Descent into Madness

Summary: What would have happened if Sheldon didn't decipher the earworm when he did? What if he was an hour too late? Will they ever be able to get over what she did? Set around S09E10 earworm reverberation. A bit of angst.

Disclaimer: The Big Bang Theory is owned by Chuck Lorre Productions and The Warner Brothers Studios

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Chapter 8: Letting go

Time. Many believe that it is linear. That no matter what you do, and no matter where you go, it will keep moving forward, tic by tic, second by second. It has no beginning and it has no end. It is constant throughout the universe, a force that cannot be halted. Yet there are some who also believe that time stands still in the heart of a black hole. That the sheer density of its gravity is strong enough to stop it. Nothing exists in the singularity. No thoughts, no feelings, no time. Everything is frozen in space.

That's what Sheldon and Amy were feeling right this very moment. The sheer gravity of their emotions freezing them in their place, the weight of their thoughts holding them still. It felt as though time stopped, and nothing existed around them. It was as though nothing has, and nothing ever will exist around them. It was only the two of them in the universe. In their universe. They were like binary stars. They revolved around each other.

"What took you so long?"

Sheldon was the first to speak, trepidation clear in his voice. He thought he had lost her. He thought she was gone. In some unknown place where he would never be able to see her again. He almost surrendered to that idea when he got penny's message, but his heart would not give in. He waited in her apartment, hoping beyond hope that she would come home. When he heard the jingle of her keys outside her door, he crossed the room so fast to greet her. The very sight of her in the hallway was enough to be still his heart.

She continued to look up at him in wonder. He wants to know what took her so long? She had parked on the side of the road, crying her heart out because of this very man in front of her. Because she crumbed from the knowledge that she would never be with Sheldon ever again. What was he doing here? Why did he come to see her? Didn't he have a new woman in his life? The anger was starting to seep into her mind again and she pushed passed him into her living room.

"What are you doing here, Sheldon?" She asked, not bothering to disguise her irritation. He closed the door and turned to look at her. Even when angry, she was the most beautiful thing he had ever been subjected to. "I came here for you." She scoffed at his words, going into the kitchen and heating up some water for her tea. She needed it. "You have a new girlfriend. I saw her. She was in your spot!" That was a sore spot for her, no pun intended. He never allowed her to sit there. He followed her into the kitchen, his eyes urging her to listen. "She's not my girlfriend, Amy-"

"-Yeah, that's what you said about me, too, back in the day." She cut him off, memories of their entire love story flooding her mind. Tears were starting to creep their way out again and she cursed them for revealing how vulnerable she was feeling. The sight was squeezing at his heart. "Amy, please…" He reached out to touch her, but she squirmed away. "No, Sheldon. I saw you two having lunch at work. And I saw her in your home hanging out with all your friends. All our friends!" The tears were streaming down again, making her feel utterly enraged. He had no right to see her like this. No right. She stormed to the door, yanked it open and motioned for him to go. "You need to leave. Now." He was unmoved in the kitchen. "No." His lack of cooperation only making her madder. "I said leave, Sheldon! Get out!" He still did not move. "And I said no. I'm not leaving. You are going to listen to me." He was a fool before, walking away without talking to her first. Making assumptions without knowing any facts. He would be damned if he walked out again without clearing everything up. He took the kettle off the stove and started making tea. So many days, she wished to have him back here in her home performing such mundane tasks. Here he was now, yet it was not at all what she wanted. She should be packing. She should be getting ready to leave Pasadena behind and forget about all this chaos. She should not be entertaining the thought of letting him talk to her. There's no way it could bring anything but pain.

He brought the tea to the living room, and set them down on the coffee table. "Please join me." He said in a calm voice. She closed the door and sat down on the opposite end of the couch. "Why are you doing this, Sheldon? Haven't you tortured me enough?" She asked, looking down at her hands. There wasn't anything he could possibly say to make her feel better.

So he didn't.

He scooted closer to her, crossing the distance between them in one swift motion, and did something he had been dreaming about for weeks now. He grabbed the back of her neck and crushed his lips to hers.

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Penny walked into 4A feeling agitated. She hoped her two friends could figure everything out, but they were both extremely stubborn, and both extremely hurt. That was not a productive combination. Not to mention the fact that, shortly after dropping Sheldon off at Amy' building, she received a text message from her brunette friend that she was leaving town. She wondered if Amy even went home to pack her bags, or if she just drove to the airport and left everything behind. Surely Sheldon would have texted her by now to pick him up if he never got to speak to Amy… right?

