads and anything she could grasp into the floor.

It was infuriating how they treated her as if she was some child, some person…with brain damage.

She was still the same Sara Sidle except she could not speak.

Inwardly she knew her thought processes were slow or garbled at times but each day she felt the "fog" slowly lifting.

She refused any sort of testing, becoming highly agitated, not wanting to admit she was still not herself yet.

Once or twice she swore she saw Heather lurking in the halls.

The stench of her perfume wafted in the air once or twice causing her behavior to become erratic.

Grissom seemed to be the only person who could calm her outburst.

He patiently let her vent and then quietly took her hand into his, kissing her palm as he spoke softly to her.

His voice soothed her outbursts easing her into submission like a moth to a flame.

If he attempted to leave, she became agitated, fearing he would disappear like he'd done so many times in her dreams.

He only slipped away when she slept, making quick trips to the cafeteria or just down the hall to stretch his legs.

On the fifth day, a new doctor appeared.

"Sara, this is Dr. Franklin. She is going to talk with you for awhile," said Langston. "Gil and I will be just outside the door."

Sara shook her head.

"I'll stay," offered Grissom.

"Sara, if you don't want your husband to leave then tell me," stated Dr. Franklin.

"She hasn't spoken," whispered Grissom.

"I know that Mr. Grissom. I was trying to give her an incentive. Dr. Langston noted in his chart that she seems fearful when you leave the room."

"Oh great, talk as those the invalid can't understand," thought Sara as she turned away clearly upset about the intrusion into her room.

"Yes…she does," Grissom said quietly.

"I'd like for you to leave then," she stated.

Sara arched her eye brow.

Grissom hesitated.

"It will be alright," Dr. Franklin assured him.

Grissom started toward the door but glanced back.

Sara's eyes pleaded with him to remain.

"I'll be just outside the door," he urged.

Sara's eyes widened as the door opened and Grissom stepped out.

Dr. Franklin sat down in the chair that had been vacated by Grissom.

Grissom leaned against the door. "She's making progress," urged Langston. "Maybe Dr. Franklin can assess whether her inability to speak is emotional rather than physical."

"She…was suffering from post traumatic stress…after the first time. I'm not sure she had fully recovered when this happened," offered Grissom.

"Gil…she's fortunate to be alive. Her head injury was significant…I'm still concerned about the seizures but the medication seems to be working. We'll need to do a battery of tests to determine…the extent of the brain damage."

Grissom glanced at the floor. "Do you…think…it's extensive?"

"I really can't say. She refuses to submit to any testing. Gil…you may need to consider a treatment facility that specializes in brain injuries."

Grissom shook his head violently.

He refused to accept that Sara would never be the same as she was before.

Langston was called to the nurses' station.

Grissom leaned back on the wall, closing his eyes.

He felt a warm hand on his arm.

He opened his eyes to see Heather standing there.

"I heard…about the shooting," she said.

"It's over," he said.

"You were injured," she stated.

His hand went instinctively to the wound.

He hadn't even given much attention to the bandage on his arm, too engrossed with Sara's care.

Heather tugged at his arm. "May I see it?"

"The bullet just grazed the surface…nothing serious," he replied.

Her hand pulled up his sleeve, letting her fingertips caress the bandaged area.

"You were lucky," she whispered. "If anything would have happened to you…"

"I'm fine," he smiled, grateful for her concern.

Besides Langston and Catherine, the others were distant, letting him know they held him responsible for Sara's injuries.

Heather glanced toward Sara's room. "How…is she?"

"Possible brain damage…she's can't speak," he cried.

Heather took him into her arms. "I'm sorry. It must be hard…knowing that the Sara you loved…is gone."

He pushed her away. "She's not….she's….."

"Gil…people can be retrained when they suffer from brain damage but they are never the same."

"I'll take her any way I can get her."

"Can you?"

"What do you mean?" he asked angrily.

"It's too soon to be having this discussion. Let's see…how…Sara…is and then we can discuss the ramifications. I'll help you…get through it. We'll…talk about options."

He nodded tiredly and she smiled. "It's going to be alright."

Note from author:

Well you didn't think she would stay out of the picture did you? Sorry for the late posting but I had a house full of people tonight and we had loads of fun! Where is everybody this weekend? Someone owes me some reviews...don't make me hunt you down. LOL

Take care!