Leonard was sitting on the couch studying her, a tense look on his face. She knew he was worried about his roommate, but she didn't have any consoling information. She shook her head at his questioning gaze. "I don't know if they're going to fix this." She said, sitting down next to her husband. "I don't even know if they will ever see each other again." And she explained the text message to Leonard. He sighed. What was going to happen now? Will Sheldon be able to deal with this turn of events? Will he get on a train like he did before? What if he never comes back? "I hope they find each other." He said, pulling Penny in for a hug. "I hope… I hope they make things right."

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She wanted to resist him. She wanted to pull him closer. She wasted to tell him how angry she was. She wanted to feel more of him. She wanted to get answers. She wanted… She wasn't sure what she wanted anymore, her head was swimming with dopamine and oxytocin… her head was swimming with Sheldon. His lips on hers, his hands grasping her close to him, the way he tilted his head and parted her lips, the feel of their chests colliding. She was overruled by her love for him, it was hard to think straight, but she had to stop this. She placed her hands on his chest and weakly pushed. He slowly pulled away, but kept his eyes on her. There was a look in them that she was sure she's never seen before. It was a lack of control. It was giving in. It was letting go.

"You have someone new." She reminded him, breathing hard, glancing away. With the way he was looking at her, it was hard not to pull him back in again. He shook his head. "There is no one else. There has never been anyone else. There will never be anyone else." He moved his face closer to hers, making her body feel incredibly hot. "There is only you, Amy." He said, his words searing deep into her soul. He remained near, but still, waiting for her to close the gap this time. Just a few inches. She thought to herself, but resisted the urge. "Then what was she doing in your apartment? What was she doing in your spot?" He moved away again, feeling exasperated. How could she ever think he would let anyone sit in his spot, let alone some woman he barely even knew? "She just sat there, Amy. I made her move once I came out of the bathroom." He explained. "And I invited her to play D&D because… well… I found her voice to be quite soothing." Amy was feeling rage again at this confession and it was evident on her face. "She reminded me of you. Her voice reminded me of when you would try to comfort me. I didn't want to let go of that feeling." He continued, feeling extremely sheepish. Amy gasped at this. He missed her. He missed her so much that he would take anything that reminded him of her. "So you didn't… like her that way?" She questioned, needing confirmation. "God, no." He responded, as though the mere thought of it was preposterous. She nodded her head, happy to know he wasn't actually dating that woman. Still, there was something he needed to know. "Sheldon, about Dave… I'm not seeing him." She started, not sure which details were important. "And I never slept with him, I swear to you-"

"-I know." He interjected. "Penny told me." He smiled at her, a smile she hasn't seen in a long time. It was as though this very knowledge lifted a weight from his shoulders and she was overcome by waves of emotion. This man was everything to her. His smile was all she ever wanted to see. "Amy, if you want to be my girlfriend again, I really want to be your boyfriend." He stated, moving closer to her yet again. "I really want that, too." She replied, so incredibly happy that he still had faith in their relationship. "Good. Because I love you." He continued, taking her breath away. She could not contain the joy that was showing on her face. "I love you, too!"

No one had to tell the brilliant fool what to do next. He moved in and claimed her lips once more. This is what happiness means. This is what love means. This is what desire means. There wasn't anything in the universe as sweet as Amy. There wasn't anything as powerful as his feelings for her. She was his black hole. She stopped time and drew him in. Once he made his way to the singularity, he could not make his way back out again. He was lost in her, and he was lost without her, and he wouldn't have it any other way. Now… life was finally, truly back in order again.

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Penny and Leonard were pacing back and forth with worry. Neither of them have heard from Sheldon or Amy. It's been hours since they've been seen by anyone. What on Earth could have happened? Where on Earth could they be? Did Sheldon find her? Did they both leave Pasadena because of their pain? Good lord, this was going to drive them crazy. None of their text messages and calls were answered. They've left countless voice mails as wells and nothing. They were starting to wonder if they should call the cops. But then again, if Sheldon or Amy wanted to leave, that was their choice. It wasn't really a matter to call the police over. A few seconds later, Leonard got a text from Sheldon. He read it out loud to his wife.

"I won't be coming home tonight."

The two of them exchanged a look of horror. Oh no. This could not be good.

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Phew, I got through this chapter without crying. I hope you guys enjoyed this.

Anyway, I suck at endings. I seriously, seriously suck at endings. This was supposed to be the final chapter, but I could not figure out how to end it. I guess there might have to be an epilogue...